I recommend listening to this song while reading this one. 

"I'm so sorry, ma'am." Amber kept bowing her head. She just got involved in a collision. She collided with the rear part of the car. The driver was furious. She was still disoriented from bumping her head too hard. 

"You should pay for the damages! Don't you dare escape the scene!" The driver yelled at her. She wanted to cry from feeling all the pain all at once. Her heart hurts a lot and her body. She doesn't even know what to tend first. 

"Oppa, calm down. She already said she'll pay for everything." The lady told her brother. She was the one who mostly talked to Amber calmly.

"Here's my calling card and ID, ma'am." She gave her details to the woman, but still, everything was a blur. 

"We need to go to the police station to report this and get an incident report for the insurance."

"I understand, ma'am." With her head still bowing deeply to the woman.

"Are you okay? You're injured."

"I'll be fine. Let's go to the police station." She smiled slightly.

"Hi, I am not available to receive your call at this time. Please leave your message after the beep." She can't even count how many times she heard that prompt. She wanted to go home but she was apprehensive about Soojung. She's not even worrying about herself. The heck she just got into an accident but the moment they were done in the police station her first thoughts were to get to Soojung real quick. 

"Soojung, just tell me you're safe and I'll leave you alone. I'm just really worried about you. Please just message me if you got this. Be safe." It has been always like this. She made herself too available that Soojung wouldn't even care if she didn't exist anymore.

*ring ring*

"Hello?" She heard someone answer. 

"Soojung? Hey? Soojung?"

"Hello? Hello?" 

"Babe come on. Let's go home. Where are you? Tell me your exact location."

"Who's this?" That's when it hit her. Someone else answered the phone and it was not Soojung.

"Amber. Amber Liu." She said hoping the other person would hand over the phone to Soojung. 

"Amber who? You're Soojung's what?" She hesitated to say her partner. They weren't together. 

"Her friend. I need to pick her up."

"Why would you pick her up? No one's gonna get picked up here." 

"." She heard them laugh. Was it the way she talked? Then they hung up on her. She decided to go to Soojung's apartment. She tried washing her wounds up. She was burning with fever but it didn't faze her. She needs to make sure Soojung is safe.

*message received*

Soojung: You should go home. I'm staying here.

Amber: Krys, we need to talk.

Soojung: Please just go home. I don't want to talk.

Soojung: Just go home

Amber: Krys please

Soojung: Don't make this hard for me. 

Soojung: I'm not going home. I'll stay here.

Amber: Krys please. I just really need to see you.

Soojung: Amber just go home. I don't want to talk to you. 

Soojung: We'll talk tomorrow when I'm sober so go home now. 

Amber: Let me just see you and say everything I want to say then I won't bother you anymore

Soojung: Please Amber. I need time to think. 

Soojung: Go home. Please. Just go home. 

Amber: Do you still love me? Why are you being like this?

Soojung: Just go home. We'll talk when I'm sober. 

Soojung: Not now. 

Amber: Is there someone else?

Soojung: Amber please. Don't make this any harder.

Soojung: You should go home. There's no one else.

Amber: I was in an accident. 

Soojung: You should go home. I ain't going home tonight. 

She left the apartment. Forced herself to drive. She had a fever and every inch of her hurt. She didn't even know how she managed to drive in that condition. 

*one message received*

Soojung: Where you at?

She ignored it and continued driving. She felt so lost. 

"Seul..."

"Yo, Amber?" 

"It hurts. Like ." She said while trying to hold her tears back.

"Are you driving? Where you at right now?"

"I stopped driving. I'm in the middle of nowhere."

"I'm gonna get you."

"You don't have to."

"Ber, obviously you're not in the right state to drive."

"Why can't she look at me, the way I look at her, Seul? Is something wrong with me?"

"No, but you already know the answer to that question, Amber. You're in denial." 

"I just love her so much. I love her so much that I don't have the heart to leave her amidst all these."

"But it's killing you."

"It's worth it."

"Is it really?"

"It is. She is worth it."

"I don't think she is, Am. Look, there'll be a lot of people waiting for someone like you to be in their life. Don't waste your life like this Am"

"I wish I could just stop feeling, Seul. Like I want to feel numb. I don't want to feel anymore."

"Just hang on there buddy. You'll get through this."

"How to move on, Seul."

"You should stop lying to yourself. Just accept she won't feel the same way. People have the tendency to take things for granted which are free of cost."

"She said she loves me."

"Does she really?" The longer she dragged the conversation, the more she realized her friend was right. 

"If a person truly loves you, she will at least be concerned about how are you feeling right now and if you are well. Think about that, Amber. You're better than this."

"Seul- I-"

"Stop convincing yourself. Stop doing this to yourself. YOU.ARE.KILLING.YOURSELF."

"I love her so much."

"You'll find someone better. Someone who will treat you right."

"She is treating me right."

"Seriously? Are you blind?"

"She's just. She has a lot of things to think."

"And you obviously are not one of them. You know what Amber, do whatever makes you happy."

"Thank you, Seul."

"Hey it's me, I hope you feel better. Sorry if I was really pushy. I'll stop bothering you. Take care of yourself. I love you. So much. I hope you know that. Just chat with me if you need me. Saranghae, Soojung-ah." It was a lie. She can never message her back. She threw away her phone and drove away.