A Wrong Turn



My smiles couldn't have been wider.


My man and my friend, Shaun, had come and save the day!


WOOT WOOT! WOOT WOOT!


I was so tempted to do my victory "chicken" dance otherwise known as "tok tok tok", the same gesture I taught Dara to do during the YG family concert last year for her performance of "One Love" but I convinced that by doing so, I would just put the Great Kwon Leadah's name in shame.


Plus, I didn't want to look all comical in front of my rival, Nichkhun Horvejkul. Challenging him to an "Ang Ganda Ko" dance battle was more than enough embarrassment the Kwon clan could endure.


Speaking of Nichkhun, I was kind of noticing his sullen state lately. I looked over to his direction and saw him curiously looking at Shaun, as if deciphering every move of him, like he's some kind of cryptic code waiting to be broken.


Now it makes me wonder what he and Dara talked about yesterday. I tried coercing D to narrate in full details what they talked about but all I got was just a gist of the whole story...



"Where do you think you're going, Ssantokii?"


I crept up from behind Dara who was sneaking into the girls' dormitory.


"KWON JIYONG!"


She immediately placed her hands above , realizing she had yelled those words.


I chuckled at how cute she looked being in that predicament.


She glared at me furiously but froze on her spot when a loud voice boomed from inside her dormitory.


"SSANTOKI? IS THAT YOU???"


"CRAP! Bommie's home!'


She rushed towards the stairs but came back immediately as if remembering.


She stopped running when she reached me and looked at me curiously.


"Can I stay in your dorm for awhile? I promise I won't be a nuisance."


I was actually ecstatic that she brought that up but since I am the Great Kwon Leadah, I should NEVER show how excited I was at the prospect of spending this night with my little Ssantokki.


"Why don't you want to stay in your dorm?" I raised my eyebrow at her.


I noticed her flinch when I asked that question.


"It's because Bommie will kill me! She will definitely kill me!" She hissed under her breath, tugging all the while at my shirt.


I paused for awhile and savored watching the little Ssantokki's panic-stricken expression, letting myself have a little payback for her prudeness earlier.


"Let me think about it first... I mean, I'm supposed to write a song tonight and seeing you will be there might distract me from~"


"Ok fine I won't bother you anymore." She mumbled and grumpily walked towards their door.


When she was about to turn the knob, I pulled her towards me, lifted her off her feet and carried her bridal style.


"YA KWON JIYONG! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!!"


I chuckled as she struggled to get free from my hold.


"Carrying you. Isn't it obvious?"


I felt a fist connected with my shoulder. I winced a bit but smile nonetheless.


"YA! I KNOW THAT! BUT WHY THE HELL ARE YOU CARRYING ME?!?"


The fist was very persistent, still punching repeatedly my abused shoulder.


"To make sure that the little Ssantokki wouldn't escape."


I chuckled when I heard her whimper.


"YA! I THOUGHT YOU WERE BUSY?!"


I grunted a bit when I ascended the stairs. Dara, thought lightweight, was moving continuously, squirming and wriggling to be set free which made my steps wobbly.


"I changed my mind. Who knows, I might get some lyrical inspiration from what we're about to do tonight." I smirked evilly as I felt her shudder and paused for awhile, as if absorbing my words.


I chuckled when I felt her stop struggling and just stayed put, as if in a trance.


And then, the onslaught of punches, pinches and slaps came pouring in.



"YA! YOU ERT! YOU MANIAC YOU! PUT ME DOWN! PUT ME DOWN! YA! YA! YA!!!!"


So this is how it feels to be a human punching bag. *SNIFF SNIFF*


"YA! YA! STOP THAT!" I hissed as I struggled to keep my balance. "If you don't stop, we might fall and roll all the way down the stairs." I warned her which made her stop abruptly.


Seeing that it was the golden opportunity I was waiting for, I dashed my way towards my dorm and hastily opened the door.


Once inside the dorm, I raced towards my room and drop her on the bed, earning a shock look on the Ssantokki's face.


"J-j-jiyong???" She almost whispered those words, her eyes growing uncharacteristically wide.


I just smirked at her as I locked my room.


I saw her moved a little backwards towards the bed's headboard as I took of my shirt, threw it on the floor carelessly and slowly moved closer to the bed.


"J-jiyong? W-what do you *gulp* think you're doing?"


Ooh. I can sense fear in the voice of my little Ssantokki.


"Why is my Ssantokki shaking? She knows I wouldn't hurt her." I said in a low teasing voice, letting out an evil grin as well.


I moved closer, lifting my feet off the ground and joining her in my cozy bed. I saw gulp as I crawled my way towards her.


"Alright. Maybe it will hurt a little but I'll make sure that as soon as the pain comes, the pleasure will wash it all away with a flick of my finger."


I held my fingers in the air and flicked it. The little Ssantokki's eyes watched my fingers every movement.


"Ji..." She whimpered helplessly as I crawled closer towards her. She moved a little more backwards but stop when her back bumped against the wall.


"Oops. I think you've reach the dead end, babe. Looks like you have nowhere else to turn to." I hissed teasingly at her as I knelt in front of her.


"Ji... what are you doing...?" She asked in a low whisper, barely letting those words come out of .


"Punishing you, Ssantokki, for being so playful earlier while I'm carrying you..." I smirked at her making her shiver as I whispered those words.


Then, my expression changed when I continued.


"And for spending such a long time alone with that Nichkhun." I told her while diverting my glance from her.


I felt her soft hands cupped my face, pulling it towards her.


"Hey, babe. You don't have anything to be jealous about. My meeting with Khun Khun was harmless."


She smiled, that sweet, angelic smile of hers that sent me to heaven the first time we met.


"But, D, you were gone for two hours! Does it take that long to talk? And you're not even telling me what the hell you two talked about!" I pouted which I knew probably made me look like some brat who was not given a gift during Christmas.


"Ji, the reason we took a long time was because probably, that would be the last time we'd be able to have that moment." She told me.


Although my heart momentarily jumped when she said that, it was still vague to me.


I looked at her and urged her to continue.


"I told him about us and how you're the only man this heart can beat for."


Okay. I felt my heart stopped for awhile there.


"And he let me go, for he could feel that it is only in your arms that I can find my refuge."


*BLAG!*


"JI!"


Dara rushed towards where I was, plopped on the floor first, to be exact. I was so dazed with what she said earlier that I failed to notice that I was swaying towards the edge of my bed.


"Aigoo, it hurts pretty bad..." I said as I nursed my aching .


She started laughing as she watched me pouting and whimpering like a kid.


"You're too cute!" She pinched my reddened cheeks and hurriedly made her way towards my bed when I lunged at her.


"So the little Ssantokki really wants to be punished badly, neh? Tsk." I hissed at her while wearing an evil smirk.


"OMO! THE DRAGON IS ALIVE!" She exclaimed as her eyes darted towards the lower half of my body. I chuckled at her childishness.


"Oh, it is alive! And it is looking to be set free to capture its helpless victim." I hissed as I slithered on the bed like a snake, which is far from a dragon actually.


She giggled like a little kid. Trust the Ssantokki to turn ual banters into a child's play.


"Ooh ooh! I bet the Great Dragon's huffing and puffing in anger!" She squealed in delight.


Great. Don't tell me she'll name Kwon Jr. after that hideously gay dragon.


"Puff the Magic Dragon, set free from your cage!"


She did some twirling movements with an imaginary wand and pointed towards my "dragon".


As if taking a cue, I held on to my shorts, ready to pull it down to set the magic dragon free.


*BLAG!*


"SSANTOKKI! GET THE HELL OUT OF THE DRAGON'S ROOM NOW!"


CRAP! THE BOMINATOR'S INSIDE MY FRICKIN' DORM!!!


I saw the little Ssantokki's eyes grew wide, clutching my blanket over her head.


I looked down at the tent that formed inside my shorts and groaned painfully.


"Baby..." I whimpered helplessly at her. She only looked at me apologetically before pulling the blanket over her head again.


"JIYONG, SSANTOKKI, MAKE SURE YOU'RE BOTH FULLY CLOTHED. I'M COMING IN!"


SH*T!


I fell down on the floor and grabbed my shirt. I hoisted it up and wore it just in time as Bom-noona dashed towards the bed and pulled my little Ssantokki without a word.


Before I could even say a word, noona turned to me. She and my Ssantokki were already outside my dorm.


"Jiyong, next time, please make sure you're wearing your shirt right. Are you trying to make the reversed shirt the newest trend now?" She smirked as she dragged my little Ssantokki away from me.


I looked down at my shirt and felt my cheeks reddened as I unknowingly wore my shirt inside out.


"Ya, Jiyong! Are you listening to me?" I woke up from my little daydream and saw Shaun's hand being waved in front of my face.


"Haysssst, man! Why the need to wave your hand?" I feigned my embarrassment by acting irritated.


"Dude, you were spacing out earlier." He said with a chuckle.


"Was not." I said defensively. I stole a glance at Dara who was trying to stifle a laughter but was failing miserably. I looked over to Yoona and saw her giving me an amused look while smiling, same as Nichkhun.


"Arasso. Arasso. Sorry for that. Let's get down to business." I said getting my game face on.


Shaun faced us, showing us his professional stance.


"Teddy already has your song assignments so let's start with your blocking for the first song which is..."






















People say time flies when you're having fun.


Well, that is kind of true.


You see, ever since I was reunited with Jiyong, the past two weeks seemed to have flew like a rocket.


One moment it's there, then it's gone.


Christmas was no different.


It came by and said goodbye almost immediately.


Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed Christmas Day. In fact, I enjoyed it so much I wished it wouldn't end.


You see, Jiyong went with me to Busan and spent Christmas with my family. Of course, Durami and Cheondoongie were beyond ecstatic for they praise the ground Jiyong walked in.


But more than them, it was omma who was more than happy to have Jiyong as our visitor.


Omma had always treated Jiyong as her son, traveling back to the year 2005, when Jiyong, Youngbae and I were still trainees in YG. Jiyong and Youngbae (Jiyong most of the time) would visit our home and ask omma to cook their favorite Filipino food.


Sinigang na Hipon sa Sampaloc.


It had become a habit for Jiyong to visit our home and show affection for omma which omma had grown to love and that started the whole "Jiyong should be my son" dream of omma.


Yes, my whole family loves him like he's one of us.


My oppa-like dongsaeng.


My omma grew sad when Jiyong stopped visiting her after we broke up. She told me one night that she felt as if she lost a son and it broke my heart that while omma yearned for her faux-son, I was yearning for the man I thought I would be spending forever with.


But that was all in the past as we were together once again.


Happy once again.


And now that we were just a day away from greeting a new year, what better way to start than performing on-stage with my boyfriend, the one and only, Kwon Jiyong.


It was the night of KBS Gayo Daejun and like the stars that shone tonight in their dazzling fashion, my eyes sparkled in sheer joy and bliss.


I smiled dreamily as I saw him standing at stage right, directly across me.


For a moment, our eyes met.


My heart fluttered when I saw his lips curved into a boyish smile, the smile that took my breath away.


I watched as he made his way towards the stage just as the lights dimmed, unaware that my partner, Khun Khun, did the same.


Then a beautiful melody was being played on the piano. My eyes focused on center stage, to the man who was skillfully playing the instrumental intro of his hit song.


I closed my eyes and hummed along with the familiar tune, the song that was once dedicated to me by that special man in my life.


The spotlight was focused on him, the man who once confessed his pure and genuine feelings for me, as he sang with all his heart and soul.


Dong Youngbae...



'Baby!

Listen to your heart, won’t let you down..'



I opened my eyes and saw the spotlight turned towards the man who have taught my heart to open up again.


The man whom I hurt and let go of.


Khun Khun...


I heard the crowd screamed as I made my way towards him, probably feeling giddy seeing the two of us sharing the same stage. He gave me a smile as he watched me come closer to him.


It broke my heart knowing that behind his smile was a flash of sadness I knew he was struggling to hide from me.



'Cause you should be my Lady!

Now that we’re apart love will show how..

Life carries on…'



I leaned my head on his shoulder and felt him heaving deep breaths.


Mianhe, Khun Khun...



'I’ve never felt so strong

Life can lead us to a happiness never ending..'



Still with my head on Khun Khun's shoulder, I watched as Yoona walked towards Jiyong.


Thankful for the dimming of the lights, I let myself feel a twinge of jealousy as Yoona leaned her head on Jiyong's shoulder.



'If we just know that we belong to each other

Never worry, grow as we go..'



My heart leaped as Jiyong darted his eyes towards me.


And though no words were spoken, our hearts understood what the other wanted to say.


Trust.



'I can see you in your wedding dress...'



I nodded subtly, replying to his plea.



'Never let go…'



I smiled, finding peace in my heart.



'Never let go…' I mouthed to him.



Youngbae prolonged the ending of his song, letting us feel the wonderful melancholic beauty of his song.


And just before the song came to an end, Khun Khun held my hand and I willingly gave it to him.


My heart beat uncontrollably as we started walking towards his direction, towards the man my heart was screaming for.





















I held her hand as we walked towards the man I have come to know as my rival for her heart.


She was looking at him just as he was, as if the world only belonged to them. As if we were just mere specks in their own little world.


It hurts. It hurts so bad no matter how much I tried to smile it off and convince myself that I was happy for her happiness.


it! It hurts damn too much.


I bit my lips to stop my tears from dropping, from completely breaking down in front of thousands of fans.


We stopped when we were just a feet away from Jiyong, the man who have captured her heart once again and a part of me wanted to punch the lights out of him so that I wouldn't have any rival to her heart anymore.


But another part of me, a bigger part of me, wanted to reach out to him and thank him for making her smile the way she was smiling right now for I know I could never do that.


I could never make her happy the way Jiyong can.


I pulled our intertwined hands and offered hers to Jiyong, as if I was leaving her to Jiyong's care. Jiyong took her hand and the boy broke into a grin which could only be explained as pure happiness.


I heard the crowd collectively gasp, confused as to why I did what I did.


But their gasp turned into "awww" as Jiyong pulled her hand towards his lips and kissed it adoringly.


I turned my head away, afraid my broken heart would shatter into tinier pieces if I watched the scene any longer.


I felt a hand on my shoulder and saw Yoona standing beside me, smiling encouragingly at me.


" it up, Khun. It's our turn." She smiled that smile that I have come to know as my therapeutic.


As if on cue, Jiyong and Dara walked out of the stage and a beautiful music resonated towards the auditorium.


It was our song, the song that best described Yoona's and my journey.


It was all about us now. No more Dara or Jiyong.



'We thought of different ways

to relight the fire..

Worked a few times before

Little we knew

it was only half the battle..'



We started out knowing that we'd be faced with countless obstacles. We knew that we were on the losing end, living in a world clouded by shallowness and lies.


Yet, we decided to take the risk and let our hearts love and endure.




'It was way more to endure..

Agreed to never stop

and go the distance...'



We were too stubborn, two young and stubborn hearts.


We thought our love could conquer all.



'Love without more

this flowing feeling..

On an air balloon just

aiin't there between us..'



I looked at her and saw her watching me closely, oblivious to the dazed confusion of the crowd.



'The sand in our hourglass

has come through for us..

We just can't seem to repair this

get back in touch..

Like the sun in the sky

it burns deep when I look in your eyes

I can't face you and say goodbye

It's never easy...



Yoon-ah, I was a coward. Instead of facing you and saying proper goodbye, I took off and left you without a clue.


Mianhe, Yoon-ah.


Mianhe...



I looked deep into her eyes, silently telling her through my song the words I have wanted to tell her and make her understand.




'So I'll just send you a postcard..

By the time you receive it

I bet I'm on your 'hate you' list...

Send it in a postcard..

Hope you can read it

cause my teardrops ran and blurred the ink...

Send it on a postcard..

Give it a shot..

My mind is sure

but my heart is not...

This is so hard, to be so far..

P.S. miss your lipstick kiss

send it on a postcard...'





























I don't know if my eyes were fooling me or my heart was just too stubborn and was still wishing for even a thin thread of hope for Khun and I.


He was looking at me, his eyes telling me the unspoken words I have wanted to hear from him.


My heart ached to hold him once again, make him feel that my love for him is still here, still waiting for him.


But I knew he was hurting, he was hurting from giving up and letting go of Dara-unnie.



'We keep telling each other we'll get better

but I still feel the pain...

It's weighing on my brain like a thousand tons of

falling hail, it rained...

The miles we went to get is up a twisted..

Now would that get it again..

The wind's too strong to hold us any longer

When it's over, it's over...'



I knew that we were a hopeless case but my heart's just too stubborn, too persistent to let you go.



'The sand in our hourglass

has come through for us..

We just can't seem to repair this

get back in touch..

Like the sun in the sky

it burns deep when I look in your eyes

I can't face you and say goodbye

It's never easy...



Khun, it's unfair.


No matter how much you have hurt me, it's still you.


It has always been you.


Can't you see me the way you saw me before?


Can't I replace her in your heart?


Can't you love me the way you love me before?



'So I'll just send you a postcard..

By the time you receive it

I bet I'm on your 'hate you' list...

Send it in a postcard..

Hope you can read it

cause my teardrops ran and blurred the ink...

Send it on a postcard..

Give it a shot..

My mind is sure

but my heart is not...

This is so hard, to be so far..

P.S. miss your lipstick kiss

send it on a postcard...'



Our hands touched. And though it was only part of the choreography, I felt my heart skipped a beat.


Khun...


'I want you to know

when the plane took off

I was wishing that I had a parachute..

Cause there was one side of my head

Screaming feelings of regret and I saw the truth..

We can start over new..

You know what comes next when we do..

We make the same U-turn that led us all stranded here...'



I felt his hand cupped my face and I blinked.


That was no longer part of the choreography.


I stared deep into his eyes and saw something that made me stop.


Regret.


Are you regretting hurting me Khun?


Or do you regret loving me?


Because I, I never regretted loving you.


No matter how many times, no matter how much you have hurt me.



'So I'll just send you a postcard..

By the time you receive it

I bet I'm on your 'hate you' list...

Send it in a postcard..

Hope you can read it

cause my teardrops ran and blurred the ink...

Send it on a postcard..

Give it a shot..

My mind is sure

but my heart is not...

This is so hard, to be so far..

P.S. miss your lipstick kiss

send it on a postcard...'



He held on tighter on my hand as if it was his lifeline.


I have felt this before, so vaguely familiar.



'Oh, no, no, no, I'll..

Send it on a postcard...

Yes, I know I was kinda wrong..

Send it on a postcard..

Send it on a postcard..

Cause I couldn't look at you..

And tell you it's over, no, no...'



I don't know if he was carried away with the song or he was extremely emotional but he suddenly pulled me into a hug.


Surprised as I was, I couldn't help but lose myself in his embrace.


It's been too long, Khun. Welcome home...


We held each other, never letting go, unaware that as the lights dimmed, the audiences screamed their hearts out, celebrating with us as we were reunited in each other's arms, this time I hope, for good.


























I felt a tear wanting to escape my eyes as I watched two of my friends finding their way towards each other.


Be happy, Yoon-ah and Khun. You both deserve to be happy.


I wiped the tear that managed to escape my eye and took a deep breath.


"Ready?"


I turned to left and saw Jiyong smiling widely at me.


"Never been this ready my whole life." I answered him with a confident smile.


We stepped into the stage just as Khun and Yoon-ah exited.


The music changed, introducing our song.



Jiyong pulled me gently towards the center stage where we were met by surprised gasp and murmurs from the audience.



'Oh oh oh, Sandara'


I smiled at him as I did the same.


'Eh eh GD ah'


He smiled, almost chuckled as I incorporated his name in the lyrics.


'Oh oh..'

'Eh eh..'


He let go of my hand and stared deep into my eyes, those piercing eyes that seemed to travel the depths of my soul.



'I wanna tell the world that your my girl

and i'm your man, aw baby...'



I kept his gaze, confessing with my whole heart what I have always wanted from the start.



'And I wanna tell the world that you got me

Why can't we be, Aw baby?'



He moved closer and touched my lips ever so gently, sending shivers down my spine.



'I can't put my name on your kiss...'



He stared at my lips with eyes filled with longing that I couldn't help but bit it, pretending it was his lips doing it with mine.



'And I can't speak your name from these lips...'

'We froze and nobody knows..'



I walked away and turned my back from him as I sang to the audience.



'Have to walk out the room everytime you call...'



I heard his footsteps going towards the opposite direction.



'Tellin everybody I ain't seen you in so long...'



I faced him, a pained expression was written on my face.



'It feels like i ain't breathing..'



He faced me too and in his eyes, I could see the same pain I was feeling.



'This feels worser than cheating...'



And it's true. It pained me so much that I had to keep what I was feeling for him to myself because of our complicated situation.


And I know damn well that it's eating him inside, the many instances we both had to lie to protect each other.


It hurt that as much as I wanted to proclaim to the world that I love and adore Kwon Jiyong, I had to put a nonchalant face and deny whatever bond that two of us have made.



'Coz we out here livin' a lie,

Out here livin' a lie,

I'm out here livin' a lie,

Why what makes you smile seem to make you cry

I'm out here livin' a lie,

I'm out here livin' a lie,

We out here livin' a lie,

Behind these smiles I'm really hurting

Inside-side-side,Inside-side-side, oh no

Inside-side-side,Inside-side-side...'



Yes, I'm his Ms. Liar.


And him, his my own stupid liar.



'Everytime i wanna put us on display

time takes a breathe, Aw Baby...'



I approached him and reached out my hand to his but stopped when I was a few feet away from him.



I hear about other relationships that ain't true

I wanna set it right, Aw Baby..



He took a few steps towards me and grabbed my hand, shaking his head as if to say he won't let go.



'And i can't tell nobody how i feel, oh..'

'And i can't tell nobody how we is, oh...'



We were both on the same boat, Jiyong and I.


We were both players in this sick, sadistic game called life.



'I wanna hop on the first thing smokin

tell our agent to book us a plane...'



'I wanna be near you...'



He pulled me towards him as he sang those words, making my breath get caught on my throat.



'I wanna be near you too...'



I answered honestly for it was what my heart was begging me to sing.



'I wanna wake up (wake up)

right next to you baby...'



I felt my cheeks blushed as I remembered the countless passionate nights we've spent together.



'Coz we out here livin' a lie,

Out here livin' a lie,

I'm out here livin' a lie,

Why what makes you smile seem to make you cry

I'm out here livin' a lie,

I'm out here livin' a lie,

We out here livin' a lie,

Behind these smiles I'm really hurting

Inside-side-side,Inside-side-side, oh no

Inside-side-side,Inside-side-side...'



He raised our intertwined hands towards my face and gently caressed it, earning shrieks and cheers from fans.



'Sandara, baby...'

'Ji, baby...'

'What on this earth will we do?'



My eyes were filled with questions, unaware of how we'll face the harsh reality that would soon creep up on us.



But his loving eyes and gentle smile suddenly erased all the fears and doubts that I had.



'What the worst that could happen baby if they know?

Won't be nothing,

Coz your impeccable, your everything that i love...'



Suddenly, his lips moved forward, making me hold my breath as I anticipated where it would land.


I closed my eyes, determined to savor the moment we will be sharing.


And gently, almost as if treating me with so much fragility, I felt his lips brushed on my forehead.


"Baby, I will take care of you. You don't need to be scared."


He lips traveled down and met with my nose.


"Oppa will always take care of you."


I closed my eyes shut and blocked off all sounds except for his as the lights slowly dimmed, leaving us with nothing but darkness and the genuine promises of both of our hearts.


























I watched as she slept peacefully beside me. I don't know how long I had been silently watching her, smiling every once in awhile as she twitched her nose or rubbed her face like a cat.


She was my own little addiction. An aphrodisiac I couldn't turn resist. An obsession I couldn't turn away from.


She was my own little heaven. My own little sanctuary. In her smile I could find my refuge.


In her trust, I feel invincible.


For her, I would give everything. For her, I would endure anything.


Sandara...


I gently caressed her face, smiling as I felt her soft baby skin against my callused fingers.


I wanted to be with her tonight, lay beside her and make love to her, make her feel all the passion and love I have for her.


I wanted to feel one with her again, feel our bodies uniting, attaching our soul to each other.


But I knew she was exhausted.


I exited my car and went to her side. I carried her bridal style and walked towards her dorm.


As I walked her home, I couldn't help but steal a kiss from her soft pink lips.


Her lips. I could kiss them all day and won't get contented.


I knocked softly when we reached her dorm. Minji opened the door and smiled as she greeted me.


I made my way towards her room and gently laid her down on her own bed. I stole one more kiss before I went out.


"Oppa, you won't be staying here with unnie?" Minji asked me.


"Will you allow your oppa to stay here with your unnie?" I asked her, a smile grew on my face.


She smiled mischievously at me. "I know how much you missed unnie and unnie missed you too. It'll be our little secret." She winked at me.


I chuckled and ruffled her hair.


She bade me good night and headed off to her own room.


I silently entered Dara's room and smiled when I saw her sleeping peacefully.


I laid beside her as gentle as I could, afraid that I might awaken her.


"Sleep tight, jagiya. Oppa is just right here beside you."


I brushed a strand of hair away from her face.


As I closed my eyes, I heard a soft whisper, so soft that one could barely hear it.


But I heard it loud and clear.


"Stay with me, oppa."


I smiled as my heart fluttered at her sweet, angelic voice.


"Oppa will stay with you always, jagiya. I will never leave your side."


I kissed her forehead gently before succumbing to sleep.


Tonight, I would sleep peacefully.






























There was no way I could sleep peacefully tonight.


I struggled to put Khun in the front passenger seat as his weight slumped on my shoulder.


It was 1 A.M. and I just rushed to Woobar when I received a call from my friend that Khun was knocked out from being too much.


"Why must you be a pabo?! Drinking what you couldn't handle!"


I knew it was useless to scold him for he was pretty much unconscious.


When I finally succeeded placing him in the front passenger seat, I sped off and headed towards their dorm.


The drive towards their dorm was silent as I just drove and occasionally stole glances at my passenger.


"Khun, don't do this to yourself..."


I whispered softly, though I knew that even if I yelled those words, he still wouldn't comprehend them.


"Please don't make me hate unnie. Don't be like this."


Funny how I was begging a man who's barely conscious.


Tsk. Yoon-ah. What have you gone too?


I was filled with so much thoughts that I didn't realized that we were already outside his building.


Thank god for the security guard's help, I was able to bring Khun up to his room.


Woo was the one who opened the door and shock on his face upon seeing me carrying Khun was, I must say, epic.


I took him to his room and nursed him.


I prepared a basin filled with ice water and alcohol. I borrowed a small towel from Woo and used that to wash Khun's alcohol-reeking body.


I took off his clothes and started washing him. All the while, Woo was watching me by the door.


"Wooyoung-sshi, please help me with this. I need some more ice water." I asked him. Woo took it and came back in no time.


"Why are you doing this?" He asked as he gave me the basin.


I knew exactly what he meant.


"I love him, Woo. I still do and probably always will."


I told him sadly.


He paused for awhile then nodded.


"Do you need anything else? Need any help?" He asked. I smiled at him in gratitude.


"Ani." I answered simply.


With that, he left me alone with the man I was holding dear in my heart. The same man who was crying for another woman.


I felt him stirred and called out for her.


"Dara..."


With just one name, I felt a million daggers stabbed my heart repeatedly.


I was the one nursing him, taking care of him.


Yet, it was still Dara-unnie his heart was calling for.


"Dara..."


I was about to walk away when his words stopped me.


"I want Ginseng Chicken. Just like Yoon-ie used to cook for me..."


I felt my heart found a new string of hope, a string I was sure I would hold on to.


So I did. I cooked the Ginseng Chicken I used to cook for him whenever he had a hangover or he was sick.


I helped him eat it, though his eyes were still heavy-lidded and dazed.


He probably couldn't even recognize my face and wouldn't even remember that I was the one who take care of him.


But I didn't care. All I knew was he wanted the Ginseng Chicken that I cooked for him.


That was all that matters.


No matter how many times he called me Dara.


No matter how many times he thought I was Dara.


He still remembered Yoon-ie who used to cooked Ginseng Chicken for him.


I patiently cared for him and ensured that he would be sleeping peacefully.


And when everything was in order, I allowed myself to lay beside him.


Khun, give me this much.


Even if just for tonight, let me lay beside you like this as if you were mine.


I laid my head on his chest and held him as if he was my pillow.


"Good night, Khun..."


I felt him heaved a deep breath before mumbling his words.


"Good night, Dara..."


That night, I let my tears fall freely on his chest.






































I woke up and watched him still sleeping peacefully.


The feeling I had then was bittersweet.


I was with him the whole night, even laying beside him and holding him as if he was mine all along.


But his heart, his heart called for her.


With trembling hands, I did what i thought I should do.


"Unnie, can you please come here quick? Khun needs you..."





























I spent the night with Jiyong and slept peacefully.


There were no words to describe the feeling I felt.


Bliss. Absolute bliss.


Somehow, though, I ended up in Khun Khun's room early this morning and the feeling was different.


Guilt. Absolute guilt.


Khun Khun drank himself to unconsciousness because he was hurting so much.


And the cause of his pain was me.


I moved towards the bed and sat on the edge, caressing Khun Khun's forehead gently.


Sorry, Khun Khun...


A tear fell from my eye just as he stirred on his bed.


"Dara?" He asked the moment his eyes opened.


"How are you feeling?" I managed to ask despite my welling tears.


"My head aches a little but I think I'll be okay." He gave a small smile, still acting brave in front of me.


Awkward silence followed, both of us uncertain what to say to each other.


I couldn't stand it anymore.


"Khun Khun, mian..."


I bowed my head continuously.


He cupped my face and smiled delicately.


"Kamsahamnida."


I jerked my head in surprise at his words.


"Thank you for staying with me now."


I just nodded and remained silent for silence was our only friend now.






























"Sorry, Ji. I didn't know who else to call. Besides, she's your girlfriend."


I hissed as I carried Yoona towards my car. I have found her engaged in a lip-lock with a guy she barely knew at a beat-up bar.


She was pretty knocked up and I could tell that she wasn't capable of going home by herself.


"Don't take me home. Hic!"


I shook my head as I continued driving.


"The girls will kill me and say 'YOONA! DRUNK AGAIN?! YOONA! USELESS DRUNK!' Pssssst!!!!"


She was surely knocked up.


I looked at her state and noticed that her blouse was pretty much drenched and reeking of alcohol. Good thing she was wearing a separate skirt.


She must change first before I brought her home for I didn't want her getting into trouble with SM.


I drove towards my dorm and decided to let her change there. I'll probably ask the landlady to help her change.


I helped her into my dorm room, thankful that Seungri wasn't there because for sure, he would bug me continuously.


As soon as I laid her in the couch, I went to the landlady's room only to find out that she went home to her province.


SH*T!


Left with no choice, I went back and tried to wake up Yoona.


"Yoona. Yoona." I gently tapped her cheeks. She mumbled incoherently and opened her eyes.


"Jiyang-sshee! Yarrr herrrre!" She said, her language slurred.


"Yoona, you must change your clothes. You're reeking of alcohol." I told her as I gave my shirt that was already too small for me.


"Ob cors I reek of alcohol. I'M DRUNKKKKKK!!!!!" She was even proud of saying she was drunk.


I helped her get up and pushed her gently towards my bathroom.


Minutes later, I heard the door to my room opened. My back was turned towards the door for I was taking off my shirt to change into new one.


My eyes widened when I felt two arms wrapped on my waist, holding me tightly from the back.


"Jiyong, make love to me..."


I turned around and gasp in shock as I realized Yoona was half-, staring with pitiful eyes at me.


"Y-yoona... w-what the hell are you doing??"


I tried to get out of her grasp but she just held on tighter, pressing her body against mine.


"Don't you find me beautiful, Ji? Am I not beautiful to you?"


Her voice sounded desperate that it was almost heartbreaking.


"Yoona, you know how much I love Dara, right? I can't cheat on her. I can't do that to her."


I said almost pleading.


"DARA! DARA! ALWAYS ABOUT DARA!"


I was stunned at her aggression towards Dara.


"I know Dara-unnie's a nice girl but what about me? Why can't you love me like you love her? Why can't Nichkhun forget her?"


I was about to push her off me when she suddenly pressed her lips against me.


"Mmmmph..."


*CRASH!*


We both jerked as a loud crashing sound came from the door.


I turned around and looked towards the door. My heart dropped to the floor as I saw the woman I love standing by the opened door, with eyes full of hatred, hurt and betrayal.


"Dara, I..."


But she just glared at me as her tears began to spill and ran away.


I pushed Yoona off me and was about to run towards Dara when Yoona held my leg.


"Ji, I'm sorry..."


I looked down at her and narrowed my eyes.


"Yoona please let me go. I need to follow Dara."


She let me go and I immediately broke into a sprint, determined to chase after Dara and explain everything.


I ran into the hallway but found no signs of her.


I pressed the elevator, pretty sure that she hadn't gone too far.


Seeing that the elevator was not coming up soon, i descended the stairs with speed I never knew I had in me.


I exited the building in a haste in hopes of seeing her there.


But she wasn't.


There was no longer any sign of her anywhere.


And right then and there, my knees gave up as I fell limply on the ground, my heart sinking deeper and deeper into the hollowness that formed inside of me.




























I ran and I ran.


Ji and Yoona.


The two of them.


I trusted them.


I didn't stop running until I was in the open street.


Everywhere, I could see cars flashing me with blinding lights.


Everywhere, cars were honking nonstop.


I started to move, my vision being blurred by my tears that rolled down uncontrollably and the blinding lights.


I moved forwards uncertainly, unaware of where I was heading.


"MOVE, MISS!"


I hear a loud honk.


"ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF?!?"


Several more honking of cars and screeches clouded my hearing.


I was at a loss.


My world was spinning uncontrollably.


I took a step to my right uncertainly.


Suddenly, I heard a loud screech sounding awfully near me.


And the last thing that my eyes saw was the van that was speeding in front of me.


My body froze and I remained on my spot as I closed my eyes and prepared myself for my impending doom.


And like every other story ever told, I saw a blinding light that somehow calmed me.


Peace, finally.


I closed my eyes as I felt my body being toppled down and bounced off the street.