When was it? I don’t know. But feeling his hands on mine seems like a really familiar thing.

 

            Déjà vu?

 

            He started to produce soft sounds (snores, actually). I still can’t pull my hands off his so I remained there, sitting on the bedside, letting him hold my hands.

 

            I closed my eyes as I tried to rest too.

 

 

 

 

 

             I turned restlessly on the bed, finding a more comfortable spot. I kicked out my leg free from the blanket that covers my body and stretched it.

 

            “Ahh!” someone shouted beside me.

 

            I opened my eyes and found Kyu-hyun holding his left leg, withering in pain. I sat up and stared at him. What just happened?

 

            I kicked out my leg free from the blanket. I kicked him?

 

            “I’m sorry!” I bowed my head low. I kicked him! He’s sick this morning and I kicked him.

 

            “It’s fine.” He managed to say. He ruffled my hair, making it look like a haystack. I laughed, and he laughed with me.

 

            I looked up to him and found him stretching hi arms out, reaching for his lower extremities, massaging his leg. Involuntarily, I started to massage his leg too. His muscle tone isn’t bad, I don’t even think that my simple ‘kick out’ would hurt him seriously, I just feel like massaging it for him.

 

            He pushed my hands away after a while. I tried to look at his face but he turned his back to me. What is wrong with him?

 

            I got out of the bed and searched for the dictionary he threw earlier. I found it near the book shelves.

 

            “Can I look at your photo albums?” I clumsily murmured after failing several times.

 

            He faced me, his face is enlightened now. He nodded as he approached me. He pulled out a photo album and gave it to me. I gladly took it.

 

            I went back to the bed to sit there; he sat beside me too, imitating my moves just perfectly. I pinched him at his arm, he winced but didn’t say anything else. He just smiled.

 

            I started to flip through the pages. Looking intently at each picture presented to me. I can read Hangul now, but I still can’t understand them all.

 

            I slowly read the captions written below each picture, and then I searched for the meaning of it in the dictionary I hold on my other hand.

 

            Debut moments.

 

            I laughed. He looks so innocent and young here. His face isn’t that stressed. He looks like a totally different person. I glanced at him, stared at those eyes which stand out from all of his other facial features. He smiled back at me.

 

            First time with Super Junior.

 

            They’re not complete in this picture, though, but you can feel the tension between them. This newly absorbed Kyu-hyun looks awkwardly to his hyungs while the latter tries to ease his nervousness. Ki-bum is not here too.

 

            April 2007 accident.

 

            Kyu-hyun’s picture shocked me.

 

            He looks so helpless and sick and vulnerable and different. Bruises cover his body and face. He has this machine pumping air to and fro him. I never imagined someone so strong could be like this. People surround him in the picture, all of them wearing that worried look.

 

            I let one of my fingers touch the whole picture. Letting it travel from his close-up shot to the ones showing his full condition. My head dropped lower every second that pass, staring at that picture.

 

            Warm hands cupped my face. It made me stare at those small beautiful eyes. “Are you fine?” he whispered.

 

            I nodded. “Don’t be like that again.” I pointed to the image on display and shook my head.

 

            It kills me. Just imagining these thirteen guys being that way, it kills me inside. Even this evil guy who pissed me off at the beginning, if I’d ever see him like that (please don’t let me see him like that), it’ll break my heart.

 

            I can’t control the sobs now. He pulled me closer to him and leaned my head on his shoulder. “Don’t cry.” He whispered.

 

            I wiped off my tears and moved away from him. He just stared at me. I walked out of the room. What am I doing? I faced him before I closed the door “I’ll cook something.”

 

            I started crying again after I closed the door. I know I’m being too emotional. I really want to stop, but I can’t.

 

            I just can’t.

 

            My legs weaken as I went to the kitchen. I need to hold onto a platform to support my stance. I grabbed some water from the fridge to lessen my sobs. And then I sat on one of the chairs and rested my head on the table.

 

            Why am I so affected? I’ve only been here for less than a week! Why does the thought of them being hurt kills me so much?

 

            I’m about to stand up when Kyu-hyun pulled me out of the dorm. He wore huge sun glasses and a simple jeans and shirt. Me? I wear my old pants, partnered with one of my huge shirt.

 

            “Where are we going?” I asked as we started o head out to the highway. He just pulled me closer.

 

            We rented a taxi and he gave directions to the driver. I just stared out the window, watched places pass by me.

 

            The car stopped in an ice cream shop. He pulled me again and he ordered two gigantic banana splits. I clapped in so much glee.

 

            I started to dig in my dessert and he did the same. Every now and then, he’d wipe some mess around my mouth, and every time he do so, I’ll giggle harmoniously with him.

 

            We took some take outs too. Just in case we’re hungry back at the dorm. I clung unto his arm and started hopping, singing their song Haengbok. (Yes, I already searched and memorized some of their songs.)

 

            When we arrived at the dorm, there is no one home yet. So Kyu-hyun searched for a certain C.D from the pile of stuffs at the sofa, inserted it on the player and we started to watch.

 

            We watched Attack on the Pin-up Boys.

 

            It’s their movie, but Kyu-hyun isn’t in it. I laughed hysterically at some funny scenes while munching on the sweets we bought outside.

 

            We didn’t talk much, firstly, because I can’t speak nor understand Hangul fluently; second, I like the silence that exists between us. It’s like our very own way of communication. One that only the two of us can understand. He moves, I move. He smiles, I smile. There’s something about the way we understand each other. And I like being this way.

 

            Because I’ve never been this happy with someone in silence. Only with him.

 

            I pulled out my dictionary again, flipped over the pages and searched for the word that would describe Kyu-hyun’s position in my life now.

 

            “Chingu.” I called him. He stared at me and smiled. “Chingu.” He repeated.

 

            After watching tons of movies, I went to Kyu-hyun’s-room-which-is-now-my-room and rested. I heard Kyu-hyun followed too, but my eyes are so tired to look back at him and I can’t give him my smile because my jaw is sore from laughing hardly for almost five hours.

 

            I felt his weight on the bed. I sighed.

 

            I’m not mad at him anymore. As a matter of fact, I like him now. He’s the only person who can keep me entertained without even using his voice. He begun to pat my head softly, following a medley only he can hear.

 

            And then he started singing.

 

            “Puff the magic dragon—”

 

            What the—?! I’ve heard this song before! But it’s not Kyu-hyun who sang this to me, right?

 

 

            The voice is the same as the one who sang this two nights ago. It’s softer and calmer than the voice Ki-bum oppa used to sing me to sleep.

 

            If it’s really Kyu-hyun who sang this to me before, then—

 

      

            I turned and looked at him. I forced my eyes to open as wide as they could, and stared at this person beside me.

 

            He stopped singing and he returned my gaze.

 

            “Ki-bum oppa.” I whispered as I touched his face.

 

            His eyes lost its natural shape as it opened widely too, staring at me like I’ve done a terrible mistake. He seems lost in thought for a while, and that made me worry. He managed to take control of his emotions after a some time, because he smiled at me while pulling off my hand from his cheeks.

 

            “Aniyo—” he replied. “It’s Kyu-hyun.”

 

            Busted.

 

~Kyu-hyun’s P.O.V. ~

 

            “Ki-bum oppa.” she whispered as her hand reached for my face, caressing my cheeks.

 

            I froze.

 

~~flashback~~

 

            I quietly entered her room, afraid that I might wake her up. I saw her sleeping uncomfortably on the bed. Though soft snores vibrated through her lips, her restlessness is still obvious.

 

            I started to sing a short lullaby in Hangul. But I quickly stopped when I heard her giggle.

 

            “Are you awake?” I checked her eyes. Closed.

 

            Pabo, Kyu-hyun, she can’t even understand Hangul. Think of an English song, I chanted inside my mind.

 

            “Puff, the magic dragon—” I began. I rested my head on the bedside and stretched my legs on the floor.

 

            I’ve been bad to her, so I guess this is one way of making it up with her. I laughed as I remembered her troubles. Her face while eating the ice cream Ryeo-wook gave her. Her wails, sobs and complaints when she lost her money.

 

            I should be nice to her, after all.

 

            “—in a land called Honah Lee.” I finished. I smiled at my own accomplishment. I grabbed the bottle of wine I’ve been drinking all along, and headed towards the door.

 

            “Sweet dreams.” I whispered before stepping out of my room.

 

            “Ki-bum oppa.” She called.

 

~~end of flashback~~

 

            Her eyes were wondering, looking intensely at my face. I wonder, too, how I look like right now. I suppressed my emotions and hid it in my deepest chamber. I pulled off her hand from my face.

 

            I forced out a smile and said. “Aniyo, it’s Kyu-hyun.”

 

            Her face turned pale white again, her lips started to tremble. I was shocked to see that expression of her in display, even though I’ve seen it a thousand times now. I just can’t get used to it.

 

            She started to say something, but she stutter too much, I can’t understand a thing.

 

            She likes Ki-bum. That’s far too obvious. And she’s trying really hard to keep it as a secret. She doesn’t want to be found out. She just wants to like him silently from the sidelines.

 

            I gave her my irritating smirk. “I won’t tell anyone.”

 

            She gave me a confused look. I shook my head. I grabbed a pen and wrote it down for her. She stared at the piece of paper for a while and then she started flipping through that little book of hers.

 

            After finding out and understanding what I wrote. She smiled at me.

 

            “Chingu.” She called again as her short arms encircle my neck.

 

            I took in her scent and closed my eyes tightly.

 

            Would it be bad if I’d be her angel?

 

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

i tried my best to finish this update even though i should be resting.. i just love my readers..

 

 

here you go guys.. thanks for the inspiration..

 

 

SARANGHAE ♥♥♥

 

 

 

_rhei_07_

1:15am