How life and fate can be so cruel sometimes..

How things ended up the way you never imagined them to be..

Its hard..

Yes..

But you need to keep fighting..

For the one you love and for the ones youve lost..

It has always been like that for me..

A war.. That was my everyday living looks like.. survival of the fittest.. The strong ones gets to live while the weak ones, well they never get to see the next sunrise..

Air had been very precious nowadays.. And Im thankful that I still get to breathe life though I know its impermanent.. No one knows what could happen next.. I maybe living today but I can be dead tomorrow..

And when youre inches away from death.. thats when you contemplate how your life had been.. Have you been good? Have you helped others? Have you achieved your dreams? Have you made a difference? Or have you been one single organism who had lived and died without no one knowing you existed?

For me.. I know I have changed one life aside from mine.. I helped many.. I made a difference even it was just by a bit and I know I have achieved one of my dreams, atleast I know I have..

Im Cpl Amber J Liu of 210th Fires Brigade of the 2nd Infantry Division based in Yongsan and currently taking up my reenlistment procedures after being transferred here three years ago.. 

I know.. What can a woman do in the battle field you ask? Its not gender who dictates who to be in the field and in the office.. Stereotyping was over years ago back in my homeland but here in Korea, there's still some who thinks men is superior with women thats why I needed to prove myself around all these stinky man that Im equally efficient as them.. I am physically strong and has a witty brain probably smarter than some of these dickheads.. And I make sure that no one messes with me just because Im a girl.. Im tougher than what I look like.. Thats what Ive been trying to make everyone see.. Too bad some was just born with airheads.. Naturally inborn idiots.. And they kept looking for something can permanently pull me down.. Envious I guess.. That I get to my own position without help from no one inside the camp.. And still climbing up. Ive been taking up some classes for a higher rank.

Everything seems fine, you could say that.. Im a hardworking army personnel whose striving for a better world.. But thins changed when I met her.. Krystal Jung.. The town Mayor's daughter. It was a love at first sight.. And it was more than perfect when she confessed that she feels the same way.. I needed to get through holes and holes of pins just to get her parents to say yes to our forbidden relationship..

Im in the Army and homouality is greatly prohibited.. I will be dishonorably discharged once someone in the army finds out. I'll be thrown back to US without any benefits for the years I have served in the Army and that will totally leave me broke.. 

"Im willing to give up my dreams sir if that will mean I can spend the rest of my life with your daughter." That's what I told Krystal's dad when we decided to come clean after her caught us with hisown eyes kissing at their backyard one evening..

He called me names.. Insanely crazy.. Stupid.. Immoral.. and even threatened to kill me but I stand my ground.. Im not yet ready to lose Krystal..

 I have never been ready to lose Krystal.. And I aint gonna start now..

I held the locket necklace Krystal gave to me when I went to my duty that day.. We were on our code red and all army personnel, reserved and on leave, was called for duty. I still dont know the situation that time.. If only I know.. I wouldve stayed beside her.. I wouldnt have left..

Krystal handed the locket to me and kissed me before I go.. That was the last time I saw her smiling face, though there was a hint of worry on it, but her warm smile made it seem that everything is alright so I head out of their house with a promise that..

"I'll come back for you..Wait for me.."