ASHLEY POV

The idea of entering a relationship has temporarily been shelved ever since I ended my last relationship 2 years ago. It’s not because I am still not over my previous boyfriend, I am. It’s just that I’m scared of going thru all the pain again just for love. Instead, I’ve drowned myself with work and I am not regretting my decision. People say I work too hard but I found a way to find enjoyment in the things I’m doing.

My friends would normally ask me to go out and meet people but I don’t really find the need to do so. Thus, I end up ditching the dates or acting bored whenever I’m in one. It’s been a long time that I actually felt attraction with someone.

However, these past few days, I’ve been feeling something weird. When I say weird, I mean something I don’t quite understand.  It’s easy for me to know when someone will end up being a close friend to me and who’s going to end up having more than friendship and what I’m feeling now is definitely not just on a friendship level but not yet on the love level. Yes, I’m talking about Seunghyun. I don’t exactly know what I’m feeling right now, all I know is it feels good. I’m the type of person who wouldn’t feel comfortable around someone easily, but I guess, Seunghyun is an exception to that. Ever since we met in the playground when he looked very vulnerable, there’s always this urge of taking care of him that I always feel. The constant crossing of our paths didn’t help at all. There’s something with him that would always draw me closer to him. My body unconsciously reacts towards him.

For instance, last night. The moment he said that he hasn’t eaten anything, my body reacted on its own and found myself dragging him to a restaurant and making sure he eats to his fill. And the genuine feeling of relief I felt when I saw him eating his heart out bothers me. Why am I feeling this way? Am I really attracted to him or I’m just comfortable around him? Aish! This is his fault! Why can’t he even take care of himself?! He knows pretty well that he needs all the energy he could get since his work requires truckloads of it but he would skip his meals! Aigoo. He’s like a kid asking to be taken care off.

Today is Big Bang’s F1 Concert. The concert is not until 7pm but I woke up really early. This is something new to me since I’m not much of a morning person. I’d cherish every possible minute I could spare sleeping than waking up on time. However, today, I just woke up feeling happy and excited. I suddenly felt like texting Seunghyun and reminding him about stuff he most probably would be forgetting,

To Seunghyun: Good morning Oppa! Don’t forget to eat your breakfast! It’s the most important meal of the day. Don’t s