My Thoughts
Je l'aimais
Tiffany POV
"Hello? Yuri?" I looked at my phone to realize that she intentionally hanged up on me.
I gently placed my phone on the desk that rested next to my seat as I looked out the majestic buildings of Los Angeles through the glass window of my parents' mansion.
"I did what was best for her, right?" I cupped my face with my palms as I tried to hold back my tears.
Fragments of my memories with Taeyeon and my current argument with Yuri... I convinced myself that I have to clear my thoughts for a while. Although Taeyeon and I are not together, I was still unfaithful to Yuri by thinking about Taeyeon all day, everyday.
Yuri means so much and I know that the mature thing to do right now is to confirm my feelings for both of them and go with whatever happens next.
I just wish I could've told Yuri truthfully why I didn't want to go back to Seoul. She was right when she called me selfish. I held my pride tighter than the person I loved and let her leave me alone without having the guts to stop her.
My life in Los Angeles for the past three months has been perfect, despite of my family issues with my stupid uncle, is because I was far, far away from the person who made me doubt my love for Yuri... the one and only dorky Taeyeon.
I was with the person I knew I was suppose to be with, my family, and of course being surrounded by my childhood place. The thing is... I got too comfortable that I feared going back to my real home with my other family. I didn't want to confuse myself with indefinite feelings for Taeyeon that's why I refused to go back to Seoul with Yuri.
I love Yuri... I love her so much. But these feelings I have for Taeyeon, I certainly cannot deny. If I go back to Seoul, I'll certainly like her again. I'd rather miss Yuri rather than being with her and having feelings for someone else. That's why I refused to go with Yuri and I didn't stop her from leaving not because I didn't love her or wanted her with me but because I respected her decision and I knew that she would be happy that way. It's funny, I was willing to leave SNSD just because I wanted to be far away from Taeyeon as possible
"Tiffany, darling!" I snapped out of my thoughts as I heard my dad yelling my from the other room.
"Yes, daddy?" I shouted back.
He entered my room wearing his suit as always and noticed my sad expression.
"Darling, what's wrong?"
I faked a smirk and stared back at the window with a slouched back.
"Did something happen between you and Yuri?" He sat beside me and placed my head on his shoulder.
"I broke up with her." I started to cry.
"How did she take it?" He asked calmly.
"Well... She hanged up on me." I looked over at the phone.
He sighed deeply. He knew that even though he was my father, he didn't want to nose into my love life.
"Sweetheart, look at me."
I quickly obeyed him with puffy eyes. He immediately wiped my tears with his thumb and gave me an encouraging smile.
"You are Hwang Miyoung... brave, confident, and strong. You are capable of anything."
That was his line that he often repeated when I was upset or disappointed since I was a child.
I started to laugh a bit.
"Did you call me 'cause the press is here?" I maturely asked.
He slightly looked embarrassed.
"Yes, sweetie. So you better get out there. They need your thoughts about if you are taking your uncle's place in the family company." He stood up from the seat and fixed his tie.
"Darling, I'd offer the position to you if it weren't for your singing career." He added.
I stood up as well a few moments later, not responding to his statement.
"Let's get this over with." I picked my big, black shades and I went ahead of him.
I opened the huge doors and proceeded to my parents' meeting room where I was greeted with flashing lights from DSLR cameras. Good thing I was wearing the shades that I brought or else I could've gone completely blind.
There I was going with this useless interview as I thought nothing but Yuri... And Taeyeon.
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