The concert hadn't even started yet, and that theater was so loud that you could barely hear yourself think. Already girls were screaming fanchants and waving their sapphire blue lightsticks in the air, creating the sapphire blue ocean. I held my own in the air and yelled to the girl next to me, "this is my first concert, so I'm sorry if I get a little crazy!"

She just grinned. "Don't worry! That never really goes away!"

I loved the ELF. The sounds in that theater were mixed, with different fanchants going at different times, but because there wasn't any music yet, it all sounded to me like the beat of a single heart. It was the loudest noise I had ever heard, resonating into my bones.

I loved it. 

I joined in the chants, joining the girls around me. I hadn't thought about it until then, but it was slightly dorky to be at this concert by myself. But Henry only gave me one ticket, and Min Hee hadn't wanted to come. 

It turned out not to be a problem. It took only minutes for me to be best friends with the girls around me. I screamed for Sungmin. They screamed for Siwon, Eunhyuk, and Donghae. I guess I earned their respect really fast because I could scream louder than the four of them put together.

Right about the time I had made myself comfortable, the lights around the audience went out, putting us all into a darkness illuminated only by thw glow of our sapphire blue lightsticks. The screaming magnified tenfold, and I loved the feeling of my popping eardrums, adjusting to the sonic boom.

The stage lights clicked on and the members stepped onstage, one by one, the intro music playing.  Oh my God, it was SJM. Oh my god, they were so handsome and charming and amazingineverywaypossible. 

Eunhyuk, Donghae, Sungmin, Kyuhyun, Ryeowook, Siwon...

Henry.

Suddenly, the chant that had been ringing in my ears suddenly changed. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I really, truly couldn't believe it.

"Thirteen plus two equals zero! Thirteen plus two equals zero!" It came from all around me, forcing its way into my ears and seething its black, vicious meaning into my bones. What was going on?! The girls around me that I had just become friends with... were screaming it at the top of their lungs! 

I looked up at the stage. The members seemed to be in a state of chaos. I could imagine what was going through their minds. Confusion, grief, pain... I could see it all on their faces. But none so clear as Henry.

I could have sworn he was looking right at me. He looked so completely in pain, I wanted to die. I couldn't possibly take that pain on his face. I wrenched my gaze away, to the girls standing next to me.

"What are you doing?!" I screeched, "This is an SJM stage! Why in the world are you screaming against Henry and Zhou Mi?! I thought everyone got over that! I thought people liked them now! And then when Henry had his solo album..."

"SM is taking away our Oppas' pride! They gave away it all to Henry! They say they're trying to appeal to international fans, but we know they're just trying to use Henry and Zhou Mi to replace Leeteuk and Yesung! They can't trick us!"

"That's crazy!" I shouted back, "You can't blame Henry and Zhou Mi for Leeteuk-oppa and Yesung-oppa having to go to the military! It's not their fault! Don't you think they've been through enough?! Don't you think that it's wrong, judging a person for things that aren't even their fault?! Don't you think it's wrong to take people who have real and true talent and tear them down just because you can't accept that they aren't the originals?! The members accept them and love them, so why can't you?!"

The concert had begun, and I knew that the members were performing, pouring out their hearts as they always did, no matter what was going on. Even if I was waging a war, ELF to SuJu fan... right there in the front row. I screamed, desperately fighting against the current of voices that threatened to sweep me away under a tide of useless anger and hate.

"Why are you lecturing us?!" The girl to my right screeched, "You're not even Korean, so you wouldn't know. We're ELF, remember?! We have to protect our Oppas!"

"PEOPLE LIKE YOU DON'T DESERVE TO CALL YOURSELVES ELF!!!!!!" I felt, more then heard the words explode from my mouth. Suddenly everyone for five seats around me was listening, but I was too infuriated to care. "ELF protect all of the Oppas, and that means Henry and Zhou Mi, too! Real ELF learn to love and trust them all, because that's what Leeteuk-oppa told us to do! Do you think that now that he's in the military, you can go back to treating the extra two members like crap?! They deserve better than that! Real ELF would never come to a SJM concert just to scream insults and force them off the stage. Real ELF would never do anything that would harm any of them! Can't you see that Henry and Zhou Mi are some of the most talented and hardworking people everywhere. Even when they're exhausted, they still work day after day to try to make everybody smile- to make them understand. Even when they come to a place where people are judgemental and vicious, they still put on their best face and do their best to perform, just like they're doing right now. They struggle and practice and perform all in the hopes that someday somebody will try to understand them.  Don't you understand that doing this to the two of them doesn't help your Oppas at all?! Don't you see that you're only hurting them all?! If the thousands of you that are here can't seem to notice any of that, then every single one of you is just PRETENDING TO BE ELF!" 

"How do you know?! You say all of this stuff, but you don't know any more than the rest of us do!" One of them attacked.

"Because I'm a trainee for SM. Because I see them EVERY day. I see the dark circles under their eyes, and I hear them in their practice rooms, even after almost all of the members have gone home. Because I was given the chance to see what they're really like." My voice rose over the crowd, climbing to decibels even I didn't know I could reach. But now I was out of words. 

Maybe they expected me to say more, because the people around me had stopped chanting. They were all just staring at me, silent. 

"Fine," I said, gritting my teeth, my voice dropping so quiet that I could barely even hear it, "You do whatever you want. But I'm not following you. I'll cheer whatever way I want."

I didn't know what I was doing. The white-hot anger had taken control of my body, my thoughts, my voice. I didn't know what they thought of me, and I didn't care. 

"Saranghaeyo Henry Lau! Saranghaeyo Henry Lau! Saranghaeyo Henry Lau! SARANGHAEYO HENRY LAU!!!!!!" I shouted it at the top of my lungs, but still it couldn't compete with thousands of voices yelling in the same rhythm, but different lyrics.

I looked straight at Henry, screaming as loud as I could, tears so hot that they burned running down my face. Even if he couldn't hear me, I wanted him to know that even if the whole world was against him and Zhou Mi, I would stand by them alone, if I had to. Because I would always be on their side, no matter what. Always.

Even if I got kicked out of SM and forced to return to the United States and live a mediocre and normal life, even if I was severely injured and lying on the brink of death, even if I never had the chance to speak to or see them again... I would support them.

"Saranghaeyo Henry Lau! Saranghaeyo Henry Lau!" The voice wasn't mine. I knew, because I could still hear my own, ringing out clear and true. Surprised, I looked at the girl next to me. She had her hands cupped around and was screaming with me. Noticing that I had seen her, she looked at me and nodded, as if silently communicating, "You were right. Now let's turn this around together."

I heard another voice join in. It was the girl on my left. She elbowed her friend, and soon she began to scream with me, too. 

My own voice broke. Tears were streaming down my face so quickly that my vocal chords couldn't keep up.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It spread like wildfire, magnifying as more and more people changed the words to the song they sang. It was the most incredible miracle I had ever witnessed. I yelled louder, barely able to comprehend what was happening. 

Within moments, the whole audience was resonating with it, even louder than they had been yelling "Thirteen plus two equals zero". The very ground shook with it, drowning out the sound of the speakers. It pounded against the walls of the theater, threatening to escape into the hearts and minds of everyone outside.

I had done it. I had succeeded. And I could look up and see it in the eyes of every single member that stood on that stage. They weren't even performing anymore. Ryeowook was crying. Eunhyuk's makeup was running. Geez, they were such crybabies. Of course, I probably didn't look much better. 

I continued yelling it until the members recovered from their shock.

And then the concert really began.

The moment I stepped into the dressing room after it was all over, I was tackled by a very, very, very appreciative Henry.

"I can't believe what you- Mel, You just- That was amazing! How did you DO that?!" 

"I don't know." True statement. "I didn't know what I was doing. I was just so angry. I just let my emotions take control and somehow that happened." My voice was hoarse from yelling at the top of my lungs for so long. It would probably recover in less than an hour, but right then all I could manage was a scratchy whisper.

Henry hugged tighter. "Can I adopt you? Seriously? Can you just, like, live with us and keep being adorable and the most amazing person ever?"

I was still crying, a little, so I pushed him away and muttered, "I'm not the most amazing person ever. They changed their minds because they hadn't realized that you were amazing until then. All I did was remind them."

I turned to Zhou Mi. "I did it for you, too. Sorry I couldn't cheer for you, but your name didn't fit so well into the fanchant." I tried to laugh, but it came out as a hoarse cough.

He just smiled. "Good work, Queen Be."

Those words meant a lot to me. I had done something good. Really. Truly. I wasn't sure just how much of it was my doing, but I had done even more to earn their trust. I loved my Oppas. All of them.

Even when Siwon sneaks up behind me and picks me up and throws me over his shoulder.

Even when Donghae starts chasing him around the room, with me still on his shoulders.

Even when Sungmin and Ryeowook pull out their phones and start filming it all.

Even when Kyuhyun says, "good work, Jageun," and takes a picture of my tear-filled face, my makeup completely ruined with streams of salt water.

Even when Siwon puts me down on the floor, and I fall over because I'm dizzy, and they all laugh.

Even when they tell Eunhyuk to ask me for the protection pretty quickly, because there was a certain blonde fangirl in the front row that was stealing everyone's hearts. 

Even when they dump out the contents of my purse because they don't believe me when I say that I don't actually have any condoms, and then pick up my bottle of pepper spray and spray it in Sungmin's face, because they think it's perfume, temporarily blinding him.

Even when I'm dumping out the contents of my water bottle onto the Super Junior towel I had recieved for entering the concert, desperately trying to wash the pepper out of Sungmin's beautiful eyes.

Even when Kyuhyun grabs the bottle from Eunhyuk's hands and starts chasing his hyungs around the room with it, now that he knows what it is.

Even when I realize that the coordinators are going crazy trying to get them settled down so they can take care of their makeup.

Even when Wookie demands selcas with me.

Even when the members steal my phone so they can all put their numbers in, but then have to give it to Henry since they can't read English very well.

Even when Henry drops my phone onto the floor because his hands are so sweaty, and the battery pops out and goes flying.

Even when they're all crawling around like dorks, trying to find my phone battery.

Even when Zhou Mi finds it first, but pretends he didn't, sitting down quietly next to me and holding it out, meanwhile watching and laughing at the members who are continuing to look.

Even when Kyuhyun finds out that Zhou Mi found it, and so attacks us both.

Even when their manager comes in and tells them that the fanchant event at the concert has already topped the trending topic list, so they pick me up and put me on top of Zhou Mi and Siwon's shoulders so that my head is almost touching the ceiling.

Even when they carry me all the way to the parking lot that way, like I'm some kind of hero.

Even when they're being complete and total dorks, that should be embarassed by the things they do, but arent. Even when they treat me so much better than I really deserve, and try to stuff me into their van when their manager isn't looking, so that they can take me home with them. Even when their manager demands that they all "get their crazy drunken butts in the car before he leaves them there" and not a single one of them listens to him. Even when they invite me to go to a party with them to celebrate what happened that day, and I have to remind them that I'm underage. Even when their manager apologizes to me for their insanity and tries to explain that this is just how they handle such positive surprises, and I have to explain to him that I've known all that all along, and that I really didn't mind at all. Even when their manager says that he took the liberty of calling a taxi for me, since the members weren't gentlemanly enough to do so, and that he would wait to leave until the taxi arrived for me.

Even when I watch their van leave towards their dorm as my taxi heads the other direction, and I go home and get a text from Henry that says "Goodnight, and thanks for everything, Queen Be."

I love them even when I realize that they are at least six years older than me, and are incredibly busy idols. I love them even when there are thousands of chances that I will disappear from their lives in an instant, yet they still treat me like I am important and worth everything. I love them all, even when the world goes against them, or even just one of them.

Especially then.