DONGs

Keeping my past to everybody is the heaviest thing I’ve done in my entire life. I’m ashamed and totally disgusted by it that I swore to myself I’ll never tell it to anyone, not even to my husband when he has all the right to know. But now that it’s all out in the open, the torn has been plucked out of my heart already. At last, after years of solely knowing the truth and hiding the darkest part of my life, I’m free of baggage, making me feel light as a feather.

“Who knew this jealousy thing will lead to this?” I ask the girls while waiting for our husbands to finish their recording.

Clara looks at me and smiles. “Sis” she put her hand on my shoulders “It’s really supposed to happen…maybe…God planned this because he knows that the truth will lift off the heaviness you’re feeling for a long time already that he wanted you to be free”

Railey wraps her arms around my waist with a sweet smile. “And now that you’re free…you can already leave it behind you and move on”

“I’ve moved on!” I say and just received stares from them. I sigh heavily. “OK…maybe I still haven’t…but…I swear to God…I don’t think about it as much unlike before…yes…it got a huge impact on me for I wouldn’t be the that I were during my teens and single years...but I’m slowly sweeping it off my system…although I badly wanted to just flush it out in one go”

“You’ll be able to do that now” Clara says and for the very first time, I believed that it’s possible.

To be honest, I feel embarrassed. I actually don’t know how to move around Youngbae starting from this day on with him knowing that I didn’t show him all my cards on the table. I’m afraid that he may feel like I don’t trust him or he realize that he doesn’t know me like he thought he did.

“Finally!” Railey snaps upon seeing the boys walking in Clara’s office.

They look exhausted as usual and even though we’re used to seeing them like this, the girls and I feel new to it.

Youngbae sits beside me on the couch, his arm automatically wrap around my shoulders. From the way he looks, I can tell that he’s all cool with me like he doesn’t care about what he just discovered about me and surprisingly, I don’t feel awkward like what I’m expecting.

“Are you done working already?” Jiyong moved the pink chair in front of Clara’s desk to the side for him to see us.

“Railey and I are…I’m just not sure about your wife” I look at Clara who smirked upon hearing me.

This woman is working her out like a machine! She didn’t even stop during breaks and knowing her, whenever she’s like this, it just means that she’s bothered by something and doesn’t want to think about it.

“Aigoo” Youngbae removes his arm on my shoulder and rests his head on it instead. “This will take long for sure”

It made me chuckle. They are so used to this already, that even though he hates staying in our office for a long time (he’s really not an office kind of person, it bores him), he still waits and just sleeps or goes back to their recording studio, a place where he really belongs.

“I’m gonna be done soon” I don’t know if it’s just me or Clara is really not in her element. It started after we patched up with our husbands and goes on until now.

Railey turns to my direction from the other chair about a meter away. “What’s wrong with her?” she mouths while TOP is looking at her.

I shrug. “Don’t know”

The clock ticked fast for an hour passed with me feeling like it’s only been a minute.

Tired and itching to go home, “Sis!” I called, making her drop the draft article she’s reading. “Aren’t we going home yet? We’re going to grow roots like a tree now for waiting so long”

Railey laughed and nods in agreement. “It’s been an hour and it’s late! Can’t you leave those for the night? After all…in…” she looks at her watch and started counting in a whisper “In seven hours you’ll be back here again”

In all fairness to Clara, she’s not as workaholic like she used to anymore. The wind must’ve changed direction for she turned back to being one today.

“I’m sorry guys” she’s already beat that her voice doesn’t sound healthy anymore.

Jiyong is just staring at her as if he’s thinking what I’m thinking also. If there’s one person aside from Railey and I who can read Clara perfectly without fail, it’s him, so I’m sure he can also feel that something is wrong.