Chapter 19

Department X

Hours later, Taeyeon finally staggered out of her room looking visibly drained. She was dressed in a turtleneck sweater even though the weather forecast had predicted the day to be one of the hottest days in the whole of the summer. She tugged at her sweater uncomfortably trying to fan herself through the thick wool of the sweater as she sweated profusely. She went down to the cafe to grab a cold drink and noticed that Sooyoung and Yoona had already woken up a long time ago and was playing computers games in their favourite corner of the cafe. The both of them were obviously cheating as each of them had the program known as visual studio opened and their fingers were busily typing lines of codes out. Taeyeon took at look at Yoona and Sooyoung's screen as she exclaimed. "Sooyoung, since when did Mario have unlimited lives and cannon guns that shoots turtles at people. And Yoona, since when did Mario become indestructible, can run through walls  and fly?

"The two of them turned from their furious codings and realised that Taeyeon was standing behind them. They greeted Taeyeon unnie together as Sooyoung noticed Taeyeon tugging uncomfortably at her sweater. "Unnie, aren't you hot? Why are you wearing this sweater in this kind of weather?" Trying to help Taeyeon, Sooyoung tried turning down the turtleneck for her but Taeyeon put up a strong fight and and prevented her from doing so.  Yoona looked at Taeyeon unnie and found her to be really weird. "Taeyeon unnie, are you sure you are fine? We past by your room just now and kept hearing lots of screaming sounds coming out from it" Putting a hand on Taeyeon's forehead Yoona asked concernly, "Taeyeon unnie, do you have a fever or something? Why are you turning red and why is your face so hot?"  Deciding that Taeyeon must be feeling feverish. Yoona decided to help her feel better. Motioning to Sooyoung to hold her down, Yoona forcefully tugged down the turtleneck part of the sweater revealing a neck that was covered in red marks. Yoona pointed at the red marks and exclaimed in shock as Hyoyeon who past by at that particular moment wowed and oohed at the obvious looking love bites on Taeyeon's neck. "Whats that unnie? Why is your neck covered in red marks?" Taeyeon mumbled something about being bitten by ertic bed bugs as Sunny walked down the stairs smirking at Taeyeon's remarks.

=================================================================================================

Jessica ran out of the cafe's door and saw Yuri's car waiting for her at the driveway. Yuri was dozing off in the car seat when Jessica finally opened the door and sat on the co driver's seat beside her, Gently leaning over, Jessica gave her a peck on her cheek, waking her up from her slumber.  Smiling at Jessica, Yuri rubbed the tiredness from her eyes as she leaned over to give Jessica a hug. "You are finally here. Sorry I fell asleep waiting for you." Jessica hugged Yuri tightly as she apologises for her lateness. Yuri smiled as she slowly carressed Jessica's hair "I have been waiting my whole life for someone like you to appear, so whats an hour." Leaning in, she kissed Jessica gently on the lips as they melted into the passion that radiated around them.

Yuri stopped the car in front of a museum and excitedly dragged Jessica in. Rows and rows of painting covered the walls and sculptures of all form and sizes littered the place causing Jessica to stiffle a yawn as she forsaw an afternoon of boredom lying ahead of her. Yuri dragged Jessica from painting to painting and told her all about the history and presentation skill of the artwork or artist as Jessica tried her hardest to appear interested. By the time they reached oil painting number 23, Jessica was bored out of her wits as she struggled to stay awake. The stiffling heat of the summer and the chirping crickets outside certainly didn't help as she mentally slapped herself for the Nth number of time. Yuri saw Jessica cover to stiffle a yawn as her eyes slowly glazed over and she seem spaced out and silently smiled.

Bringing Jessica in front of room that was in the corner of the museum, she snapped her fingers to get Jessica's attention. "This room contains the most precious and the prettiest painting to me in the world. Jessica stiffled another yawn as she imagined to be probably another combination of Mona Lisa and The scream, or probably just another oil painting that had histories and stories behind it. Opening the door to the room, she was greeted by the most beautiful sight in the world. It was a giant wall painting of a smiling Jessica. Soft lights reflected on the wall casting a natural lighting on the painting in front of her. The background was covered with realistic looking flowers of different size, shape and types. Yuri gently wrapped her arms from behind Jessica as she took in the painting that was in front of her. "Do you like this painting? I spent 3 weeks drawing it."Jessica nodded as she stared in awe of the painting in front of her. "So whats the title for this painting called." Yuri smiled as she leaned her head on Jessica's shoulder. "Tu es l'amour de ma vie. Translated into english it means, You are the love of my life."

Like this story? Give it an Upvote!
Thank you!

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
colleenorcullo
#1
Chapter 55: SooNa is so sweet T~T
Taengoo311
#2
Chapter 68: Umm why no updates? D:
SunnyandTae
#3
Chapter 32: New reader. Love where it's going. I'm up to the Christmas special and love it. It's written so well. I can't wait to finish :)
badtestament #4
Wuuthraad : Hahaha, well. Not everything will go to their food binges. I will have a part 3 to explain what they did with the money
badtestament #5
Forever9 : Haha, *evil gleams somemore* Maybe I should tell Youngie about your suspicious love for rilakuma.. *rubs hands in glee* YAH dongsaeng, wae you no update childcare chaos... *prepares the darts you loaned me*
Wuuthraad
#6
I now feel bad for Kim Tae Woo, now that he's going to jail and all his cash is going to fund SooNa food binges XD
badtestament #7
Vedasone : Thanks for the comments. =) Really thanks.

Mashipao : I will post my reply on your wall ok?? =D Thanks for reading my fanfic and thanks even more for your detailed comments and improvement suggestions
MashiPao
#8
S: LAST COMMENT! I SWEAR! XD
While reading your story, I noticed the pros and cons of your writing. So I want to give you some advice to make your fic better and your writing overall. :P
First of all, you do research on your topics. Which is really good. it's very easy to tell that you did your research on the guns and whatnot. In fact, would you mind helping me with that kind of stuff? LOl The amount of information within your story (and the gun explanations in the sequel) clearly show the amount of research you did. Few authors do this large amount of research so kudos to you!
Next, you have AMAZING vocabulary and details. ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. Although, your sentences can get a bit awkward at times, it doesn't hide the fact that your details are amazing. However, I think that all the details you have are like a double-edged sword in a sense. It's really great to read a fic with such amazing detail but sometimes it gets...tedious. Your updates are rather short so all I can see is giant paragraph after paragraph. And honestly, it makes me feel like I'm reading an essay instead of a story. So I would recommend maybe taking your giant paragraphs and separating them into smaller ones. That way, it's much easier to read. Not a lot of people want to read giant blocks of text.
Also, your details and whatnot overpower your dialogue. You have more details than you have dialogue. In my opinion, dialogue is what makes a story and fleshes out the characters' personalities. So perhaps add more dialogue into your story?
You have problems writing dialogue as well which is awfully strange because I see you doing it the right way and then you mostly do it the wrong way...such as in Chapter 47. You squish all of your dialogue into one paragraph which is incorrect. (And it causes many readers to run away LOL) There must be a new paragraph every time a new person speaks.
So I'm done. Whew that took a long time to type up. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and found my comments useful~
MashiPao
#9
Moving on to the next comment! LOL I don't know...I might hit a new high and have to write three comments. I still have much to say. :P Just a heads up, I read teh sequel too so I'll be squishing everything in the comments here. XD
Anyway, continuing about Tiffany. Thumbs up for continuity. I noticed you still had pink dossiers in your sequel. Hehe sorry I just like it when the author stays consistent. I always have smile on my face every time Tiffany enters the cafe: walks/runs in like a boss then glomps everyone. XD (Also yay for slight Taenyish moment in the sequel haha).
Moving on to the highlight of the story that I found the most amusing: Jessica's and Taeyeon's test to get into Department X. Haha it was great. Cucumbers and roasted cockroaches? Wow. Must've been hell. The examiners weren't very smart when they decided not to tie up Jessica's feet. XD Aso I love the background of the Cafe with No Name. I LOL'd at such the lame name and LOL'd even harder when you said "Taeyeon's creativeness". Nice Touch. :)
Moving on the main plot of the story, I must say the Department X definitely have their feet stuck in a pile of crap. Especially Sooyoung. D: It was so sad when she left. Also, I was so surprised at the end when Seohyun drugged Hyoyeon. Why SEOHYUN? WHY? T_T Honestly, I never expected Seohyun of all people. She's too nice and stuff. But you know, the nicest people are probably the most evil and sinister (Does that make me evil? LOL). Going into the sequel, I wonder if Sunny and Hyomin will really fall in love with each other especially since Hyomin is taking such good care of Sunny in the hospital...while Sunny's lover is sulking around, seeking Tiffany for refuge...Shame, Taeyeon. If Sunny caught you, she might have to request you to get into bed immediately. XD Hehe I'm an avid Taeny fan so I'm content with the Taeny development. :P But anyway, Seohyun, why are you so EVIL?! T_T Evil! D: Augghhh...Well, I'm running out of space again. LOL