a/n :

italics = thoughts

Eunha stared at the puppies in front of her. She watched them playing with each other. Eunha chuckled, “Cute, puppies are cute—“ she stopped midway because she remembered. She remembered of words from the past. “You are like a cute puppy, Eunha. My cute puppy.” words which followed by a light caressed on her chin. Like that, Eunha felt a sense of loss. Because it doesn’t seem like Sowon’s going to say that or play or be with her ever again.

Why is it turning like this? Why—

Eunha sighed. She leaned back on the chair. She’s at home. But, strangely, she felt restless. Something, she didn’t know what, something’s missing. She threw her gaze around the yard, at the familiar scenery she has been seeing for years, and she wondered about the emptiness inside her heart.

She turned her head up. The moon was there, the stars were there, the clouds were there. Nothing changed. Except that their family has some new members in the form of puppies. Envy engulfed her heart when she saw the puppies and their parents. “Your parents are in love. And their relationship is love love,” Eunha muttered, “Me too, want to be love love—“

Eunha put one of the puppies on her lap. “You know,” Eunha started to converse, “That person—I really don’t get what’s inside her mind!” Eunha huffed while the puppy just blinked at her. “She’s being—she’s always here—and then suddenly she’s gone—“ Eunha closed her eyes. “I am not sure what I have been doing—what did I do that hurt her—“ Eunha looked at the puppy. “I hurt her. I don’t know how—but, I did. I did. Even when I have promised myself to never hurt her—I still managed to do that, heh—what an idiot—“ Eunha chuckled bitterly. “I miss her. I miss her a lot—“

Sounds of door being opened halted Eunha’s from her rant. A light tap on her shoulder made Eunha turned her head. She found her older sister there.

“What are you doing?” her older sister asked.

“Nothing, just—just playing with the puppies.”

“Uhuh, and the salt is salty.”

“Unnie, what—“

“Spill it, what’s on your mind? You looked like you are in trouble.”

Eunha opened . She paused then closed it again. Her sister was taking another puppy and played with it.

“It isn’t about me. It’s my friend.”

“Uhuh. What’s wrong with your friend?”

“Um…my friend is fighting with um—the love of their life—but, my friend isn’t sure what’s wrong. One thing that my friend knows is that somehow they managed to hurt this person that they’ve loved. In love with. And then now they rarely talk. Because suddenly there’s this wide gap between them. Because, suddenly that person started to avoid my friend.”

“What does your friend wanted to do?”

“I—um, I mean my friend,” Eunha flustered but her sister wasn’t even looking at her, “My friend wants them to be okay. Because she could see that it’s hurting them both. My friend is hurting but the person that my friend’s in love with, is hurting even more.”

“What kind of person that your friend’s in love with?” her sister turned to her, “The person’s your friend in love with sounds like a jerk because that person just started avoiding your friend—“

“NO! Soju—“ Eunha managed to catch herself. “That person isn’t a jerk! That person is kind and gentle. Like, that person has the warmest hands and heart. And even if it’s hurting her, she still put others first, which I—my friend found endearing and frustrating at the same time. And even when this person is so amazing, she’s still, something inside her is, she’s often doubts herself. Of her own abilities, of whether she deserved to be loved or not. But, she is. She deserves the world.” Eunha paused to take a breath, “You know, black. Black is the color that my friend used to associate with darkness, with charcoal burnt and murky. Something that wasn’t warm.

“Then this person happened. This person with black eyes, and suddenly black is shifted. Its meaning from dark and burnt turned into one of warmth, like cups of coffee, or the galaxy. Like that, my friend founds black to be high on her favorite colors. And this person is very funny too. And sweet and you know sun and all it’s warmth? That person is like that.

“And she’s also like a moon. Ah no, rather than sun, she’s more like a moon. Because it’s always there. Always, silently, quietly, accompanying and with its light, it shines the night. Without it, everything would lose its way.” Eunha looked up.

Her sister chuckled. Eunha turned to her, confused.

“Your collections of black colored stuffs are rising in amount,” her sister stated absentmindedly.

“Unnie—“

“Ah, must be nice being young and in love,” her sister said, “You know, when we’re in love, it feels like everything, everything is ours. Like we’re holding a universe in our hands.” her sister pointed at the sky. “But, then something happened, and like a tsunami, we’re left with nothing. Nothing. Not even a speck of dust. Funny how something so—so—“ her sister frowned, “So sweet! Something so sweet could turn into something so bitter in just a matter of minutes. Heaven to hell.”

Eunha stayed silent.

“If your friend feels guilty because it sounds like your friend’s so sure that she has been hurting this person, then maybe this friend should talk to this person. You know, apologize and stuffs? Even when that person might be avoiding your friend, even then, your friend who thought of this person as the love of their life, this friend might need to fight harder, no? Just moping around wouldn’t solve anything, you know?”

Eunha blinked.

“I am sleepy, I will go to sleep now,” her sister yawned. “Oh I almost forget.”

Eunha turned her head to her sister who crouched down beside her. “This person that your friend loves, how does this person look like? Tall? Short? Your height?”

Eunha blinked. “What’s with your question, unnie? But, the answer is tall.”

“How tall?”

“Very tall, like a giraffe.”

“Are they meeting often? Working together?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Nothing, just asking.” Her sister stood up again. “Good luck.”

Eunha frown. Her sister was up to something. She’s about to ask when her sister closed the door and disappear into their home.

--

Eunha peeked into the room that Sowon shared with Yerin. She found Yerin’s empty bed and Sowon, who was already sleeping with her body facing the wall. She tiptoed quietly to Sowon’s bed. She lied down beside Sowon.

At first she just stared at Sowon’s back. Her finger lightly traced on Sowon’s back. She’s tracing their names and the words of ‘love’.

She whispered in a hushed tone. “Love, you know, it used to be just a word to me. Just a word. Until you. It’s just a word until you.” Eunha pinched Sowon’s t-shirt with her thumb and index finger. She wanted to be in contact with Sowon but at the same time, she wasn’t sure how to hold Sowon. “And home was just a place made with bricks until you. Until you, unnie.” Eunha closed her eyes.

Minutes passed between them.

“Sometimes, I wonder if you are really in love with me or with the way I made you feel. The way that I love you as if you are the center of my world. And you are, Eunbi. You are,” Sowon whispered.

Eunha’s eyes snapped opened. “I love you. I—unnie you—“ Eunha tried to put what she thought into words. “I told the puppies about you. I told them about you. Because you are the one that I want. The hands that I want to hold on to. The one I want to sit with during rides. When I found delicious food or a new restaurant, it’s you that I want to bring with. You, unnie.” Eunha wished Sowon would turn and look at her.

Sowon pressed the wall with her hand. Eunha long to hold it.

“Sometimes I saw the way you look at her and I wish I didn’t see the fireworks flashing in your eyes,” Sowon said softly.

“Who are you talking about, unnie?”

Sowon pulled her hand away from the wall, but, Eunha caught it midway. Now their position was a little awkward. Eunha was hovering above Sowon, she’s putting all of weight on her right arm which she placed on the bed. Eunha hoped her hand wouldn’t fail her and ended up falling onto Sowon, while her left hand was on Sowon’s hand.

“Unnie, look at me?”

Sowon did as she’s asked.

“Unnie, I don’t know about fireworks. All that I know is, the fact that you are the person that I think of when I heard the songs they played on the radio. You are the one that I want to be with all the time. I feel safe when it’s with you. The one person that I want in every sense of words, it’s you. It’s always been you. Only you.” Eunha’s words were dripping with sincerity she hoped she could convey to Sowon.

Sowon turned her body, in the process, she accidentally pushed Eunha’s right hand which gave in to the pressure and let Eunha fell onto Sowon who’s hands were ready to catch her. “Like this, unnie. I fall for you like this. And you, you catch me, always.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, Sojung-unnie.” Eunha peered into Sowon’s dark eyes and in there, she found it, the one that she’s been missing, her home. “I love you.”

“I miss you.” Sowon traced her hand along Eunha’s cheek. “And it hurts. I love you.”

“I am sorry. I am sorry. I am sorry—“

“Okay. It’s okay. I am sorry too, I should have talked about it—“

“No, it’s my fault—“

“No, Eunha—“

--

“Oh, for hell’s sake! Just kiss and make up already! How long are you two going to be sorry this sorry that? Tsk!” SinB commented from the door.

“SinB, let them be. It’s been days, they have been like this for days,” Yerin said.

“Tsk, alright. Let’s just go and play game, you are invited as the special guest in my games live, today,” SinB said cheerily.

“How long have you two been there—“ Sowon started to ask.

“Since the ‘Unnie, look at me?’ The sappiness is going to kill me,” SinB pretended to gag.

“And you have promised to go out to eat with me, SinB. So after that?” Yerin asked. She has started to close the door to her room. “You two just stay here and like do whatever you used to do when I am not there,” Yerin winked. She closed the door hurriedly when a doll was thrown her way.

Yerin winced when she heard a loud thud once the door was closed behind her.

“That’s the way it should be,” SinB said.

Yerin nodded, “Yeah, the way it should be.”

SinB smiled brightly. “I will tell Yewon about it, she has been wringing her hands being worried about them.”

Yerin pecked Sinb’s cheek. “Like you weren’t.”

SinB flushed. “An—anyway, let’s start the gaming live now—“

Yerin chuckled, she hooked their arms together. “Alright, let’s go on our live then we could go on our dinner date.”

SinB was actually getting slightly, just slightly full for meats, but if Yerin wanted them to eat it for their date, well then, she would eat as much meat as Yerin wanted to.

--

Eunha laid her cheek on Sowon’s stomach. “Unnie, I don’t know about fireworks, really. And the heck to fireworks. Because, unnie, you always remind me of the gentle things. Like the oversized sweaters which warm and comfortable. When we’re holding hand, when we leaned on each other, you are like a safety, like a band aid. When things seemed bleak and hard, you, just with you are enough to make everything’s okay. You know then she sun sets or rises? The beauty of it are similar when your whole face light up when you smile. You are like that, unnie.”

“Could you move a mountain for me?” Sowon asked. A small smile on her face.

Eunha blinked. “I don’t know how to do that, but, I could try. If that’s what you wanted, I will find a way for it, unnie.”

Sowon laughed. “Alright. No, I don’t want to the mountain to be moved. Just stay by my side is enough.”

Eunha smiled. “That, that’s the one I told you before. But, I am wrong. The way your face light up when you laugh is more beautiful than any sunrise or sunset.”

Sowon laughed harder. She cupped Eunha’s cheek. “You are spending too much time with Yerin.”

Eunha processed to wink then grinned.

“Come closer and kiss me,” Sowon said.

Eunha complied in a flash. “This too, I miss kissing you like this,” Eunha said after they kissed.

“Kiss me again then,” Sowon said.

And kiss her Eunha did.

--

Because sometimes

Love feels like coming home

Instead of

The grandiose of fireworks

Or the exploding of the stars

Sometimes

Love is just the gentle wind

And soft whisper of

“I love you”

And the promise of moving a mountain

That’s what you feel

The feeling of coming home

That there’s where you belong all along

a/n :

(´ ᴗ｀✿)

thank you for reading and commenting till now <3