Hey everyone, it's me, Mel. I've had a Twitter for a while now, but just haven't used it. I had to make a new one, though, so people can follow my progress as a trainee. I'm still a bit of a rookie, so please treat me well. ^.^

*Ten minutes later*

Henry! Stop spamming me! I do not need random pictures of your feet! And shave them for God's sake; you look like a hobbit.

Zhou Mi- *Spam spam*

Eunhyuk- *Spam spam spam*

Donghae- *spam spam spam spam*

Mel- WOULD YOU GUYS CUT THAT OUT!!!!!!!

*Later that day*

Sorry, everyone, for the clutter on my page. I'm trying to keep useful info about my life as a trainee, which is what people are interested in (Or so I'm told by my company), but I keep getting sent completely random stuff. I do apologize.

Random ELF#1- so jealous! I want to be spammed by Super Junior!

Henry- Do I count? Kekekekeke...

Random ELF#1- O.O

Sungmin- So are we spamming her?

Kyuhyun- Of course we are. Never turn down a request from an ELF. Well, unless she's asking us to give her all of our dirty underwear, move into her apartment, or run away to Timbuktu with her.

Mel- Are you sure you wouldn't do any of those things? *disappointed*

Random ELF#2- What if the ELF was a guy? o.O

Kyuhyun- I don't know. Ask Heechul.

Heechul- WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!

Kyuhyun- Hyung~

Mel- Why are we asking Heechul-oppa? *Confused*

Kyuhyun- I don't know. Just to annoy him.

*Later*

Although my account is supposed to be for people wanting to know more about me as a trainee, I find that a lot of my followers are ELF. I wonder why that is? *Eyes wander down the previous posts on my page* Oh, never mind. Well, if you're an ELF, raise your hand!

Random ELF#1- ME!!! I followed Queen Be before she took down her Queen ELF blog! Still sad...

Random ELF#2- *raises hand*

Random ELF#3- *tentatively raises hand* I've only been an ELF for a few months...

Random ELF#4- *raises hand* Is it okay if I'm a Sone, too?

Random ELF# 5- Of course it's okay; the ELF must support their sisters! 

(47 other comments)

*Next Tweet*

Okay, I love the ELF. I really do. And you're all welcome to hang out on my Twitter and say random stuff. Really. But I've gotten some really negative comments. Seriously, you guys, I'm an international ELF. I'm a thirteen-plus-two supporter. So if all you're going to do is chant "Only thirteen" at me, please get off my page. I mean that in the nicest way possible. We'll all get along that way.

(329 likes, 59 comments, 5 re-tweets)

Hi, my name is Melissa, and my FAVORITE person in the world is Kim Ryeowook! I

Mel- Oppa! Don't hack into my Twitter account!

Ryeowook- What? You left your laptop on the floor.

Mel- I had to go to the bathroom!

*Re-tweeted from Sungmin's Twitter*

Picture 1- Taking beautiful picture of Heechul and Siwon, who are visiting the dorm. 
Picture 2- Oh no! Minsung is trolling them! Wow, such a beautiful expression.   >.<   *Heechul and Siwon still have their nice expressions, unaware of Mel leaning into the picture, crossing her eyes and sticking out her tongue*
Picture 3- Heechul-hyung has discovered her... *Heechul starts running after her; Mel hides behind Kangin*
Picture 4- Kangin-hyung too scared of Heechul-hyung to help Minsung. *Kangin and Mel run different directions*
Picture 5- Minsung hid behind the couch... Hyung creeps up with a bottle of water...
Picture 6- Minsung is completely soaked! Look at her face! XD
Picture 7- Uh-oh, Minsung's mad, and she's grabbed the broom! EVACUATE!!!!!

(Pictures credit to Lee Sungmin's camera.)

Personally, I almost wish he'd caught this on video. It was a bit embarassing (And wet), and I almost regret trolling Heechul-oppa's photo. Although I do admit, it was pretty fun to chase the members around with a broom. 

(208 likes)

Sleeping SuJu members~ Hehehe, this would be adorable, but they're all asleep on the hardwood floor in the living room, so they'll be cranky when they wake up... How do I move them to their rooms? Hmmm...

Random ELF- I volunteer assistance, Queen Be! We shall carry them together!

Mel- Hahaha, thanks for the offer. XD I asked Super Junior's manager to help me. Dragging the members to their beds was harder than I thought! I looked like I was kidnapping them!

*picture of Mel with her arms hooked through Kyuhyun's, dragging him backwards down the hallway*

Oppa sleeps like a rock!

Finally, a picture with the smexy trainee ladies! Heeheehee, it's me, my roommate, Min Hee, SoHee, and the beautiful Kwon Mei. Rocking the selcas!!!

Sleepover in the hallway!!!! Ten of the trainee girls, in their pajamas, playing cards in the hallway. It was a team-building thing, organized by our dance teacher. Lots of fun!

*an hour later*

Uh-oh, EXO interrupted us! RUN! *Picture of several sleepy-looking guys with shocked expressions while giggling girls run away*

Lunch with FASE. Me, Tiffany, Henry, Krystal, Amber, Jessica, and now Kris from EXO! Hahaha, to initiate our new member, we make him pay the bill. XD

*E-mail to Grandpa Henry*

Grandpa,
I just wanted to e-mail and tell you that I'm doing okay. I relied on you a lot for a long time, but I have a job now, and Min Hee and I are starting to be able to stand on our own two feet. I know you've been worried because of my heatlh and my state of being, but I'm really doing okay now. It's not much, but I'm confident in myself now. I'm really thankful to you for everything, and someday I'll pay you back. I hope you can let the family know, too.

-Mel

*E-mail to Em*

Em! I saw B.A.P today! ...don't freak out. God, I can already hear you screaming. Shhh... let me explain. Deep breaths... there. Good. So, since I'm SuJu's housekeeper (I told you about that, right?), Manager Kim has also decided that I can be his assistant. So today SuJu had to go to a special Kpop stage, with a whole bunch of different artists, one of which was B.A.P. Manager Kim wanted me to be there to handle paperwork and run errands for him. So I packed my things and went with the stylist and the staff (Who knew it took so many people to organize one group?), to work with this event. I actually didn't work with Manager Kim much, because the stylist eonni saw that I could do stage makeup, and had me help her most of the time.

Anyway, back to B.A.P. So I saw them when artists were running around backstage. It was a bit chaotic, though, so I didn't get the chance to say anything to them. I wasn't able to kidnap any of them, either, because it was sudden, and i was unprepared. I will prepare a more intricate plan for next time I see them, so I can successfully kidnap them for you. I might use cherry tomatoes and cheesecake as bait. I'm trying, really. 

*Em's e-mail back*

OMG FINALLY!!!! They have been sighted! We will devise a plan with which to kidnap them together! The cherry tomatoes should work on Zelo, and the cheesecake on Daehyun, or "the cute one", as you call him, since I know how much you pay attention to their names, and he's the only one you think is cute. I think you're being silly. Anyway, I think you'll need more than that... hmmm... I shall think on it, and get back to you.

*E-mail to Jacklyn*

SuJu feels a bit weird without Yesung-oppa. All of this time with them, and that absence just seems more and more obvious. Especially when the members wanted to give me a present for working so hard or them, so they asked me which song was my favorite, and I had to say "Well, it's hard to decide, but... well, you can't really sing it without Yesung-oppa..."

They were really curious why not, so I had to explain that I really, really, loved "She's Gone," but that it just wouldn't be right without Yseung-oppa, because it's just K.R.Y.S.D.K... and you seriously CANNOT have KRY without Yesung... So they couldn't do it.

But there are other things, too. Without Leeteuk and Yesung, they're a little lacking in the hilarious fails category. Of course, there are still a few, but it's just not the same. 

Also, you remember how we wondered who would be taking care of Yesung's turtles while he was in the military? Well, as of right now, it's me. XD They're pretty cute, actually, although they're getting big. He already gave Ddangkoma to a zoo because he was getting too big to take care of. Actually, I'm getting a bit attached to these turtles. I think I might keep them. :P

*Jacklyn's response*

I know! It's weird enough just not seeing him onstage, but it must be even weirder seeing them on a daily basis. Like a big sinkhole that just keeps getting bigger. I'm happy that they're still trying to do well, but it's just so obvious that he's gone. But you got a message from him on the album he signed, right? So it's not so bad. :)

Oh, and we're working on another video. :D Just thought you'd like to know. We decided to do B1A4's "Feeling", since you were the one who didn't really like it. But you're not here anymore, and probably can't be a part of our little Youtube group anymore, so... yeah. We're working on the video. I hope you like it when it's done! Maybe next time we'll do a sad song, like BLUE. You remember that cover of BLUE? I think I'm finally able to listen to that song again. So we're looking forward to making "Feeling". I hope you like it, even though you're not in it. :)

*Message to both Ali and Eliz*

SHINee has adopted Min Hee. Just thought you might want to know. She's gone with them all the time (although I'm not entirely sure exactly what she does when she's with them), and they take care of her, like my SuJu oppas do. I'm sure you're both jealous of her. She even has the audacity to not hang out with FASE, even though she's totally an English-speaker (Britsh, remember?). Personally, I'm happy for her, because now I don't feel guilty about spending so much time with SuJu. XD

On the other hand, Key-oppa keeps trying to insist that he should be a member of FASE, but we keep kicking him out. His pronunciation is hilarious.

*Ali's response*

 I'm glad Min Hee is doing well. From what we've seen of her, she seems pretty nice, and we'll support a fellow Shawol. And hey, if I were her, I'd hang out with SHINee, too. ;) As for Key, you guys are mean. Can't you just let him in?

*Eliz's response*

Yeah, I'm pretty jealous. It almost makes me want to audition for SM, just so I can be like her. Almost. I'm still not giving up my health for the robot-maker. As for Key, yeah, his English can be pretty funny. You probably shouldn't let him in. :P

*Message from James*

I'm following you on Twitter, Mel. Hahahahahaha, stalking you! Just kidding. But seriously, your relationship with idols is hilarious. Sometimes I forget that you're still just a trainee. I think your Korean is getting better than mine. Congrats! You're doing so well! Actually, I think it's really funny how you keep bouncing back and forth between English and Korean, like you can't pick one.

So anyway, I'm actually sending you this to ask you for something. So... SMTown's coming up really soon, and New York's one of the stops, and I think I might be able to go, so...do you think you could, you know, network for me, so I can get a good ticket? Because I know they'll sell out really fast...

I know it's a bit unfair to use you like this, but... I REALLY want to go. So please?