“I am sorry, but she lost her baby. I need to do an emergency D&C (curette) to her to clean her uterus, and she needs blood transfusion. She lost a lot of blood. She experienced a heavy bleeding and strong cramping that she fainted. You should brought her earlier. But miscarriage is a very common thing that happens to pregnant woman. It’s caused by the chromosomes problems. I have to work, i am sorry for your loss, Sir.”

‘Miscarriage is a very common thing that happens to pregnant woman especially for the first marriage’

But why her? Why does it happen to my family? I lost my baby, and i nearly lost my wife. I should have came back home earlier. I should have found her earlier. Or maybe i should spent today with her, or shouldn’t let her go out of the house. I am so frustated! Why it has to be her?

**

“Everything is gonna be alright, Hae-ah.” Yesung and Heechul comforted him, caressing his back as he buried his face on his palm, don’t want to show his face to the others. All of Super Junior members were gathering there, Sungmin and Ryeowook just came after finishing their radio filming. It was passed midnight and the hospital still busy with the doctors and nurses checking up on patients. Kyuhyun and Eunhyuk, sat on the hospital bench together with Sungmin and Ryeowook who just came. The hall where ____’s room located was guarded by security at the end of the hall to avoid fans or whoever to take photos.

“What happened?” Ryeowook whispered anxiously to Kyuhyun. He just shrugged, his brain couldn’t think of a sentence to explain to the other magnae. It seemed unreal. He, Donghae and the other members of SJ had just bragged about her pregnancy to other band such as SHINee and TVXQ when they were at Busan to attend a Busan concert. Changmin, Taemin and Minho couldn’t hide their feeling and kept bugging Donghae by saying that they’d pay a visit to her in the house  everyday just to see her condition. Kyuhyun told Changmin that Donghae forbid her to go out without him, and he is being an annoying protective husband-choosing her food and stuffs, and it made Changmin planned to kidnap ____ for a day  to take her to a restaurant and have a delicious meal together-just both of them. That teasing conversation just happened hours ago, and now they were waiting at the hospital for her condition.

Yesung was the one who found her, laying on the ground with a white dress. It was night and the garden was dark, he thought he saw a ghost at first. But at that time, Donghae, himself and the others were looking for her since they couldn’t found her when they paid a visit and they were planning to have a sleep over a night there. Then he saw the tea cup on the floor and slippers. When he was on his way to approach her, he realized that there was a huge red stain of blood at the bottom part of her dress. He saw her face and what happening to her, scared him. He carried her body, informing the others then they immediately rushed to the hospital.

Heechul was informed by Siwon, who was now at church, praying. Heechul grabbed his car key and headed out, leaving his radio show hanging. He was sitting silently, next to Donghae. He knew his personality so well, and even though his dongsaeng didn’t make a single sound but the truth is he was crying. His wife was also one of the person that he cared, that’s why he was still there or else he would be at his room sleeping peacefully. ‘i will go to the church for sure, and follow what Siwon has been saying about his religion if she’s okay.’he thought.

The leader, Leeteuk, was leaning against the wall, he was so worried but seeing Donghae’s state, he couldn’t help but hide his own worry. He showed a calm expression but inside, his mind was full in deep thought. Henry and Eunhyuk were crying hard, both of their face was covered by their hoodie. They kept wipe their nose with tissues. Shindong was crying silently, it’s very rare for the big guy to shed a tear, he thought of Nari to experience the same thing as her. It’d broke his heart and somehow he felt what Donghae felt. Despite his tiredness and awkwardness with Donghae, he still there. His presence is much better rather than comforting him verbally.

The door finally opened.

“Doctor, how’s her condition?” Leeteuk spoke, represent Donghae to talk cause he knew Donghae couldn’t opened his mouth right now.

“She’s resting right now. No visitors are allowed in this hour so please come back tomorrow. Where’s her husband?” the doctor said and he eyed everyone in the hall. Donghae stood up and approached him, telling that he is her husband.

“Mr.Lee, i need to inform you some important things about your wife.  I am sorry for your loss, i have done my best and-“  before the doctor completed his sentence, Donghae grabbed him by collar. His eyes were red and puffy from crying, he looked mad, frustated. That wasn’t cheerful Donghae people used to know. Seeing his sudden harsh action startled everyone. Leeteuk immediatey tried to push his hands away from the doctor while Sungmin and Zhoumi pulled him away from behind. His tight grip on the collar released.

“SHE WILL BE OKAY IF YOU DID MORE!!! I WILL NOT LOSS MY SON IF YOU TRIED HARDER!”

Donghae yelled, trying to free himself from their grasp. He tried to kick. Kyuhyun and Yesung came to help Sungmin and Zhoumi.

The doctor fixed his collar and dusted himself of his medical coat as Leeteuk bowed 90’ to apologize. Thank God there was no one around or else, it’d be a big problem.

“It’s okay, it happens a lot to me.” He patted Teukkie’s shoulder, indicate that that’s okay and no need to apologize. “Mr.Lee, as a doctor, i really put my best to save people’s life. In your wife’s case, she has lost the baby when she reached here. She bleed too much and i’m saving her life, and what’s happening to your baby, it’s because of the chromosome problem which happens for no reason. It’s not your fault nor your wife, but i suggest you to calm yourself before you visit her tomorrow because her feeling is worst than you. Now if you excuse me.” He finished and walked away.

Feeling that Donghae has calmed down, Yesung, Kyuhyun, Sungmin and Zhoumi slowly released their grasp from him. He fell on his knees, he lowered his head and cried hard. No one ever saw this kind of state of him, they just stared at him and slowly their vision started to blur with tears.

With a heavy breath and hoarse voice, Leeteuk dared himself to open his mouth, breaking the harrow silence and being a leader means he needs to decide something in that situation. “Let’s go back first.”

**

“Donghae-ah, be brave for her. She needs you.” Leeteuk’s eyes and Donghae’s met, Donghae nodded. He was crying all night long and didn’t even sleep. He yelled, he cried, he punched his pillow and wall, causing his knuckles to be wounded.The members also find it hard to sleep last night. Leeteuk has been accompanying Donghae last night and gave him some advices. He made Donghae realized that he couldn’t blame anyone for this and he should be strong for her, He has to calm himself before he go to the hospital, and made him promise he will behave or else  he can’t join Leeteuk and the others to visit his own wife. The members were waiting to enter the room, but they let Donghae to have some private moment with her first.

He twisted the door knob and with a heavy nervous sigh, he entered.

There she was, lying weakly on the hospital bed, she was awake but she stared on the window. She didn’t even moved her eyes to him as he took a seat next to her bed.

He grabbed her hand and held it tight. No one started a conversation and both kept silent. He looked at his wife. Her looks to the window was blank, the infusion tube was attached on her thin wrist, her face was pale, maybe because she lost a lot of blood yesterday? He thought himself.  He let out a sigh again. There was desire inside him, to touch her face, kiss her lips and tell her that everything is okay but he just couldn’t do it. Seeing her face remind him of her pregnancy and her miscarriage-bringing back the happiness he felt during her pregnancy and the disappointment and pain inside his heart that he felt yesterday.

His vision started to blur, tears slowly formed in his eyes again. He used the back of his hand to wipe the tears away, he has to be strong, he told himself. She felt worst than him, the baby was there inside her, and now its gone. She must be feeling more upset than him. He must show that he is strong enough and pretend like it’s okay to happen to them, just for her. He had to hide his own hurt feeling and buried it deep down in his heart, he didn’t want her to see his weak state-because somehow it’d break her more, he thought. Everything happens for a reason, he kept thinking about that phrase, but what’s the reason for loss? No one got advantages of this. Why this has to happen to them?  He was mad, upset, anger almost controlled him, he kept assumed back in his mind that his wife couldn’t take care of their kid. But Leeteuk made him erased that thought. He hasn’t told his dad, and Grandpa yet.

“She flew with the dandelion petals, she gave me a ballon and she’s gone.” She spoke in small voice but he heard it.

He didn’t respond as he kept listening.

“She was beautiful, she has your eyes and your lips. Her smile was beautiful. Her eyes were beautiful. Everything of her was beautiful.  But she flew away.”

“Who are you talking about ____-ah?” Donghae was confused as his wife kept talking nonsense. Who is the girl she is talking about? What’s dandelion petals and ballon she’s referring to? Why does she look so peace and calm?

“She was so pretty and she gave me  a balloon then she flew away.”  She repeated. Her eyes wasn’t focused, it seemed like she was imagining things.

“Stop it! What are you talking about ____?” he snapped. The tone of his voice was high, and she used to be startled and cried whenever he used his high voice, but she didn’t give any response. She didn’t even look at him, she still set her eyes at the window. She was strangely calm.

She didn’t spoke a word afterwards, while he just shot him a death glare full of wonder. What’s on her mind? He thought.

He took a deep breath to calm himself and sat down. He stared at the floor and his tears started to blur his vision again. He has cried too much and now he cried again in front of his wife. He felt frustated  at ____’s condition, he expected her to at least cry or let out a scream at him. He expected her to show a sad expression, not expressionless. He expected her to at least say her feeling, to be angry at him to let the doctor take away her baby. He willingly to accept her punch or kick or slaps  if she feels to do so to him,  But why sh-

He heard a small soft, he lifted his head and saw tears ran down her cheek.

“____-ah...”

“We lost her, aren’t we?” she whispered, her hand went to her stomach, “She isn’t inside here anymore, is she?”

Donghae couldn’t find a good word to reply, should he say yes? Or no?  He just grabbed her weak hand and brought it close to his face, covered his wet eyes against it.  He cried on her hand.

“I am a fail mother...

 I don’t deserve to live my life if my daughter doesn’t .” She pulled her hand away from his grasp, sat up even though her head was dizzy and heavy, her hair was messy because she had been lying for a quiet long time, and her other hand began to pull the IV tube away from her vein.

“YA! ____ ! Doctor!!”

HEHEHE SORRY FOR THE SAD UPDATE!!

JUST WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER OKAY? 

:):)