40 Mistake
So Sweet, So Simple
[Gikwang's POV]
"Last song in a minute," Hyunseung tells us. There is a notification on the screen, telling us we only have less than 3 minutes now. It's almost 11 PM now.
Sora has picked a song to sing as the last song. Junhyung demanded her to do a solo because we sang more often than her and, thankfully, she didn't refuse.
My mind is still wondering when Sora stands up and picks up the microphone. My uneasy feeling keeps growing inside of me, especially when I remember how Yoseob looked at her when they sang My Boo together.
The refrain lyrics are just so... I don't know how to explain it. The way Yoseob looked at her. The way Sora looked at him. As if they're connected with each other.
"Now another brother's taken over but it's still in your eyes, my boo"
That line keeps lingering in my mind. I know it's just a part of the lyrics but the way Yoseob sang it, as if he was trying to say something to Sora, to me, to us.
"Why don't you pick Gee?" Dongwoon asks Sora when she prepares to sing the last song.
"Because I prefer ballad," she answers.
[Sora's POV]
I don't fit into a cute song like Gee but I did pick one of SNSD's songs. Mistake is a ballad and it's a really sad song.
I look at Gikwang. He is spacing out. He's been doing it since I've finished my duet with Yoseob. I feel guilty now.
Even though it's only a deal but I know I'm Gikwang's girlfriend for this moment. I make myself clear enough: Yoseob is treating me as his little sister and Gikwang loves me truly.
I take a deep breath and looks at the screen.
The song has starts.
"Nan ajig jejarijyo
Yeojeonhi geudae gyeoteseo hemaeida jichyeoseo"
Oneuldo geudaer maemdolda
Haru tto haru heulleo heulleoseo
Yeogikkaji ongeojyo"
I’m still at the same place
Weary from wandering by your side
As I wander in circles, day have passed
And I find myself at this place
[Yoseob's POV]
Mistake by SNSD.
She picked a ballad song. She is doing good with the song. I close my eyes, listening to her voice,
"Almyeonse apeun nae mam almyeonseodo
Utneun geudaega nar deo apeuge hajyo"
You know, You know that my heart is hurting
Watching you smile makes my heart ache more
I open my eyes, looking at her. Sora is singing along with the lyrics. My eyes move and I find Gikwang is looking at her as well. Gikwang looks at her with gentle eyes, dazzled by her voice, just like me.
"Nareul deo saranghage mandeulji mothan nae jalmoshijyo
Naega deo saranghaeseo mandeureobeorin nae jalmoshijyo
Nae maeummankeum narreur deo saranghage haji mot haesseotdeon geoyeotjyo nae jalmoshijyo"
It’s my mistake for not making you love me more
It’s my mistake for loving you more than you love me
It’s my mistake for not making you love me as much as I wanted you to
My heart skips a beat when I hear the refrain part. I look at Sora deeply.
How can I tell her that I love her?
How can I tell her that I love her?
[Gikwang's POV]
For someone who is not working as a singer, Sora does a great job with singing this song. She is trying her best, trying to get the perfect emotion to this song.
I pick a microphone and sing the next lines, making her stops her from singing and looks at me,
"Eolmana deo manheun siganeul nunmureul heullyeo yahanayo geu yaksokmaneul mideumyeo
Gidaryeo dalladeon geojitmal
Ije sogatdeon nae yoksimdo jichyeo beorigo mangeojyo"
How much longer must I cry as I trust in that promise
You lied to me to wait for you
Even my greed for your love has grown weary
I don't mean the lyrics for her but it feels hurt when I sing the part. Please, don't make those words come true.
A voice stops me; Yoseob is singing the next lines. I look at him and he already stood up, holding a microphone and closing his eyes,
"Almyeonseo apeun naemamda almyeonseo
Geureohge moreun cheog useulsun eoptjanhayo"
You know, you know that my heart is aching
How can you play dumb and smile like that?
I look at Sora and give her a smile. We sing the refrain part together with Yoseob's voice along with our lines,
"Nareul deo saranghage mandeulji mothan nae jalmoshijyo
Naega deo saranghaeseo mandeureobeorin nae jalmoshijyo
Nae maeummankeum narreur deo saranghage haji mot haesseotdeon geoyeotjyo nae jalmoshijyo"
It’s my mistake for not making you love me more
It’s my mistake for loving you more than you love me
It’s my mistake for not making you love me as much as I wanted you to
There it goes. My heart is aching again.
[Yoseob's POV]
Gikwang's expression has changed. I know Sora picked this song randomly, just because she likes this song, but looks like this song does affect us a lot now. It's kind of difficult for me to sing this song since it's originally sang by girls but I try my best.
The other members are moving with the rythm; they don't realize the changing atmosphere around three of us.
Gikwang sings a line, which is I think really hurting him for the reason I don't know, because he closes his eyes now and not letting a smile slips out from his lips,
"Gajilsu eoptneungeor almyeonseo"
I knew I couldn’t have you
Sora sings the next line, looking at Gikwang now,
"Meotdaero keojin nae maeumi"
But my love for you just kept growing
I close my eyes, thinking of Sora in my mind,
"Honjaseo gidaridaga
Honjaseo huhoehadaga
Saranghan geotdo jalmosineyo"
It’s my mistake for waiting by myself
Regretting by myself
Loving you by myself
Three of us sing the last refrain. No one is looking at each other now; we're looking straight to the screen, singing every words with emotion filling our mind,
"Apeunjul almyeonseodo itjireur mothan nae jalmoshijyo
(Naega cham babo gatjyo)
Dachir kkeol almyeonseodo biuji mothan nae jalmoshijyo
Modeun ge nae tasiradeo (Modeun ge nae tasiradeo)
Geurado gwaenchanhayo geudaeman itdamyeon"
Even though my heart was aching, it’s my mistake for not letting you go
(I’m such a fool)
I knew I would get hurt and couldn’t let go, it’s my mistake
Even though it's all my fault (Even though it's all my fault)
That’s okay as long as you’re there
Gikwang sings a word, taking a glance at Sora,
"Eonjekkajina"
Always
Sora puts down her microphone. I finishes the song with the last line; the last line which I want to say to Sora right now,
"Ireonnal yongseohaejwoyo geudael saranghan nal"
Please forgive me, who loved you, for being like this
The song has finished. The screen has gone black.
[Sora's POV]
There is silence awkward between me and Gikwang. We have returned to our apartment and he said he want to talk with me.
And here we are. Standing in front of my door.
Since the last song, he hasn't said anything. Dongwoon told me that he's tired but I don't think so.
"You need to take a rest," I touch his cheek softly. He does look sleepy though.
He holds my hand, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. He steps closer to me and he puts his head on my shoulder.
"I'm sorry," he mutters.
"For what?" I frown.
"For loving you," he murmurs.
Why is he apologizing?
He straighten up his body and caresses my cheek. My heart is beating faster now. What's with that sad expression?
He blurts out a question, making my heart feels like it stops beating for a second.
"Can I kiss you?"
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