Lies Between the Faded Carved Scars
Requested By: ayumi13
Reviewer: JungAddicted
Review Requested: July 1st, 2015
Review Completed & Posted: July 10th, 2015
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Title (8/10)
The title was quite unique, since I've never seen this title before. It's relevant to the story, and you see that through Minseok's past and the title brings a lot of curiousity to the readers.

Foreword (5/15)

Characters (17/20)
Wasn't clear at the beginning but as the story progressed, they were revealed and well developed. 

Narrative Elements (25/30)

Plot and Theme (34/35)
Overall, you've gotten the point of the story across pretty well. There was plenty of conflict within the story, but it seemed pretty similar throughout the chapters; demons feeding on humans.
The past is a very unexpected internal conflict within the characters, and it's quite sad and emotional (emotion is good ^^)

Entertainment Factors (9/10)
 

Overall Score: (98/120)

 

REVIEWER'S NOTE:

The first chapter was too heavy to read as there were way too many details present on the movement every character made. You could also specify more on who's who, since most of the staff here have no idea on who is the main character (though, confusion about characters may have been the goal)
It could be better; I do think that the  first chapter gave enough of the "mysterious effect" to allure readers towards reading the next chapter. Yet, I would feel more irritated to be honest, since the first chapter was more to confusing which leads to the reader being bored. It can hook them, but might also scare some away with confusion.

The theme is supernatural; which seems to be very common among Exo members, yet this plot seems to be one of a kind or unique; which is a good thing. It isn't played out and overused.
-I really thought that this one is one of a kind plot. though one of our reviewers said that she's seen something like this before but its good (the basic concept). Unique and uncommon on AFF.
--The side stories with the other characters were great. The plot is solid, and makes you think. New and fresh.

The description and the foreword presentation could be better.
[TIP] A description is meant to intrigue the reader, almost like luring it's prey. You shouln't have too much in the description, please remember to save some for the foreword as well. 
A description should just be like a quite passage, nothing to deep into the story.
[TIP] A foreword should be the passage that gives the most information, but sometimes, you can also have on it is as an excerpt; monologue, poem or quote. **Remember, you can also go back and change it later if the story turns out to be different than what you originally planned.

I would like to thank bleached sand on asianfanfics for the guide through out the whole description and foreword.

I must admit, the second chapter got me like asdfghjkl, I didin't think that it would be that interesting, especially the part when Minseok got to kill those demons. He got to say those words, which was pretty hot, to be honest. "For the sin you have caused, harming and murdering other people, I am sentencing you to hell," I was looking for Minseok to say those lines at every chapter, like I would killl something if I couldnt find one.

It got more and more interesting as the chapter go by, the flashback especially. The one on chapter eight got me tearing up, it was too sad :') 

The demons Minseok killed were- feeding on humans? Correct me if I'm wrong, but the demons were human who died; but since their/someone else's emotions were very big, they are able to resurect or something and they feed on humans wether they are aware or not, but the problem is; how is everyone around them not aware that they died; unless Minseok had killed them?
Like, after Minseok had killed them, everyone would start to look for the missing body.

"Will...I always be blamed for things I have not done?" was my favourite quote of the whole eight chapters.

There are some grammatical and typo errors (in one of the chapter; you wrote "someone out THEIR" you couldve used "there" instead, but the mistakes are not that obvious nor disturbing. Didn't take away from the story.

I would really recommend this story.

Reviewer's Song Choice: