Batch Three Review
My Sister is A Cinderella by iedanoeonline

Story Title: My Sister is A Cinderella

Author: iedanoeonline

Story Summary: 
She believes in reality, not fantasy. She always thought that Cinderella is just a crap. She believed, if you really want a happy ending, you have to work hard for it, don't whine, just work!

Reviewer: TangledLove

 

 

Title (8/10)

First off, your title is really interesting. It makes me curious about the story since the main character, Hana, is not Cinderella but her sister is.Also it gives out angst vibe. First I thought the story might be boring since it's like about Cinderella and when I read the description and story, it's awesome. I must say it's a smart decision of yours but I minus some points because the title is incorrect. It should be "My Sister is Cinderella" since Cinderella is Proper Noun (Name) and Proper Nouns don't need article.

 

Foreword and Description (9/10)

Your description is short which I like. It doesn't tell me the whole plot for the entire story. Since it is direct and to the point, readers are curious and thus motivated to read your story.It actually makes me want to read the story after I read the description.

 

Characterization(6/10)

Add more character's body language, thoughts, and emotions. It will  improve your writing. Your story is angst, so you need to be more descriptive about