"Minho-ah, where are you going so early in the morning?" shouted Onew hyung from the couch. 

"Hyung, I'm going out. I will be back later" I said, running out the door while putting on my jacket.

I just got a call from Noona saying that she needed to see me. At first I thought she just wanted to hang out while Taeyang hyung was in Japan but then I heard her voice crack. After that I noticed how her voice trembled and how weak she sounded on the phone. Thank God she doesn't live too far away or else my manager wouldn't have agreed to take me to her. 

When we stopped in front of her dorm, I ran to the door and knocked on it till she opened it. 

"Noona, what's wrong?" 

"Minho-ah.... Bae Oppa.... might be...... *sob*..... and.... I might have a..... *sob*"

She broke down right there in the doorway. I pulled her into my arms and led her inside the apartment. When we got inside, she continued to cry into my shirt. 

I don't think I have ever seen her this weak before, and it is scaring me a little bit. Didn't she say something about Taeyang hyung before? I wonder what happened? Didn't she also say something about she might have something? 

PLEASE DO NOT TELL ME SHE IS PREGNANT WITH TAEYANG HYUNG'S BABY! I will die if she tells me that. 

"Tori noona, what's wrong? What's wrong with Taeyang hyung?" I asked as her sobs started to die down.

"I think he might be cheating on me with another girl. I saw the article on the internet and the video they did for his solo concert last year. Then she picked up his phone when I called so..." she started crying again. 

"So what?" I asked, don't tell me she is going to stay with him after he might be cheating on her. 

"I told him that we are taking a break until he gets back from Japan at the end of the month. It hurts more to think that we aren't together than that he cheated on me. Minho-ah, please tell me that I'm not an idiot for still loving him. Please help me.... help me.... please."

She started sobbing again and I guided her to the couch and sat down with her still crying into my shirt. It hurt me to know that she still loves him even after finding out that he might be cheating on her, but it hurts worse to see Tori noona like this. She is broken and Taeyang hyung probably doesn't even know about this. He is probably doing a concert right now, acting like nothing happened and having the time of his life with the other girl. 

"Noona, what might you have? What were you going to tell me earlier?" I asked.

"Minho-ah.... the doctors think I might have a blood clot in my leg" she said, crying more as her sobs went down.

Phew, she's not pregnant. It's just a possible blood clot..................... BLOOD CLOT! She could die if it really is a blood clot!

"You've gotten it checked out, right? Who all knows about this? What are the doctors going to do if it is a blood clot?"

"Minho, calm down. I'm getting an ultrasound later to find out if it one or not. Teddy Oppa and YG Oppa know about it, and YG Oppa told Big Bang, 2NE1, and Se7en Oppa about it. I don't know if they told anyone else. If it is a blood clot, I will have to have surgery on my leg to get it out."

"SURGERY!! WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU HAVE TO GET SURGERY A MONTH BEFORE YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DEBUT? DO THEY KNOW THAT IT WOULD CAUSE YOU TO HAVE TO PUSH YOUR DEBUT BACK OR THAT THEY WOULD HAVE TO DROP YOU FROM THE LINE-UP?"

"Minho.... MINHO!!!" shouted Tori noona.

"YG Oppa already said that we wouldn't until he knew about what was going on. Don't worry about it. But I was wondering if I could ask you a favor."

"Anything. Whatever it is, just ask."

"Can you go to the ultrasound with me? Teddy and YG Oppa can't make it so I will have to go alone, but I'm scared. So, can you go with me or do you have a schedule? I understand if you can't, I mean you are famous" she started rambling on.

"Noona, I'll go with you. I don't want to leave you alone when you're scared. But aren't ultrasounds those things they do to look at babies inside the womb? Why would they do that on your leg?" I asked, trying to get her to laugh or feel something other than sadness.

"You already know the answer to those questions. What were you doing before I interrupted your peaceful morning?"

"The SHINee dorm is anything but peaceful in the morning. Everyone is trying to get up without stepping on anyone and then trying to get dressed and eat and then we all have our weird morning routines. I swear it's a circus over there" I said, laughing at the thought of Jonghyun hyung fighting with Taemin-ah over the T.V. channels and Key and Onew hyung fighting over what to have for breakfast.

"It sounds fun. Better than living alone in a huge dorm" she said, looking around at the apartment we were in.

"I'm kind of jealous of this place. It's twice as big as our dorm but it has only one person living in it. Why is that?"

"Ji Oppa gave it to me. All the extra rooms are used for my recording studio, practice room, guest bedroom, and extra closets. Of course I use the master bedroom for my room, but with Ji Oppa's shopping habits, I need the extra closet space" she said as she pointed to each of the rooms.

We continued talking and doing random things until she fell asleep against my shoulder. I looked at her sleeping face. She literally has the face of an angel when she sleeps. I shift us so she is sleeping against my chest and I can hold her there. She starts moving and I thought she was going to wake up. Instead she snuggles against my chest and continues to sleep. 

She shouldn't be crying over Taeyang hyung. I want her to love me and care about me the way she does Taeyang hyung, but I know that it will never be the same even if we do end up together. She will always love Taeyang hyung more than anyone else. Maybe, she is right when she said that they were a match made in heaven. Both of them are perfect for each other, as much as I hate to admit it. 

But so are we, right? I mean, she must care about me as more than a friend since I was the first person she called to cry in front of. She also asked me to go with her to the ultrasound tomorrow. 

I don't care if they are perfect for each other. I'm in love with her and I want her to love me too..... even for a second. 

I started playing with her hair, feeling how soft it was and how it moved through my fingers like silk. I watched her face as she slept and couldn't help asking her the things I would never ask her when she was awake.

"Why do you have to look at me like a dongsang? For you, I could become the man you always dreamt of. Why? Why can't you look at me like a man for even a second?"

I watched her face as she slept before asking her the question that has been running rabid through my brain since I confessed to her.

"Why can't you love me? Why can't you love me even for a second?"

Without thinking, I leant down and pressed my lips to hers. When I opened my eyes, she was still sound asleep. I laid down and fell asleep thinking about the feel of her lips on mine.