Chapter 13. If It's The Last Time

The next day Seohyun was anxious for him to arrive. Although Yonghwa didn’t really say he would be back but somehow she knew he would. Thankfully or not, Euna took most of her attention for the rest of the day. She was crying for the most part almost like she was being starved to death, which was partially true since she didn’t seem to have enough supply.

His parents and Aunt Hyeon Ji came by noon and brought her lunch. The couple left after eating with her and his aunt remained for a few hours looking after Euna while she slept. By late afternoon, Seohyun was already convincing herself that he was no longer coming. It was almost nightfall when the door suddenly opened and Yonghwa peeked in for a second before coming in. She gave him a small smile despite the truth that she seemed relieved to see him.

“You’re usually sleeping when I arrive so I didn’t knock,” he spoke as he watched Euna in her crib. Their little baby was wide awake but by some miracle, she was not crying— only her limbs kicking and stretching, her eyes constantly shifting, and her little mouth moving as if she was saying something.  All day at the office, he couldn’t stop thinking about this teeny tiny person.

And, of course, the mother.

Their easy teasing the other night brought Yonghwa a whole new perspective about this woman he just met. Maybe it could work. Maybe they could make it work. A smile formed on his lips when the little girl’s eyes moved towards him. He knew she could not really see him clearly. He knew too that she was probably not even looking at him but that did not matter anymore. Yonghwa leaned closer, grasped her covered fist and gave it a soft jiggle. Euna opened her lips in and O and shifted her gaze away from him. He grinned, so much for catching this little girl’s attention.

Seohyun watched him from the corner of the bed where she was sitting and folding baby clothes. The small smile playing on his lips was enough to make her heart pirouette in her chest. It was no surprise that Euna could really cause that kind of reaction from people but seeing that in him was all too different for her. Whether he realized it or not, Seohyun could feel that he had already developed this sense of attachment to her baby.

And it wasn’t a very good news.

Especially since she finally decided.

“Can we talk?” Seohyun started when she noticed that he was still in that Euna-induced trance.

His eyes lifted to where she was and nodded. Moving closer, Yonghwa positioned himself across her on the other end of the bed, “What is it?”

“Your parents were here this morning with Aunt Hyeon Ji. Your sisters-in-law came by the other day too,” she swallowed the discomfort she was starting to feel then shook her head, “I don't think I still can do it— the plan, I mean.”

Yonghwa frowned. He loved those women like his real, flesh and blood sisters. He couldn’t imagine what they could have done to upset Seohyun so he asked, “Did they say something—”

“No, no, not like that,” she tried to smile while grabbing another onesie and folding it neatly. She focused her attention on her small task since she could not really look him in the eye. “They were so lovely and so nice to me and Euna. Your sisters-in-law brought a paper bag full of baby clothes that could last Euna a year,” Seohyun almost laugh but she couldn’t. She sighed as she continued, “And your parents— especially them, I just don't want to lie to them anymore. You have a beautiful family.”

His eyes never left her. It didn’t escape to him that she was trying to avoid his gaze but the smile she was wearing was sad— regretful. Regretful for not going through with the lie. He shook off this unknown emotion that had suddenly taken permanent residence in his chest whenever he looked at her. This just prove to him that she was not really the kind of person he thought she was. She was not really after anything more than a little comfort she could give her little one. Like him, Seohyun was just forced to agree from the beginning because she needed some kind of security for Euna. But somehow, this crossed his mind that she would back out. He didn’t really know how to feel about this. “If we tell them the truth, Aunt Hyeon Ji and I will be in big trouble,” Yonghwa replied almost to himself.

“Aren't you shocked or something?” Finally, she found herself eyeing him curiously.

“Actually, I was expecting it already,” Yonghwa replied almost thoughtfully then tipped his head at her, “Now you gain my trust.”

Seohyun laughed, “Oh really? Now I gained the king's trust! Is it a good news, your highness?”

The way her eyes danced with amusement made him want to convince her that she was making a mistake. But it would be selfish of him— Yonghwa dropped his gaze on his lap then shifted his attention towards the crib.

Selfish? Like he really wanted to keep them for himself?

He winced. There was no longer any movement from the crib. Euna must have fallen asleep. He swallowed the uncomfortable feeling biting back at him instead he spoke softly, “Yeah it is.” It sounded like a lie. Ignoring his own thoughts, he looked back at her with a smile, “Will you two be okay?”

“Of course, we will be. I’m actually excited taking her home,” Seohyun could feel the ball in when she said that. She was not very comfortable with that decision but she probably wouldn’t be able to live with her conscience bugging her all the time. But then again, it was a shame that they were able to develop this rapport that they could even tease each other. When she looked at him, she noticed his faraway look and the need to know what was in his mind that moment made her ask almost shamelessly, “What are you thinking?”

Could he tell her that he was somewhat regretful? Yonghwa shook his head, of course he shouldn’t! He instead chose to reply what was most obvious, “I still can’t come up with a reason. Or should I just tell them the truth?”

“I have been thinking about that too and it would really put your aunt in a bad light if you do. And she has been so wonderful to me and Euna. I don’t want to hurt her,” Seohyun took a deep breath before continuing, “Why don’t you just tell them that I told you the truth that Euna isn’t really yours and there’s no point for us to be with you. Maybe tell them too that I’m going back to my family.”

“Are you really sure about this?” He finally asked knowing for certain that she wouldn’t take back her words. She looked determined to him but her eyes were sad.

“Yeah, it’s the best thing to do,” Seohyun nodded, “Besides, I don’t want Euna to grow up with lies. And we don’t really know each other for us to get into that situation.”

“You’re right,” Yonghwa finally stood and positioned himself in front of the crib, his back on her. The baby really did fall asleep. She looked so peaceful. He smiled; Euna didn’t look like the crybaby she really is. There was this tug in his heart— he was already missing this little girl. Closing his eyes for a moment, he convinced himself that this was for the best. Yonghwa turned away from the baby before he could think of ways to convince her mother to stay. Then, he turned to Seohyun again, “By the way, I met your doctor on the way and informed me your both good to go tomorrow.”

“I know…” she nodded as she stood.

He watched her take the folded clothes to the changing table. Seohyun moved effortlessly now. She was probably regaining her strength and it should be a good sign that she could look after Euna on her own. It should give him comfort but it didn’t. The next day they would be leaving and he would be back to his old life like the four days did not happen at all.