JIYONG

I left because I’m hurting.

I cannot believe I called my wife a bad Mother, when all this time, she’s the one holding the whole family together. Not even once did she slack off. She’s always there for all of us no matter how tired she is, she’ll give us time. She fights her own battles and fight ours too.

Five days passed and I’m sick of being alone. I’ve cleared out my mind and was able to get work done outside the studio as well. I cannot believe that out of my intense emotions, my longing for my family, and my disappointment towards Isabella, I was able to write songs fluidly as if words are water flowing.

My decision of staying here at the girls’ old apartment is a good one, for I was reminded of my and Clara’s beginning. This place witnessed so much of us, including Isabella. I love how simple it is here. I miss the noise in our house though, and of course, my kids.

My kids. I’m sure they’re looking high and low for me. I feel so guilty for leaving without a single word after they chased me down the street, six of them, running barefoot while I drive off. It’s like a scene in a movie that I’ll always regret.

“Jiyong” I finally accepted my very first call in days.

Clara called me non-stop the night I left, but stopped the morning after. The kids constantly leave voice messages (most times they’re crying) and text messages asking where I am and if I’m doing well. By day three, I turned off my phone to rest from it all.

“Hey” It’s Youngbae. “Where in hell are you?” he is angry, and he has the right to be.

I sighed, “At the girls’ old apartment” I answered plainly, “I’m here all along”.

He smirked, “Your children have been going to YG every day looking for you. Gabby, DK and Danny are even planning to fly to Jeju to check if you’re there no matter how the caretaker of your beach house tell them you’re not there” he shared.

I wonder where my firstborn is.

“And Isabella?” As disappointed as I am at her, I love that kid. She’s my precious little angel. Yes, her sudden outburst is so crazy, but I get her, she does need her freedom and my being over protective is hindering her from doing whatever she likes.

There was silence for a while. My heart started beating and my nerves are shooting up.

“She moved out of your house just yesterday, Jiyong”

This is a shock. Though I know this will happen, I cannot believe that it happened when I’m not around. I wonder what made Clara approve of it.

“According to Daryl, Isabella feels so guilty that she isn’t comfortable at your home for the moment. So, she decided to borrow Gabby’s apartment. Don’t worry, we checked on her this morning and she’s doing fine. That kid is a brave one. She opened this new chapter of her life without much with her, but a strong will to get out there and explore” he chuckled and I did too. “Living on her own is good for her. She will learn things on her own now and discover herself as well”

That’s correct. As much as I want to keep all my kids with us in one house, I know the time will come where they’ll be flying out of the nest, and it has started. Isabella, as innocent as she is of the real world, can make it through. She’s a responsible adult. She knows what’s right and wrong. She will live.

“And Clara?” I’m really curious as to what my wife is up to these days. I bet she’s working her off in the office, and most likely fighting Max.

Youngbae sighed heavily, “Clara is lost”

My heart started pounding in my throat, “What do you mean by lost?”

This is where my whole body felt cold. I don’t know what’s going on, but I have a strong feeling that it’s not good.

“For days we, including the girls and your children, were locked out of your bedroom by Clara. No one, not even the kids can enter. They only leave her food in front of the door and she rarely gets them. The only time she goes out is in the middle of the night when everybody’s sleeping. We knew of it after checking your CCTV recordings around the house”

No way. That is not how Clara works. We’ve been through hell and back together, we’ve experienced the ugly and the worst, but never has she fallen so bad like this.

“However, the girls were able to get in this morning. I think Clara forgot to lock the door, so they took advantage and checked on her. They saw her in a bad state, Jiyong and when I say bad, I mean bad”

This is my last str