imin pov~

I walked back home quickly ignoring how bad I felt for being mean to Jungkook. When I got home I grabbed my phone and called JB.

"Yo JB?" I asked.
"Yeah hey," he said quietly.
"Have you been to your dad's yet? Before he files a missing persons report," I asked concerned. 
"Naw he doesn't care if I disappeared he'd be happy. No worries. You sound stressed, did I do something?" He asked sadly.
"No it's just... I hate hurting people's feelings but sometimes I have to tell the truth," I said sighing.
"You wanna come over and talk about it?" He asked.
"I guess , it's not like I'm doing anything anyways," I said smiling. 
"Okay see ya," he said before hanging up.

I put my phone in my back pocket and headed out. It was about 7pm when I left but I've never been afraid of the dark. I'm more scared of people than I am of the night. I was about half way there when I got this feeling of being watched. Not like serial killer stalker being watched but like , somebody was there and didn't want me to know they were. I thought about turning around, what if it was somebody who would tell the others I knew where JB was. I was already half way there and it was getting late so I decided to continue on as if nothing was wrong. When I got there I quickly knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" A voice that belonged to JB asked.
"It's Jimin," I said rolling my eyes. 
He quickly opened the door and pulled me in. 
"Why are you being so precautious?" I asked. 
He looked out the window before closing the curtains.
"I never know when someone from the three groups are gonna find me. Id hate to be myself when they do," he said shaking. 
"Dude you think I'm gonna bring them here? After all the betraying I had to do to keep you safe?" I asked. 
"No but what if somebody followed you?" He asked.
I thought back to that feeling that somebody was here but I shook it off.
"No need to be worried JB. Nobody followed," I said half-heartedly.
"Okay. If you say so," he nodded.
"Wait...have you not left the house since ... Well since I've been in a coma?" I asked.
"No. Jin normally gets groceries for me. I can't stand the constant fear of one of your friends finding me," he said with a hint of worry.

"Where is Jin anyways?" I asked. 
"He went to visit the cemetery," JB muttered.
"Oh oka- wait, how do you know about his dad?" I asked confused.
"He told me a few weeks ago, when I was scared my father would find where I was," he said sadly.
"He must really trust you than. He's only ever told me about that," I said giving him a smile of reassurance. 
He smiled back before sitting down. 
"So, what happened?" JB asked folding his arms.

"Well.... Jungkook asked me out," I said beginning my story. 
"Isn't that the young kid you like? What's wrong with that?" He asked.
"Nothing. Except I thought he was lying about it. I could've sworn Jungkook Loved V. And I was so stressed about you and everything else that I sort of... Got mad at him. Well at everybody but he had to take most of it. Now I feel bad because I let my emotions out. But I've just been holding all that back for so long that, him asking me out was like the final straw. I blew up and now I've upset a lot of people," I said looking down at my feet.

"Well Jimin, I know I'm not the right person to tell you what I think but, I don't see why you should take the blame for it. I know that sounds selfish but, sometimes in order to fix things you have to tell them everything. You say you forgive them but forgiving isn't just letting things be. If you don't tell them everything and I mean EVERYTHING than you're never going to really forgive them will you?" He asked raising an eyebrow. I thought about it for a second. "I guess you're right," I said slowly. I looked up to meet his eyes ," maybe I'm the one at fault.... Not them," I said. 

He rolled his eyes ," That's not the point Jimin you're taking it wrong. It's not your fault , it never was. Jimin friends are there to stick by you through thick and thin. If they don't forgive you for telling them the truth...than they're not really friends are they?" He said rhetorically. I was getting a little upset. Was he blaming my friends? He doesn't know them. "Listen just because your friends left you doesn't mean you can tell me whether my friends are real or not," I said aggressively.

My anger left when I realized what I just said. I looked up to see his eyes start to water. "JB.... I didn't mean...." Before I could get out what I wanted to say he ran upstairs and slammed his door. I slammed my head on the table, what was wrong with me? Why am I acting like such a jerk?

I quickly went upstairs and knocked. He told me I could come in and I quietly crept in and sat next to him. "JB I didn't mean what I said. I can't say you wouldn't understand because you do. I know what it's like to feel lonely. I've just been a jerk to everyone lately and I've had no way of getting any relief. I feel like I'm about to have a mental breakdown every five minutes and every day it gets harder and harder. Before I could just cut my wrists and it was like all the stress and pain would go away. Now I've been clean for so long it's getting to me. I just want to scream and let all of my emotions out but I just can't," I said putting my hands on my knees like I always do when I get stressed.

He put his arm around my shoulder ," I would do anything to have my friends back but I guess life just doesn't want me to be happy. I guess that's how you feel huh? Jimin I've never self harmed because this is the first time I've ever even admitted that I was depressed. But Jimin no matter what , you are strong enough to get through this. I promise," he said smiling. I nodded giving him a small smile," Yeah you're right. I just feel like I'm gonna break any second and I don't know what to do about it. I'm just not happy anymore it seems," I said. "Why not?" He asked. " I don't know I just feel like the hardest part isn't over yet. I feel like I did that day at the bridge and I never want it to come to that," I said sighing. He nodded," get some sleep, you'll be okay," he said laying down on his bed. I nodded and went to the guest bedroom. He just doesn't understand. Telling me I'm going to be okay doesn't make me okay. Nobody listens. I guess I have to make them listen.