I heard his heavy panting. I am also hearing basketballs dribbling on the cold floor. For the first time, I felt nervous. I felt something different. Maybe it's because of Norie and Woobin's brilliant words of luring me into the true way. I sneaked and I am seeing a man, I mean I'm seeing Yonghwa who's full of sweat as his hair were messy as hell. 

I'm stuck sneaking at him. 

He stopped, he stopped dribbling. I thought he saw me already, or he doesn't want anybody to see him. He said he will not play again, he said he's not going to hold a basketball. 
He just said it to me the last time I saw him. 
But why is he playing like that?

He dropped the balls and sit on the cold floor. He's pissed and his expression placing some undeniably hurt through his face. He is aching. 

I hate it.
I ing hate it.
Why I always see myself on him? Why do I have to stuck in this kind of dilemma of pinpointing who am I anymore? As if I'm seeing a completely Shinhye on that cold floor.

I really hate it. 

I am standing at the tree, which the leaves are falling like myself now. I'm falling into the confusing thoughts of mine. Norie keep saying I have a beautiful heart, I hate it. 
Woobin said I should make him play and bring him to the training place suited for him. I hated it. 
I hate myself when I saw him aching back then, I hate it because I can't stare long at him, because I might lose myself. 
I might comfort him, like I wanted to comfort myself at times I'm aching and giving up. 

"What are you doing here?" He said. 

I realized that he is standing in front of me. "I-I just came here. You?" 

"Nothing." He said coldly.

Nothing?
So no one knows what he's up been doing on that abandoned court? He is keeping himself there. 

"Where are you going now?" I asked him. 

"I warned you, don't follow me." He said. 

"I won't follow you anymore." I said calmly. "I won't." 

"Good." He continue walking, I didn't where he's gone. I can't even see his back anymore. 

"I won't follow you anymore, Yonghwa." I mumbled. 

***

Yonghwa's counting his steps going back to the abandoned court. He felt sad, it going to autumn again. He'll wait for the whole year again to see the shining summer stars. 

Stars, the only thing making him special as of now. 
Nobody. No one. Nothing else. 

He reached the abandoned court, the place he's staying now. His Dad doesn't checking on him now, but it's okay. Woobin has been a good friend.

And that girl. Shinhye. 
He doesn't know what she does but that embrace.
That embrace wanted him to see her again. But seeing her again will lead to another fall of him.
He can't afford that. 
He can't just fall again. 

He switched the lights on. Surprises amazed him. Completely different. 

"I didn't follow you, I just waited for you to comeback." I smiled at him, he's eyes were shining like summer stars. I did clean the whole place with my own bare hands. I felt I need to do it for him. 

"You are crazy." He said to me. 

"I am." I really do.

"Why are you doing this?" He asked, but the anger on his eyes were gone. I felt happy. "Why did you clean all of this? Are you crazy?" 

"I don't know too, Jung Yonghwa. I don't even know why I'm doing this to you." For the first time since all started. I only can say I don't know. I'm stuck. I'm at the revenge I did. What is happening to me now? I just cleaned the place of him, instead of putting muds and dirt to it. I should do things that will hurt him, not the things that will make his eyes shine like that. 
Screw me. 

He rushed to me, stared at my confused face. I don't know now. His eyes we're completely different. I remembered the summer stars. I remembered that when everybody fails you there were stars above that will never give up. There are stars that will never leave us. 

He begin to caress my face and I shivered. I bit my lip as my eyes were locked on him. His eyes we're playing on my emotions. I can't survive looking at his eyes. 
He caress my face and stop at my lips. His index finger touch my lips. His eyes were still on mine. 
Then suddenly he kissed those lips of mine. 
His lips were sweeter than blueberry cream cheese. I'm not replying on his lips, I'm actually tasting it. He reached for my neck that deepen the kiss much stronger then softer. 

I reached for his back and embraced them, because if not I'm going to fall because my knees doesn't have the energy to make stand anymore. I'm going to fall. 

Then he left my lips but started to trail soft kisses on my chin. I'm really going to fall now. I gripped and reached for my other hand and locked them together at his back. 
He doesn't seem to stop. 
He needs to stop. 
I can't bare with it anymore. He's too soft, too elegant. 

He finally reached my neck, and that made me fall. As if the heavens gave me new life that made me fall on my knees and pray. 
I fall on the floor, cold floor I just mopped. I'm thanking my instinct to clean the whole place but I never expected to lie there for something I didn't imagine. I fell, but doesn't stopped him. 
He sit on the cold floor, as he continue giving me the kisses I wanted. Kisses I longed the time I fell.

That seconds, I miss his kisses already.

He fix my hair and put it at my back. 
Finally.
Finally he let me breath some air, his face were an inch from mine.  

"Thats the or else, from waiting for me," He smiled, and that smile of him gave me the new hope. 

"I thought that's from cleaning this whole place." I pouted. I'm crazy right now, I miss his kisses already. Those soft delicate lips on him on mine. 

"We aren't done yet, I haven't thank you for cleaning my home." He slowly made an entrance for kissing my lips again.

I'm drowned. 
I'm going to fall.