The same block of students that I’ve been companied with since college started, a couple of transferees here and there and the disappearance of others only means a couple of things. Like the past week, kasama ko nanaman sila but this time, not because of our education but for a party.

     Kung wala lang talaga si Gi sa block ko, hindi talaga ako sasama, I hate the excuse of partying kasi simula ng year.

     I prefer sem enders more kasi may enough reason kami to party pero year starters, edi sana sinabi nalang nila na gusto nila mag-party with the block.

     Required pa daw sumama at kj ang hindi pupunta.

     Thinking about it, dapat pala hindi nalang ako sumama para ma-consider ako na kj, baka mawala pa yung ‘good reputation’ ko dahil dun.

     Less familiarity within people I barely even know.

     Buti na lang at family owned restobar yung location namin tonight, unlike some random bar down at BGC or something where there’s much more people na I don’t even care about.

     Ang point din ni Gi for me to come is that first party nga daw to with our classmates since the pandemic started, sobrang kj nalang daw ng hindi pupunta at ang tagal na din since we last had drinks and sa unit pa niya yun, kami kami lang nina Ning.

     Basta, defensive na kung defensive, I’m an extroverted person pero I kinda hate the idea of going to parties.

     Hopefully tonight that will change, if I like the mood, IF.

     ‘Serious’ Gi called me out. Probably seeing my blank expression after staring at the console of her car for too long. Baka antok lang to, who knows. ‘Dubious’ I corrected her. ‘Kasama mo naman ako masyado ka. Eto ba nagawa sa’yo ng pandemic?’ she added.

     Maybe it is.

     I want to blame covid for me turning into an introvert if that happens pero hindi naman ata yun yung case.

     Maybe I just became a homebody who loved the idea of doing nothing on a Sunday night.

     ‘Baka’

     ‘Ning would’ve shouted kambing like right now’

     We laughed. We could still feel her presence even if she’s not with us. The same girl I thought na would be sobrang masungit and probably a meanie, turns out to be a clingy, softie and madaldal na scorpio.

     ‘Miss mo?’ umiling siya. ‘Weird lang’

     I agree. Parang may kulang sa synergy naming this night because of her absence. Baka online to, matawagan.

     ‘Siya lang wala’ I looked at Gi. A frank look in her face that screams out that she misses our Ning. I think parehas lang naman kami ng itsura, I probably reflect what I’m seeing right now. ‘Bawal magsama eh, akala mo naman’

     ‘May gusto ka isama?’ narinig ko yun. I heard the playfulness within her voice, parang andito bigla si Ning at sinaniban si Gi. Not new at all. Baka nasosobrahan na kami sa isa’t isa at kayang kaya na naming maportray ang isa’t isa without much work. ‘Si Ning syempre, kayo lang naman partners ko’

     ‘Final answer?’ suddenly I feel like I’m being interrogated.

     Sinungitan ko siya ng tingin.

     ‘Why? Who else is there that I’d want to bring with me?’ I want a valid answer from Gi. Sino namang isasama ko? ‘Si Mads’ edi siya na may valid answer.

     I snickered at the thought, me and Gi bringing Ning and Rid into a party hosted by a person they don’t even know the name of.

     Ayoko nga dalhin si Rid dun, baka siya pa pagkaguluhan ng tao at new face siya. I would rather have her to myself - and our friends.

     ‘I caught you didn’t I?’

     ‘You caught nothing’ I defended.

     Parang ang layo naman bigla nung pupuntahan namin, parang nakakaantok din yung kanta bigl-

     ‘Have you caught something?’ her tone was teasing, she had a smile unwavering and an eyebrow higher than the other. Ano bang plano sa’kin ni Giselle ngayong gabi? Parang siya pa ata ang kakatakutan ko and not our block mates.

     ‘Caught what?’

     ‘You’re underlying feelings’

     I froze.

     Like how deer would be if it saw a pair of headlights coming its way.

     Like a kid that was caught stealing candy-

     Like a person who got caught liking someone close to them. Someone they wanted to get closer to them.

     ‘You knew?’ I innocently asked. Not even minding the fact that at some degree, they do know.

     Wala din naman akong balak itago.

     Me myself, it took me some time to face it kasi I was bewildered with the whole thing unfolding in front of me.

     Nagkaron pa nga ng thought sa isip ko na wag nalang i-recognize kahit I was having a clue na on what it was.

     Well, if they know, that means I can finally, freely, talk to them about it.

     ‘Si Ning din. Hindi kami manhid Cat’ Gi looked at me, smiling even wider than before. Not a teasing smile though, more like a delighted one.

     ‘Hindi ka din nag-deny.’ Oh, oo nga.

     Giselle snickered at me. ‘As Ning would say’ she cleared . ‘Huli ka pero di ka kulong’

     ‘Mag-focus ka nga sa pagppark’ I warned her. Baka nalilimutan niya na siya may hawak sa manibela.

     Hindi ko nga rin napansin na nandito na pala kami, akala ko ang layo pa namin.

     Onti palang din yung mga kotse sa parking, seems like until here eh my classmates arrive ‘on-time’.

     ‘Ayoko pa mamatay’

     ‘Are you underestimating me?’ I heard the hurt in her voice, though it was a joke, if I wasn’t close with this stupid woman driving right now, you’d be saying sorry to her because it sounded so genuine.

     ‘I didn’t say that’ I pursed my lips before leaning back to my seat. Waiting for her to pull the hand break up so I can take my seat belt off. I might take a hair tie from her gear shift for myself too. ‘Maaga pa, tinatamad pa ako makipag-mingle’ Gi leaned back as I did. ‘Wanna call Ning?’

     ‘You read my mind’

     Wala pa namang 9pm, hindi pa nag-oon ng ‘do not disturb’ yun para magpaantok with her k-dramas and such.

     I’m sure Ning won’t mind having a call for us with for a whil