When Soojung closes her eyes, she’s filled with memories. She sees the boy with messy, dark hair and sleepy, innocent eyes. She sees herself, smiling at every move of the boy.

The memories change. Sometimes they’re of a great, big house by the beach with a balcony where she and the boy used to sit under. Sometimes, they’re of a rooftop greenhouse where she and the boy have picnics and dance when no one is watching.

It’s always the same boy with messy, dark hair and the sleepy, innocent eyes. He always smiles at her. He has dark skin and soft, plump lips. He wears jeans and t-shirts most of the times.

She’s always smiling, too. Laughing and giggling at things the boy says. She’s always in his arms or walking beside him. She’s always carefree and happy.

But she doesn’t remember any of this because these aren’t her memories. She doesn’t know the boy’s name or where he’s from. She doesn’t even know if he exists. She also doesn’t know the girl that looks like her, because she’s not happy and smiling.

And when she opens her eyes, all she sees is white. She’s in the hospital bed, all the time, not able to move because of the heavy braces on her legs and arms. Her heart fails sometimes, and she can’t speak, and she doesn’t think she’s beautiful like the girl in her head.

So, when she’s exhausted from the drugs and the pain and the misery, she closes her eyes again. There, she sees the boy with messy, dark hair and the sleepy, innocent eyes. There, she sees herself smiling and beautiful. There, she feels his lips over hers, soft and light and just right. There, she’s happy.

And when she opens her eyes again, she doesn’t think she’s dreaming, because she sees the white washed walls of her hospital room, but she doesn’t think she’s awake because the boy with messy, dark, hair and the sleepy, innocent eyes is there. He’s there in jeans and a t-shirt and with tears streaking down his cheeks. He’s not smiling like in her head, but he’s there. And she doesn’t know what to do because she’s not smiling and beautiful like the girl in her head.

Because the boy with messy, dark hair and the sleepy, innocent eyes doesn’t have a name. Because she doesn’t remember. Because those aren’t her memories.

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Wow, guys! Long time no see!
I guess I have to first appologize for being so MIA these past few weeks....months! It's been quite hectic. I'm busy with applying to colleges, keeping my grades up, and other extracurricular activities and such, and I just haven't been able to find the time to write! But! Alas (EHEU!-those of you who've taken Latin will know), I'm back with this...very kind of sad and angsty drabble. Yea...a few months of being MIA and I'm giving you guys something sad...hrm... Well, I'm sorry about that, but this was just something I've been wanting to write.

It's based on the song Spotless Mind by Jung Joon Young. He's currently on the show We Got Married with actress Jung Yoo Mi (Good Doctor), and they are adorable! But that's not the point. The song is actually about a guy who I guess got inot an accident of some sort(?) and lost his memories of this girl that he loved. I'm guessing they split. But in the song he says things like "It's a disease, I'm a patient" which led me to put Soojung into a hospital, probably in the intensive care unit. He also says "I don't remember, I don't know, if we were in love." WIth those lyrics I kind of twisted and made it so that Soojung, while she still has memories of her a Jongin's good times, she doesn't remember him, and therefore thinks he's just a creation of her mind. There's also the part in the story where Jongin shows up at her hostipal room with tears staining his cheeks. That comes directly from the lyrics in which Jung Joon Young states, "Who are you to me, that you're standing in front of me, crying."

Again, I'm so sorry for the lack in updates and the sad drabble, but I will be back. Soon...maybe...hopefully. Especailly around Thanksgiving and Christmas time! ^^
Thanks for reading and sticking around and loving these drabbles and Kaistal guys!

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Thanks for reading! ^^