Chapter 35. Realizations

A minute later, Seoyun walked back into the café still weirded out by the feeling she had when he walked away. Her unnie welcomed her with a big smile after lifting her gaze from the stroller.

“I’m dying for her to wake up,” Yuri screeched softly with her fingers opening and closing as if too ready to pounce on the little girl.

Seohyun laughed then grumbled, “Do not. She hates it when she’s forced to wake up. This baby is definitely temperamental.”

“And where did she get that?” Yuri laughed eyeing her younger friend meaningfully.

“I’m so sure it’s from that man,” she mumbled to herself but her unnie heard that and laughed because she was actually pinning it on her. Shaking her head, she decided to turn the conversation around and sighed loudly, “It’s been a long time…”

“I know…” Yuri reached out and squeezed her hand tight, “But Seohyunie, I can’t believe you’d be married now.”

So much for her trying to change the topic, Seohyun her lips and her smile was forced as she shook her head, “I am not.” Her unnie gave her a questioning look without really asking. She knew from the very beginning that she couldn’t lie to that person she treated like her sister. Although she was finding it hard to explain her situation, she just jumped into it, “H-he found me when I was about to give birth and he helped me… and never stopped.”

Yuri’s brows pulled together taking in the meaning of her words until a small part of it became clearer. She asked again trying to coax her into telling everything, “So he’s not Euna’s father?”

He might as well be but Seohyun shook her head with a sad smile because it poked a small hole in her heart. Just the simple way she or he would regard him as Euna’s appa brought this unbelievable feeling of certainty in it but the opposite definitely gave off the equal opposite feeling. “But on the legal papers he is,” Seohyun found herself adding as if she was trying to convince herself not Yuri.

“Who is the father then?”

The question squeezed her heart and her eyes landed on Euna’s sleeping form as she shook her head. It was a straightforward question that she could not escape from and she already anticipated that from her unnie. She looked back at her and sighed, “I’d rather not talk about that. At least not right now… I’m sorry…”

She nodded understanding that this could be something very delicate. Also, knowing Seohyun, nothing she could say would convince her to tell her the truth so she just nodded, “What did your parents say about this?”

“They don’t know…”

Now Yuri looked worried, “What do you mean they don’t know?”

She shrugged seeing that sudden concern in her unnie’s eyes and she understood it too well, “I left Tokyo without knowing I was pregnant.”

Yuri frowned. The Seohyun she knew was intelligent and cautious so she was rarely impulsive. Her getting pregnant definitely raised questions in her mind. But since the younger woman didn’t want to talk about it yet she decided to ask instead, “Seohyuna, why did you leave Tokyo?”

“To look for you and halmeoni,” Seohyun simply replied recognizing the way her unnie was studying her and especially her line of questioning.

“Oh, god…” Yuri groaned in response, “Please don’t tell me this is about that again.”

She frowned back at her unnie’s obvious frustration and she tried to make her defense. She had this very conversation with her brother but at least she was doing something to rectify what happened in the past that changed their lives, “Unnie, it was my fault why they sent you back. And you and oppa—”

Yuri pinched her eyes tight, “Seohyun, your oppa and I…” she took a big breath and exhaled showing how disgruntled she was by what she was hearing and so she argued, “It was our decision, okay? It was nobody’s fault.”

“That’s what he said… but,” Seohyun swallowed almost trying to empty her heart with the guilt. “I cannot get past that. I guess I was never good at this playing rebellious to my parents. The first time I did it, appa sent you and halmeoni back here. The second time…”

Yuri watched as the woman she loved like a real sister had those eyes full of bittersweet emotions as she looked at her sleeping baby. If this little angel sleeping so soundly unaware of the chaos her umma’s life had been the other mistake she made, Yuri knew that this would be the hardest one to contemplate on.

She clicked her tongue just to make Seohyun stop having those useless thoughts towards her innocent child. Yuri decided to give her a reason to feel a little better so she revealed, “Although it’s true that we were sent back here but you know it was time for halmeoni to retire and rest. If I’d known any better, she was relieved to go back. You know how your father is. And… your brother and I… I knew from the very beginning it was going nowhere but I risked it because I was happy— he made me happy. In that space and time, I was happy so I didn’t think about where we would be. My relationship with him was beautiful and I carry it in my heart but, Seohyun, we were never meant to stay together forever.”

“You cannot say that, unnie!”

“Oh Seohyun, you are very very romantic…” Yuri found herself laughing, “Believe me, there are just some things that we cannot really change or even have it the way we want.”

They were quiet for a moment, Seohyun was pondering over what she said until Yuri cleared .

“Do you really think your oppa won’t find me if he really wanted to?” She didn’t want to say that but that was the only thing that kept her believing that they were never going to happen ever again. Yuri knew and accepted that she lost him through that. The mere thought. Her smile was almost sad but she managed to shrug as if it was not a big deal, “Yonghwa found me so easily…”

“Unnie, Oppa loves you,” she knew that because she could feel that when she talked to him about her unnie. Her oppa never admitted that he didn’t love Yuri anymore. He just dismissed her saying that she was childish and she only wanted them to get back together out of guilt. Which was true but not entirely. She witnessed the love that they had, so she knew. Even if these two people would be too stubborn to admit it, she knew that they still hoped to be together only that their circumstances were preventing them to— especially their father.

Seohyun closed her eyes. If it turned out to be the saddest story for her brother and her unnie, what could exactly happen to her?

“He moved on. And I do too.”

Yuri distracted her thoughts by saying that but Seohyun could see that it was not true, “He still loves you.”

“If he did, he would have been here now…” she smiled at her persistence.

“Oh, unnie, I’m sorry,” Seohyun spoke under her breath because what she said made sense.

Yuri laughed softly, “Why are you sorry?” She knew why she was sorry, she knew that her words were painfully true. The words that got her going after all these years— believing that he would never look for her made her live through her miseries. If she held on to the thought of him ever coming back to her life, she would have gone crazy by now. Her eyes squinted at Seohyun though, “Did you try to find us because of this? Because if it’s that, it’s pathetic…”

“How can you say it’s pathetic?!” Seohyun cried out, “I-I wanted to know what happened to halmeoni and you of course, you are my family too. Halmeoni was the parent we had when ours were too busy to realize that we existed. And when they did,” she took a deep breath, “They turned our lives upside down.”

“Oh Seohyun, I’m sorry…”

“Now, you’re the one saying sorry,” she frowned for a moment then giggled when her unnie scowled at her.

Yuri looked at Euna. She was probably her best escape from the topic of her and her tragic love story. She decided to ask what was definitely obvious, “Do you really think they don’t know? Your father is not a fool. And your umma would definitely be worried for you.”

“I know. I think, by this time, they know.” She took a heavy breath because at the back of her mind she was worried about her father’s silence. There was no way he wouldn’t know that sh