So far as I could tell, it was mission: success. Even though the video had only stayed up for twelve hours before SM realized the problen and had it removed, it had almost a million views, and was only increasing on the social networking sites like Tumblr and Twitter. The fangirls had not failed me. 

Of course, there was no way to know if it had reached Han Geng or not. Still, for as much as I could know, I felt pretty confident.

That's putting the punishment aside, though. Can't say I didn't expect it, but as a response, I was forbidden from the Super Junior dorm. They took away my key card, took my thumb print out of the security registry, and forced the members to change the passcode. I can't complain, though. I expected something like that. I couldn't have free passage to the SuJu dorm forever, and I think it was worth the sacrifice.

Also, my promotion schedule was increased. Pretty much all of my free time went to sleeping. In addition to filming, suddenly I had variety shows to appear on, people in the industry to meet, and... you'd never believe this... an album to produce. 

Yup. For some strange reason, "Divide" had become so popular that the company had decided to let me debut as a singer as well. Since I was a songwriter, I also had to write the lyrics to the whole thing. And that meant work, work, work, work. There were lyrics to write, music to compose, and choreography to practice. Yup. Can't be an SM artist unless there's dancing, right? Well, unless you're TRAX, but that's a different story.

Writing took me a long time. There were plenty of days that I'd fall asleep, hunched over my ukulele in the practice room, only to be shaken awake by someone trying to use the room. 

One of these days, it was the wonderful pleasure to have been Donghae. I looked up sleepily, rubbing my eyes and yawning, "Oh, sorry, Fishy... I'll leave in a second."

He laughed, leaning down. "You just smudged eyeliner all over the place. You look like a panda now."

I grabbed a mirror and looked at myself in it, grimacing. "Aish... I was in a photography session for Ceci magazine this morning and had to be all made up... I forgot about it."

He reached down and, to my surprise, carefully began to wipe away the black smudges. All I could do was stare at him. 

"There," he said, smiling. "That's the Minsung we remember."

When I looked in the mirror again, the eye makeup was gone, and I was looking at a pair of round, puffy eyes, dark-ringed by sleep deprivation instead of makeup.

"Oh, wow, that's not attractive at all," I chuckled, putting the mirror down. 

"It's what I'm used to," he said, sitting down on the ground next to me and trying to look over my shoulder at my music. "With the makeup, you just look scary."

When I realized that he was trying to peek, I flipped the music over quickly. "Don't look, Fishy! It's not even good yet!"

"What do you mean? It can't be that bad. Are you having problems?"

I slumped over the paperwork, groaning. "Yes... the lyrics are done, but the composition just sounds stupid. "

"Can I see, then? I'm not a really great songwriter, but maybe I can help..."

I bit my lip, thinking, then handed the papers over to him. Fishy wrote the music to "Haru" and "A Short Journey", and a few other things, if I remember correctly, so he was right, he might be able to help. I'd been planning to maybe ask Henry, but Donghae was just as good. Well, maybe not quite as good, but close enough.

"And the song's title is 'Don't Know How to Dance'? This is about your trainee days again, isn't it?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

He looked back down at the sheet, frowning. "This a dance song."

"Yes, yes it is."

"And this part right here... that's English, right?"

"Yes. The three refrains are all different."

"Is it about me?"

I stopped, about to say something, then suddenly realizing what he'd asked. "Um... not exactly. Just... you guys in general," I replied, my cheeks pink.

"Hmmm..." he stood up, then went over to the electric keyboard and looked at the paper. He plunked a few notes, looked back down, then plunked a few more. He waved me over, handed me the paper, then said, "Okay, I'm going to play the notes, and then you just sing the words to the notes I play."

"Oh dear, this ought to be good..." I said, then shrugged, and did as I was told.

"You said this was composed by Super Junior's Lee Donghae?" the production manager asked, flipping through the sheet music while I nervously played with the edge of my shirt and bit my lip. 

"Yes, yes it is. Well, I wrote the lyrics, and Donghae-oppa composed it."

He flipped the papers closed, then slid the ten different songs worth of music back towards me. "You have quite a variety of music styles in this collection, Queen Be. Ballads, rock, and the dance pop of the final song. Is this what you really want to put on your album?"

"The songs just come out as I write them. I create the composition based on what the song's about. I don't go into composition thinking about the target audience. And this way, I think I'm able to show my own diversity in music and personality. Is that a bad thing?" I asked, looking up, still biting my lip. It would start bleeding soon if I didn't stop that.

"It might work with your concept, so we'll have to go with it. Have you given any thought to which one you'd like to be your main track?"

I stopped, frozen. "N-no. I haven't. I just wrote them."

"We'll begin promotions with 'Don't Know How to Dance', then. The fact that Donghae composed it will make it easier to promote, and the dance track feel of it will cater to SM's audience."

I grimaced, looking back at the ground. "Does this mean... I have to dance, don't I?"

I thought I saw a small smile play across his lips as he answered. "Yes, Queen Be. Don't worry, with practice, you'll be able to do it eventually."

That's encouraging. Exactly what I want to hear when I jump into the black hole they call the life of an idol at SM.

"I love you, but I-
don't know how to dance, 
don't know how to dance..." I sang to myself through the hallways as I headed towards the studio, ready to do the recording. I couldn't believe this was happening. I never went into SM with the delusion that I'd become a singer. Singing was for talented people. 

I passed by SuJu's practice room, and, seeing the door open, and lights on, I poked my head in to peek.

It was Eunhyuk, practicing his individual cuts of the choreography for "Paper Wall." The song had been enough of a success in Korea that they'd sent it over to the United States, where it was then being viewed by half the country. People that had harassed me for liking Super Junior were now actually able to recognize the name, and even the song. The album was starting to skyrocket in sales. I shouldn't have the "in your face" reaction, but I did. My boys were finally getting known in my home country. It wasn't massively popular yet (still behind Lady Gaga and Katy Perry), but that would change when their promotion schedule for the United States began. 

For now, though, I watched as Eunhyuk whirled and bended, not thinking about the near future. I leaned against the doorframe, watching him spin to the music that I had written. The music stopped, and he looked up, seeing my reflection in the mirror. He turned, grinning at me. "Are you going to start drooling again?"

I glared at him, then took a step into the room. "You weren't being y this time. Just awesome. That's different."

He shrugged. "It's all dance. I heard about your debut, by the way. Congratulations."

I half-smiled, half-grimaced. "Thanks, I guess. I'm really nervous, though. It's a dance song. And I can't dance."

"But isn't it called 'Don't Know How to Dance'? Even if you screw up, it won't matter."

I made a face at him, then conceded. "I guess you're right. I don't even know how it's all supposed to work out. Once I record everything, then I have to work with a choreographer, and then there's the music video, and I'm scared for whatever the music video's going to be, and then there's even more promotions..."

He patted me on the head, messing up my hair. "Why don't you just choreograph the dance so that it looks like you can't dance?"

"What, you mean, make it so it looks like an accident, but I'm doing it on purpose?"

He nodded. "That way, even if you mess up, no one would ever know."

I thought about it, then felt a smile creep across my face. "You're as awesome as ever, Oppa. Kamsahamnida."

He shrugged. "Don't worry about it. Minsung helped us succeed in America; it only makes sense that we help her with her career in Korea. Now, I'd better get back to making you drool..."

"Stop that!" I whined, punching him on the shoulder. "It's embarassing enough without you bringing it up all the time! And besides, I don't drool every time. Only when you're doing something... provocative."

He leaned forward, an eyebrow up. "I can change what I'm practicing, if you like." 

I shoved him away, gulping. My heart had suddenly jumped into my throat. "No, that's okay. You just... go back to what you were doing," I squeaked, "I have to go do my recording, anyway. So, um, bye!"

A week after the recording was another meeting. Me, Jung Ah, one of the higher-ranking managers, one of the company's top choreographers, and a director I hadn't met yet.

I bowed to them, and the meeting began.

"Now that your song has been recorded and edited," the manager began, "We'll be discussing the dance and music video. Queen Be, this is Mr. Hyun. He'll be choreographing for you."

I bowed to him, then stated, "I had an idea for the choreography... is it alright if I say it?" Mr. Hyun declared it okay, so I continued. "One of my sunbaes said it would be good if, since the song is about not being good at dancing, if we make the dance based on that."

Mr. Hyun nodded. "That was the concept we were thinking of doing anyway. I look forward to working with you, Queen Be."

That's until you find out how terrible of a dancer I am, I thought, wincing. 

"That said, we'll also tell you the concept of the music video," the manager said, "Since Queen Be's concept is suppsed to be fun and energetic, we're giving it a somewhat comical feel. Isn't that right, Director Shin?"

The director nodded. "We've met with your manager before, and she stated that Queen Be tended to look down on exclusively dance videos. And also, since the song follows a story, we followed that logic and made the video's very similar."

What?! An SM video with a plot?! Well, "Paper Wall" had a plot, but that's because I poked and prodded the members to push for it. Was I actually making change to the industry? Was I already succeeding with my goals for SM?

"You'll be the main character, of course," the director continued. "Following a male star, completely infatuated with him. He encounters you, and you realize that he loves you. Then, in the end, there's a dance part, showing renewed confidence."

"You mean, there'll be a guest star?"

Jung Ah's eyebrows went up. "We asked various popular male artists in the company. When we asked Super Junior's Eunhyuk, he said yes without a second thought. Something about already being comfortable with you?"

Huh? I'd be doing a music video with Hyukkie?!

"IT'S SO COLORFUL!" I squealed, running in a circle around the set. It'd been a few weeks since the little meeting, and I'd practiced my choreography to death. I was less nervous and more... RIDICULOUSLY EXCITED. I spun around, then went back to Eunhyuk. "Oppa, am I supposed to be this excited?"

He shrugged, looking around. "It's your first music video. You're actually supposed to be nervous."

I shook my head. "I'm not nervous at all. I have to be completely infatuated with Eunhyuk-oppa because he's such a better dancer than I am, and try really hard to keep up with him. How is that even acting?" As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I could feel my face turn pink, all the way up to my ears. "You heard nothing."

"What? What did I hear?" he asked, innocently. It almost didn't even sound like he was pretending. I glared at him, and he just looked confused. Then, I thought, could he really be that dense?

When he just continued to look confused, I confirmed that suspicion. He was quite dense. "Nothing. Are you ready?"

"I'm fine with it. Unless you're nervous."

"And now you sound like Kyuhyun," I scowled, making him laugh.

"Don't worry, Minsung, I'll do my best. Then maybe you can come with us to America."

My head snapped up, and i looked at him, wide-eyed. "Wait, what?! Are you serious?"

He just laughed and started to walk away. I chased after him, yelling, "YA! Come on, you have to tell me!"

 "Aish, I can't stop laughing! She's stalking me!" Eunhyuk doubled over laughing, even though I threw my shoe at him. He ducked and continued laughing. 

"Oppa! You're messing up my music video! It's supposed to be dorky!"

I ran up to him with my shoe, and when he kept laughing, started to beat him with it. "Come on, we're almost finished!"

He ran away from me, around the set, and I threw my shoe at him again, but missing this time. I ran to go grab it, but tripped over one of the camera cords, tumbling forward.

Then somehow I was in Eunhyuk's arms, looking up at him. "Minsung, are you alright?" he asked, still holding me up.

I regained my footing and pushed away from him, gulping and looking at the cameras. "Um, well... then... that was embarassing. Were you filming that?!"

One of the cameramen shrugged. "It's the behind-the-scenes camera. We catch everything."

I swore under my breath in Spanish, my cheeks red. "Oh, great. Can we just finish this, Eunhyuk-oppa?"

"Can't take my eyes off you-
watch you while you dance,
can't help how y
how perfect your dancing is.

You're amazing, so amazing
and I try my best to keep up with you.
I'm not a slouch;
I have a lot of talents.

I can act,
I can sing
I'm kind of pretty
But there's just one thing.

I love you, but I...
don't know how to dance,
don't know how to da-ance
Keep up with you in everything else,
but you make me feel insufficient
with just a few moves.
My god, you're so good.
It's the thing that keeps me from you,
all because I don't know how to dance.

I'm trying, I'm trying.
If I can keep up with you,
my angel,
maybe I'll have a chance.

I practice every day-
fall down, fall down-
I don't have any natural talent-
my frustration makes tears come out.

Oh please, don't look at me yet-
not like this.
You're so kind, guiding my steps,
so I can't help but let you help me.

Oh, I love you, so...
Teach me how to dance,
teach me how to da-ance.
You're the only one who's good enough.
I love you even more for your patience,
teaching every move.
It's the thing that keeps me close to you,
While you teach me how to dance.

With every step and move
I see you smiling at me...
your voice tells me
you loved me the way I was...

You loved me when I watched you dance,
loved me when I was clumsy...
loved me when I asked you for help,
because it gave you time with me...

I took advantage of my time with you,
and now, I...

I can totally dance!
Now I know how to dance-
I know how to da-ance
Keep in step with you, finally good enough
never feeling insufficient,
never really was.
I got it, got it,
I'm not perfect, but I got the moves
And not keeping myself from you,
because, because of you,
I finally know how to dance."

By the time we had finished filming the first half of the video, where the vast majority of the actual plot was taking place, I was slightly tired of the song. Much as I liked the sound of my own voice, I could get tired of it after hearing it about ten thousand times. And it would play even more now that we were moving onto the choreography section. 

I looked in the mirror, pulling at the skin under my eyes with the tip of my fingers. "They do a pretty good job of hiding the dark circles..." I muttered to myself. 

"What do you mean, dark circles? You're only halfway done!" Eunhyuk remarked, plopping down next to me.

"We've been here for almost twenty-four hours! We had a break for dinner, and then it was right back to filming. This is even crazier than filming the drama!"

"They're in a hurry," Eunhyuk shrugged, chugging a bunch of water. 

"Don't know what for," I muttered, yawning. 

"Hey! No yawning! You need to look pretty for the dance part!"

"Then I need..." I started to yell, then was interrupted mid-sentence by a yawn. "...tea."

He reached and put his hands around my face, pinching my cheeks together so I couldn't help but make annoyed fish-lips at him.

"Aigoo, our Minsung is so tired!"

I glared at him, despite my fishy-lips. "I'm about to smack you."

He withdrew, pouting. "So violent... God says not to hurt our fellows, you know..."

"You sound like Shisus. Not Christian, remember?"

"We can fix that."

"You just have fun with that," I snorted, pushing my bangs back behind my ears. 

He leaned over, getting really close to my face. "I just might."

When my heartbeat started to spasm, I shoved him over, hard enough that he rolled right off of his chair. "Stop getting so close to me!" I cried, jumping out of my chair. "You know it makes me uncomfortable! I'm an American, remember?!"

"Queen Be! Eunhyuk! Are you ready to move onto the next set of filming?!" I heard the director call. 

I grabbed Eunhyuk's wrist and yanked him to his feet. "Yes, Shiljjang-nim!"

"Well, that was fun," I yawned, looking around at the set hands, scrambling to take the set down. "How long do you think it'll take to edit?"

Eunhyuk shrugged. "A couple of days, sometimes a week or so."

"My first music video..." I nudged him, pulling my phone out. "Oppa, should we take a selca? As a memoir."

"With the phone from Leeteuk? We spoil you, don't we?"

"Rotten. Now come on! Selca!"

He laughed, and then put his arm around my shoulders so we could fit into the camera space. When the photo was taken, I stood up, saving it to my Twitter account. Then, in a moment of surprise, I turned and got a snap shot of Eunhyuk. I looked at the picture, giggling.

"Oppa, I think this is your best picture!" I showed him, a lovely image taken right as he blinked, making him look like some kind of zombie.

"Ya! Don't be taking secret pictures of me!"

I grabbed my phone back, putting the picture on my Twitter before he could stop me. "Too late now, Oppa."

He grimaced, then stood up to walk with me. "Where are we going?"

"I'm going to..." I was cut off when I stumbled. My legs suddenly felt weak.

Eunhyuk grabbed my arm, holding me steady. "Ya, Minsung-ah, are you alright?"

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine," I replied, blinking away divviness. "I'm just... tired. And hungry. I'll be fine when I get home."

Eunhyuk's brow furrowed in concern. "Didn't you eat anything during the filming?"

"Huh? Oh, no, I didn't. I gained five pounds since debut- I had to start dieting. And all they had there had a really high fat content..."

I stumbled again, only not falling because of the hold he had on my arm. "Minsung-ah, why didn't you tell anyone?! You need to eat!"

"I didn't want... to bother anyone," I replied. It was getting increasingly difficult to see straight. Caffeine and adrenaline had gotten me through the filming, but now that it was over, I suddenly felt dizzy. "I'm... fine..."

And then everything suddenly went dark.