Around You Always




I felt myself smiling as well as I continued watching you enjoy the beautiful sky above us. I never thought I'd get to see such innocence in your face once again.


You must have felt my stare though as you turned to me with an amused look on your face.


“Am I that good-looking that you cannot take your eyes off me, huh, D-ah?” You asked me with that mischievous glint on your eyes. I couldn’t help but to laugh at your playfulness.


“Ani. I was just marveling at how big your head has gotten. Has it been inflated with too much air?” I teased you which made you pout cutely. 


Yes, you’re way too cute, Kwon Jiyong.


We grew silent once again as we stared into each other’s eyes. I have lost track of how long we have stayed in the rooftop. 


Twenty minutes? Thirty? Probably an hour?


But I didn’t care for as we were standing side by side, I felt the noises that surrounded us gradually fade into oblivion.


I smiled at you. You smiled back at me. We did not speak of anything and yet we understood the peace that we both felt at the moment.


"Dara!" 


I heard my name being called repeatedly. I looked at you and saw you nod and smile at me sadly. 


Mianhe, Ji. I know you’re hurting because of me...


I felt my tears starting to well up in my eyes. I bit my lower lips to prevent them from escaping.


Mian, Ji. I just couldn’t disregard Khun Khun just like that. He has done so much for me, waited patiently for me, until my heart was fully ready to welcome him.



And I’m hurting him now. Just as he successfully broke the brick wall I had built for myself, here comes my heart yearning for something more…


“I’m so selfish, right, Jiyong?” I asked you meekly when I already knew the answer.


You looked at me with confusion and I sighed in relief knowing that you didn’t see me that way.


“I opened my heart to Khun Khun and let him into my life but here I am…” I smiled at you, a bit ashame of my actions. 


“…standing beside the man that still holds a part of my heart.”


You looked at me and I saw the seriousness in your eyes. You gently caressed the side of my face with your callused finger, as if it was the most fragile thing in the world.


“If you’re selfish, then what does that make me?” I heard you chuckle as you continued tracing the side of my face. “I hurt you more than once when all you did was love me. I left you twice when all you did was stay by my side. I told you lies for so many times when all you did was give your full trust…”


You gently rubbed the skin below my bottom lip and bit yours.


“… and yet here I am, standing here and asking you to let me love you again.” You chuckled once again as if finding the irony of our situation amusing.


“Ji…”


I started saying but a voice disrupted me.


“DARA!”


It was him again, calling for me again from a distance. I was being unfair and selfish once more as I ignored his calls.


I’m being unfair to Khun Khun. He doesn’t deserve to be treated this way…


I turned to you and saw the sadness in your eyes once again.


Yes, Ji, our borrowed moment is coming to an end and not a thing any of us can do. 


That was the sad reality. We were both idols, bound to the spotlight and attention people were giving us. Though we tried to live normal lives, our efforts just seemed futile. 


Somehow, someway, our alternate identities would creep up on us and claim the life we used to live. 


Yes, I miss her, the old Sandara Park, the simple girl who trained, laughed and loved. I miss her, the girl who could walk freely in the streets and hold hands with the boy she loved and cared about. 


I miss her just as much as I miss the old Kwon Jiyong, the playful boy who always managed to make me fume with anger with his unforgiving teasing, make me laugh with his ridiculous antics and cry with his childish jealousies and fits. 


I saw you looking at me with curious eyes and after awhile, chuckled as if you just discovered something. 


I felt my cheeks grew warm and I could almost feel a rich shade of red spreading all over the apples of my cheeks. 


"YA!" I slapped you in your arm that made you laugh uncontrollably.


You knew I was spacing out again, neh? 


I chuckled as you touched your hair and tentatively ruffled it. It had become a habit of yours. A cute, addicting habit. 


I looked around us, looked at the sky that was two shades bluer, looked at the Han River and its peaceful water streaming more smoothly and looked at your face which looked a lot like it was six years ago. 


I'll miss this, Jiyong... 


"Dara!" 


I cocked my head towards the slightly opened door that led to the voice coming from inside our building. 


It was him. 


I knew he was frantically looking for me, probably concerned with what's happening to me at the moment. 


I looked at you and saw you watching me, observing me silently. I couldn't help but notice the sadness that was visible in your eyes. 


"I think I should go now." I told you even if I didn't want to. 


You smiled and nodded in understanding. "Neh. He's looking for you." You pouted your lips towards the door that was slightly ajar. 


I'll miss you... so much...


I turned my back and headed for the door, the door that would separate us once and for all.


I raised my hand to reach for the knob when I suddenly felt your strong arms encircled in my waist, holding me so tight.


“Is it too tight, D? Am I hurting you?” 


I could feel the longing in your voice as you wrapped your arms tighter than before.


You held me so tight that it was hard for me to breathe but I just let you.


“Ani. It’s just the way I want it, Ji.” 


I whispered as I close my eyes and savored the moment that we were having.


“You’re so fragile to me, D. I feel so scared sometimes to hold you like this, afraid that I would break you.” You buried you head on my shoulder.


“And yet you still hold me this tight. You still do not let me go even if you think you would break me.” I chuckled lightly at the contradiction.


I felt you chuckle as well. “Mian, D. It’s just that when I hold you, I always feel secured. I always feel stronger, much more courageous. Whenever you’re in my arms, I always feel invincible, as if I can do anything.” You told me softly which tugged at my heart.


“You’re Kwon Jiyong, you can do anything.” I told you with a smile even though it seemed futile as you won’t be able to see it.


You heaved a deep sigh and I felt once again the loneliness you were trying so hard to conceal.


“If I can do anything, then why can’t I make your pain go away, D? Why can’t I make us happy again?”


You gently pulled your hands away from my waist and turned me to face you. I saw a tear escape your eye.


We’re going to be ok, Ji. Don’t Cry. Please don’t cry…


“One day you will, Ji. I have faith in you." I answered you sincerely. 


"l know one day you’ll make things right again.” My hand reached for your cheek and wiped the tear that rolled down.


I do have faith in you, Ji. More than you can imagine…


“Thank you, D. You have always believed in me. When everyone else was throwing accusations at me for what I did in my concert, you stood bravely beside me, smiled and made a fool of yourself just to make me smile and laugh even though I knew you were breaking down as well seeing me all hurt and broken. When I shut down everyone else, you bravely barged into my room and demanded that I let you take care of me. You stayed with me even when I became overbearing. You swallowed all the hurtful things I yelled and instead of getting angry at me, you even encouraged me to let out all the hurt and pain I was feeling…” 


Your tears flowed freely now, staining your beautiful face.


“You have always been my strength, D. When my knees buckled and seized to function, you held my arm and walked beside me, lending your other foot so that I could reach my destination.” You held out your hand and cupped my chin.


“You have been the same, Ji. You protected me when everyone else wanted to harm me. You stayed up late at night just to keep me company when I was too stubborn to stop my late night practices. You wrote songs for me just to prove to people that I’m not a “bad” girl.” I saw a smile crept up in your lovely face.


I smiled as well and started singing a familiar tune to both of us, dancing the steps I have memorized with all my heart.


It was the song that we sang together, a meaningful song for us for it was the song that made our wish come true. It was the song that gave us the opportunity to share a stage with one another, just the two of us. Not 2NE1 nor BIGBANG. 


In that stage, we let the people see the real us. 


Not Dara Park of 2NE1 nor G-Dragon of BIGBANG. 


Just the dorky Sandara Park and the equally dorky Kwon Jiyong.


'Jamkkan sillyehamnida ~ (Excuse me)...' 


Your face lit up as soon as you recognized the song I was singing. 


'Nappeun sarameun anya ~ (I'm not a bad person)...' 


I winked at you after singing that line. Your smile got wider and joined me in my dorkiness. 


'Pyohyeoni seotulppunin geol ~ (The expression was probably just unpracticed)...' 


We both giggled like little kids as you also danced with so much swagger while I continued with my dorkiness. It was like we were having our own private performance. 


“I missed that.” You told me with that smile still pasted on your face. “I wonder when we’ll be able to perform that again.” You sighed and the loneliness was back in your eyes.


“Maybe we should ask sajangnim!” I smiled and wriggled my eyebrows in mischief. You just looked at me as if I was crazy.


“Yeah. How I wish it was as simple as that.” You smirked, probably thinking how absurd my idea was.


“Neh. It would be nice if things were simpler, right? It would be good if there were no complications.” You looked at me and nodded in agreement. 


“But then we wouldn’t be able to fully appreciate the happiness we will be receiving. Don’t you think?” I looked at you and saw confusion in your eyes. 


“Because we did not work hard to achieve it. We did not shed tears just to have it within our reach. We didn’t feel pain from all the obstacles we had to overcome just to be happy once again.” I told you with all seriousness and saw you finally understanding what I wanted to say.


“Ji, we have to bear this pain we are feeling right now. In order for us to fully realize and appreciate happiness, we must live with this for awhile…” I told you with a gentle smile. 


You looked deep into my eyes with that piercing stare of yours as if stripping me off of my human body, leaving only my soul for you to explore. You pulled me close to you and I was once again trapped in your warmth, your warmth that had always made me feel secured.


“D, I will bear this pain and a thousand more if it means in the end, I can still have you…” You whispered to my ears, letting your hot breath linger on my neck and making me shiver with much anticipation.


I felt your breath brushed the sensitive part of my ear. With a husky voice, you sang to me the sweet words that brought a wave of new sensation to me.


'Geudae cheoeumbon sungan I'am falling in love with you girl ~ (When I first saw you, I'm falling in love with you girl)...' 


My breath got caught on my throat as my chest heaved unceremoniously. 


I dared not to move, too afraid that if I did, our magical moment might fade away. I felt your lips gently touched my nape, brushing sidewards and touching the sensitive part of my neck.


“Ji…” I whispered hoarsely. You just moaned in reply.


You continued trailing butterfly kisses, this time to my chin traveling upwards towards my cheeks that had turned into crimson red from the attention it was given. I gently touched your back, caressed it like you always wanted me to and gripped hard on your shirt when you finally captured my lips.


I closed my eyes and felt your breath brushing my lips like a tender wind that caressed my battered body. 


I savored the moment that your lips explored mine and basked in the wonderful pleasure it gave me upon realizing it was our first kiss after eleven grueling months of pain and heartache. 


It was slow at first, gentle and tender, as if you treated my lips as fragile as I was to you. My hands went up to your hair as I struggled to deepen our kiss, our kiss that felt so familiar and yet, was coated with something new and exciting.


Longing.


Deeper passion. 


Desperation.


Through the intensity of it all, I felt your lips kissed all my anxieties, uncertainties, sadness and pain away. 


In your kiss, I felt you right all the wrong in my world. 


In your kiss, I felt that we were the only ones that mattered in this world. 


I felt our kiss deepened even more, making it extremely hard for us to breathe. I ruffled your hair as you encircled your arms around me, tighter than earlier. Both of us struggled with each other as our lips did a battle of their own.


I lost count of how long we’ve been lost in our little moment. All I knew was when we finally decided to pull away from each other, we were both panting heavily as if we just took on the most important race in our lives.


And it’s true. We did battle our race against time for we knew that we didn’t have the much. Seconds from now, we would be whisked away from one another and live completely different lives, go completely different directions.


“DARA!”


I quickly pulled away from you, ending the passionate union that we just had.


He called for me again and guilt started creeping up on me. I bit my lips and looked at you uncertainly.


Our faces were just a heartbeat away. Both of us could feel our breaths meeting in the middle and fading together from sight. 


You leaned your head towards mine, our foreheads touched as you stared deep into my eyes, making my knees feel weak and wobbly. 


“Go now.” You told me sternly. I was confused at how easily you changed emotions.


Why, Ji? Did our kiss mean nothing to you?


“Go now, when I still can let you go.” You whispered hoarsely as you closed your eyes, as if it was too painful to look at me. 


“And please don’t look back because if you do, then you will be trapped with me here forever.” You told me as you opened your eyes and I knew you meant every word you just said.


"I'll let you go for now, my butterfly." You whispered huskily as I struggled to keep my eyes glued to your piercing stare. 


"But I will make sure that you will find your way back to me.”


Your hand gently caressed the back of my head, easing the tension I was feeling.


“I'll do my best to give you a damn good reason to come back home to me, D." 


I just stared at your magnetizing eyes, absorbing every word you have uttered to me. 


"Ji..." 


You pulled your head away from me and gave me room to move.


I saw you smiled and nodded. "I understand." You told me. "You go ahead. I'll stay here for awhile." You motioned for me to go back. 


I nodded and bowed to you, not knowing exactly why. 


"Annyeong, Jiyongie." I bade you goodbye. 


"Annyeong, D-ah." You answered with a smile. 


I turned my back and walked out of our sanctuary, unaware that the moment I did, tears flowed from your eyes uncontrollably as you cried the silent tears you shed for me. 

I saw him walking frantically, scanning every room he passed by. His face was full of worry and panic. 


"Khun Khun." I called him. I saw him jerk his head towards my direction and smiled upon seeing me. 


"Dara!" He ran towards me and pulled me into a hug, a gesture he rarely does. 


"Khun Khun..." I managed to let out a meek answer, shocked at the urgency of his action. 


"Please don't do that again, Dara." He buried his head on my shoulder. 


"Don't run away from me like that again." I could hear the pain in his voice and I felt a tug in my heart. 


"Mianhe." I apologized sincerely. 


I really did not want you to worry about me, Khun Khun. Mianhe... 


I felt him heaved a deep sigh. "Ani, no need to apologize." He told me as he still held on to me as if I was his lifeline. 


"Mian, Khun Khun. Jiyong and I tal~" 


"No need to tell me about it, Dara." He said softly. 


I nodded and felt relieved that he didn't probe anymore. I didn't know as well what to tell him exactly. 


After awhile, he pulled away from me and held my hand. 


"Let's go. All of them are worried about you." He told me as he squeezed my hand. I nodded and followed his lead.


We walked together, hand in hand. Some people took second glances at us as we passed them. Some murmured while others spoke so directly. 


"They look good together, neh?" 


I glanced up and saw two of our dancers giggling giddily. 


"But what about Jiyong-sshi?"


"What do you mean what about Jiyong-sshi? Don't you know that they've broken up already? He’s dating Yoona-sshi now. Where have you been? God, you're so outdated!" 


Sheeessh.. Don't they know the word "discreet"? 


“Are you blind? Can’t you see that he doesn’t look at Yoona-sshi the way he looks at Dara-unnie?”


I felt Khun Khun’s hand gripped mine tighter.


“Well, that doesn’t matter now. Haven’t you heard? Nichkhun of 2PM took the five steps test and passed it. He can now freely date Dara-unnie!”


I felt him pull away from me and approached the two dancers. “Excuse me, miss.” He tapped the shoulder of one of the dancers, the louder one.


“Nickhun-goon!” I bet she was genuinely surprised that an idol would tap her in her shoulder.


“Please be more discreet. We can hear you.” He smiled that sweet, boyish, charming smile of his and I couldn’t help but chuckle.


The dancers bowed their heads towards us and immediately walked away, leaving us alone on the hallway.


He turned to me and smiled which calmed my nerves. “Don’t mind them, Dara-yah. You will get more of those so you must get used to it.” He told me softly.


“I think I am used to it by now.” I answered frankly which caused us to laugh.


He smiled widely and took my hand again as he dragged me towards the lounge where 2NE1 were all waiting for us.


“UNNIE!” Minji and CL-roo both cried out as I entered the room. They both rushed towards me.


“SSANTOKKI!!” Bommie’s voice automatically outshouts them. She grabbed my shoulders and shook me violently. “Where have you been??!”


I could feel the worries written on my friends' faces but all I could do was smile at them apologetically.


“Mianhe. I wanted to get some fresh air.” I answered simply although I was suddenly being engulfed with guilt, especially when I looked at Khun Khun's understanding eyes.


I saw Bommie’s eyes grew suspicious. “Where is that brat, Jiyong? Aigoo... HE’LL REALLY GET IT FROM ME THIS TIME!!!”


The Bominator was on and I could almost see Bommie’s nostrils waving a red flag..


“Bommie-yah…” I started softly. “He’s trying to clear his head. Let’s leave him for awhile.” I told her with a smile.


She looked at me as if suspicious of my actions. I just cocked my eyebrow at her, assuring her that everything’s okay.


“Noona, what is your schedule today?” I heard Khun Khun’s voice as he asked Bommie.


“Today? Let’s see.” Bommie looked up at the ceiling as if in deep thought. “Well, we will be practicing for our year-end special performances and a meeting later with sajangnim to discuss the status of our performance in KBS Gayo Daejun.” She finished.


“I thought YG and KBS settled matters already? Didn’t Seungri-sshi and Dara-yah participate in 100 Points Over 100 as a sign of peace between the two companies?” Khun Khun looked at me, confused.


Before I was able to answer, CL-roo stepped in. “It’s different with Music Bank, though. YG-sajangnim and KBS executives are okay but sajangnim and the PD of Music Bank, that’s another matter.” She offered. Khun Khun was listening to her intently.


“Remember the incident when our BIGBANG oppas performed “Tonight” and they were given a poor stage and even unfair scores? Sajangnim is not one to forget when one of his artists gets mistreated.” CL-roo explained. Minji, Bommie and I all nodded in agreement.


“Wow. That is why you guys are called YG family.” Khun Khun whistled. “Hey, maybe you guys can adopt me and make me part of your family. What do you think, huh, Lil Minji?” He winked at Minji who giggled and pretended to slap her oppa. You see, during our stay in Tokyo, Minji and Khun Khun grew a bond after watching countless Japanese TV series.


“You can be a part of our family, Khunnie.” Bommie smiled at him mischievously. She leaned closer to him. “Just take good care of our Ssantokki here.” It was her turn to wink at him.


That made me blush, spreading a bright red shade all over my cheeks.


“Neh. You better take care of our little Ssantokki or else all your muscles will deflate in a second.” Kush-oppa, who just entered the lounge, gripped his knuckles and made them sound while attempting to scare Khun Khun.


I looked at Khun Khun and saw the amused look on his face. “NEH, NEH, HYUNG!” He answered enthusiastically.


Teddy-oppa smirked and fixed his cap. “You can always drop by here and visit Dara-yah, just don’t and I mean DON’T, touch any of my things here in the studio, arasso?” He gave Khun Khun a warning look that made the latter gulp.


Kush-oppa snickered. “He loves his studio so much, Khunnie Boy. He treats his mixers and amplifiers as his babies. He even sings to them at night before he goes to sleep.” We all laughed at Kush-oppa dissing Teddy-oppa.


We talked some more, from the most trivial to the most unusual subjects. We were still in the middle of our chit-chat when Jiyong entered the lounge.


"JI, MAH MAN!" Kush-oppa greeted him loudly.


My head jerked towards his direction and saw him already looking at me. I smiled at him a bit and he did the same.


I then felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up to see Khun Khun standing beside me, looking at Jiyong.


I looked at Jiyong once again and saw him stared hard at Nichkhun before nodding his head. He didn't look at me anymore as he made his way towards Teddy-oppa.


I heaved a sigh and focused my attention to CL-roo instead who was animatedly narrating his early morning encounter with Seungri-ah.

"What's up, man?" Teddy looked up from the piece of paper he was reading.


"Same same." He raised the sheet of paper he was reading earlier.


"New composition?" I asked as I sat next to him. I grabbed the piece of paper he has set down on the table and read it


"Yep. I'm thinking of making it a digital single for the girls." He pointed towards 2NE1 who were all engaged in a conversation. My eyes landed on her direction and I felt a sting in my heart as I saw Nichkhun sitting so close to her.


I shook my head and turned my attention to Teddy. "This is some serious ake, man!" I complimented him, giving him a pat on his back.


"Oh, gee! Thanks so much, man." He pretended to cry and pulled me in for a hug. I crinkled my nose as I pretended to hug back and made kissy faces. Kush, who was sitting close to us, laughed at our gayness.


"Who needs girls when you have bromance like this?" He snickered loudly, causing the other people around the room to look at us.


They all laughed, even Dara.


That's it, D. Always laugh like that. Make me feel that you are ok so that I could feel that the sacrifice I'm doing is all worth it...

It was close to evening. I have spent my entire afternoon inside Teddy's studio, trying to compose a new song which the boys and I could sing for our next album.


I read the words I have written in my notebook, surprised at how fast I was able to come up with those lines.


'I told you to smile as we drifted apart... 
oh how it breaks this fragile heart...

I said "annyeong" and waved goodbye
and then let out a silent cry

I whispered it's ok as if I'm all good
can't you tell, baby, I'm not in the mod

Maybe you can't see
How this foolish boy longs to be
Around you always

Maybe you can't feel
How my heart longs to be
Around you always

You said we'd be alright
How can I when you're not in my sight

You told me to be patient
I tried so hard but I just can't

You whispered sweet words of longing
Damn I wish I could hold on to this feeling...

Maybe you can't see
How this foolish boy longs to be
Around you always

Maybe you can't feel
How this battered heart longs to be
Around you always


Just be around me
Around me always, D...'


I put down the sheet that I was reading. It was a bold act for me to include her name in my song but I don't care. I have been through all the sh*t and this is the least people can give me.


Just let her be in my world even if it's just in my song...

Practice finished earlier than expected. Everyone was making a buzz, excited to be having some extra time to hang out.


I looked at Bommie, Minji and CL-roo who all looked exhausted from dancing nonstop. I chuckled as Bommie let out her tongue and panted like a cute little puppy.


"YA, SSANTOKKI!" Bommie shouted which made me wince. "ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME?!" She tried to stand up to attack me but her knees became wobbly from too much exhaustion, causing her to slump on the floor and rest there.


"ANIYO!" I rushed towards her side and hugged her, causing her to pant more.


"HAYSSST YOU LITTLE RABBIT!" She grabbed my ears and pulled them repeatedly. Minji laughed hysterically while CL-roo just watched us with an amused look, too tired to even react


"AIYO! AIGOOO AIGOOO BOMMMAAAHHH!!!!" I screamed childishly as she continued pulling my ears. Hayyyssttt the hardships of being a fake maknae! *sniff sniff*


"Aigoo you two... are you sure you are older than us?" CL-roo asked Bommie and I which caused the Bominator to stop her cruel punishment. "You act like kids more than Minki!" Minji raised her head and nodded with a wide smile like an obedient child.


Bommie and I looked at Minji who was showing her aegyo. We both dashed to our maknae and enveloped her in our tightest hugs. "AIGOO... MINKKI-AH!!!!!! SO CUUUTEEEE!!!!!" Bommie and I squealed in unison.


Minji let out a cry for help as her two unnies (that's Bommie and I! *wink*) suffocated her.


"Leader! Leader! HEEELLLPPPPPP!!!!!" Minji cried out like a poor kid being surrounded by two bears. Bommie and I giggled at her helplessness.


"YA! YOU TWO!" CL-roo looked at Bommie and I as if reprimanding us. We both stopped torturing the maknae and anticipated our leader's next action.


Instead of stopping us, she ran towards us and clobbered Minji as well. "AIGOO, MINKKI-AH! OUR BABY'S SO ADORABLE!!!" 


The three of us giggled as Minji pretended to cry. 


As the four of us calmed down, I smiled and heaved a sigh. How I wish life can be as simple as this. I thought.


Just then, I heard my phone rang. I went to my bag to get it and see who was calling.


"Khun Khun..." A smile appeared on my face as I answered the phone.


"Yoboseyo, Khun Khun?" I answered.


"Dara!" He greeted. "Are you done with your practice?" He asked me.


"Neh. We just finished it." I replied while I started fixing my things. I looked around and saw the others doing the same.


"Good! Let's go out tonight, Dara." He invited me. From the way he sounded, I could almost imagine him smiling brightly.


At the back of my mind, Jiyong's face suddenly appeared. I felt guilty all of a sudden.


"Khun Khun..." I was about to answer when an image of Khun Khun's disappointed face earlier came into my mind.


Neh, I need to make it up for him after I ran away earlier. I said to myself.


"Arasso." I answered with a smile. "Where will we meet?" I asked him.


"No worries. I'll pick you up there. Just wait for me." He answered cheerfully that I couldn't help but smile genuinely.


"Alright. I'll just wait for you here, ok?" I told him. He agreed and bade goodbye.


I was about to place my phone back in my bag when I noticed the girls looking at me suspiciously, sitting too close for comfort.


"OMO!" I exclaimed in surprise as I realized that Bommie's face was just a few inches away from mine. "Are you really trying to kill me??" I asked them while still clutching my chest. Aigoo these people really...


"That's Khunnie Boy?" Bommie asked. She raised her eyebrow at me as if saying I would not escape her scrutinizing eyes if I dared lie to her.


"Neh. He's asking me out." I admitted. No sense in hiding that to them because they would ALWAYS, note the emphasis on the word "ALWAYS", find a way to make me spill.


"Wow unnie! He's so fast, neh?" It was Minji's turn to wriggle her eyebrows. I giggled at the maknae's playfulness.


"What about Jingyo-oppa?" CL-roo blurted all of a sudden.


We all fell silent.


I looked at her and smiled, telling her that everything is ok. "CL-roo, we both agreed that being apart is the best for both of us." I told her.


CL-roo looked at me for a long time, as if searching for something.


I heard her murmur something but I didn't get to catch it as it was too soft.


"What was that, CL-roo?" I asked curiously.


"A-ah, ani!" She just frowned a bit before showing her beautiful smile.

"I don't believe Jingyo-oppa will give up just like that..." I muttered under my breath. Beside me, Minji nudged my elbow.


"Ssshh, unnie. Dara-unnie might hear you." She warned me. I looked at her and smiled.


"Mian. I just got carried away." I chuckled.


"But unnie, do you really think that Jingyo-oppa will not give up even after YG-sajangnim allowed Khun-oppa to date Dara-unnie?" Our maknae asked me curiously.


"Neh. I knew him well, Minji. He won't let his butterfly go too far away from him." I answered which made Minji giggle. "He loves her too much." I added with a smile.


I looked at Dara-unnie and made a silent prayer.


I hope you won't give up that easily as well, unnie...














We were still laughing in the practice room when my phone beeped.


D, I'm outside already. =)


I smiled as I read Khun Khun's message.


arasso... i'll be down in a minute. ^-^


I gathered my things and bade goodbye to my girls. Even when I was already halfway outside the room, they continued teasing and bothering me about my first "official" date with Khun Khun.


I, myself, had to laugh at all the giddiness.


I was nearing the front entrance of our building when I realized I need to find someone first.

I made my way to the parking lot where my Bentley was parked. Seung Hyun-hyung and Yang-gaeng were inviting me to go to Woobar awhile ago but I refused for I was not in the mood to party.


"Neh, Jiyong. Just stay at home." I told myself. I knew partying with them with my kind of state right now would just get me into trouble. Plus, I promised D that I will lessen my partying ways.


Thinking about her made me smile again. Neh, D. I am following what you told me. I'm being a good boy lately. I chuckled at my silliness.


Truth was, besides D lecturing me on my partying habits, I, too, was getting tired of doing the same sh*t over and over again.


Dancing. Drinking. Girls throwing themselves at us. Watching people making a fool of themselves. Getting drunk and being careless. Regretting it the next day.


I guess my partying days were starting to subside.


I rubbed my lower shoulder where I was inked with a phrase which mirrored my way of life. 


Too fast to live. Too young to die.


Should I change my tattoo now? I snickered and continued walking towards my car.


I was about to open the door of my car when I felt a slight tap on my shoulder.


I turned around and my eyes lit up upon seeing that particular person standing in front of me, the person I thought I would never be able to talk to again.