Once I left the school tears kept flowing down my cheeks. The same sentence that I heard in the cafeteria kept repeating in my mind. I knew I was putting myself in deep the moment I said “I DO”. I was at the lose-lose situation when all I did was just helping my parents and also Kai which leave me suffer in this feelings that I have all this while. But I know this is the only way I could help the people around me. I sacrifice every single thing and this is what I get. Yes. For now. Divorce is the only way. I’m fine if I have to pay all the debt and having 3 jobs at a time but I don’t want to suffer like this. This feelings is killing me every single day. Really I am not strong. I am no longer strong. Like I how used to be.

The thoughts that I have quickly brought me home. I change into the most comfortable clothes. OMMA. She is all I need for now. I should just leave my phone here. And yes a note.

If you see this message, I am glad that you are actually looking for me. But don’t worry I will back on my own. Don’t look for me. Don’t wait for me. I just need some fresh air. If I’m not back. This is it. Goodbye Kim Jongin. I REALLY LOVE YOU. IM SORRY.

Your fake wife.

I left the note on my study table and left the house. I still can’t contain the tears and also the disappointment that I was feeling. Finally I am here, standing right in front of my house. The house that I used to stay. The house where I share all the sweet moments with my families and not worrying about this feelings and this arranged marriage. I am only 17. I shall not cry even though this is hard for me to handle. I don’t want omma to worry about my little problem. I am here to help her to solve the problem.

“Omma, I’m here.” I yelled from the moment I entered the house.

“Ya. Jieun ah. Why are you here? Arent you supposed to be in school?” Omma said when she saw me.

“Oh omma, is that how you greet your daughter? Oh omma, you are not working today?” I was actually disappointed with omma.

“Aigoo~ Mianhae Jieun ah. Oh my employer allow me to leave earlier, since I have not much thing to do. And I asked you a question and you asked me back.” Omma pinched my cheek as she apologized.

“Oh omma, I had a stomach ache just now so I left the school earlier and then I was alone at home, and I miss you soo much. Don’t you miss me? Okay I’ll go.” I told her and stood up from the kitchen counter but my wrist was caught by omma.

“Ya. Jieun ah I was just joking. Does Jongin know that you are coming here?” I went silent for a while when Omma asked me.

“Oh….D-don’t worry omma, I-I already told Kai I am… coming home.” I stuttered. I stayed there for almost 2 hours. I spent the 2 hours wisely with Omma. Helped her out with the cleaning. Asked her about her work. She even asked me about my marriage but of course I won’t say a word about it.

“Omma, I’m going home. Kai will start to get worried if I don’t get home even though I already told him.” I told Omma, so that she won’t suspect anything suspicious. OR ELSE…..

“Are you going home? So fast?” Omma asked.

“Ne, omma. See you next time.” I told her.

“Take care. If you have problem, don’t keep to yourself. We have burdened you much with this marriage, so don’t think that you are troubling us with the problems that you are facing.” Omma hugged me as she said that. How could I tell her even though she already said that? I don’t want her to feel guilty for marrying me off to Kai. It feels like as if she knows what is troubling me now. Mother’s instinct. Tears starts to form. Yes, I am no longer as strong as before.

“If you don’t want to tell me what happened. I hope this hug can help you to feel calm. Omma know that you are having problems right now. I’m sorry if I brought you into this. I know my Lee Jieun can face this. Where is my strong Lee Jieun who will never give up even she face the toughest test in life?” Omma start to comfort me who was starting to cry out loud. I quickly break the hug and wiped the tears.

“Omma. Thank you. Don’t worry. Don’t feel guilty. I was the one who agreed to this. I hope everything will be okay. Omma, you trust me right? You know what is the best for me right? No matter what happens after this, please don’t blame anybody. It’s just me.” I told her as tears still flowing down my red cheeks.

“Jieun ah. Please don’t do anything dumb. I trust you. I love you.” Omma kissed my forehead.

“Bye omma. I’ll go first. I love you too omma.” I hug her and went off. I can’t go back since Kai will probably be at home. I really don’t know where to go. I was walking around the neighbourhood when I saw the park where I used to hang out whenever I have problems. I know I should stay here until I feel that I am ready to face him again.

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(Kai P.O.V)

Class just ended. I quickly grabbed my bag and ran to her class. Every minute is precious. I realized my mistake and I really hope I can change everything back to how it used to be. Jieun ah mianhae.

“Oh annyeong, may I know where is Jieun?” I asked one of her classmates. They looked at each other, confused.

“Oh, Kai. She already went home. She even came into the class late. She said she have diarrhea and she asked for permission to go home early. So after lunch, she went back home.” One of her classmate explained to me