"Colors of The Season"

By: Shawolverse

Reviewer: St-renaissance.

1-Title: "Colors of The Season" sounds like a suitable title for a lighthearted story, perhaps one that revolves around a personal development synced with environmental display of emotions. It's not entirely creative or original, I've come across several stories with similar titles and familiar vibes. Since it's a very short stories, I don't recommend that you change it or add a sub-title mainly because the vagueness of the title requires a more complex plot, so I think you should keep it.

Rating: [9/10].

2-Description/Foreword: The length of the description could be shortened and the content of it can be of a greater efficiency. There's no point of the first two lines of the description, they're repetitive and serve the same meaning. You can start from "He suffered a tragic accident..." because it fulfills a desired purpose and sounds more compact and sensible. The foreword section is neat and interesting and the poster is adorable.

Rating: [8/10].

3-Plot: The introduced is very well-done, it's sufficient, it's brief and I can already analyse how it'll affect the future development of the story, mentioning his initial impression of the concept of friendship is very wise, it could be used as foreshadowing to an anticipated sub-plot. As for the language used in the story, it can be generally improved. Speech correctness in your story is overall correct and precise, but there are several syntactic issues within the first paragraph alone. Whether English is your first language or not, the correctness of the speech used in your story must be completely accurate in order to deliver the desired message and meaning. Here's the impression which I've received from the language used in the beginning of your story; I'm currently under the impression that you've written this story in one language and translated it into English. It doesn't matter whether I'm right or wrong, what matters is how quickly can you heal this wound and how can you represent this work after finalised polishing. It's a great shame because throughout the story, the language improves drastically, nearly a complete change to the best, just work on the beginning of the story because it doesn't live up to the rest of the story. However, as for the beginning, there's really no better way to rid your work of grammatical and syntactic errors than to run a draft through an online editor, you can find a lot on this platform, they provide editorial service or simply download one of those grammar checking programmes. I personally recommend Grammarly, as annoying as their ads can get, it's actually a very helpful application and it's free.

As for speech clearness, it's very impressive and adequate. Your choice of vocabulary and diction has definitely elevated and became more inclusive of literary devices which only assisted in the general development of your story. The language in use truly reflects the darkness which harbours within the main character and exhibits an insightful glimpse into its psychological persona. Speech effectiveness is also evident throughout the story, I, as a reader, can sense Sehun's loneliness and excruciating solitude; It'd help to employ the third-person narrative to truly capture the main character's most deprived needs, motives, and expectations in order to achieve a cathartic result during the resolution.

There are few points which made no sense to me as I went through this story