Luhan turned to his side, curling up as he tried to stifle his tears. It was no use, though – they just kept coming and coming and drenched his pillow while he lay in pool of misery. He was too tired to even take off his boots and too miserable to care.

The way she'd cried into his neck while he piggy-backed her all the way – her tears drenching his shoulder as much as his fell down his cheeks – made his heart clench with pain. He'd never thought, never in a million years, that they would end up fighting.

And over a stupid thing like that. So what if she didn't like Lily being in his room – in fact, he was glad she didn't like Lily being in his room. But how could she expect him to not react to the news that she had guys in her room?

And not just guys but Kai – his only rival against Mei. Dammit, she wasn't the only one who could feel jealous! His beast growled at the thought, insisting that he go and claim her right now, so there would be no threat. He thought of the way she'd slapped his hand away and how she'd refused to look at him, even while he carried her and left her on the doorstep…

The beast howled in misery and a similar one tore out of his throat.

He punched his bed. Then, because it wasn't hard enough, he hit the wall. Pain shot through his knuckles and travelled down his arm. It felt good – he knew how to deal with physical pain. He hit again and relished the burn. Then he let his misery turn to anger, pummeling the wall until he couldn't move his arms anymore, his knuckles cracked and bleeding and the wall a mess of broken plaster and dents.  

He slumped back on the bed and rolled on his back, staring at the ceiling. He didn't cry – the tears had been a reaction to hers anyway – but that didn’t do anything for the pain that was threatening to burst his heart. He kept staring at the ceiling, occasionally biting his lips when tears threatened to overflow again.

It wasn't until the early hours of dawn that his weary body gave into the tiredness. He'd been doing too much lately – the exams, the practice, the long night shifts and now, the long, long walk to her dorm and then back home, not bothering with the bike. It was probably still parked there. He'd have…to go… ge..t…i…t…

As his mind began to drift, he felt a surge of warmth inside him – like a comforting pat on the back or a warm hug and all the good things jumbled into one.

 He slept.

……………………..

Kai wasn't sure why he did it. In fact, he was sure he'd regret it but it couldn’t be undone.

It was just that Luhan was so damn miserable, the bastard, that Kai was beginning to feel sad and he didn't like it. Yup, that was it. Kai didn't like feeling sad and Luhan, with his pathetic guilt trips and pathetic painful wailing was making Kai feel like it was his heart that was breaking.

And he hadn’t done anything to deserve that. Just like he hadn't done anything to deserve this whole maturing deal – he should still be a cub, dammit, same as Sehun and Tao! He'd wanted to remain that way, not bothering with the whole first fever and mating crap; that was for elders like Luhan and Suho and the rest. All he wanted to do was dance. Why should he have to suffer?

Because of his Shadow.

And so, there he was, curled up in the corner and trying to stifle any sobs he might accidentally let out because Luhan was sad. It was so damn unfair.

Just like the fact that Mei would never pick him. She'd decided on Luhan long before Kai joined the game. He knew it, deep in his heart and it hurt.

He wasn't a risk taker by nature and he never undertook chances where he wasn't sure of success. He preferred to take his time, calculate his chances and prepare beforehand. But Mei, because of Luhan's feelings and his own sudden transformation, had hit him out of the blue and left him a crazed mess of mood swings and instincts he had no idea how to unleash or satisfy. He just knew that she drove him crazy. And that was the reason he'd finally decided to stop holding himself back. The odds mightn't be in his favor but he'd do his best to change that.

So, no matter how he cut it, his Shadow was responsible for all the recent mess-ups in his life. His studies were being affected, his friendship with Sehun and Tao – although they were almost back to normal now and sometimes, Kai fooled himself into believing that he was still a cub – his heartache and everything else that seemed to be going wrong right now was because of Luhan.

But…

And it was this 'but' that had made him do it, gritting his teeth and firmly trying to restrain himself from giving in.

But when he'd been younger – when they were living on separate planets, with no one but fellow Legends for company – when he'd been feeling sad and lonely and lost, Luhan had comforted him. Even though they were living on separate planets, he'd still comforted him. No matter how miserable he'd felt, he'd known his Shadow would always be there for him. And his stupid conscience had to choose now to wake up and remind him.

Damn it all, he was miserable too. Because of Luhan. Why should he have to comfort him as well???

Despite his mental rant and his abject objection to the idea, he couldn't sleep a wink, marred by guilt and sadness that echoed in his Shadow's heart. Near dawn, he was miserable himself.

I just wanted to dance… he thought as tears filled his eyes, this time entirely his own. Why did this have to happen?

Sniffing, he finally gave in and reached out to Luhan, not sure what to do but wanting to comfort him anyway.

He felt his way along their link – unused, because of their ongoing tussle, it felt fragile but grew stronger as he let his feelings flow. And then, he touched Luhan's soul – or that's what it felt like, anyway. It was like meeting an old friend, a warm pat, a hug and all the good things combined into one giant feel-good thingy.

He felt some of Luhan's pain ease away and his own heart eased as well and he finally gave into sleep.

…………………….