Jin~~

When I woke up JB wasn't there. I looked all around. It terrifies me, was he going to try something. I looked all around the house until I found the note behind the door. I read it out loud to my self ," Dear Jin, don't be worried. I'm not about to do something I'll regret. I didn't want to wake you so I'm leaving this note. I'm just going out for air don't worry. I'm okay, I promise. You should go check on Jimin now the members sent you a text, you can visit him now. See you later. ~ sincerely, JB."

I sighed of relief. JB was okay. I gasped remember the part about Jimin. I looked at the clock. It was 4 pm now. I was too late. I sighed falling on the bed. I missed visiting hours. And I slept the entire day away. I guess when something really bad was going on I always seemed to sleep more. I shook my head as I hopped out of bed. I grabbed all my stuff and left out the door.

I didn't have my car so I had to walk. As soon as I was about 1/4 there it started to rain. Of course, it always seemed to happen to me. I was wearing a thick black hoodie so it only seemed normal to throw the hood over my head . I looked at the floor while walking, trying to ignore the rain. The rain always brought this cold and dark feeling I couldn't stand. Rain brought back horrible memories.

I tried to close my eyes. I heard the pattering of the rain against the ground. I started panicking, It brought me back to that day.

Flashback:
I told him to leave. Mom didn't deserve that man. He's nothing but street trash. He couldn't supply us with anything. He slapped mom. I would never let my mother get hurt. I remember closing the door on him. Mom tried to run out but I held her back. "You don't need him mom. All he will ever do is hurt you," I said to her. "But I love him!" My mom screamed to me. The crying of my mother and the sound of the rain hitting against the Windows outside was so loud I couldn't focus.

I let go of my mom who fell onto the chair balling her eyes out. I heard the thumping of Dad knocking on the door. I opened the door expecting to hear yelling or screaming from both my mom and my dad. Instead my father was silent. I looked into his eyes, "I thought I told you to get out," I muttered between my teeth. "I'm sorry Jin. You and mom both deserve someone better than me. I hurt your mom and in that process I hurt you. I would do anything for just one more chance. Jin I swear, if I could take everything back I would. I got rid of my drinking problem what else do you expect from me? I've tried so hard for you two. I know I act out of anger sometimes but, doesn't everybody deserve a second chance?" My father said as I saw the tears fall from my eyes. "Don't you understand? We've give you chance after chance and all you do is mess it up. Get out of here and never come back. Maybe when you learn a little responsibility you can have a new family for yourself. I never want to see you on this property again," I said through gritted teeth. He shook his head in disgrace before walking off.

He was crossing the street when I was about to go inside. I turned around when I heard a screech of tires breaking and a loud thump followed soon after. I turned around quickly. "Dad!" I screamed running down to the sidewalk. The car backed up and turned around faster than I thought was possible. I tried to run after him but I realized helping my father was what was more important. I quickly ran back to my mother sobbing on the road. There was blood everywhere and my father's body laid on the ground.

Mom told me to call the cops but deep inside, I knew. He was gone. His clothes were ripped and he had cuts all around his body. I hated the man but I never wanted.... This. It was like everything was in slow motion. Most of it seemed to be a blur.

I only remember the sound of the rain hitting against the ground and the cries of my mom increased as the time went on. It wasn't long before the ambulance came. But before they even said it, I wasn't surprised. My mom however still held onto that small hope he was okay.

When they pronounced that he was dead my mom fell to the floor. They hauled his body off and I had to drag my mother into the house so we could get out of the rain. I stood by the window as my mom cried and begged for him to come back in the bedroom upstairs. He wasn't coming back.

My mother only came down once that night. When she calmed down she began screaming," This is all your fault Jin! You kicked him out! You're the reason he's dead! You're a disgrace Jin." My mom went up stairs and I didn't hear her for the rest of the day. The reason being is when I finally went upstairs the door was cracked open.

I expected crying but an hour or so before the crying had suddenly stopped. I figured she fell asleep, that's why I went to check on her. Instead I came face to face with my mom's dead body hanging there. I called the police but once again, I already knew, she was gone too. I cried more than I ever cried before.

When the paramedics came again they explained to me that this stuff happens more than you think. I thought I would be taken to an adoption center but since I was 16 the paramedics said I could stay with family. I told them I would stay at my brother's house even though my brothers were really my 6 best friends.

When they left , the house was completely silent. I sat in the middle of the room and closed my eyes. I begged for this to be a dream. The tears didn't stop falling for a long time. There was no note, there was nothing. My
Moms last words rang in my head. It was all my fault. I'm the one who caused this. If I would've let things go, both of them would've been here.

That night I didn't sleep at all. I simply sat there, listening to the rain, the thing that would bring me back to that day for years to come.

End of flashback:

As I opened my eyes I was brought back into reality. By now I could already see our house in sight. I never told the boys I had lost both my parents. I didn't want them to have to feel bad for me. They weren't there, they couldn't do anything. It was all me. I was the one who caused it and the only one who could've stopped it. But I guess for every action there's a reaction. Too bad it had to be death. Death scared me. I would do anything to escape death. I pretend to be happy but inside, I'm just as broken as the rest...