I was dead tired and really cold when I finally reached home. My clothes were drenched and my mind in a total mess. Not to mention my broken heart. Without a single thought crossing my empty mind I just took off my clothes, left them on the bathroom floor, took a hot shower and went to bed. I wished this all was just a dream and when I wake up my life would get back to what it used to be.

But as I closed my eyes I realized my bed smelled like Seung Hyun. If only I had any strength left I'd take off the blankets and burn them but I was too tired. It was him last night, it must have been him. His presence spoke for itself.

No one else managed to set me on such a fire. Be it anger, love, tenderness, sadness, any feeling was the extreme of it. That's how he made me feel, like I was on the edge. And now, I was on the edge of a break down.

How foolish of me to try to convince myself it was Jiyong because it will never be Jiyong. Never. No matter how much I want him to be the object of my sad and miserable love that will never be real. Aish, the most annoying thing was that Seung Hyun's scent still could calm me down. Somewhere deep in my heart I refused to believe he was the bad guy but in reality he was, wasn't he?

Since I met him I've always been a little suspicious. Even though I had grown so attracted to him that suspicion had never died. Deep in my heart I knew it, I knew he'd one day crush me like I was nothing. Maybe not because he wanted to do it but more like he was obliged to do so. I still wonder why and I think I always will.

I closed my eyes while hot tears rolled down my cheeks. Nappunnom, such a bad guy. This was the ultimate reason why I never wanted to accept my feelings, because I knew I'd end up alone and hurt. I always do. And I feel sorry for Jiyong too because I have dragged him along so selfishly, relying on his support but ignoring his needs. Hasn't he been the one by my side all this time? Always there, even when I didn't notice.


When I woke up I could barely open my eyes. My whole body ached and I felt sharp pain in my throat. It was hot and cold, I couldn't decide.
 

"Do you want water?"
 

I looked up and saw Jiyong sit on his knees next to my tatami. He was holding a wet cloth, probably about to place it on my forehead. I nodded, I was so thirsty I though I'd die.
 

"Here you go." He helped me to sit up and handed me a glass. I felt his eyes linger on me as I drank. Does he know what happened between me and Seung Hyun? My heart sped up while I thought about this.

"What are you doing here?" I croaked.
 

"Taking care of you. Lie down and go to sleep, you have a high fever."

I did as he ordered and he quickly placed a wet cloth on my forehead. Clumsy cute idiot, it was too wet.
 

"Why are you really here?" I asked my eyes narrowing at his side profile.
 

"Because I knew you'd need me now."
 

He didn't look at me as he spoke. His eyes were directed at the TV screen which made him look a little ignorant but I knew better.

Jiyong has never been a person to show his soft side so he was most probably feeling awkward at the moment. I sighed, at least he came here to take care of me. He is the one who cares the most and I was grateful for that. Of course, when it came to Jiyong I was never willing to show my soft side either, such was our relationship.

"Yeah right..." I whispered.
 

"And I am sorry." His words took me aback.
 

"Last time..." I started. I suppose he was talking about our little strange argument in Seung Hyun's office.
 

"I'm sorry I lost my temper like that" Jiyong sighed and I silently agreed. "But, it's kind of your fault, you know" he added quickly while glancing at me. I gave him a dull look, in the end he always had to ruin everything with his arrogant attitude.
 

"Well I am sorry I didn't understand your cryptic words..."
 

"Sorry, it's just..." his fingers played with a strand of my hair.
 

"Why is everything always about Seung Hyun?"
 

"Let's talk about this when you get better."

He let go of my hair and moved his hand away. His eyes abandoned me and he stared at the TV screen again, clearly not wanting to talk about this. I agreed, my brain wasn't working too well right now. But it was working well enough for me to realize I wasn't wearing the same shirt I wore when I went to bed.

"Jiyong, don't tell me you changed my shirt" My eyes grew wide.
 

"You were sweating like a pig. It had to be changed."
 

But I wasn't even wearing a bra. He must have seen everything.
 

"How could you?!" I raised my voice.
 

"Would you prefer sleeping in a wet shirt and let your condition get worse?" His eyes narrowed at me and I absolutely hated when he did that.
 

"I hate you" I hissed and turned my back at him, the wet cloth sliding off my forehead.
 

"Turn on your back" Jiyong ordered.
 

"No!" I said stubbornly. How could I face him when he had seen everything. I was so embarrassed.
 

"Don't be childish."
 

"Get out of here."
 

"I swear I kept my eyes closed while changing your shirt."
 

"Really?" I asked hopefully as I peeked at him.
 

"Are you an idiot? How could I know when you are not wearing your bra? I thought all girls wear one always."
 

"You could have just said yes right now and the end of discussion" I growled.
 

"You are being so childish, geez" Jiyong complained "It's not like I haven't seen s before and it's not like there is anything to see, anyway."
 

"What? Well thank you" I glared at him, turned away and pulled the comforter over my body. "I hate you, you are the most disgusting erted idiot ever."
 

"Come on" he chuckled. Great and now he was laughing at me. "Let me take your temperature."
 

"NO!"
 

"Dara" he said strictly.
 

"No."
 

"Fine, you don't leave me other opinions." He grabbed my shoulder and pushed me on my back then quickly climbing to sit on top of me.
 

"Get off" I ordered.
 

"Let's take your temperature" he kept smirking.
 

"HELP! I'M GETTING !" I yelled on top of my lungs.
 

"Shut up" Jiyong growled covering my mouth with his hand. I bit him.
 

"OW! You bit.ch."
 

"Get off me bastar.d" I tried to push him off but my body was weak due to the fact I was sick with high fever.
 

"Stay still" he placed his palm against my forehead to keep my head still and placed the thermometer in my mouth. I glared at him.
 

"If you break that in your mouth, you will die" he said with an evil smirk on his face.

I glared at him as I waited for the thermometer to be ready and he looked back at me with that playfully evil expression on his face. He looked like a devil, straight from hell. Where is my bible when I need it the most? Someone sprinkle holy water on him!

I wanted to yell at him but was afraid the thermometer would break. After a few minutes he finally took the thermometer and glanced at it.

"The fever is still pretty high" Jiyong said with a sigh. "You should sleep more."
 

"It's hard when you are sitting there."
 

"You need to keep this on your forehead." He put the wet cloth on my forehead. It's coldness sent shivers down my spine and probably the touch of his fingers too. His hands have always been exceptionally soft.
 

"Get off me."
 

"No, this is such a comfortable position" Jiyong smirked. "Especially if I imagine you without your shirt" he teased.
 

"Get off!!" I yelled and finally managed to push him off. I think he pretended 'to fall' next to me.
 

"Get off my bed too" I kicked him.
 

"You call this a bed?" Jiyong raised a brow.
 

"Just, get out of this apartment."
 

"Then who will take care of you?"
 

"I will do it myself."

Jiyong didn't answer, he just looked at me like I was the cutest thing ever which made me blush a little. But still, even when he was so close I don't think I liked him any more than just as brother, no, friend... I mean, after he dumped me in high school... it's kind of hard to fall for him again.

"Don't stare..." I whispered lowering my eyes.

"But I want to stare." He inched closer. I gulped again wondering what happened to my self determination. If he keeps this up I just might fall for him again, damn. But that might help me to get over Seung Hyun's rejection faster, hmm...

I swear, I am so dirty switching between these guys so mindlessly. But there is something about Jiyong that also touches my heart, triggering my emotions. Something I can't ignore. And hasn't it been Jiyong I have loved all along?

Jiyong in Seung Hyun, what does that even mean? But anyway, it's not like I will get over Seung Hyun in one day but one day I will have to. I need to. Because, between us nothing ever works and it's time to stop hurting.

"What are you doing?" My body stiffened when his warmth hit me and his arms s around my waist.

"I want to take care of you" he whispered hugging me. "Go to sleep."
 

I sighed wondering if I could trust his words. Was he really here because he cared?
 

"Do you really care about me?" I asked weakly.
 

"What do you mean?" He sounded a little disappointed.
 

"Or are you here because of some other reasons?"
 

"You have spent too much time with hyung" Jiyong's hug tightened. "He is just going to hurt you in the end. It's always like that" he whispered.
 

I knew what he meant yet there was this bugging feeling in my chest. Was there more to this matter? Wait, so Seung Hyun hasn't told Jiyong about this afternoon yet? Interesting.
 

"Because he is a bad guy?"
 

"Not necessarily. It's because he is too... Just go to sleep."
 

Great, his words left me even more curious.
 

"I can't sleep when this is bothering me."
 

"I will fix everything" Jiyong my hair. "Everything."
 

"..."
 

"Just go to sleep" he yawned. "You need to rest."
 

Or more like, he was feeling sleepy.

I sighed again, knowing he wouldn't explain anything. Maybe just this once. I'll try trusting him. And when I wake up and hopefully feel better and clear minded, I'll ask him what does it mean that... what the hell do they mean by brothers? Just what the hell?

They keep telling me I love Jiyong but who is Jiyong really? What is it that I love about him? How did it all start and how did I let it develop so far? I wonder too. Let me take a look back because right now I am feeling quite sentimental.

I glanced at Jiyong who was lying next to me, his hand resting on my waist and he was almost asleep already. He was lying far enough so I couldn't hear his breathing, the loser was afraid to get sick so he kept his distance. I sneered at him but then an inevitable smile spread on my lips.

I love the idiot, I really do, in all the wickedness of love.

When I first saw him he was this shy little guy holding tightly onto his mother's hand and hiding behind her legs. He was the guy who got always bullied in the elementary school because he was so pretty and fragile. He was the one being pushed on the ground, called names and left alone. He was the one who cried when he couldn't fall asleep alone, he was the one who was clinging to me in his sleep afraid to be left alone and he was the one who would patiently agree to my every request because I was so scary.

Yes, I made him wear girl's clothes because I didn't want to accept the fact he was a guy, yes I made him play girly games with me, yes I never protected him from the bullies because I was too embarrassed, yes I hated how much I actually cared for him. I am sure because of me he grew up to be such an indifferent middle schooler.

While his shyness slowly faded away and turned into ignorance he became distant. At the playground I always stood up for him if anyone dared to even give him one dirty look but at school I was powerless for I was too into reputation.

They say little boys go through this stage when they are day dreaming at random moments and he was day dreaming all the time. You couldn't tell what was going behind his eyes and he never liked to speak about his thoughts or feelings.

He became the guy who always ruined my dreams about undying love and princes in shining armor. He was the one who kept telling me my mother would never come back because she hardly cared for me. He was the one who laughed at love saying it never existed anywhere. He ruined the fairy tales for me, he forced me to abandon my dreamy childish way of thinking and kicked me into cold harsh reality. He was so mean and cold.

Yet, he still preferred to hold onto me while sleeping because he was just a sad little boy and he still cried easily. Not so openly anymore but still... so easily. Somewhere inside of him ran a scar so deep it was hard to understand. But I knew, he was hurt and angry. He despised the world all alone and by himself, he hated everything lovely and beautiful. This is how he became bitter.

It was in junior high when we both became particularly interested in basketball and from then on Jiyong became the popular guy. Mainly because he was smart too, always studying. Sometimes I wonder if he was so hardworking because I always kept telling him he was stupid.

Whatever happened to that girly weak guy I don't know, Jiyong was still pretty as ever but he wasn't a weakling anymore. He grew up to be strong and healthy and, in so many ways, ironic and sarcastic (thanks to me). He was known as the captain of the basketball club and I as super protective sister of his.

Whenever I found out some girl was interested in him I would make her give up in one way or another. My ways weren't always exactly nice or peaceful, actually they never were. It was not a surprise a bully grew up to be a bigger bully. No changes happened in my arrogant, self absorbed and egoistic character while I turned older and older, I guess I was born to be a bit.ch. And he, there were moments he was the purest angel and moments when he was the meanest devil of them all. So it was hard to tell who was worse, me or him. I think our parents spoiled us too much...

In high school I got my group of friends and we became the queenkas of the school, sort of naturally. People admired us, looked up to us and respected us but Jiyong couldn't give a damn. He was too absorbed into his studies and basketball. I let everyone know we weren't actually blood related because damn I was jealous of every single girl who got his attention.

I tried so hard to get his attention but why is it that I was always left in the shadows? This was the peak of my love, when it was the strongest in flame and almost burned me alive. Whenever he was close to me I would shiver and tremble but I was too stubborn and proud to ever let him notice anything. I went on group and blind dates, I went to parties, I was having the happiest time of my life or so I thought. But without him everything was so dull.
 

Then one day he confessed.
 

And then he dumped me without any reason.
 

He never apologized.
 

And then he left.
 

This doesn't make any sense, does it?

 

Yes, at some point Jiyong changed. Or did he? I guess, he changed back into the junior high Jiyong who was always in his own little world by himself and who didn't care about anyone else. He grew distant, it's as if he had suddenly stopped caring.

Up to this point he'd always buy me a birthday present, sometimes he'd appear in my room and climb on my bed saying he couldn't fall asleep or even help me study. He'd cook my favorite food, he'd walk me to school and back, he'd even carry my bag if I wanted to, but then... he just stopped caring.

After high school we had to face the biggest tragedy of our lives when our parents passed away in a car crash. He was so aloof during this time and distant to the point I sometimes forgot I was living with someone.

He never offered me the comfort I needed, he was never home. Who knows what in the world happened in his head when he refused to go to college or university. That had been his dream since forever, to study even more. I was so angry at him because his brain was going to waste like this.

He became a troublemaker, getting involved into some gang business or who knows what. Loan sharks became frequent visitors in our house and I even stopped buying new furniture and cleaning up because I knew they'd appear again and ruin everything anyway. I wonder how I didn't end up working for them too? Don't tell me it's my small chest that saved me?

Somehow I still managed to get a job with reasonable pay. Actually. Jiyong wasn't that useless either, sometimes he'd smack a thick stack of money on the table and tell me it's mine now. I did ask him where did he get that much money from but he never told me and I got this feeling it was better not to know. Our situation was so bad I couldn't refuse, no matter how dirty that money was.

We argued a lot but still our life together was fun. We had movie nights and lazy mornings, while I was working he did laundry and washed dishes even though he hated it. But he never cooked again, he stopped reading books and he finally learned how to sleep alone.

Sometimes he'd help me with my job and work in my place so I'd get my well deserved day off. Sometimes he wasted our money on stupid things and then refused to take them back to refund. It was me who'd sneak out during the nights and in the morning he'd forget about it anyway. Actually, life was pretty good. It was perfect in it's own non perfect way.

But then.

He left.

3 and half years passed.

Bam.

Seung Hyun


Now I am here with these thoughts and endless questions. Who will give me answers or will I never find out the truth? Maybe I should have listened to the little Jiyong and stopped believing in love back then? Because love sure is hurting me now.

Seung Hyun. Where did he come from? Why didn't I know Jiyong had such a brother and... and why did I fall in love with him like this?

Just why?
 

It was cold and hard, sleeping has never felt so awful before. As my senses came back to me I slowly realized I was lying on the bare floor. I opened my eyes and saw Jiyong sleep on my tatami with his legs and hands spread in x position. He was lying on his stomach, facing me and there was a satisfied smile on his lips. He looked warm and comfortable and it pissed me off.

"YAH!" I yelled.
 

"What now?" His eyes fluttered open.
 

"You kicked me on the floor."
 

"You should have crawled back..." he said dryly. "It's still early, let me sleep." He pulled the comforter over his shoulders and turned his back at me.
 

"Get off my bed" I grabbed the comforter trying to pull it off of him but he wasn't letting go.

Where did the sweet Jiyong go to?!
 

"Don't annoy me."
 

"You bastar.d! How dare you treat a sick person like this?" I hit his side.
 

"You don't look sick at all."
 

"Well, I am."
 

"Stop it" Jiyong propped his upper body on his elbows. "I stayed up all night taking care of you, let me sleep."
 

"You don't look like you stayed up" I grabbed the pillow and hit him in the face.
 

"I- ooofff..."
 

"Take this" I hit him several times before he managed to grab the pillow and throw it away.
 

"Mental " he glared at me.
 

"Psycho bastar.d" I glared back at him.
 

"You are really childish, did you know that?"
 

"And you are stupid. Get off my bed."
 

"Fine, then take your stupid bed!" he yelled, stood up and walked to the bathroom.
 

"It would have been better if you walked out of here" I yelled back and covered myself with the comforter. Great now my bed stunk like Jiyong. Seung Hyun's scent made me calm down but Jiyong's just made angrier. I hate his scent!

After some time Jiyong walked out from the bathroom. "Get up and take a shower."
 

"No, I am sleepy."
 

"Get up now" he poked me with his foot.
 

"I said I don't want to!" I snapped.
 

"It's late."
 

"Just now you sad it was early."
 

"Now I'm saying it's late."
 

"Geez, are you still 15 years old?"
 

In an instant the comforter was pulled off of me.
 

"Just let me be" I turned around and glared at Jiyong.
 

"It's not every day that I offer to take someone to eat, so don't you dare to decline" he hissed.
 

"Nowadays it seems to be every day..."
 

"Shut up and get ready."
 

"I said I don't want to."
 

"And I am saying you don't want to know what I will do if you keep up that stubborn attitude."

He must have acted so angry because he was shy. I would say it was cute but he got me too annoyed to think positively. But hey, at least it was a free meal and I needed some fresh air. Maybe I was still feeling a little weak but the fever was gone already. I got up and got ready, took me about 15 minutes. Meanwhile Jiyong lied on the sofa and watched TV, completely ignoring me. I think that was for the best.

"Okay I'm ready" I said and he glanced at me as if checking if my clothes were good enough.

I was expecting a sarcastic comment because I wasn't wearing my best dress but he didn't say a thing, he just walked past me to the small hallway and started putting on his shoes. How friendly, I could tell he was still mad.

Like always, Jiyong was driving recklessly and I was holding onto my seat fearing my life would be over any minute now. Luck was on my side because after a short ride Jiyong finally parked his car in front of a small restaurant and we were still alive. Or then we died and continued our lives in hell...

He liked small restaurants, didn't he? I waited for him to get out of the car and for my surprise he even opened the door for me before I got to it. Giving him a weird look I climbed out from the car and followed him inside.

It was a cozy restaurant, not very busy at this time of the day. We were lead to a corner table in front of a window and the waitress brought us the menu. She was eying Jiyong as if she wanted to have him for dessert and I looked sourly after her as she walked away. I was expecting her to stay around and try to flirt with him but it turns out she just walked away. At least she had some manners left...

"Jealous?"

I turned my head and saw Jiyong smirking at me.
 

"About what? You?" I asked sarcastically.
 

His smirk faded and he picked up the menu, hiding his face behind it. "You are paying for your own food."
 

"Don't be stingy, bastar.d brother."
 

"Ya, .ty sister, do you want to eat or not?" he peeked over his menu, a witty smile forming on his lips. I snorted, my eyes darting at my menu and running over all the possible dishes I could have.
 

"So, what are you going to eat?" I finally looked up, Jiyong's eyes stayed glued at his menu.
 

"I don't know..." he mumbled. "Maybe steak. And you?"
 

"I don't know either." Truthfully speaking I didn't have any appetite.
 

"Do you want to go somewhere else?"
 

"It's okay."
 

"Should we order?"

Screw this stupid small talk.

"So, you and Seung Hyun are bothers?"
 

Jiyong's hold of his menu tightened but his face stayed as indifferent as usual. "I don't know what you are talking about" He glanced at me. Very sleek and smooth, buddy. But no use to lie because I already know it all. Hah.
 

"I heard it from Seung Hyun's mouth so there is no way you can escape this now. Explain."
 

"Later."
 

"I want to know now."
 

Jiyong leaned back in his seat and threw his menu on the table, already looking defeated. He is way easier to break than Seung Hyun.

"What's there to tell, yes we are brothers and so what?" He finally looked at me his eyes glassy. His whole being signaled his unwillingness to speak and his mouth formed a straight line. He almost looked like a politician caught in a web of lies.
 

"But how did you get separated, how did you meet again? How did you even find out about him?"
 

Jiyong shrugged. "Things happened."
 

"Yah! This is not some insignificant matter."
 

"But you don't need to go to the details. Just accept that we are brothers and live on. You can even pretend you never found out."
 

"So you are suggesting I don't care about this?"
 

"What?" Jiyong's brows arched. "I can see you care but don't be too noisy."
 

"Noisy? Do you really think I ask because I am just curious?" My nails were digging into the table cloth as I gritted my teeth in anger.
 

"Has it ever crossed your mind that I am actually worried? I can't stand being left out from every single matter. You are my family and I am concerned but you don't seem to care about that, do you? I am just a nuisance, aren't I? Very well then, just go mingle with your dear hyung and his bitc.hes. You both go to hell all I care!" I shrieked as I sprung up from my seat. Jiyong rubbed his forehead and lowered his gaze.

"Just calm down" he mumbled quietly, probably embarrassed by all the stares we got.
 

"I'm leaving, have a nice meal!" I growled, grabbed the menu and tossed it at his head. "Goodbye."

The nerve, does he always have to be like this?! I am sick of fighting with him. All I want is some open dialogue instead of warfare but no, I wonder if there will ever be peace between us? Probably not. If I was Russia and he America during the cold war period earth wouldn't exist anymore.

I thought Jiyong wouldn't follow me but he did, he caught up to me only on the other side of the road.
 

"You need to eat something" he said now a lot calmer.
 

"I'll do that by myself" I snapped.
 

"I'm sorry" Jiyong's hand landed on my shoulder.
 

"Don't be" I slapped his hand away. "I don't need your apology."
 

"Come on" his hand found my shoulder again.
 

"Just leave me alone!" I yelled making a few by passers tun their curious eyes at us.
 

Jiyong let out a frustrated sigh as he ran his hand through his hair.
 

"I am sorry I am not telling you much. I would like to tell you everything but I can't, there are certain obligations that are keeping my mouth shut a-"
 

"Seung Hyun?" I glared at him and he shifted his gaze off of me. "Does he control your life or something? Is he your God?"
 

"It's not like that." Jiyong frowned. "I also think it's not the right time for you to find out about this."
 

"And when is the right time? When it's too late?!" I yelled, small tears gathering in the corners of my eyes. "Will I only find out after someone dies and leaves me a long letter explaining everything and begging for forgiveness?"
 

"You are overreacting."
 

"Sure" I scoffed. "I care about you because you are the only one I have. I am scared of losing you, of being left alone again. Of course, that's just overreacting."
 

Jiyong looked at me helplessly.

"You are the only one left." I whispered, my heart squeezing from pain.

"And you are going to leave me again, aren't you?"
 

"Stop talking" Jiyong breathed out. "You are making everything worse."
 

"I am making what worse?"
 

He didn't say anything.
 

"See, because you never tell me anything."
 

"I told you I can't."

"Because you are Seung Hyun's dog!"

Jiyong's eyes squinted in an angry glare. "What did you just say?"
 

"I said, you are Seung Hyun's dog, nothing more!"
 

He gritted his teeth, anger sweeping over his face. "Listen, he is the one who owes me, not the other way around."
 

"Owes you what?" I crossed my arms over my chest.
 

"My life!" Jiyong spat the words from his mouth.
 

For a second I froze and then blinked, Jiyong kept glaring at me and I swallowed my surprise.
 

"So what? How do I relate to this all?" I frowned. But didn't Seung Hyun once say that Jiyong doesn't want to give him his life back or to whatever they referred with the word 'life'. That was long ago, how come I still remember?

 

Quote

"What do you guys want from me?" I asked bluntly. What's the use to beat around the bushes? I wanted for Seung Hyun to answer but he didn't as if he had lost his gift of speech. "I thought about it but I have nothing valuable. Why don't you tell me what do you want and I will give it to you? Then you two can just fight about it together and not mix me into the mess" I tried my best to stay calm and collected while speaking but Seung Hyun didn't seem to appreciate that, he just flashed an ironic smile.
"You can't give me what I want" he said quietly.
"What do you want?"
"Give me back eight years of my life. Turn back time and I will get what I want." I just stared at him dumbfounded. Taeyang did mention something similar.
"Then what does Jiyong want?"
"Tsh" Seung Hyun scoffed. "He doesn't want me to turn back time."
"What?" They both are mental, definitely.
"Don't ask Pepsi, it's impossible to explain" Seung Hyun sighed. "Not anymore" he glanced at me from the corners of his eyes and for a second he looked sad. "Not when the moon is broken."
"What?"
"Nothing can be explained anymore. It's too messed up, too twisted too..." he paused for a while and then smiled bittersweetly. "Too tragic."

"You are in the middle of this all" Jiyong simply said.

"Is this about that Soo Yeon girl?"
 

"Maybe."
 

"Why don't you tell me what happened? Seung Hyun stole Bom from you but then he fell in love with Soo Yeon but she fell in love with you?" I guessed.
 

"She did?" Jiyong raised a brow. I gave him a weird look...

"What, you love her too?" I asked with irony in my voice.

"Let me think" Jiyong tapped his lower lip with his index finger.

"At some point I did."

His answer surprised me a little. What kind of triangle was this exactly? "And where is she now?" I inquired.

"Just around" Jiyong shrugged slipping his hands in the pockets of his pants.

"So she is really alive?"

He nodded.

"Then why the he.ll did you get me involved into this mess? Why doesn't Seung Hyun go after her? What do I have to do with this all? WHAT? Tell me now!" This is something I have been dying to find out. Where the hell is this bit.ch hiding?!

"Because I am not letting Seung Hyun get that girl."

"And why are you doing that?"

"Because he will hurt her."

"Let me think, he loves her but will hurt her?" I asked sarcastically. Sounds kind of familiar...

"Because, he thinks I like her too."

"Oh, and what does it have to do with anything?"

"Because he feels guilty for taking everything away from me and..." Jiyong suddenly hesitated.

"Didn't he give everything back to you." I raised a brow.

Jiyong scoffed. "It's not possible to give everything back to me. It's not possible to turn back time."

I furrowed my brows. This is something Seung Hyun said as well.

 

Quote

"I gave you everything you wanted so why aren't you co-operating now?"
"Hyung, the thing is, I want her" Jiyong chuckled "I don't want anything else."
"Yeah?" Seung Hyun growled, he was starting to get really angry. "What do you think I am giving you?"

"Fine, then... Why don't you tell him that you don't like the girl?" I finally asked.

"I can't."

"You can't?" I breathed out in despair, these stubborn idiots! I am surrounded by idiots.

"First of all, he wouldn't believe me and the second, maybe I like her after all. I haven't decided yet" Jiyong his lips. Did I just see him smirk?

"Are you two pulling me into this mess just because I look like her?"

"Yes and no!"

"Go die" I said sourly and after one final glare started walking away from him.

If he wasn't willing to give me answers then I wasn't willing to waste my time on him. Besides, how did the topic shift from Jiyong and Seung Hyun being brothers to Soo Yeon? Aish whatever, I don't care anymore. This is getting too complicated. Lee Jun Ki, Lee Jun Ki, Lee Jun Ki, Lee Jun Ki...

"Dara, don't be like this."

"Leave me alone. I hate you and Seung Hyun, you two bastar.ds are just messing around with me for fun! You don't know how hard life has been lately! Go fck him, you two deserve each other..."

"Don't think too much."

"Don't follow me."

"Listen to me" Jiyong grabbed my wrist.

"Let me go."

"No, we need to talk."

"About what?"

"Aish!"

"Let me go" I jerked my hand but he didn't let me go. "It hurts."

"If you really like Seung Hyun then-"

"I don't like anyone!" I yelled. "Will you two just leave me out of this!"

"Don't scream."

"I will if I want."

"Shut up!"

"No you shut up!"

"You guys are fighting again?"

We both turned our heads to the side and saw Taeyang standing a few feet away. His eyes darted between us while his lips curled in a small smile. Fancy randomly bumping into him on the street, of all people.

"Help me" I pleaded but Taeyang just raised a brow.

"You!" Jiyong's eyes narrowed at me.

"OWWW. It hurts" I faked.

"Stop filming, let's go!" Jiyong started to drag me away. "We need to talk" he mumbled.

"I told you let me go!" I yelled even louder. "I don't want to go anywhere with you! Leave me alone! I hate you, basta.rd!"

"And I told you to shut up, bit.ch."

"That's enough" I heard Taeyang sigh.

"Don't get involved" Jiyong hissed.

"She doesn't want to go with you..."

"Go back to your gay hole and mind your own business unless you don't want to die by my hands today, homo."

"What?" Taeyang's voice sharpened. "Dare to repeat that fcking maggot and I'll go fck your mother!"

"Oh yeah?" Jiyong spun around, his fierce eyes darting at Taeyang's serious face. "Guess what? I already fcked your mother, it was pretty bad."

Taeyang cleared his throat when our eyes met. I silently pleaded him to stop this argument before it got any worse because Jiyong was in a bad mood already and I didn't want a fight to erupt between these two in the middle of the streets. Knowing them...

"Let her go" Taeyang was already standing at my side. "You are not letting her go?"

"Who the fck do you think you are?" Jiyong scoffed.

Taeyang's eyes darted at Jiyong's hand that was holding mine.

"Get going before I kick your nerdy a.ss."

"Don't get me angry" Taeyang said dead serious "Let her go."

I glanced at him, surprised by how intimidating he sounded again. Jiyong let go of my hand and pushed me to the side, I stumbled but Taeyang caught me pulling me behind himself. Jiyong gave us a sarcastic look and scoffed even louder than before.

I took a deep breathe and rubbed my forehead, well at least Taeyang made me feel at ease no matter if he was angry and intimidating. He wasn't part of their crazy world. He was keeping me sane. I mean he was a part of their world but he wasn't tied to it like they were.

"You wanna die?"

"Or do you wanna die?"

"Look at this geesekki, pissing me off on purpose."

"You asked for this!"

Truthfully speaking I didn't expect punches to be flying but that's what happened. Both guys managed to dodge each other's hits but then Taeyang hit Jiyong's chin and Jiyong hit him in the eye. I rolled my eyes.

"Don't" I grabbed a fistful of Taeyang's jacket "Let's go."

Taeyang took a deep breathe and stepped away.

"Watch your back" Jiyong said coldly.

In answer Taeyang just scoffed, grabbed my hand and lead me away. Jiyong didn't even try to stop us and I was too angry to stay with him any longer. We both needed to calm down.

We walked in silence for a while and then Taeyang finally spoke. "So what happened now?"

"You don't want to know" I answered indifferently. I felt him letting go of my hand but I held onto his. I needed to hold onto him for a little longer because I was afraid I'd go crazy.

His words and his touch calmed me down taking my thoughts off the mess created by Jiyong and Seung Hyun. I felt so thankful having a friend like him.

"You know you can tell me."

"Fine, then did you know about Seung Hyun and Jiyong being brothers?"

Because Taeyang didn't say anything I turned to look at him and saw him bit his lower lip. I pulled on his hand and he snapped back to reality.

"Brothers? No, I didn't know. What do you mean?"

"You are lying" I squinted my eyes at him. "You know everything, don't you?"

Taeyang smiled his angelic smile. "No, I know nothing."

"Ya, you know!" I whined. "Tell me."

"I am serious."

"No, you are not."

His angelic smile disappeared and he looked stern. "When I say I don't know, I don't. And even if you keep whining it doesn't mean I will magically find out" he said with monotone voice.

I looked away from him, getting his message. He'd never speak and I didn't doubt for he was the Jjang after all.

"Sorry..."

"No, I am sorry." He sighed. "Let's not talk about this. Don't worry, do you want to go home?"

"I'm hungry."

"Then wanna go eat at that noodle place" Taeyang suggested. He glanced at our hands and I tried to pull mine away but he squeezed it gently. Assuring me it was okay to told onto him.

"Don't worry, I know you need some support now. Life must be hard, eh?"

I smiled by myself, knowing at least someone was worried about my shaky mentality.

"Yeah" I said shyly as I lowered my eyes.

Kind of awkward but the moment sent beautiful sensation down my spine. His hand was warm and his presence so calming. He was like the only link between my old life and my new life. He was suddenly so secure, so trustworthy, kind and calm. What made him look boring before made him more than appealing now.

Why didn't I fall for him earlier? Or maybe, would it be possible to fall in love with him now? I looked up but that's when my stomach growled loudly. Forget about it, Taeyang is more like a brother.

"You seem to be hungy." His gentle chuckle reached my ears.

"So hungry I am dying." I smiled.

"Let's take a seat then." He pulled a chair out for me, come to think of it, he has always been a gentleman. As I watched him sit across me, my eyes fell on the bruise.

"Does it hurt?" I asked pointing at his eye.

"It stings a little" Taeyang flashed a weak smile. "That duck idiot sure hits hard."

"Sorry."

"Don't be. This is nothing new."

I sighed. Right, who am I kidding here worrying about a guy who once was a leader of a vicious gang.

It was an open restaurant and we took our seats near the road, I watched cars zoom by. The food and drinks were soon brought to our table and we ate mostly in silence. It was relaxing to just sit with him and enjoy boredom. I remembered myself saying to Seung Hyun that sometimes boring is better than exciting. Those vice words... Then why the hell did I choose exciting instead of boring, why?

After the meal Taeyang walked me home even though it was still just afternoon. We didn't talk much, just chit chatted about random things. But when we stopped in front of my apartment building his face suddenly took a serious shade and he took my hand into his.

"Dara, I've been wanting to tell you something" he cleared his throat. Looking at him I suddenly thought maybe he wanted to confess. We did hold hands earlier...

"I" he hesitated. "I..." his brown eyes stared at me as if asking for help. Maybe he