༺ o 6 9 ༻

“Jaewon!” Kai shouted going back to the house and went to her room.

He opened the door but there’s no sign of his wife on the rocking chair.

‘Where is she?’ Kai thought roaming around the room finding a hint of Jaewon’s whereabouts.

He came back to the door and was about to leave when he saw an envelope on the rocking chair. He slowly approached the chair and took the envelope out of curiosity.

He knew that the letter is for Junhoe and the one owning the handwriting is Jaewon. He mentally shook his head as he tore the envelope and opened the folded paper.

            Junhoe,

                        If you don’t see me at this room right now, I’m at the nearest beach. I need to come out of this house just for once. I need to breathe some fresh air. My problems get me depressed. I need a time to relax with all the problems occurring. I promise I’ll be back after the day.

-Jaewon

“Nearest beach?” Kai mumbled and left the house hopping on his car.

He looked around the road finding the nearest beach. It took not a long time before he stopped the car at the beach he saw. He hopped out of the car running to the beach hoping a sign of Jaewon was at sight.

He sighed in relieve seeing a girl’s back facing the sea. He ran towards her knowing that it’s Jaewon.

“Wifey” he called a warm smile appeared on his lips.

Hearing his voice, Jaewon can’t help but to shut her eyes tightly, teeth gritted to each other behind her lips.

“… I don’t know if you already heard the news. But, if you still don’t, I’ll say it to you” he paused taking a long deep breath.

“News came up about Choa’s pregnancy and she claims me as the father of the baby she’s carrying. I want to tell you that I’m not the legit father of the child. I admit we had but I am sure that I used protection that time—“Kai stopped hearing a long sigh came from Jaewon.

“I already know about the news Jongin. That’s why I’m here” she answered softly; her eyes focused on the sea.

“Wifey—“

“Can you please stop calling me that for a while?” she told annoyed lightly shaking her head.

It remained silent. Kai didn’t speak knowing Jaewon will speak. He observed her movements. She stood there hands hugging her upper body as the wind gives her chills, she looks calm right now as the view serenades her. What he notices is her eyes; it doesn’t show a hint of tears from it, yet sadness is written to it.

Seeing her state you can distinguish her sadness… her weakness… her vulnerability.

Jaewon may look okay right now, but for Kai she isn’t. And it was his fault once again that he hurt her. He wants to hurt himself seeing her not happy at all when he’s around. She should be resting at the moment because of her condition, not like this. She shouldn’t worry even to little things. She should be preparing for her labor, not overthinking to things like this.

‘Great Kai! You’re not good handling these kinds of situations. You find a way to calm her down at least!’ he thought punching himself mentally.

“Good thing you told me about the news although I’m aware to it” she spoke softly. Kai’s lips curved up at the statement and was about to talk.

“You should’ve done that while you’re cheating on me. I should’ve known if you do that rather than seeing the actual. What’s worst is the things you wished you never imagine what your husband would do to you is the exact thing that happened” Jaewon added.

Kai’s smile faded staring at her, waiting for her next statements.

“I bet you like the up session more to Choa, hmm? I could tell” Jaewon blurted with a bit of harshness to her voice.

“Stop that Jaewon” Kai shook his head ruffling his hair.

“You’re more aware when you do the up session because you’re not drunk. In fact you’re having fun, right? Since that day is your birthday” Jaewon added muttering an adlibs her expression darkens.

“Jaewon, I don’t want to start a fight with you. Please stop saying these kinds of things. I am already guilty to it. I’m trying to solve this” Kai begged closing his eyes tightly.

“Guilty?” she questioned finally facing Kai sternly her brow raised. “For sure that ing me up and ending me up pregnant with our kids is your greatest guilt Jongin” she hissed clenching her fist.

“Jaewon, stop this. Please just stop” Kai softly told her voice breaking any seconds now.

“When will I experience someone who will stay by me until my last breath?”

Kai’s expression became serious before softening seeing tears flowing to Jaewon’s eyes.

“I’m here Jaewon. Wouldn’t you consider me as that someone who’ll stay besides you?” he asked weakly.

“I consider you as that someone Jongin. Ever since I began to love you” she answered softly yet weak her eyes gazing at Kai; hurt piercing right through him to feel her pain.

“I had to fight my love to you because I felt that you will be the one who stays beside me no matter what it takes. You didn’t leave by my side until my worst. You were there trying to brighten me up although I’m stubborn towards you. You were there cheering me up if I feel like giving up. You were there when I need someone to talk to. I wish it didn’t change Jongin, it didn’t change” she looked down giving up controlling her tears from falling.

“I wish that you’re still here beside me never letting me down”

Kai pulled her close and locked Jaewon into his arms. “I’m so sorry Jaewon” he whispered into her ears caressing her hair lovingly.

“I wish this doesn’t happen” she cried on his chest.

“I wish this was just a dream” Kai felt hot tears staining on his shirt as he hugged her tighter.

“I wish I never met you in my life”

Kai stood there doesn’t know what to react. “What are you saying Jaewon?”

He lifted her chin cupping both of her cheeks staring through her soft eyes lovingly.

“I wish these dramas never occurred to you Jongin-ah. Your life became miserable and boring because of me. You should be enjoying with your age right now. You should be still doing your Casanova ways than to be a father. If I never came into your life, this wouldn’t happen to you” Jaewon reasoned with a slight pout in her lips.

“My life would be fun and all. But, it’s boring and wouldn’t have a thrill if conflicts and problems never occurred to me. It’s natural to have a drama to every person’s lives Jaewon-ah. Don’t blame yourself to it. I’m the one who walks my own path. And this is the path where it leads me. God gave me a girl like you as a self-reflection of the right way on how to love a person. I’m thankful that you came into my life… you came back into my life” he softly told caressing her cheeks with his thumb.

He chuckled childishly seeing her nuzzling to his palms at the skin contact.

She stopped realizing something making her pulling away from him.

He looked at her confused. “What’s wrong?” he asked raising a brow.

‘This isn’t right’ she thought mentally shaking her head non-stop.

“I need to leave” she stated walking past Kai.

Kai shook his head and grabbed her wrist spinning her body facing him back.

“We’re not done talking yet” Kai told with a firm look.