Pedigree of Red, White and Black
Requested by: Betxso
Reviewer: Yoon_Jeonghan
Review Requested: August 13th, 2015
Review Completed & Posted: August 15th, 2015
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Title (10/10)
A weird and creative title, whch leaves the readers wondering what is going to happen in the story. I love it because it sounds dark and peculiar, which is a really good first impression for a story.

Foreword (8/15)
No layout was used, but a layout is not required for a good story. A really short summary was used. It doesn't really evoke many emotions but it does its job by luring the audience to read the story. Short and simple.

Characters (16/20)
Not much character development as the story is more of just describing what happens. The character introduction is simple, but it leaves you imagining and creating your own definition of "beautiful and innocent". 

Narative Elements (26/30)
There were no grammatical mistakes, which I'm really grateful for, and the setting wasn't really described as a whole, however the mood of the story was really dark and I could really feel the twisted darkness of the story, which is what I really liked about it.
Note: You had rather large text for your writing (the foreword size was great, but for the chapter itself, not so much), which makes it look messier. Lower the font maybe one or two points. And, don't space it out as much, since it makes it harder for some to read. It'll look more elegant and attract more readers if it's a smaller text (only slightly) and the paragraphs are less spread out down the page. 

Plot and Theme (25/35)
Jealousy and death was used as a combination in the story, which was a really clever idea as it made the story really weird, peculiar and twisted in everyway. The characters, although not described thoroughly, are pure evil. When Jimin appeared, I really thought he was going to save her, but I was quite surprised to see he was actually a creep, maybe I sort of missed the first sentence in the foreword where it stated that the story was a "twisted fairytale". However there was no originality in the plot, but the author does state in her foreword that she does not own it, but there was a lot of creativity used in the plot. I really liked how the author made described the characters' personality in her own way and how she changed the ending. 

Entertainment Factors (10/10)
Overall, the story was a really good read, however it was kind of short. I apologize for the extremely short review, but I didn't know what else to write as the story was quite short. I really liked the plot of the story and how the author has described the scenes with her own imagination instead of following the normally cliche twisted fairytales. I loved the short phrases highlighted in bold. They were dark and twisted, which helped the story flow a lot.

Overall Score (95/120) 

REVIEWER'S NOTE:
I really enjoyed the oneshot, however it does lack in words, maybe the characters and their encounters should be described more. Yet again, I really apologize for the short review, but I really loved and enjoyed reading the oneshot. It was dark, peculiar, strange and twisted in every way, which is really my favourite type of story to read.

Reviewer's Song Choice: