Wish No. 13
Requested By: louieleyn1206
Reviewer: -theunniefangirl
Review Requested: July 14th, 2015
Review Completed & Posted: July 22nd, 2015
**Please remember to credit us in your foreword with the banner on the right and comment to let us know you've picked up your review**
I feel so bad because this took so long. I'm sorry but my life got into the way of me reviewing this 3. I promise this won't happen again! I hope this review makes up for a wait.

Title (8/10)
This isn't the most exciting title, but it''s catchy and matches the angsty feel of the story. I also can see how it related to the story as well.

Foreword (10/15)
I'm not really a fan of character charts (is that what they're called lol). I honestly don't really see why it was needed- you could've just said this;

"Bae Suzy was the girl who was forced to grant wishes, and Park Jimyoung was the boy who had 13 of them"

Introducing the characters with images kind of ruined the moments. I personally think that the description and foreword weren't very eyecatching. Try adding some more color into it, and using more eyecatching fonts ^^. 

Characters (10/20)
The characters were pretty good. We got to see the struggles they were going through. But, I did wish there was more character development. Their dialogue seemed kind of rushed and choppy. Maybe it's because it's a oneshot that we couldn't really get the character development I felt was needed. Their romantic feelings came too soon and we weren't really able to see how they developed it.

 The characters are also a bit cliche. Suzy is the depressed ice princess- like character and Jr. is the happy boy she meets. It's pretty taboo how she changed her mind on life all because of him. 

Narrative Elements (20/30)
The persepctive is fine. You didn't randomly change the POV or type of perspective, like a lot of people accidentally do. 

 I personally like that you were able to express Suzy's emotions well, which made the story a more emotional ride. 

 Like I said before, the story was rushed. Try to keep it slow and don't try to rush their feelings or relationship.

Plot and Theme (25/35)
I have seen a lot of stories like this. I wasn't surprised or emotion about the ending just because of how common the ending is.

 The teen lovers meeting in a counceling seesion because they both suffer from something is a very common troop in drama writings. Especially when the girl is a depressed girl who "doesn't believe in love". Then she meets the male protagonist, a happy and mischevous character, who stars doing something with her and they eventually fall in love. Then the girl finds out love is a good thing.

 The ending was super cliche, in my opinion. The male usually dies (why y'all gotta do that to him lol). Him writing her a leter is probably the most unoriginal thing about it. This story, in fact, reminds me A LOT of Fault In Our Stars. If you did base the story on the book, than I think it's best for you to put a disclaimer in the foreword so no John Green fangirl will come up to and bite your because of it.

Entertainment Factors (6/10)
The story was pretty good to read. The only thing that REALLY bothered me was the fact that it was a really cliche story. I expected everything that happened in it. I'm not really a GOT7 or Jr. fan, but I'm a hardcore Say A and Suzy is like my life, so that helped me with my knowledge on it all. In all honesty, I didn't even know Jinzy was a thing (I'm so obviously not a JYP Stan), but you kind of got me shipping them, even if Suzy's dating Lee Minho.

Overall Score (79/120) 

REVIEWER'S NOTE:

I saw nothing wrong with your grammar. I hope this review didn't (it probably did) and once again I'm sorry for the wait