When you fall in love, it’s impossible to stand again.

They say, in every fall, we should lift ourselves up and stand again for that’s how it should be.

During our childhood years, we’re so used to tripping and falling, sometimes face first to the ground. Most likely than not, our initial reaction is to stand up with a poker face and pretend that nothing happened then cry in the arms of our mothers once we reach home. After putting ointment on our wounds and being comforted and fed with a hearty meal, the fall that happened a while ago will already be forgotten. Yes, we were embarrassed especially when a lot of people saw us almost kissing the ground, but the thought of embarrassment will fade for in our young minds, we’re thinking, “What’s done is done, Mom already put an ointment on my wound, it’s still stinging but not as much as before. I’m all good”.

Years passed and we’re not children anymore. Instead of falling off from bicycles or trees, we fall for people already. The child is now a grown-up and love is one game that he/she is so fond but so serious in playing.

Falling in love with someone is really a wonderful feeling for it motivates us and pushes us to be a better person. Sadly, aside from the beautiful things it brings us, we have taken huge risks, involving our hearts and even our whole being.

In love, getting hurt is inevitable and as we all know, a broken heart is so hard to deal with.

If before in every fall we can pull ourselves up to stand right away and forget what happened after being comforted, now no matter what we do and how many people comfort us, pulling ourselves up to stand again is really difficult.

Why is that?

It’s because the wound that we got is not easy to heal. We badly want it to be a scar already but the memories are still being remembered every time it stings. Pulling ourselves up is easy, but standing straight and sturdy on your own two feet after a heartbreak is hard for we’ll always be reminded of how much we risked, how much time we wasted and how hard we tried to give our all to that person.

But you know what? Like a physical wound, broken hearts can heal faster as well. Instead of an ointment, we should learn how to move on, let go and accept that the person who we fell in love with but broke our hearts is just one of the billion possible halves of our hearts and that we can still find someone better.

It’s only a matter of looking forward to the future, living the present and forgetting the past.

In my whole existence, not even once did I picture myself being stupid for love. Before, I always tell myself that I will never let anyone make a fool out of me. Now, with all that has happened and is happening, I’m starting to realize how stupid I am for letting love control me too much instead of me controlling it.

I can be called a martyr. A brass statue should be built to applaud my martyrdom. As much as I want to let go of her, I can’t for a million reasons. One of it is, I’m totally into her and leaving her is not an option even though the idea has hit my mind once.

Rae needs me now more than ever because I have a feeling that once things don’t work the way she wanted and pictured it to be, she’ll go insane and will need someone to save her sanity.

“Here!” I called out to Rae with my arm raised up.

We got home from Thailand three days ago and now are both on a roll with our respective jobs. But of course, I’m not forgetting to give her even a few hours from my busy schedule.

“You’re early” she said, pulled out a chair then sat opposite mine.

I’m an hour early before she opens the restaurant coz I know how hectic she’ll be once people start to pour.

“I decided to have breakfast here before heading to work” I said then stared at her with a smile on my face “You better prepare something special for me”

She chuckled then leaned forward to pinch my cheeks “Aigoo…you arrived an hour early before we open…you’re gonna eat for free….and you want it to be special…waaaa….Choi Seunghyun…you may be one of the biggest celebrities in this country…but isn’t that too much? Isn’t it abusive?” she joked, making me laugh.

With a happy mood, I did an aegyo that I’m sure didn’t come off cute but annoying to her.

As expected, she cringed “I think you’re really starving coz you’re going out of mind already”

It made me laugh “You’re right”

She stared at me for a while. Her eyes are sparkling and smiling “Alright…I’ll feed you now”

Excusing herself to make my special breakfast, I waited for her with my heart in glee.

After our trip, I noticed that we are closer now than ever. In the three days that we spent together, just me and her, we were able to catch up and clear the issues and misunderstandings in our relationship.

Surprisingly and for reasons I’m really curious about, she made me believe and trust that her relationship with Jiyong will go smoothly amidst all the possible problems that may occur. We can never be sure of it, that’s why I decided to still keep an eye on Jiyong, this time without her knowing.

Ever since they became a couple and after voicing out what I really feel about it, I noticed that Rae is really awkward whenever Jiyong and I are in one place together. I think the reason to this is because she knows that I’m watching his every move and is ready to attack without even thinking twice if he does something wrong or inappropriate. So for her not to worry about it anymore, I’ll act normal like I used to before.

“Here’s your special breakfast Sir” she came out with my food smelling really delicious.

I watched hungrily and in awe while she’s placing it in front of me.

“It’s a Belgian Waffle with raspberry whipped cream and caramel on top” she said then sat on the chair opposite mine.

“Waaaa…this is indeed special” I said, making her nod and giggle.

One characteristic that I want my future wife to possess is she has to be a good cook. Even before Rae come into my life, I’ve always wanted a girl who can satisfy my taste buds and fill my stomach with good food, making this one of the many reasons why I love her.

Drooling, I dig in right away. As expected, it’s a masterpiece.

“Why aren’t you eating?” I asked while deliciously munching my sumptuous meal.

She sighed “I don’t have the appetite”

I looked at her, alarmed “Why is that?” Are you feeling sick?”

This woman is one of the best chefs I know that ironically is not a food fanatic, but she rarely loses her appetite and if she does, it’s either she’s not feeling well or something is bothering her, causing her to just think of it and not do anything but that.

She shook her head “I’m good”

It’s so obvious that she’s lying. I guess she has already forgotten that I can read her in any way.

“Were you able to talk with Jiyong already?” I asked, making her look into my eyes in amazement.

“Aigoo Seunghyunie…you really know me…I don’t know how you do it…you can easily read me and never fails to hit home” she said.

I smirked “Rae…the only problem that can make you dysfunctional is Jiyong”

She rol