It Hurts, but I can Endure
Still YouJinki was in panic as soon as he saw her crying. “Aigoo~ Yeojin-ah.” He was never used on dealing with girls so he didn't know what to do at that moment. He just wanted her to stop crying, but how? He looked at the door making sure that it was locked. Jinki didn't want to be caught with a girl crying, afraid that they'll think wrongly of him.
He stopped the music, and heard her sobs clearly. She was looking down, her sobs were low toned but he could hear it clearly. Her shoulders were shaking, Jinki was half scared, and half worried.
“Here.” He immediately took out his handkerchief on his pocket and gave it to Yeojin. He was hesitant at first but he thought that it was the best thing to do at that moment. “Come on, please?”
Yeojin took the handkerchief, “I'm sorry.” She said while wiping the tears on her eyes. “I didn't mean to show this side of me to you.” There was rather a bitter laugh that came out her lips.
“It's okay.” Jinki whispered. “I understand. It would be better to just let it all out.” He symphatized.
There was about five minute silent inside the room and Jinki was just silently watching Yeojin calming herself. He knew from that moment that Yeojin was hurting, that she was feeling so much pain but just didn't want to show. It was enough that she cried, she was maybe thinking that they weren't that close for her to open up too much. However, as Jonghyun's close friend, Jinki had this eagerness to help his wife, and be there for her when Jonghyun was the one needed instead.
“I'm not an intruder, Yeojin...” Jinki opened up after the long silence, “I just talk when I know it's deemed necessarry and when I know the others don't know what to do, but I can be a friend.” With those words, Yeojin looked Jinki and for some seconds, Jinki was struck by how reddish her nose was because of crying. She was turning red and her cheeks were blushing. “I can listen to whatever you want to share.”
“He still loves her.” It was the painful truth, and Jinki didn't know how strong Yeojin was to be able to say those words without buckling. “It's obvious by the song he wrote.”
She looked at him and he didn't answer. Jinki didn't want to tell something that could probably add up to how hurt she was at the moment. “Right?” Yeojin asked but he still didn't say anything. “It was well written, as if the song was tackling about how he feels towards her. It was very clear. I didn't even need to doubt.”
“Yeojin-ah...”
“Isn't it right? I may love him so much, but that doesn't mean I'm stupid.” Those words kept on surprising Jinki, but he still listened, “But maybe he was just confused at the moment. Maybe because they haven't had any closure before that's why he was still feeling the pain.” She sighed. “He still loves her, but I want to believe he loves me more.”
“What are your plans?” Jinki asked, to which Yeojin shrugged her shoulders to.
“Wait?” She wiped another tear that was about to fall. “There's nothing I could do but wait, right? Wait until he completely lets her go. Wait until he realizes that whatever that is in the past is already over. He doesn't have her anymore, and both of them should move on.”
“You're not giving up?” Jinki asked. There was a slight smile on his face indicating his appreciation over how strong Yeojin was.
She shook her head, “Not until he's the one to let go. We promised forever during the wedding, and I don't want to be the one breaking it. Jonghyun's under the situation he never expected he would be, if I am to let go, then nobody was strong enough to keep the relationship strong.”
“But what if...”
“He asks me for a seperation?” Yeojin stared for some seconds towards him. Jinki started to be in panic again after seeing that Yeojin was about to cry again, “Aigoo, Yeojin-ah, okay stop thinking about it, I didn't mean to.. oh my, I'm sorry, please don't cry again, Aigoo~ What should I do. No wait, oh my..” He stuttered but was surprised when Yeojin suddenly chuckled.
“I didn't know Lee Jinki would be this cute.” She praised while drying her eyes for the nth time. “I'm sorry, oppa. I'm sorry I made you feel responsible of me. I shouldn't have been like this in front of you.”
Jinki scratched his head in embarrassment. “Well, uh.. it's okay.”
Yeojin stood up, “I should get going. I have disturbed you enough.” She smiled brightly towards Jinki and he stood up as well and nodded.
“You're not disturbing at all, Yeojin-ssi. That's the truth, but if you really need to go, then... See you around.” He smiled.
“Thank you for listening, and for keeping up with me.”
“No problem.”
He didn't walk her outside anymore for Yeojin insisted that he could go alone. Jinki just smiled and just went with her towards the door and watched until she disappeared from the corridor.
Yeojin sighed and touched her chest that was nearest to her heart. She thanked the presence of Jinki, however, she wasn't expecting to hear that composition with him around. She thought that if ever she happened to hear it when she was alone, she would probably cry even harder than she did just a while ago. She sighed and shook her head. “Kim Jonghyun is your husband, Ahn Yeojin. Hold on to that.”
Walking towards the entrance, she was surprised to see Minho coming in. He was surprised as well to see her around the company.
“Yeojin-ah~” He called out and approached her. “Why are you here? Did Jonghyun hyung come back already?”
She shook her head, “I was here for a company. I talked to Jinki oppa just now.” She said, but this time, with a smile.
“For what?” Minho frowned.
“Maybe for the same reason why you're here? Are you going to see him, too?” She asked and he nodded.
“I'm going to ask him to have some drink.” He asked but Yeojin chuckled and shook his head.
“He's busy.” She told him. “I disturbed him about them already, don't do the same thing or it will irritate him. If you want, we can have a drink together.” Yeojin smiled and she looked so friendly. “I'm free.:
Minho was hesitant, “But.. what if Jonghyun comes back? I think he'll be mad to know you're with someone else.”
Yeojin let out another chuckle again. “He's with another girl. We're even.”
“Aigoo...” Minho sighed and thought that she was very cool outside, eventually, he agreed and both of them drove to some place to have a drink together.
*** ***
Yeojin placed her elbows on the table and looked at Minho who was just opposite her. He was starting to drink more. “I thought you wanted the two of them to get back together? Then why are you acting like this? Shouldn't you start celebrating?” She was a bit tipsy as well, for she already had 4 cups of soju.
“Well...” Minho looked at her for some seconds befor breaking up the silence again. “I didn't know it would hurt like this... knowing you gave up your own happiness just for the sake of that person's happiness.” He sighed. “It was not as easy as how I thought it was.”
“Hahahahaha!” Minho was even surprised to hear Yeojin let out a loud chuckle. He never heard her laugh like that before.
“Oh God.. someone's drunk already.”
“Yes.” She nodded. “It's you~” She said cutely and even pointed at him. Minho shook his head and just chuckled. “Why are you laughing at me? Hey. I'm not drunk okay. It's you. Choi Minho it is.”
“You are drunk.” Minho said. “Aigoo~ I should stop drinking. Someone else probably will make a scene later on.”
Yeojin frowned, “Make a scene? Yah.” She said and poured another amount of soju on her cup. “Come on, drink more.”
Minho sat back at his seat and shook his head. Count few minutes, and someone really will make a scene.
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