Haneul’s POV

My palm roamed the part of the bed where Junhyung was supposed to be, instead all I felt was empty. I opened one side of my eye to scan the room.

“Jun…~” I called out.

No response.

“Jun…~” I called out again as I forced myself to sit up.

I rubbed my face against my palms, waking myself up.

“Jun?” I looked around the room to find only myself in it.

“Where did he go to?” I muttered to myself as I took a glance at the time.

4.30AM.

I felt my feet for my slippers only to find that it was gone, leaving only his around. I slide my feet into his bigger ones and dragged myself out of the room.

“Jun~ Jun~ Jun~” I called out as I walked around, looking for him.

It was not difficult to spot him in this empty area. He was sitting on the concrete floor, head against the pillar, facing the field, hugging his knees.

“Sir, I lost my husband. I assume you have been here for quite awhile and my husband is a handsome man not to be missed. Did you happen to see him?” I asked, as I squat down next to him.

He let out a smile and ruffled my hair.

“What are you doing awake?” He asked.

“I said it, I lost my husband.” I said.

He pinched my cheek and looked away with a sigh, clearly not in the mood for jokes.

“What’s wrong?” I asked as I sat down next to him.

“I don’t know.” He said with a slight pout.

I raised my hand to pat his head, smoothing his hair.

“Junhyung,” I called out.

He looked at me with slightly widened eyes, perhaps surprised that I did not call him by his pet name.

“Things are going to happen. Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. We cannot avoid death, misfortunate, chaos and all sort of so-called bad stuff. Just because you are afraid, does not mean it would not happen. This is life. It’s realistic like that.” I said.

He stared at me, looking so much like a little puppy.

I paused, and took a few seconds to rethink if I should continue. My words might hurt him, and that was the last thing I ever wanted to do. But I spoke anyway, because if I did not take position as the ‘bad person’ to spill the truth to him, then who?

“I know your worries without having you to spell it out, and I don’t want to lie to you and give you some sugar-coated crap. But I’ll give you an option, because choice is our rightful freedom in this world that is only free in name. Do you want to hear me, or not?” I asked.

He bit his lower lip.

“I wouldn’t get angry and divorce you just because you said no, so don’t worry.” I laughed.

He smiled slightly, but nodded his head.

“Is that a no?” I .

“No!! I mean… yes!! What am I saying? Tsk!” He pouted.

I pinched his pouted lips.

“So, are you ready?” I asked.

He nodded.

“People will hate on you. People who have hated you before will hate you even more, and perhaps some people who once liked you will start to hate you. You will be bashed, you will be insulted, you might get denied on shows, your reputation will or rather have suffered greatly, you might even get hurt physically. You will feel miserable, you will regret stepping out of this place. You would wish that you could stay here forever. You would want to turn back time and hide here for the rest of your life.” I said.

His eyes started to water.

I wiped away his tears with the pad of my thumb.

“But you will recover. You will be well again. Because, people who loved you will continue to love you even more. You will be protected and supported.  It is a scary world out there, darling, no doubt, but what do you have to fear when you have a whole freaking army behind your back? Reputation can be build back by proving to them that while you made some mistakes, you have changed for the better and you are worthy of their love and trust again. Bashings and insults, if seen in another way, might jolly well be useful information for you to improve yourself. I’ll filter them for you, no worries. If you get hurt physically, I’ll dress your wounds. When you feel miserable, my shoulder is yours to cry on and my arms are yours to hide in.” I said.

“And of course, there will still be this exceptional handful of people who will dedicate their life into hating you, but Yong Junhyung, if you let that small percentage of people affect you so much and neglect the bigger percentage who love you to death, then you have some serious problems with your managing of priorities.” I continued.

“What is an idol without a bunch of haters? Only idols who aren’t recognized have no haters. And you know why some people hate on others for seemingly no reason at all?” I asked.

He shook his head.

“Because there’s something that you have that they don’t. Just like when Shin and J bullied you, did you really think that it was always for the fun of it? When the s back in school bullied you, was it really just because you were an easy target? Remember the times when we watch dramas together and I say I don’t like the actress or actor, and when you asked why, I said I don’t like his or her face. Did you really think it is that simple? I don’t like their face so I hate them? Really?” I asked.

He looked confused.

“It’s because I was jealous. It’s because they perhaps have the legs or body I desire so much. But most of the time it is just because they were kissing the actor I like.” I admitted.

His eyes widened.

“Nawww~ But I only want to kiss you!” I squeezed his cheeks.

“But what I am trying to say is, Junroro, don’t let haters put you down. Do not give up without even taking the first step just because you fear you will fall. We are all bound to get hurt in some way or another, but darling, we are capable of healing and picking ourselves up again. How many tries did you think it took you to learn how sit up, crawl, walk and finally run? Your baby-self is so strong-minded. I am sure strong-mindedness is in born in you, you just got to go deeper and look for it. We are not humpty dumpty where when once we fall we cannot get up. We’re roly-poly, we’ll fall but we’ll spring back up again even before anyone can blink their eye. We’re that fast and capable like that.” I said.

“But… my mom said I was a lazy baby. No matter how she tried to get me to sit up, crawl or walk, I would just lie there.” He said sticking out his tongue playfully.

“That is the strongest form of determination. You see, you have it in you. You were so determined to not move an inch that no one could move you. Bring that determination out and apply it to the situation now. Go back out there, face the ing world and not move a freaking inch even if the world chases you away with a broom. They’ll soon realize that Yong Junhyung is here to stay and he’s not moving no matter what. You and the world can have a battle on determination and I bet with my life that you’ll win.” I said.

He looked down, grinning.

“You trust me so much?” He asked.

“Of course.” I smiled.

“When it comes to laziness, no one can beat Yong Junhyung.” I continued.

His smile turn into a shock.

“I AM NOT!!!!!!!!” He shouted, startling me.

“SHHH! Are you crazy?” I hissed, covering his move.

“I’m not lazy.” He pouted.

“Alright, alright. You’re just conserving your energy for a rainy day. I’m sorry, I misunderstood.” I said.

He laughed and smacked me in his usual girly manner.

“How is it that you can punch so well but smack like a girl?” I asked.

“I think it’s very manly.” He said, smacking me again.

I strongly believe that he must have learnt a different definition for the word ‘manly’ as the rest of the world.

I rested my head against his shoulder, hugging his arm. I giggled to myself when I saw the bunny slippers he wore.

“You like it, don’t you? You just don’t want to admit.” I said, pointing at the bunny slippers which was supposed to be mine.

I brought it there and kept it in his room just in case I stayed over at times. But I did realize that it has been worn a few times for it seemed a little grey.

“Only because it is yours.” He said, flicking the bunny ears.

I rested my head on my knees, looking at him.

“I wear them when you’re not with me.” He said.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because I am lonely, and it makes me feel like you are here with me.” He said.

“You wear me on your feet? How sweet.” I .

“Stop teasing meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~” He whined.

“Alright, alright. Sorry.” I chuckled.

“But I don’t appreciate being on your feet.” I again.

He cursed under his breath and kicked the bunny slippers away, sending them flying across the field.

“YONG JUNHYUNG! GO PICK IT UP NOW!” I yelled, shoving him forward.

I must have shocked him by my loudness because he almost fell face first onto the grass, but managed to pick himself up quickly, then ran like a little penguin barefooted into the field to collect the bunny slippers. He put them on and then ran back to me again, looking even cuter with the bunny ears dancing wildly in the wind as he ran.

***
Junhyung looked at me. I held his hand under the table, squeezing it tightly. Across us were Shin and J, looking curiously at us.

“Is something wrong?” Shin asked.

“Hyung, is Haneul pregnant?” J asked in a really hushed voice.

“NO!” Junhyung yelled, smacking the boy on his head really roughly. Now, that is what I call a manly smack.

Shin and I burst into laughter.

“YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO DO THAT!!” J shouted, holding onto his head.

“Who asked you to sprout nonsense?” Junhyung said.

“Is it not possible when the both of you were mmmpppfff!!!” Junhyung covered J’s mouth and dragged him aside.

Shin and I watch as Junhyung’s arm circled around J’s neck, holding him in place as he said something to the boy we could not hear.

“What did you and hyung do?” Shin asked, curiously.

“What? Nothing!” I said, but I know better that my redden cheeks would have given it away.

Shin just smiled.

Junhyung returned shortly dragging J behind him. He shot J a warning glare before settling down next to me.

“So, what is it? I mean, why did you call us here? Is there some event that you want us to plan? I’m not a good planner.” Shin said.

“Is it another soccer match against whichever place? I’m so tired of soccer, can we do basketball? Or can we do like some eating competition?” J asked.

Junhyung lowered his head, biting his lower lip. His grip on my hand tightened, as he got more nervous.

“I…” Junhyung finally manage to get some sound out of his throat.

As much as I wanted to do it on his behalf, I knew he had to do this on his own.

Shin and J looked at me, confused. Then, J looked away.

“Hyung, you’re leaving, am I right?” He asked, not looking at us.

Junhyung’s head snapped up, eyes widened.

“Hyung, you’re leaving? When?” Shin asked, trying very hard to not sound surprise, but it was obvious in his tone.

“Yea. I… I’m leaving. I mean… I have decided.. I.. Tomorrow.” Junhyung stuttered.

“TOMORROW!?” Shin yelled.

“It’s good. Finally. Isn’t this what you have been waiting for?” J asked, finally facing us.

“Yea, but…” Junhyung said.

“Congrats, hyung.” J smiled a forced smile.

“J…” Junhyung tried to hold his hand, but he pulled away, leaving Junhyung obviously hurt by that action.

“I’m really happy for you, hyung.” J said as he got up and walked off.

“J!” Junhyung ran after him.

Shin and I got up and followed. J opened his room door and stood outside, his fists clenched. I yelped when J turned and gave Junhyung a punch on his jaw. I almost threw my shoe onto J’s face but how could I bear to do it after seeing his expression and hearing his words?

“I KNOW YOU KNEW YOU COULD LEAVE A LONG TIME AGO, BUT WHY DID YOU NOT TELL US BEFOREHAND!? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO GIVE SUCH A SHORT NOTICE!? I AM LEFT WITH THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE DUCKIES AND HOW AM I GOING TO FINISH IT IN LESS THAN 24 HOURS!?” He yelled with tears spilling all over his cheeks as he pulled out from the drawer what seems like a conjoined pair of strikingly familiar duckies soft toy but, without its head, only cotton stuffing spilling out.

Is this J really the same J as the one who pushed Junhyung to the core and bullied him as if he was nothing initially? How is this possible?

***
Junhyung: But… my mom said I was a lazy baby. No matter how she tried to get me to sit up, crawl or walk, I would just lie there.

 Junhyung: I think it’s very manly.

J: I KNOW YOU KNEW YOU COULD LEAVE A LONG TIME AGO, BUT WHY DID YOU NOT TELL US BEFOREHAND!? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO GIVE SUCH A SHORT NOTICE!? I AM LEFT WITH THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE DUCKIES AND HOW AM I GOING TO FINISH IT IN LESS THAN 24 HOURS!?

I missed out this gif in the previous chapter. Tsk~ How could I forget?

Junhyung's y