A/N :

italic = thought

Yerin was laying her head down on Sowon’s lap while the older girl was playing with her hands and tummy. Yerin thought that Sowon was poetry. A poetry she couldn’t finish. Could never finish. Because Sowon wasn’t her. Isn’t hers to keep. Will never be her to keep. As butterflies flied from her stomach into every part of her body, Yerin reached for Sowon’s hand to give it a light tug.

“Hm?” Sowon’s brows arched into a silent question.

“Unnie…do you know…that sometimes…just sometimes though,” Yerin said softly, “Do you know that sometimes I like you? That sometimes butterflies are flying wildly when it’s about you?”

Sowon was smiling but otherwise she didn’t say anything.

“And you know what it makes me feel?” Yerin asked.

Sowon titled her head then she’s petting Yerin’s hair gently, kindly.

“It makes me happy. Really happy. Like, my heart is going to burst into all of these tiny pieces of shattered heart?”

Sowon was still petting Yerin’s hair silently.

“As the rush of happiness cooled down…another rush of pain come barreling inside. This heart has been shattered into lots of tiny pieces that I don’t even know how to glue it together. How to make it whole again.”

Sowon was smiling at her sadly. And Yerin’s tiny heart, it has been started to crack now.

“The funny thing is, I know full well that I should have been moving on from you already. I don’t get why all of these stubborn butterflies who could only fly for you died already? Why? Because I couldn’t have you and I know you wouldn’t have me. Because you only want her.”

Yerin knew that she’s rambling now. But, Sowon was still staring at her with her sadsadsad eyes. And kind smile and it hurts and she’s still not saying anything.

“I know what is good for me. I know that.” Yerin kept on repeating her words while the older girl was pulling her into a tight hug. “I don’t regret ever fall for you, unnie. You are like the taste of cakes I ate, the taste of pastries, the burnt and sweet one. Your smile is the one that filled up the air that I forget to breath when I see it. Unnie was with me when I am at my—when everything was so dark, you were there.”

Sowon was still hugging her tightly while Yerin sobbed into her shoulder.

“How could I not fall for you? Everything in me, the veins in me, all are spreading love for you. And I fall, unnie. I fall and fall and fall and I don’t know where I will land. Will I ever land somewhere? Unnie, you are the dawn who has been sweeping me over. And I fall through it, through the dawn.”

Sowon was patting her back. And Yerin was suddenly wishing for the storm to come. The thundering sky and the scary flashing light. So that it will drown all of her words away. But, there’re no storm, no thundering sky, no nothing. There’s only Sowon and her sad eyes and kind smile. And her. The one who couldn’t move on completely from her first love.

“Yerin…someday you could, you know? It’s a slow process. But, you could do it. Someday, you could look at me and not feeling those butterflies fly. I know it will stop flying for me.”

Yerin’s only answer was a subtle nod. Yerin has been saying to herself back then, that she’ll move on. And she knew that she should. Really really should. And it’s baby steps but Yerin was moving on. Or trying her best to move on.

--

And then the cameras started to flash. It’s time for them to perform at the concert. And with a sad smile, Sowon pulled her toward the stage. Yerin let herself being dragged while she composed herself and smiled at Sowon.

--

Eunha was just lying lazily on the bed while Sowon was being busy in the bathroom. Japan was pretty at night and Eunha’s heart was fluttering at the little photo sessions and their concert just few hours ago.

“Eunha, want to take a bath first?” Sowon asked once she came out of the bathroom.

“Nah,” was Eunha’s simple answer.

“Alright then,” Sowon was saying, just as simple.

Eunha felt the bed was weighted down a bit, she turned to look at Sowon who has been climbing the bed.

“Lift your hands,” Sowon commended.

Curious as to why, Eunha followed Sowon’s commend. What she didn’t expect was for Sowon to lift her up from the bed. Squealing in surprise, Eunha could only stared in horror when Sowon was looking like she’s going to let Eunha fell down the full tub.

“Unnie!” Eunha exclaimed in surprise. She’s hugging Sowon’s neck like a koala does, tight and suffocating.

Sowon was still hovering on top the tub. Eunha knew that if Sowon was letting go, she’ll fall into the water, so she’s tightening her hold around Sowon’s neck. “Unnie! Unnie don’t do this! Are you going to let me fall into the water like this?!”

Sowon was laughing. “Yes, I will.”

Eunha gaped at the answer. And slowly Sowon was stepping into the tub as well. And making a move as if she’s going to let Eunha fell. “UNNIE!”

But, all that Sowon did was letting her feet touch the water gently. And letting her stand in the water. “It’s only your feet. Don’t make that expression, come sit on the tub.” Sowon was patting the space beside her.

“Unnie? What are we doing?”

Sowon was handing her a glass of something red. Before a bottle was being poured down into the tub as well, turning the water red.

“It’s grape juice in your glass. It’s also grape juice in the tub,” Sowon was explaining. “It could help you relax. Today, we have a long day.” Sowon ended her explanation with a smile. The smile which always make Eunha weak on her knees.

And maybe it’s the effect of the wine—no, grape juice, that she’s drinking but suddenly her heart was bursting with love and happiness and giddiness. And, in turn, she’s clashing her lips against Sowon’s. She’s feeling so thankful for Sowon. For being so sweet and loving. And for being everything. For being Sowon, for being her girlfriend.

Soon though, the bath and the wine—grape juice was being forgotten as Eunha was too busy kissing Sowon who was busy kissing her back. And hands were flying everywhere. And the bathroom become too hot for both of them.

Eunha was sitting on Sowon’s lap when she’s slipping and fall into the tub, pulling Sowon with her, splashing water everywhere. After the ‘are you okay? do you hit your head?’ both looked into each other and burst out laughing.

Sowon was kissing her nose lightly. “You, take a bath first. I’ll take a bath later.”

Eunha whined and pulled Sowon toward her, preventing her to leave. “Unnie, just take a bath with me. Let’s take a bath together. It’s faster and we could cuddle sooner.”

Sowon scratched the back of her head, seemingly contemplating Eunha’s suggestion.

“Unnie, you are already drenched anyway.”

“Alright then.”

--

Needless to say that the supposedly fast bath was actually going longer than either of them has predicted before.

--  

Yerin was playing with SinB’s fingers. While the later just letting her do as she please. SinB wasn’t blind, she knew that something was happening to Yerin. Because she could see the stars in Yerin’s eyes dimmed. wait, stars?? what are you, SinB, a poet?! so damn cheesy.

Yerin looked at SinB who’s smiling at her. In turn, Yerin smiled as well. And suddenly SinB didn’t really mind being cheesy because Yerin’s eyes do have stars inside it and it’s beautiful. And SinB’s heart? It’s beating hard.

--

a/n :  ｡◕‿◕｡

enjoy and thank you for reading and commenting~