CHAPTER 64

He drinks the Soju(distilled beverage in Korea) and swallowed.

He drank a lot of Soju. He’s trying to cover the pain through the alcohol that he drinks. He thought “The alcohol that I’m drinking clears my throat but it never touches my heart…I may have forgotten something after I got myself wasted….but it won’t heal anything after. I’m living in my body but my heart feels dead…It’s not easy……Call me a fool but haven’t you realized how painful it is for me too? You’ll be able to forget me when time passed by…I gave way, I let go…and that makes it harder for me to accept that I wasn’t able to do a thing…Because I value you both…I didn’t choose anyone…that’s why I ended up hurting myself. I sacrificed enough…………..Now, live in happiness……without me.” 


He drinks continuously. He’s definitely getting himself drunk tonight. He remembers Dara’s face and everything about her and so he shed tears again without anyone seeing.
In an empty street, he’s sitting alone and sobbing with a broken heart. 
He thought “In everything that I do…I’m always the one who ends up being hurt. Am I really meant to be in pain every time? I always make stupid decisions. Damn, when will my heart learn to make something right? I am stupid…I am stupid.” –Aww =( He’s blaming his self for everything.


On the other side…

Dara was still crying on the Han River. It’s already 10 PM. She’s not yet going home so 2NE1 became worried. 
2NE1 is at their dorm and Dara is still not.

CL said “Where’s Dara unnie? She’s not yet going home.”
Minzy said “Did you call her already?”
Bom said “I’ve been calling her, but she’s not answering~ Aigoo. Where could that girl be?”
CL said “Should we all go out to find her?”


-GD at the dimmed street-

He already stopped crying but he’s not yet out of the mood of loneliness. He already drank 3 bottles of Soju. He’s staring on the floor because he doesn’t want to look up and see the sky because it will just remind him of her, the way they look at it together every night when they’re together.

And then, while the surroundings around him are silent…

A voice called him…

“Jiyong?”



-Dara who’s sitting near the Han River-

“Dara!” –someone called her from afar.

She glanced from where the voice came from and saw that it was Bom.
Bom said “Omo. What happened to your eyes?” – because it looks swollen.
Dara covered her face and said with a happy voice, “Oh Bommie-ah! Why are you here?”
“We’re looking for you since lately, you didn’t eat with us on the cafeteria. Actually, we’re planning to go here all together but I decided to come with myself only.”
“You’re looking for me? Really? *chuckles*” –acting happy, she’s still covering her face and not looking at her while talking.
Bom walked closer, she said “Aish. Dara, take that off your face, tell me, what’s your problem?”
“Ne? Wah. Aigoo. Don’t go closer~”
“Why? What really happened? Are you crying?”
“I’m not. Hehe~~”
“Then why are you covering your face?”
“It’s windy, I’m afraid that dust will get in my eyes.”
Bom looks around and said “There’s no way that it’s windy tonight~ Dara-yah! Did you cry?” –she sits and takes her hands off her face but Dara moves away and doesn’t want to show her face still.
“No. I look ugly~”
“Ya. Dara-yah. Don’t be shy to me. We’re Park sisters, right?”

5 seconds have passed…

“Bommie-ah…” –she said with a lonely voice and slowly removes her hands on her face.
Bom saw her swollen eyes. She said “I knew you cried. What’s the reason?”
“I just don’t…I don’t want to recall.” –her voice and reaction was like she was about to cry again.
“Ani~ Ani~ don’t cry again. It’s okay Dara…”
“It hurts Bommie-ah.” She tears up again.
“I think in your situation, you should let it out first. It still hurts, right? Cry all you want tonight, tomorrow, the pain will get lesser.” Aww.
“I don’t know, I feel like my world is going to end tonight! T_T”
“Who hurts you? Let’s kick that person!” –she said with a funny accent.
But Dara is still crying…again.
Bom said “What really happened?”
“When I say this to you…I hope it won’t leave from the walls of our dorm.”
“2NE1 will keep it a secret for you Dara! ^^”
“I was confused…Me and Jiyong… we’re going out the whole week, together, he did some sweet things and said that he loves me… but lately……he took back everything he said and he said that everything that he did was not true either!” –she cried again.
Bom wasn’t able to say a thing after she heard that it was because of GD that’s why Dara was crying.
Dara said while she’s crying really hard, “He even told me to forget him! I don’t get it, why does he have to do all of it if he’ll let me forget him after?! Why does he have to say that he loves me if he’ll take it back after?”
Bom holds her shoulder and said “Stand up.”
“Waeyo?!” She’s still crying.
“Stand up Dara.” –she lifted her up. Dara stands up.
Bom pulled her to stand in front of the river. She said “Here. Let it out here. Shout it all!”
Dara looked at her and said “What?”
Bom smiled at her and said “Go on~ Shout everything inside you. Let it out! It will help you to release a little bit of pain.” –Aww 

Dara stared at the river first then their memories in that place flashbacks on her mind. Now the pain is all inside her, she started to shout…
“I hate you!!!”

Bom is not speaking and just listening to her.

She’s while shouting, “Why did you have to do that?!! Tell me, that there’s even a single thing that’s real from this week! Tell me that you do love me!! If you really love me, why do you have to hurt me like this?! *sobs* Why do you have to make me fall in love with you more if you’ll end it up this way!? I hate you for hurting me and pushing me away from you! Why?! It hurts Jiyoooong!! It hurts! Do you know how it feels to be left like this! I thought you can’t leave me?! You’re a liar! Liiiaaaarr! I hate you!! I hate you! I hate you….. I hate…myself. Why am I so blind that I wasn’t able to see that? You fooled me! You hurt me! You left me!”
-she continued crying after. Maybe she wasn’t able to say more words anymore.

So Bom came into her and hugged her. 
She said “It’s okay Dara…you made it. Later, it will feel better.”
Dara can’t talk.
Bom said “Did he really hurt you like that?! How could he do that?! I can’t believe he did that. GD is not a bad guy as I’ve known him even before…”
She continued, “That is questionable. Why would he do that to you?” –she wonders.
Bom is comforting Dara by tapping her back and hugging her. She waits until Dara stops crying. Aww. Park sisters~

When Dara stopped crying, she said “Oh. Did you bring your phone with you?”
“Ne! ^^ I was calling you the whole time but you’re not answering.”
“I can’t talk that time. By the way, can I have it? *sniffs*”
Bom gave it to her. Dara used the screen of her phone as a mirror. She laughed when she saw her face. She said “Kyaha! I looked like a Chinese now~”
Bom laughed and said “Ne. #%&%^*&^@#.” –she talked an unknown language.
Dara laughed at her expression too. She said “Aigoo~ that sounds awful!”
Then they laughed together.
Dara looked at herself again on Bom’s phone and said “I think I just got Minzy’s eyes tonight.” –trying to insult their maknae because Minzy really got slanted eyes.
Bom and Dara laughed again. 
Bom said “Oh. Dara unnie~ Are you going to sleep now?” –she imitates the way Minzy talks.
Dara laughed again. Bom said “Dara-yah! CL and Minzy are worried about you now, let’s go home.”
“With Minzy’s eyes?” –Hahaha. She’s just fooling around.
Bom slaps her shoulder and said “Aigoo, you’re!” –haha. Saying that she’s getting too much for insulting Minzy’s eyes…
Dara immediately said “I mean, with these eyes?”
“Come on, I’ll buy you an ice pack ^^ Put it on and it will help it remove inflammations ^^ Just like your swollen eyes tonight!”
“Oh. Thank you so much Bommie, I don’t know how to thank you for tonight but----”
Bom pulled her and said “Aiing. Shut up, you’re already welcome and you know that! Let’s just buy and go home, okay?”
“Okay! ^^” –she gets a little bit well.

Bom was the one who’s with Dara now………then who’s with GD? Who called him lately?


-Back to GD…-

[Background Music: Foolish Love by Big Bang]

As he heard the voice, he looks at that person’s feet first because he’s staring at the ground lately, then he slowly looked up and saw…………… that it was Jin-ah. Waaaa!

He’s dizzy because he got drunk. His eyes looked like half closed. 
He didn’t speak.

Jin-ah said “Why are you here? What are you doing? You’re drinking again?!”
“How did you find me here?”
“I was passing by this street.”
He’s really serious. He said “It’s late at night, why are you still around?”
“I came from work.”
“Go home now.”
“What are you doing to yourself?”
“Am I doing something?”
“Look around you, you already drank a lot!” She saw the bottles beside him.
GD crooked a smile. Jin-ah said “Do you have a problem?”
GD looked at her and said “Even if I have…you can’t do something about it.”
“What is it?”
“I can’t tell it.”


--------SILENCE---------


“Ya. Why are you still here?” –Jiyong said with a calm voice.
“Haven’t I told you that I’m just here whenever you need me?”
“Ahh...that one.”
“That’s the last time we saw each other, on the parking lot, remember? …….By the way…I came and watched your concert.”
“Really?”
“Ne. It was great!”
GD forced a smile.
“GD… I really wanted to help you, I know you have something to share to me, I’m here to comfort you.”
“I can’t explain my situation right now.”
“I’ll wait for you to open up.”
“You know…this is kind of silly, why will I open up? ……to you?” –Aw. That hurts for Jin-ah.
“I just wanted to be close to you again. Can’t that happen anymore?”
“It’s hard to bring the trust back once it’s broken.”
“Jiyong, I just want to fix everything between us. Let’s not be this awkward.”
“No, We’re not bringing that back now, Jin-ah.”
“I want us to be back to normal. Why are you being like this to me now?”
“I have a lot of problems. Don’t dare to be one of it.”
“I don’t want to change something about us, like we were before.”
“How could you say that in front of me? Did you know how it feels before when you said that I should find another woman and forget you? Did you know how it feels being pushed away? You chose your career over me, right? You’re with someone else already… you were with another guy’s arms, when he left you, you’re now alone then you’ll come looking for me a year or years after?! I’m not a game Jin-ah, that if you lost me, you’ll come and play me again! It’s over Jin-ah…It’s…game over.” –Aww! He got the same condition with Dara now.
“I know I’m wrong! But I just want----”
“I’m hurt Jin-ah! And I have somebody else in my heart already…but I’m in pain now.” –his eyes were swarming with tears. Aw! He has a lot to think about. They’re already three, Taeyang, Dara and Jin-ah! He must be in the worst situation tonight! =(

“Jiyong… I thought we can still be friends?”

-FLASHBACK:-

…And J-ah smiled and said "Be friends instead?"
"Yeah." -he smiled.

(cut from Chapter 21) –it’s after YG went to a restaurant, after Dara and GD hugged, when GD is on his way home with an earphones in his ears and he saw his ex. They said it after they hugged… their last hug.

-END OF FLASHBACK-


Jiyong was paused to that. He didn’t reply.
J-ah said “You’re hurt, right? You need someone.” –she sits beside him.
She puts the bottles down on the floor and said “Don’t drink again.”
GD got silenced. J-ah said “Come on, I know you’re having a hard time, I’m here for you as a friend…”

GD is not talking still… He frowned…then he felt all the pain coming to his heart that time, he thinks that he cannot keep it to himself any longer.

So tears fell down his face again… J-ah noticed that. He stooped his head, so he won’t be seen too much that he’s crying.
J-ah said “It’s okay to cry Jiyong.”

GD finally speaks, “I am hurt so bad…and I hurt someone so bad too…I don’t know what to do. I want to kill myself! I like to end my life tonight…… I like to…escape from the pain.” –Aw! =((
J-ah said “Jiyong, don’t end everything when you just started, problems are made to be solved…and wounds are made to be washed…sooner or later….it will be over, it will heal.”
GD looked at her. J-ah smiled and said “Right?”
He looked away then wiped his tears. He thought “I’m feeling the same pain like before again… Why do problems bother me at the same time tonight? Why does she need to be here with me? Why her? The one who hurt me before…Yes, I don’t care about her now anymore, but there’s still the feeling…the feeling that she gave me before…”  =(
He thought again “I cannot stand this.”
Jiyong said “I…I need to go.” –he stood up and tried to walk even though he’s really feeling dizzy that time.
He staggered and fell down. Aw. He cannot walk straight already.
J-ah was shocked so she runs towards him and assisted him to stand up. She said “Look! What you did to yourself! Stand up, where do you think you’re going?”
“Far away! From everyone!” –Aww.
“Jiyong, you’re punishing yourself.”
“Yes because I deserve it!”
“You don’t…You don’t…”
GD looked at her and she also looked at him. J-ah got his arms around GD’s back because she’s assisting him in case he falls down again. Now they’re very close to each other and their faces were near too.


-On 2NE1’s dorm-

Bom and Dara just came back. Dara got her eyes back to normal already. She was smiling and trying to hide her sadness in front of the girls. Bom said “We’re here! ^^”
CL and Minzy hurriedly run to the door. CL said “Dara! You’re already here! Where did you come from?”
Dara looked at Bom and she was like, asking for help. She cannot think of any reason.
So Bom saw that look and she said “I saw her shopping for foods on the grocery store!”
“Really?” –CL said then sighed in relief.
Minzy said “Where are the foods?”
Bom and Dara looked at each other again. Bom said “Ayy~ we ate it on our way!”
Dara said “Ne! Sorry if we weren’t able to give some to the both of you. We don’t