Seonhee's POV

"Mommy," the little girl called out. She was wearing a grey skirt and white blouse and had her brown hair in a high ponytail, with uher hair curling into locks at the end. She had just came back from her school and was running to show her mother her exam paper.

Her mother looked oddly familiar in her long beige skirt, black blouse and a neat tight bun on her hair.

"Look mommy!" she exclaimed, her face flushed from running. A huge smile was plastered on her face and pride was evident in the twinkle in her eyes. "I got 88 out of 100. Highest in class!"

She looked up at her mother in expectation. Her mother took the paper into her hand and frowned, flipping through the Maths exam paper. After flipping a few pages, she stopped at one page, reading and analyzing what was written. Then her frown turned into a look of disappointment.

She looked down at the expectant little girl, her eyes full of anything but pride and joy.

"How could you make this kind of mistake? All the points you lost was because you were careless. You could have gotten a perfect score! 88 is not good enough..."

She handed back the paper to the little girl and turned back into the house, leaving the 9 year old girl to look at her paper. Feeling nothing of the joy and pride she felt earlier. Instead all she felt was...

I was inadequate. I wasn't good enough.

Tears began to pour from her eyes, as she stood outside their house. Slowly, she squat down onto the ground. A girl shaking with tears, a contrasting image in the beautiful garden where she sat.

I wanted to reach out to her, comfort her and give her a warm hug, telling her that it's alright. That it doesn't matter whether she got a perfect score, as long as she did her best.

As I walked towards her, she looked up at me, her glare intense and frightening.

"Its all your fault," she said and then she ran off, dropping her paper. I was shocked by what she had said.

In what way was it my fault? I looked at the paper she had left, bending down to pick it up.

But it was no longer an elementary Maths exam paper.

Hematology Test 2012. Name: Kim Seonhee. Score: 48/100.

I stood rooted to the ground, my eyes transfixed on the paper in my hand.

Then suddenly I was plunged into pitch black darkness. There was nothing above me, nothing below me, nothing on any of my side.

I wanted to tear the paper in my hand but the paper seemed to have turn into a rock, disallowing me to tear it into a million pieces.

Disembodied voice echoed in that pitch blackness. Voices that were familiar, voices that I have heard all my life.

"You were careless...!"

"88 is not good enough..."

"What kind of person scores this low? Stop being lazy Seonhee..."

"You didn't try hard enough..."

"Talk to me when you have reflect on how badly you did on this paper. 93 is unacceptable..."

"Why can't you perfect it?.."

"This is not good enough.."

"This is not good enough.."

I tried to cover my ears, not wanting to hear anymore of the voices. But it appears to echo as well in my head because despite covering my ears as tight as I could, the voices only got even louder, ringing loud and clear.

"This is not good enough.."

"Not good enough..."

"Not good enough..."

"Not enough..."

"Not enough..."

"Not enough..."

Then I fell from the darkness where I stood into an empty black hole, extending the same pitch blackness.

With a painful twitch on my leg, I woke up, cold sweat pouring down from my forehead.

I was back in my own bedroom, lying on my bed in the darkness, room only lit with a tiny bedside lamp.

It was just a dream. No. It was a nightmare.

It is not true that the only way I could feel valued and loved is to be perfect, I tried to convince myself.

I turned to look at the clock on my bedside table.

3:05am.

My friends care about me even if I'm not as perfect as I would like to be.

But who are my friends now?

And with all the strength I was left with, I curled myself into a ball and cried myself to sleep.

.

Eunhyuk's POV

Its already 3.05 am and I'm still wide awake. I was lying on my bed in my bedroom that was only lit by the lamp posts outside my house. The event yesterday still keep replaying in my head.

"If you do love me, you wouldn't have forced me. If you think you love me by doing that, you are wrong."

You...you're doubting my love for you, Seonhee? What did I do to deserve thus from you really?

But even if that was what she said, I'm willing to prove to her that I do love and care for her feelings. Tomorrow is Valentine's day, and that is just a good timing for me and her to talk about all the issues we've been having and really fix them this time. Our relationship cannot go strained like this for long, or we might end up breaking up and getting hurt. I, for my part, won't break up with her, but would she do the same?

I rolled over onto my stomach, reaching out for my phone. When I switched it on, the light blinded me for awhile forcing me to close my eyes.

I went to my text messages and then typed into a new message.

"I love you. So so much...you just don't know."

I tried to put in all my love and feelings for her in that short message, hoping she would feel it too. I clicked on the send button.

I should really catch some sleep already.