One month and two weeks later, I got used to my life living here in England together with my mother in a good apartment. We didn’t live in a beautiful house that Mr. Park gave us instead we decided to stay an apartment which we were currently staying. I got a job to a prestigious hospital as a medical technologist and it was good that I had company who were from Philippines. For one month, it seems that England was my country but sometimes I was homesick and can’t even go back yet. Only Emily knew where I am after she found out from Donghae. I bet T.O.P. decided to tell him and he was smart that Donghae would tell Emily. I pleaded to Emily not to tell anyone even with Erika and Sheryl, where I am right now. Emily always sent me a private message through my Facebook. I didn’t post any updates on my life in Facebook pretending that I no longer using it but I’m still updated with what the lives of my friends were. With the whole one month, I tried to adjust my lifestyle, sleeping routine, and how the country works.

Everyday, I woke up early to prepare for work, helped my mother cooked, then headed to the hospital working for eight-hours, and after that went home to do my laundry. Sometimes, mother would do my laundry when I was at work before she went out to deliver the orders that her friends love her homemade cooking. Honestly, we were living peacefully in England and settled down to move on. At least we were happy because were living together and no one would miss each other.

One day, while I was on my way home, I stopped by at the park, bought an ice cream and sat down on a bench. It was relieving my stress from work then I remembered the moment that we had our last vacation where I left him with no word at all. Every time I remembered that day, it hurts and I usually walked through the roadside going along the crowd. Those were painful memories that I need to erase but it doesn’t even I kept myself busy. And when I got home, the security told me that someone was waiting for me, and my mind was brainstorming whom the person was because no one would visit us. Not even my friends at work would visit me ‘coz they went home right away to do their stuffs too. I slowly walked to the lobby and I saw a person wearing a black coat, sitting. My feeling got strong so I approached the person and then, I was right.

“How did you find me?” I asked.

The person stood up and said. “Through following you.”

I didn’t believe that T.O.P. actually found me after not telling him that we didn’t stay at the house that his father gave us. He looked so happy to see me and not in doubt, he hugged me tight. My hands wrapped his body as I also missed him.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you stayed here?” he asked.

“Just to give a thought of disconnecting my life with your family. I don’t want anyone to know where we are.” I answered.

“But don’t you know that father would still know where you are?”

“I don’t care. At least he knew that I didn’t accept all his terms.” I said.

“Does it mean that you cut-off the agreement that you and my father had?” he asked.

“It’s not that. I just wanted to live my life here peacefully and forget what happened.” I answered.

“Did you move on?” he curiously asked.

At first I was having doubts whether to answer his questions but I don’t need to pretend. “It’s only a month had passed so, NO.”

T.O.P. grinned at me when I gave out my answer and suddenly he stood up. “Won’t you invite me in your place?” he asked.

I chuckled and said “I’m sorry if we talk it here. Come with me.”

We went upstairs to my unit and invited him in. He was surprised to see my place ‘coz it’s not like what I lived in back in Cebu. I told him to suit himself while I was preparing a cup of hot tea.

“Yoochun went back home and once again he was again running our father’s businesses.” T.O.P. said.

When I heard the name I got struck and here it goes again, the feeling of pain suddenly occurred and I totally gave a sigh. I continued making the hot tea and pretended that I didn’t hear what he said about his brother. When I was done making the tea, I served it at the sofa and drank it, bit by bit.

“You don’t want to ask how my brother…”

“Please… I don’t need to hear anything about him.” I interjected.

“Why? He was still part of you.” He said.

“Before. But now, no more.” I said.

T.O.P. drank his tea without any continuation of what he would like to say then mother came home and she was surprised to see T.O.P. around. She was glad and even hugged him.

“I’m so glad that you come to visit us.” Mother said.

“I went to the house that my father gave and I found out that you we’re not living there.” He said.

“So how did you find us?” mother gladly asked like she was so excited to see some familiar places back in our hometown.

“I went to the hospital where Kioko work and I kept on following her… for two weeks.” He answered.

“What?!” I blurted. “You were here for two weeks and didn’t even show yourself right away? Are you spying on us?” I madly asked.

“No, it’s not that. I didn’t show up because I thought that you’d get sad to remember things back. FYI, Yoochun is my brother.” He answered.

“And FYI, your half-brother!”

T.O.P. chuckled when I pointed out some facts and he suddenly talked to mother ignoring me. I was mad but not mad it is, just upset I think, because… because of remembering back those times. Honestly, I really wanted to know what happened to him right after I left him but T.O.P. didn’t say anything about it on how Yoochun handled the situation. It would be wise not to talk about it and just move on with our lives.

“By the way, are you going back to Philippines?” Mother asked.

“Nope. I’m staying here for good.” T.O.P. answered.

“Really? You’re working here?” she asked.

“I guess. I’m here to have a deal with my father’s business and I took the opportunity to handle it just to see you.” T.O.P. looked at me when he meant by the ‘You’ from his sentence.

“Well, if that’s the case good luck T.O.P.” mother said then she added. “Where do you live now?”

I looked at T.O.P. and he was smiling before he answered my mother’s question. “I’m staying in this building too.”

“And that’s stalking!” I exclaimed.

“Nope, it’s not. If I stalk then you wouldn’t figure out who’s been following you.” He said and they chuckled.

Mother was pleased from what she heard and she said that it would be great that I had a friend in this building. I was pretty upset about it ‘coz I don’t want him to stay here for long. I the TV and watched a show while they were happily talking about Cebu. It was my first time to see mother was this kind of talkative and she never let go of the topic about T.O.P. and his brother, which I pretended I didn’t here a thing.

“So, how did Yoochun handled the situation after my daughter left him?” mother asked something sensitive.

T.O.P. didn’t answer right away and I tried to pretend that I don’t care but my ears were wide open and ready to listen what happened. “Yoochun got wild and violent the moment he went back home. He was furious and looking for Kioko for two weeks until he got tired from his restless search. I wanted to tell him but I promised that I wont. Yoochun locked himself for three days until he came out wearing his tuxedo and went back to work.” T.O.P. shared.

“At least he move on with his life.” Mother said.

“I don’t know what changes his mind after locking himself from his room and father was so glad about it. My brother didn’t come home after work instead he just slept in his office.” T.O.P. added.

My eyes wanted to cry but I kept on stopping it just to show them that I wasn’t affected. I pretended to watch the show but in my mind, I am rude to Yoochun. I was puzzled too why Yoochun decided to work under his father company or maybe he just realized that I would no longer come back. Knowing that I can no longer hold up my tears, I stood up and went to the kitchen telling them that I would prepare dinner. As went inside the kitchen, I cried as much as I could of what I heard. After that, I started to cook for dinner.

T.O.P. stayed and joined us for dinner and mother took out the food that she cooked during lunch. She placed it on the table and we were digging ourselves with the food. We still cooked Filipino dishes because it’s still the best. T.O.P. was happily eating with us and I remembered this kind of moment that Yoochun joined us back in our hometown.

Suddenly, I felt nauseated and my head was aching. Mother asked me if I was okay and I nodded. The feeling didn’t surpassed and I tried to act naturally then mother asked me again.

“Are you alright? You look pale Kioko.”

“I am?”

“Did you eat something bad during work?” she asked.

“No.” I answered.

“Do you lower backaches? Headaches?” T.O.P. curiously asked.

I nodded then suddenly, I wanted to vomit so I rushed to the kitchen sink and there I vomited. This wasn’t normal and I was expecting my menstruation last week and I thought it was delayed. I was surprised when I had these symptoms that would likely to tell that…

“I am pregnant.”