53 Envy
So Sweet, So Simple
[Sora's POV]
"How do you feel now?" Gikwang asks me with great concern.
"I'm fine," I answer him simply.
We are on our way back to the apartment from their comeback performance. I do feel so much better after taking some rests yesterday. My fever went down and the headache has disappeared already.
"Mina didn't come to find us today," Dongwoon mumbles. "I wonder why."
"What?" Hyunseung teases him. "Is our Dongwoon falling for Mina?"
"N-no!" Dongwoon tries to explain. "It's not like that."
While they are teasing Dongwoon, I'm deep in my own thoughts. Dongwoon is right; Mina didn't pay a visit for BEAST today. I didn't even see her in the audience seat today. Is she feeling guilty because of what happened yesterday?
Hmph, no, Mina won't do that.
I look out through the window, remembering about what happened yesterday. I remember that I fell asleep with Yoseob next to me, holding my hand until I woke up because of Gikwang's phone call.
Was I hallucinating when I heard Yoseob said, "I love you" yesterday?
Well, there is no way I will ask him about what he said to me yesterday. I better keep silence.
Ah, there is a phone call. I take out my phone from my pocket and freeze when I see the caller's ID.
It's my sister.
[Gikwang's POV]
"Where are you going, Sora?" Yoseob asks her when she doesn't follow us to the elevator.
"I need to meet Mina," she answers without changing her expression.
Mina? Again?
"I'm going with you," Yoseob walks to her. "You're going back with me after Mina is done with you."
"You need to prepare your song for Immortal Song 2," Doojoon says to Yoseob. He's right, Yoseob hasn't practiced his song for the first episode of Immortal Song 2.
I can see Yoseob is clenching his fists; he really wants to go with Sora. I know what he's feeling; worrying about someone you love is an ordinary thing.
"I'll go with her then," I pat Yoseob's back. "I'll make sure she will go back as soon as possible."
Yoseob frowns. He looks hesitated for seconds but then he smiles, "Take care of her."
I smile back at him and turn to look at Sora, "Come on."
Sora bows to the others and then walks away. I don't even ask her where we're going; I just follow her silently. She stops a taxi and gets inside.
"Is everything alright?" I finally speak out. Sora just told the driver to drive us to an address she read from her phone.
"My sister called me," Sora answers, looking out through the window. "She said my mother is really mad at me because I didn't help Mina yesterday. My mother told me that she would take the flight from Paris tomorrow morning if I don't meet Mina as soon as possible."
"Why would your mother be mad at you because of Mina?" I frown. There is definitely something wrong here.
"Because Mina's father died because of my mother," she answers, giving me a surprise.
She turns and looks at me directly, still having her expressionless face, "Mina's father saved my mother from an accident seven years ago. Since that day, Mina lives with my parents because her mother is at the mental hospital. Her mother can't bear the fact that her husband has deceased."
I don't know what to say.
[Sora's POV]
I know the fact from my sister. My mother told my sister to take care of Mina since that day. My mother feels really guilty because of what happened; that's why she really cares about Mina.
I know this all along but I try to ignore the fact. They never care much about me either, so it won't make any differences, whether it's true or not.
Gikwang gives me a very shocked expression. He rubs his head, trying to find words to say.
I sigh, "Don't pity me. I'm alright. I just need to take care of Mina for now."
"Are we going to her house?" Gikwang mutters.
I nod, "She is going to move to our apartment soon. She asked me to help her with her stuff before so I know where her house is."
No one talks anymore until the taxi stops at the address I asked. We step out from the taxi and walk to the small house in the corner of the street.
It's strange; the door is not locked. I open the door slowly and find out that the house is really messed up, as if someone just robbed this house. I step inside and try to find Mina with Gikwang follows me behind.
"Mina?" I call out her name when I find her room. She is living all by herself when she's at South Korea. My mother hired some maids to clean up after the house though.
I exchange looks at Gikwang and he nods, giving me a sign to open the door.
I open the door and surprises when there are some flashes of cameras showering me and Gikwang from inside of the room. I try to block the flashes with my hands.
"Gotcha!" I hear Mina's voice.
The flashes have stopped and I can see what's inside of her room.
Mina is sitting on her bed and there are a girl with ponytail and two other boys. Each of them is holding a digital camera; they just took pictures of me and Gikwang.
"You're right," the girl mutters. "They come together!"
"These pictures will make a hot issue!" one of the boys whistles happily. "Gikwang the idol and a professional photographer."
I glare at Mina. She is laughing along with her friends. What is she thinking?
"You know," Mina looks at me with a smile on her lips, "I know you and Gikwang Oppa do have an interesting relationship."
"What are you talking?" I clench my fists, trying to keep calm.
"Don't play dumb," Mina laughs. "I, one of B2UTIES, surely know about the photo of you and Gikwang that has spreaded around the netizens three months ago."
That old issue. Why does she bring this up?
Gikwang doesn't say anything. I guess he is just too confused with Mina's behavior.
"What do you think if I attach this picture along with a tweet, 'Gikwang BEAST is having a scandal with BEAST personal photographer'?" Mina's smile has turned into a smirk.
"What is your intention?" I ask her.
"Ah, or maybe 'Gikwang BEAST is dating personally BEAST personal photographer'? Which one is better?" she asks again as if she doesn't listen to my question.
"Wait a minute," Gikwang tries to step forward but I stop him. I pull his shirt, trying to make sure he won't take any step forward.
"Put the cameras and leave," Mina instructs her friends. "I want to talk alone with my lovely cousin."
Her friends do what she said. They put their cameras on her bed and leave the room, flashing both of me and Gikwang devil smirks.
"I envy you, Sora Unnie," Mina kneels on the bed. "You're pretty. You're a professional photographer. You're close with BEAST. You're talented."
I frown. What is she trying to say?
"Why do you always deserve better than me?" a tear rolls down on her cheek.
[Gikwang's POV]
Is Mina jealous with Sora?
"Why do you always deserve better than me?" I look at Mina; she is crying now. She is crying for real.
I feel deja vu.
"My sister is so lucky. She always deserve better than me."
Sora said that to me before. How come Mina thinks that Sora is better than her?
"You have your talent. You have a loving sister. You have parents," Mina sobs. "What do I have?"
"Mina, listen," Sora tries to calm down her but Mina closes her ears with both of her hands.
"I hate all of my friends. They want me to introduce you to them. I have enough. Why don't they see my talent? Why don't they want me?!" she screams with frustration.
Sora rushes to her and, even I'm shocked, slaps her on her face.
"Stop being childish," Sora says with monotone. "Complaining doesn't change anything."
"How dare you slap me?!" Mina shouts angrily.
She is going to slap Sora back so I run to Sora and pull her away. I hug her tighter, not letting Mina to harm her.
"Why?" Mina is still crying. "How come everybody loves you and not me? I'm trying to be cheerful. I'm trying to be cute. I'm trying to be a happy-go-lucky person. And what do I get?!"
"We all have our ups and downs," I speak out. "I know how you feel. I felt that before. To see someone who is shining brighter than you. To look up at someone who has everything you don't have. I know."
Mina looks at me with teary eyes. Sora doesn't move in my hug.
"But I tried. I tried to be what I want to be. And here I am," I continue. "I know now that it's not easy to be a successful person. It's hard. Sora doesn't receive her success without effort. She is doing her best with what she has. That's all."
[Sora's POV]
I look at Gikwang's face. He is looking at Mina while putting his arm on my shoulder. I don't know he could say things like that.
"Don't envy Sora," Gikwang says. "Be proud of her and show us that you have your own talent."
I squeeze Gikwang's shirt, making him to look at me. I flash him a smile and then turn to Mina, "I'm not going to lecture you. You are yourself and I am myself."
I step closer to her; she is still sobbing uncontrollably.
"You are a good photographer," I say the truth. "I know it from your photographs."
"Don't you dare try to cheer me up," she growls.
"I never compliment people if they don't deserve my compliments," I mutter.
She looks at me, biting her bottom lip as if she doesn't believe what I said.
"My parents love you more than they love me. They love my sister more than they love me. That's why I'm trying to be myself," I finish my words.
I walk to the door, ready to leave.
"I'm not living the perfect life you're thinking about me," I say without looking back at her. "I should be the one who envy you."
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