“1000 Paper Cranes”

By: Izarakovic.

Reviewer: St-renaissance.

1-Title: “1000 Paper Cranes” sound like an interesting title, definitely original and captivating. It entails of a passing struggle, perhaps a journey of a certain character; the mentioning of a number in titles is usually in reference to something significant, like a date. However, in your case, it’s a literary device to supplement an exaggeration of some sort. The meaning has been delivered in an elegant way, I don’t recommend changing anything.

Rating: [10/10].

2-Description/Foreword: The length of the description is suitable for the length of the story/one shot. It reminds the reader of the focus of the plot without heavily indulging into it or straying too far away from it; it’s unique and sufficient, though I’d love to understand the connection between the art of Origami and wish-making. Don’t hesitate to restructure the description in a way that you can incorporate the purpose of paper cranes to draw a connection between the exaggerated number in your title and the main character’s collective ambition. There’s a syntactical issue in the first line; you’re speaking about the character in the past, so the phrase should be “As a child, Seungwan loved paper cranes”, rather than using the present tense which is incorrect. Finally, the poster is incredibly beautiful.

Rating: [9/10].

3-Plot: The beginning is absolutely brilliant, on the right track, it provides a definitive briefing on the origin of the object in question, which is paper cranes, it's sufficient in form and structure; not too detailed, not too vague. You've locked down the beginning which is usually the difficult portion of developing a plot. Let's begin analysing the narrative. You've chosen the third-person narrative which is usually the most common, well-established narrative in literature. The third-person narrative works inwardly; meaning that you must construct a certain environment for your character to function in; a scenic field for the narrative to break loose and experience farther limits. In other words, settings are a must for the third-person narrative, literally, it's an Aristotelian pillar to the most fundamental aspects of writing. Once you've produced the unit of place and established the weather, temperature, scenery and how it reflects on the main character, you're free to begin using the narrative as liberally as you'd like. Whereas with the first-person narrative works outwardly, it introduces the audience or readers to the concepts psychological consciousness and inner monologues then turn to the environmental aspect.

Your story is led by two main characters, Joohyun and Seungwan, but you haven't properly introduced either of them. You see, first impressions are vital in short stories because if a certain character is neglected it'll reflect on the readers' amenability to accept or remember said character. If the narrative used in this story is the third-person narrative, then you can simply use that voice to investigate into the character's psychological and emotional scheme. Is the character dreamy? That needs to be exhibited in actions during major events, if you had selected the first-person narrative, then you could've used the inner monologues to help explore the character's persona. But, you've chosen the third-person narrative, meaning that you must employ this tool to apply the character's motives and ambitions into actions. We can't simply be told that the character is ambitious and leave it at that, the narrative must