It's been about a month after the incident. We haven't talked since. I can't bear myself to even look at them perform. My little family and the love of my life were taken away. I can't get them back but it's so hard to forget about them. I want to cheer them on, but it hurts too much at this point in life. 

I cut my hair and died it a deep purple. I love playing with colors but I went for a different approach. One that suited my mood. And deep purple is how I feel. The color of bruises and pain for me. I cut it until it came to chin length. It's more practical that way. As a choreographer it's better to have shorter hair. And I kind of like it. It makes me look more mature than I did before. 

In the month that has passed I've been assigned to a new group for me to train on my own. They've already had extensive training, but this is for their debut. They're going to debut in little over a month and I have to do their choreography. They're YG's new boy group iKON. They're still young, but I like working with them. They already have so much experience from competing against the group now known as 'WINNER'. 

They keep my mind off Yixing and EXO. They're so much to handle. 

"Han Bin! Stop fooling around..." I swear, these children. Sometimes I feel like a mother more than a choreographer. But they're fun to be around. 

"We're never going to get this done today, anyways..." Junhoe complains. I know he doesn't to work much longer than he has to. But s think otherwise. They're always fooling around. 

"Jiwon, get down, please... I do want to go home early today, okay?" I beg of him. 

He listens to me and gets down from the thing he was standing on top of. They get in formation and we start the song once again. It's supposed to be a part of their second release. First they'll do a warm-up single called 'My Type'. Then they'll do 2 more songs and so on. 'My Type' is rather slow but is fun to do. Right now we're working on an uptempo song.  They're always so full of energy. 

After we're done for the day we go walk out of the practice area. It's the same one Big Bang uses from time to time. They're ready to end promotions so that's why I got this job in the end. I like it very much. They listen to the things I tell them to do and it's refreshing. 

"Wanna grab some dinner?" Chanwoo asks the group, including me. 

"I don't know. I have to get up pretty early to haul your asses out of your beds..." I start saying but they all start laughing. 

"Come on!" Jinhwan pushes on.

"Okay, let's go... What do you guys want?" I give in.

"PIZZA!" they yell in unison and I just laugh.

"Let's go then!"

They all follow me out to one of the best places I know. Big Bang always took us here when we were promoting. It's so good and not too many people know of it. I like it. 

We sit down and order. It's so tiring trying to keep these guys in check so I don't even try anymore. I don't care how people see them. They're like my own little children. I look at the scene in front of me. They're finally quiet while they're eating. It's the only time they're not jumping around.  

"I have to go, guys.." I tell them as I get up from my seat. 

"We'll walk you home", Junhoe suggests. 

"You don't have to... It's quite far from here", I smile at them.

I still haven't moved out from my crappy apartment. I don't make that much money. And my paycheck from last month hasn't come in yet. I don't want these guys to see where I live. They deserve more than a choreographer who can't even manage a good place. 

"I'll come anyway. I'll drive", he smiles at me as he grabs my hand and drags me to his car. 

"You really don't have to..." I try to wiggle out of his grip. 

"It's nothing, really. I can't have a girl go home alone in the middle of the night. I'm sure the rest of the group thinks the same", he nods for me to get in the car. 

I give him directions as he drives me home. I'm so embarrassed. I don't want him to see this. But knowing him he'll wait until I'm through my door. So I can't send him to somewhere else.

"Wow, this is a bad neighborhood", he looks outside to the trash lying on the ground. "Is this where you live?"

I blush and look at my hands. "I don't make that much money, yet..." 

"Gosh, I'll talk to the manager..." he promises me. 

"Don't. I don't want to me dependent on some company again. I want to do this on my own", I look up and a lone tear rolls down my face again. 

"You really are a broken girl, huh?" he sighs. "I know about the whole ordeal with EXO. And your relationship with Lay." 

"I guess everyone does by now. I just wish they'd forget about it..." 

"Why? Wasn't it worth it all?" 

"Yes", I say without thinking. It really was worth all of the pain. Just being able to think back to all of those things we did together. The lovely times we had. The way he kissed me, loved me. It's something etched into my heart for ever and ever. 

"Then you have to get on with your life", Junhoe smiles at me and I smile back.

"Thanks for dropping me off. Be sure to get home safe. Text me when you and the guys get home. Tomorrow we practice at 9 okay?" I lecture him. 

"Yes, sir!" he salutes me and I get out. 

With one last wave he's off. I walk up to my door and open it. It looks so much better now than it ever did before. I brought some color into it and cleaned it up. I filled up the holes, with some help from Taeyang, who is surprisingly good at such things. I'm not even afraid to shower here anymore now. I drop my things on the table and get out of my sweaty clothes. I need to take a shower. 

After a hot shower I get out and put on some sweats and a shirt. I turn on the TV and switch to some channel. As I'm switching I see EXO. And something really catches my eye. Yixing is wearing my snapback. Tears fill my eyes and I watch him perform with it. I don't know how to feel. Has he still not forgotten about me? 

I watch the entire show. It's the first time I've seen them anywhere since that last time a month ago. Then the interviews come. I'm not ready for this. I'm torturing myself with this. I know I am, but I have to see it. They're all as amazing as ever. So cute and funny. I'm happy to see they're finally doing their promotions. Yixing seems kind of down. 

"Well, Lay. How have you been?" the woman asks him. 

"Lots of ups and downs..." he smiles at her, but I can tell it's a forced one. 

"Fans have been worrying about you, I hope you're well?" 

"I will be", he smiles once again and it breaks my heart. 

"Let me ask, you've been wearing that snapback all the time lately! Where did you get it?" she asks and my heart stops. 

"Someone very special to me gave it to me. I don't see this person anymore now, but I want them to know they're special to me by wearing this", this time I see the ghost of what was us in his eyes.

"Is this the person who was with you for a long time? The one who suddenly went away?" she asks and she's cut off.

It's a live thing so everyone is kind of confused as to why she was cut off. EXO leaves with a polite smile and commercials start. I sit back into my couch and think about what the hell just happened. 

Yixing's POV

I tell about her on TV. Making sure not to mention it's a girl. But she's on to me. The interview gets cut off by SM and we're lead away from her. We smile at the crowd and wave. I know I did something I shouldn't have. But I can't help myself when it comes to Ella. I've been trying to pinpoint her for the last month. But no one is telling me anything. Not even Big Bang wants to cooperate. I'm kind of mad at them for ignoring my requests. I just want to talk to her. After the way she walked away from me, she's all that's been going through my mind. 

Day and night I think of her. She's always there, looking at me in some kind of way. I even wake up sometimes thinking she's in my arms. I even moved to her room in the dorms to be surrounded by her little things she left behind. Her snapback is always with me. Even the shirt she always sleeps in, which she borrowed from me, is always with me. It has lost her scent by now but it's okay. Just having something that was once her is enough for me. 

"You're Lay right?" some guy asks me as we get back to the changing rooms. 

"Yeah, you are?" I ask, trying to be polite. 

"I'm Junhoe from the new group called iKON", he smiles at me. 

"Oh! You're debuting soon, right?" they seem like fun. 

"Yeah, but that's not why we're here..."

"We?" I ask. 

"Yeah, we." The rest of the group comes out from the back and they stare at me. 

"Hi, guys?" 

"We need to talk about something", Yunhyeong tells me. I now remember their names from TV. 

"And that is?" 

"Ella." 

"Do you know where she is?" I ask, frantically. 

"She's our choreographer... Of course we do..." Bobby says as he waves his hands. 

"She is? I knew she would go places..." I mumble to myself as I imagine her teaching these boys. 

"She's a mess." Han Bin tells me. 

"So am I..." 

"We have to do something about that, okay?" Donghyuk says as they pull me with them. 

I don't even bother telling the guys. They know I'm always searching. They've already given up on finding her. I will never give up on her, she's the love of my life. But they understand, they always do. I text Chen, saying I'll be home late tonight.

"Your company man", Jinhwan says as we get into the car. 

"I know..." 

"No really, wait until you see where she lives. Junhoe went to drop her off after dinner tonight and was taken aback. She lives in the outskirts man. Really. It's so filthy there. We know they put her there because we talked to the landlord after Junhoe got back. We can't let her live there like that. Junhoe even suggested talking to our manager but she won't budge. She wants to do this herself..." Chanwoo begins. 

"You had dinner with her?" I ask Junhoe with a pinch of jealousy. 

"We all had, dude. I just drove her home because I don't think girls should be wandering the streets alone at night..." he explains to me. 

My heart beats a little slower now as we approach her neighborhood. They weren't kidding. This was a very poor one indeed. Filth everywhere. No one deserves to be here. Ella is having such a hard time. I know. They park the car and we watch her building. It looks like it's going to come down at any second now. 

"That's her place", Han Bin tells me, pointing at the only place that has any light. 

Suddenly she comes out to put out the trash. She comes down and I can't take my eyes of her. Her hair is so short now, but she looks even more beautiful than before. It has this deep shade of purple, the same as Xiumin's. She's lost weight. And she looks like she hasn't been sleeping for the past few weeks. I know exactly how she feels. 

"And?"Bobby asks. 

"And what?" I shoot back. 

"Do you want her back?"