"Oh, hello! Hello! My name is Stephanie Hwang!" Tiffany said about a million times, and I couldn't help but notice the way she had to fight back the urge to bow, too.

"You sang one of the OST songs, didn't you?" the director asked.

She nodded. "Yes, I sang it with two of the other members of Girls' Generation, Taeyeon and Seohyun. I was invited today for a day of filming." She smiled brightly, her eyes disappearing, such a beautiful smile, unlike my toothy one.

"I hope you enjoy yourself, Miss Hwang," the director said, before one of the camera crew members caught his attention. He walked off, and she wound her arm through mine.

"Introduce me to everyone! The twelve Zodiac members, the main characters... even though Liam isn't as hot as Chris..."

"What Chris?" Liam asked, pulling earbuds out of his ears.

I shrugged. "Your brother."

He made a face. "Oh, yes, that Chris. I have a brother with that name."

Tiffany giggled, and I rolled my eyes. "If it makes you feel better, I had this friend Chris that all of my friends went ga-ga over. I didn't really notice. Maybe it was the blonde hair... anyway, this is my friend Tiffany, or Stephanie Hwang."

"She speaks English?!" He remarked, open-mouthed.

"She's one of few, deary. I have a group of friends in the Kpop scene that all speak English. But you missed out on the chance to meet the coolest ones."

"Hey!" Tiffany yelled, and I laughed, poking her in the side with my tail.

"You just came to see Shay and Queen Be fight, didn't you?" he joked, leaning forward.

"Actually, I--"

"-you just want girls fighting over you!" I interrupted, jabbing him in the shoulder. "Not going to happen. I am not getting involved. Personally, I think girls aren't that pretty when they're jealous. Not that I'm one to judge."

Tiffany laughed. "You remember that one time..."

I let her lead me away, back to where she'd be sitting, watching the events take place. A lot of action scenes were filmed in Seoul, but they were all movie events, when we collected the crystals.

"Queen Be... Queen Be... are you up?"

I jolted awake, the imprint of my watch on my cheek. I'd fallen asleep leaning over the desk in my hotel room in Los Angeles, writing a letter to my sister.

It had been eight months since I had first left Korea, only two since I had left the second time. All of the filming was done, all of the previews released. Everything had been a blur of tv shows and meetings, interviews and photoshoots. The movie would be released in the middle of June, and it never seemed to approach quickly enough. I wanted to go home.

"Queen Be, can I talk?"

It was Shay, her face bare of makeup for the first time in as long as I could remember. I must have fallen asleep without locking the door. Stupid. What if some crazy sasaeng had tried to get in?!

I sat up, rubbing my eyes. Unlike hers, my face was almost always devoid of makeup when we weren't filming or on some kind of talk show, so I wasn't bothered. "Come all the way from your pad in Hollywood to attack me?" I asked sarcastically.

"I-I'm sorry about that. For calling you a ."

"Well, you know, I'm not the straight girl that played a lesbian. I tend to be very monogamous."

"...Right. Well, I'm just saying... that was silly. I was just so mad that everyone gave you so much attention! You weren't even the main character, not even the pretty face--"

"Thanks."

"Sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Don't bother. I've gotten used to that."

"I just didn't understand... why do they like you so much?"

"I don't spend much time thinking about what people think of me. Whether I annoy them, whether I freak them out... I've learned that life's a lot easier if you just stop caring. I have this friend, Jessica. When I first met her, I hated her. She threatened me, pushed me downstairs... basically the meanest girl you'd ever meet. But then she admitted that it was all a test. Because she had to make sure I'd be able to survive the harsh reality of the industry I was joining. I don't think that's the case this time, though."

"And people like you because you don't care if they like you?"

"Well, not exactly. I do prefer that people like me. But I've come to realize that the people that hate me are the ones that would hate me no matter what I did to try to change their opinion. So why waste the effort? I learned that from Super Junior."

She gave me a weird look. "Super Junior?"

I smiled. "Sure. It's a band. They're my seniors at my company. A bunch of crazy guys that take care of me, and I take care of them. I learned a lot from them. How to be strong, how to be resilient, how to be happy."

I dug through my bag, holding out a CD case. "Here. You can have this." It was a copy of SPY, the album I'd bought myself.

She looked at it, then up at me. "You're giving it to me?!"

I shrugged. "Sure. I have all of their albums. Most signed. That one's not. I can get another one of those whenever I want. So give it a listen. It's in Korean, but I don't think that matters. You don't have to like them; not everyone does, but they're the guys who taught me how to live."

She took it, gingerly, looking down at the pink and white cover. "I still think you're strange."

I grinned. "Of course. To me, that's a compliment. After all, I'm a feminist," I said, as if that explained everything. "Now, dear, you should go bac to your pad. I think I'm going to go back to Wisconsin."

"You mean go back home?"

I shook my head, packing clothes into a rolling bag. "No. Back to Wisconsin. Home is somewhere else now."

I waited until she left, then finished packing my bags, and was checked out of the hotel before anyone got the chance to inquire after me.

I hesitated, my fist poised over the door. Should I have called ahead? Should I have let them know ahead of time? What if they were using my room for something else? Maybe I should have gotten a hotel in Green Bay...

I knocked on the door, and waited. Had Dad heard me knock? Were they all home? No... the van was in the driveway... maybe I should ring the doorbell? These bags are getting heavy...

The door opened, and Mom stood there, looking down at me. "Mel?!"

"Yeah... it's me. I know, I didn't tell you guys I was coming... it was spur of the moment... but I was in the country, so I-"

She swept me into her arms, bags and all. "Why did it take you so long to visit! Get in here!" She grabbed my rolling bag, pulling it in behind me, as I stepped in. 

When had her hair gotten so gray? Well, more silver than gray, but... it had been almost imperceptible last time I was there. Now I could easily see the light strands without looking closely. 

"Where have you been?" she asked, sternly, but I could tell she was happy. "You send us a check for half a million dollars, saying you're going to be in a Hollywood movie, and we still don't see your face. You don't come for Christmas, not for your birthday, not for your brother's birthday..."

I waved her away, apologizing. "I know, Mom, I know. I'm sorry. I'm doing the best I can. I've written at least once every month, sent pictures, and I told you about the movie even when no one's supposed to know... did you pay off the house?"

She hugged me again. "You didn't have to give us that money, sweetie. You should have spent it on a house for yourself, or a vacation, or..."

"Mom, I don't need that much money. Just on my earnings from doing commercials, releasing albums, and making music videos, I make enough to pay for my apartment, buy food and clothes and whatever else I need, and indulgences every now and then, like plane tickets to Wuhan."

"Wuhan?" 

"Never mind. The point is, if I didn't send it here, I would have just donated it to charity anyway. So don't worry about it."

I heard heavy footsteps, and turned to see my dad, as usual, not wearing a shirt, his big belly hanging over his waistband just as much as Xun Lin's had when he was playing Boar. I braced myself, waiting for the criticism.

"You cut your hair short," was the first thing he said.

"Y-yeah... it was for the character. Have you seen the previews for Twelve?"

Mom answered for him. "We were waiting for them. It came on during the Super Bowl!"

"Wait, really?!"

"I thought you said you weren't one of the main characters?" Dad said, his lips turning upwards.

"I'm not... that's Liam and Shay. Oh, and Nick." I said the last name with as much poison as I could.

Mom laughed. "Don't like Nick Jonas, huh?"

I grimaced. "You have no idea. I had to sing a song with him, too. It was awful." They both laughed, and then Mom ushered me in, pulling my bags behind me. 

I stayed at my parents' house for several weeks, waiting for the movie to be released. And I talked with them. I talked about Liam, and Shay, and about the different members of the Zodiac. I told them about meeting Jackie Chan, and supporting Han Geng. About Korea, Japan, and China, and the L.A. sun. The sky in Chile, the stars near Cape Horn. I played with Patrick, and laughed when he started singing along to my songs. My sister came over, eating dinner with us. I told her about my cat, staying at the Jung sisters' house. I visited my family members, all of them acting a little strange around me. Like they weren't sure what to think of my fame, no matter how much I tried to convince them that I was still their family member. I saw Tessa, James, Ariel, and even Chris, keeping myself under a low profile. My own country felt uncomfortable to me, where being recognized in Asia seemed only natural. And with everyone, they were all excited for the movie. Because I was playing Rat.

I don't know how, but somehow over the course of filming, Rat's character had become more central than had been originally intended. She was featured heavily in the previews, climbing buildings, making snide commentary. Well, I was. The digital effects were awesome. My tail looked way cooler in CGI.

All of that time, I spent with my family. Not once did they bring up the last e-mail I had sent to them. Not once did they mention the rumors ofme dating a man ten years older than me. Not once. I was starting to wonder if they'd forgotten about it. Until...

"So, Mel, how's it going with your man-friend?" Jackie asked, taking a sip of kool-aid. She was visiting again, taking advantage of the time I would be in Wisconsin.

"Man-friend?" Dad asked, looking up from his book.

"Yeah. Since he's too old to be a boyfriend, so he's a man-friend."

Dead. Silence. You could hear the birds chirping outside. 

Now, my sister and I talk to each other about anything. And I mean anything. And over the years, we got quite comfortable with talking about it around our parents. I could describe some of the wonderful conversations we'd had at that dinner table together, but I'm sure you don't want to know. This was the first time I really wished she would have shut .

"Oh yes... that's right..." Mom tried, looking up at Dad. "Your boyfriend... how long have you been..."

"Close to two years now," I answered, looking over at Dad, too.

Jackie made a face. "Longer than I've ever kept a boyfriend."

I glared at her from across the table. There was no way she was that stupid. She was doing this on purpose.

We all looked at Dad. Then at each other. Then back at Dad.

He looked up from his book. "Which one was it again, Mel? The short one that looked like a girl?"

I clenched my fork in my hands. "No, Dad. Zhou Mi. The Chinese one that was taller than you."

"So what's his last name?"

"Zhou."

"His name is Zhou Mi Zhou?"

I sighed with annoyance. "No. His name is Zhou Mi. That's it. That's his whole name."

"Oh." He set the book down, setting his elbows on the table and leaning on his hands. "So he's how much older than you?"

"Ten years," I breathed, holding myself as tall as possible. 

He raised an eyebrow. "Ten years, and this is a serious relationship?"

I saw my sister looking down at my hands, and I realized that I'd bent the fork in half, bent into a right angle. I dropped it out of my fist, letting it clatter against my plate.

"It's lasted for two years, so I assume it's serious."

He sighed. "Why can't you find a nice American man? Your own age?"

"Dad, you don't even know Zhou Mi!"

"He doesn't exactly live around here!" he shouted back, and I glared at him with as much ice as I could. 

My glare never left my father's all the while my mother and sister exchanged glances. Then both of them stood up, quietly grabbing Patrick's arm and guiding him up, quickly leaving the room. I never looked away.

"He is a great guy, and I love him very much," I growled.

"You don't know, Mel. You've never dated anyone before. How do I know he didn't just sleep with you and now you're obsessed?!"

"I didn't sleep with him, Dad! Who do you think I am?! We cuddled! When Henry was there! That's IT! I thought you trusted me more than that! Have you EVER known any guy who could take advantage of me?! Did you even know that I almost got ?! Did you know that?! And it wasn't by Zhou Mi, absolutely not. No, it was by a co-star, when I was in Wicked. And what happened?! I bruised his ribs. I SENT HIM TO THE F***ING HOSPITAL!" My voice rose to a roar, and I stood up, tipping my chair over behind me. I quieted down, knowing that my brother was in the next room, unaware of what was going on.

"Not Mimi. Not Zhou Mi. He was there for me when the storm hit the town, and I was terrified. He read poetry just because I said I liked it. He laughs, and when I'm feeling exhausted, he just smiles and hugs me and I feel like everything is better. When he's there, I'm not afraid of storms, or of the dark, and I have never felt like that before. Not with my family, or even with my friends. It's not that shallow. Please, Dad."

"I don't want you to ruin your life for this guy," he said, gripping the back of his chair.

I snorted. "He didn't ruin my life, Dad. He saved it."

"Fine. Do whatever you want."

He walked off, and I winced when I heard the screen door slam.

When everything was quiet, my mother, sister and brother creeped back to the dinner table.

I glared at Jackie. "Thanks, sibling. I appreciate it." I didn't bother to hide the acid sarcasm in my voice.

She attempted a smile. "Well... you know... it was going to happen eventually..."

Mom rubbed my back, smiling weakly. "You know you're still his little girl. It's a Dad problem."

I exhaled a laugh. "Most dads worry about their little girl dating a druggie problem maker. I'm dating a complete gentleman who went through school, with a nice family and a respectable job. If he weren't Chinese and ten years older than me, you'd think he'd be perfect."

I looked at Patrick, then opened my arms. I need a hug.

He walked over, wrapping his arms around me. I didn't have to bend over to hug him anymore. When did he get so tall?

I hugged him tightly, and for a long time. "Thanks, Patrick. I love you, okay, Dude? I love him just as much."

He seemed to understand, because his arms tightened around me, and he smiled. I wanted to cry. But I wouldn't. I was stronger than that.

In June, I went back to California for the movie premier. In only a few days, Twelve would come out in theaters, and people would go to see it. My friends, back in the United States for several months by then, my family, my fans in the United States, and outside of it, in a few days, when it was released internationally. 

I looked at myself in the mirror, then at Lela. She pulled at a bit of my hair, setting it into perfect place, and then nodded. "Not bad, kiddo. Your designers are really something."

I smiled, looking in the mirror again, smiling, thinking of Prom Queen Alexa, helping give pointers about my personal fashion sense. I wouldn't have been surprised if it was her who first took my suggestion about the outfit seriously. 

"But I really think the dress would have been..."

I laughed at her. "Tell you what, Lela. If I make it to the Oscars, I'll wear the dress."

She looked up at me in surprise, then her smile widened. "Alright. Don't you forget it. I'm ordering that dress. And you will wear it. If you make it to the Academy Awards, you are not getting out of it."

I laughed, nodding in agreement. "Deal. Alright, Lela. I'm going. See you around."

"Don't cause trouble, Queen Be."

I smiled and stood up, going towards the car that would take me to the red carpet.

"And next onto the red carpet is... Queen Be, as she goes by, coming out of the car in... is she wearing pants?"

I wanted to laugh at all of them. That's right. I was wearing black dress pants that ended just above the ankle, much like the Capri's I wore as Rat. Brightening them up were a pair of glittering gold heels that raised me up almost a decimeter, and on top a shimmering gold jacket over a white blouse, both cut to show off my figure. My short hair hung in spikes around my neck, gold earrings shaped like yin-yang symbols dangling from my ears. 

I waved at the cameras, stopping for the interview.

"We were a bit shocked, seeing you in pants, Queen Be, but you look very stunning."

I laughed politely. "Well, I figured that, at the premier, I wanted to channel Rat a little bit. You know, go more for the sassy look than for beauty. It's my personal image, too. I act a bit more like the tougher girl that likes to have a bit of fun. I'm sure Shay Mitchell's coming soon, dressed to kill."

"Those are some high heels..." the interviewer noted, and the camera panned down to my shoes.

I laughed. "I have a high heel addiction. Most of my fans could tell you that." I looked right at the camera, and said, in Korean, "Thank you , Honey Be's! Please enjoy the movie, Twelve!"

I bowed to the camera, then walked over to Jisong, my gold outfit catching the light of camera flashes.

Andrea sat on the ground, arranging the flowers so they looked neat and organized. Then, looking down, she grabbed the flowers and threw them everywhere. She stood up, wiping her hands on her pants. Next to her, Lawrence looked down at the grave, almost smiling.

The grave was a simple stone on the ground, decorated with flowers strewn every direction. 

"Jessica Louise O'Brion 'Street Rat'."

"So you found out what her name was?" Lawrence asked, putting his arm around Andrea's shoulders. 

She nodded, looking out over the Beijing skyline in the distance. "It was a long search, believe me. But when I talked to the local gangs about helping Rat, they were all for it. I think they were actually grieving for her. And... she didn't like things to be organized. She liked them thrown all over the place."

Lawrence laughed. "Come on, Andrea. Let's go home."

She looked down at the grave again, and then at the paper he held in his hands. "The Zodiac Foundation for Neglected, Abused, and Abandoned Children."

And then she smiled up at him, and let him guide her out of the graveyard.

The credits rolled, and everyone stood up to cheer. They cheered for me, for Shay, for Liam, clapping like crazy. I took a picture with Liam and Shay, happy for my high heels to bring myself up to Shay's height, though not Liam's. 

Throughout the country, it was being released. Critics had given the movie stunning reviews, with comments like "unexpectedly heartwrenching" and "a true international vision", or "it's easy to forget it's a fantasy movie. It seems so real."

Not that I had anything to do with that. It was all the story writers, the character developers. But it was nice to look at the credits scroll and see my name right underneath Shay's above Nick's. Admittedly, through most of the movie he'd been either held captive or unconscious.

Me? I was ready to go home. Go back to Korea, release the music video for SM Gold, promote... go back to my life. I liked that life.

"What do you mean, 'Stay in the United States'?!" I shrieked to Jung Ah, taking my high heels off and throwing them on the hotel floor.

She looked just as upset as I did. "The company wants to promote SM Gold in the United States instead, because it participated in the soundtrack of the movie. And what better a time to promote you when your popular movie is still in theaters?"

I dropped onto the bed, holding my head in my hands. "I just want to go back," I tried not so sound like I was whining, but it was hard not to."

She sighed, sitting down next to me and patting my back. "I know, Minsung. I want to go home, too. I miss my family and friends, too. But your success is the company's success. Do it for Liyin and BoA, okay?"

I sighed, taking out my phone. "Alright, Eonni. Just a few more months, and then I get to go home?"

She smiled. "Yes. Now, I'll give you a moment, since I know you're about to make phone calls. I have to go to English class, anyway."

She straightened up and walked out the door, and I waited until she closed it behind her to hit the speed dial on my phone, bringing it to my year. I wondered, briefly, how high my phone bill was going to be, considering how many international phone calls I was making. Considering my contract was based in Korea, where I had spent barely any time at all.

I laughed, hearing what his ringtone for me was. "Strong", but in a sped-up version, so I sounded like a chipmunk.

"Hello, this number cannot be reached at this time. Please leave a message at the tone."

I sighed, closing my eyes and waiting for the beep. "Mimi? You must be busy right now. It's me... your Niuwang. The premier was tonight. Are you going to the movie?" I paused a little bit, as if waiting for an answer, even though I knew I wasn't going to get one. "I know I said I would be back in a year, but... the company wants to extend my stay in the U.S. until early March. Because they think the OST for the movie's going to be really popular. So... they're having BoA-sunbae and Liyin-jiejie come here, and promote with me. That's good, right? I won't be alone anymore, at least. And it's not a man," I laughed at my own remark about being surrounded by girls instead of men, so he couldn't be jealous. "Just... call me back soon, okay? I need to hear your voice. I told you about my dad, but... you know... I miss you all a lot... okay? ...Bye."

I hung up the phone, sighing again. I flopped back onto my bed, imagining the sight of the sapphire blue stars on the hotel room ceiling, reminding me of who I was.