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Chapter 74 - Is This the End?

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Days passed and it's already New Year's Eve. Sungmin is feeling unwell. The weather isn't helping either.

He has been lying on his bed, thick blankets were covering his body. Mr. and Mrs. Lee and Sungjin don't know that he's sick. Sungmin pretends he's just feeling lazy to get up. He doesn't want his family to worry about him, especially because the day is a very special day. Just a few hours, a new year will finally start.

New beginning. It's also the day of his birthday.

"Sungmin hyung! You can actually help us here," Sungjin yells from the first floor. Sungmin just tucks his blanket closer to him.

He's not only feeling unwell because of the weather, but also because of the decision that Kyuhyun would make on the same day.

Speaking of Kyuhyun, they haven't spoken since they left Hyukjae's house. When Hyukjae learned that Kyuhyun was Taemin's real brother, he was shocked. Actually, everyone was shocked. Donghae, as Sungmin could see, was feeling betrayed, but after a few explanation, he finally understood. Kyuhyun apologized to Donghae several times too.

After that day, Kyuhyun and Jino tried to bring back the times when they were brothers. Sungmin could tell Kyuhyun was overly happy as he celebrated the festivities with his brother. Today, as Sungmin heard from Donghae, the brothers are currently together in the amusement park.

Sungmin is happy, but he doesn't want to lie that he still feels awkward as he remembers what Jino told him few days back. He is bothered and at the same time, his insecurities are slowly eating him alive.

Although he is sure that nothing has changed with his feelings for Kyuhyun, he is still left unsure about things, especially the part when Jino told him that Kyuhyun was just using him and that he destroys his friendship with Ryeowook.

His mind tells him to stop overthinking, but his heart still does.

"Hyung!"

"Alright," He says thriftily as he sits on the bed. He is still dizzy. "Damn it," he mutters as he stands and prepares to go downstairs. He brings his phone with him, thinking that he would receive a lot of New Year greetings and birthday wishes.

As expected, when he is about to go down the stairs, he receives a call from Donghae. He answers it.

"Hello," he tries to sound okay but he isn't able to, but his voice isn't really cooperating. "Happy new year!"

"Yep! Happy new year, Sungmin!" Donghae greets happily. "And oh! I heard it's your birthday later too? Well then I want to be the first so, happy birthday!"

Sungmin smiles even though Donghae cannot see it. "Thanks."

"You sound like you have a cold. Any problem? Are you sick?" Donghae asks worriedly.

"Yeah, it's a bit cold, but I think it'll be gone soon," Sungmin admits. "Please greet your parents in behalf of me."

"Okay," Donghae says. "They actually want you to be here in Mokpo tomorrow. And I also want you here."

"Donghae," Sungmin awkwardly whispers Donghae's name, then he hears a loud laugh.

"I won't say it's a joke, but don't be bothered," Donghae tells him. "Anyway, if you're sick, I guess I'll hang up now so that you can rest."

Sungmin smiles again. "Alright. Happy new year again!"

Donghae hangs up. Sungmin sighs as he goes down the stairs. Sungjin waits for him downstairs. "Hyung, no message from Kyuhyun hyung yet?"

Sungmin's eyebrows meet. "Why would Kyuhyun message me?"

"Just because-"

Sungmin's phone rings again. It is Hyukjae and he is video calling him. He answers it. "Hello."

"Happy new year!" greets Hyukjae. Taemin is with him.

Taemin also greets him. "Happy new year! And happy birthday!"

"It's his birthday?" Hyukjae gets flustered. "Oh my, I don't know! I am such a failure. Happy birthday!"

"Thanks," Sungmin smiles. Then he asks, "Where's Kyuhyun?" It's the first thing that pops in his mind, so it is too late for him to take it back. "I-I mean... you have been with him for the last three days, right?"

"He said he's going to meet someone," Taemin replies, then he secretly gazes at his stepbrother who gets curious all of a sudden. Hyukjae looks at Taemin asking who that someone is. Taemin just grins. "Anyway, it's a secret that my brother and I only know." Taemin winks at Sungmin who gets startled.

"That sly Kyuhyun is meeting someone and I think he's in love! I want to see that person right away. Maybe it's Ryeowook?" Hyukjae says, still clueless about everything. "He finally returns his feelings."

"A-Ah, I think we should stop interfering with Kyuhyun's... lovelife," Sungmin interjects, kind of awkward. "Anyway, happy new year to you again, Hyukjae. And you too, Jino."

"Thanks, hyung," Taemin nods. "Anyway, I think you need to expect a big surprise on your birthday. Well, it's not a surprise... but still. Enjoy your day!"

"Yah! Why are you speaking like you know everything about Sungmin!?" Hyukjae asks. Taemin just chuckles. "But to be honest, Jino still sounds weird when you hear it."

"Sungmin! Sungjin! Go here now. We're going to start some fireworks!" calls their mother.

"Yep!" Sungmin shouts back. Then Sungmin smiles at Hyukjae. "I'm going to hang up, mom's calling me." He hangs up first. Then he turns to Sungjin. "You, go to mom. I'm staying inside the house."

"Are you sick, hyung? You look sick," Sungjin asks worriedly at his older brother. "I'm going to tell mom and dad that you're-"

"Please Sungjin, it's just a cold. It will be over soon. I'll just wait until twelve midnight then I will go to sleep. Thanks for worrying," Sungmin taps his brother's shoulder and proceeds to the garden where his mother and father are waiting.

His father gives him some fireworks. "I know you like these so, I'll give these to you."

"I will pass, Dad. I am actually not into setting up fireworks now," Sungmin tells his father who is obviously shocked. "Don't be shocked Dad. I am not like last year. I-"

The doorbell rings. Mrs. Lee gets it. "Coming! Oh, Kyuhyun!"

Sungmin's heart skips a beat. Being there means Kyuhyun has already decided. But he likes the fact that finally, he is able to see Kyuhyun. And Taemin is right about it.

Mrs. Lee and Kyuhyun approach the remaining members of the family. Sungmin glances at Kyuhyun who glances back at him, smiling. Sungmin looks away. "Kyuhyun, I thought you're not going."

"I promised last time, so I am here," Kyuhyun bows and gives something to the woman. "I got this especially for you, Mrs. Lee."

Mrs. Lee blushes and gets the gift from Kyuhyun. "How thoughtful of you. You've given us something twice already," she says then turns to Sungmin. "You must also give me gifts, Sungmin."

"Mom!" Sungmin pouts.

Kyuhyun turns to Sungmin's father. "Hello, Mr. Lee. I am giving this to you." He gives the present to the lawyer. The lawyer looks surprised when Kyuhyun gets him a DVD. "I don't know what you like, but these movies would help you ."

"Thanks Kyuhyun," Mr. Lee says. "Anyway, since Sungmin doesn't want to join us for fireworks, I'll just give his share to you."

Kyuhyun nods. "Fine with me."

"Hyung! Is there anything for me?" Sungjin asks.

Kyuhyun gets a paper bag and gives it to Sungjin. "This is for you."

When Sungjin opens it, he gets so excited because he learns that it is a new game console. "Wow, hyung! Thanks!"

"Why don't you give something to me?" Sungmin rants, finally speaking after everything. "You're unfair. It's my birthday."

"Oh, is it?" Kyuhyun asks nonchalantly. Sungmin pouts more. Kyuhyun laughs. "I am joking. I'll just give my gift to you later," He turns to Sungmin's father. "Mr. Lee, can I borrow Sungmin's time later?"

"Kyuhyun?" Sungmin turned to Kyuhyun with questioning eyes.

"Alright then," Sungmin's father nodded. "In the meantime, let's eat." Mr. Lee walks towards the dining room, followed by Mrs. Lee and also Sungjin who is busy reading his gift's description. Kyuhyun puts his hand on his midback and pushes him gently. Sungmin looks at Kyuhyun then the former finds him smiling.

"What?" Sungmin asks. "Why are you smiling?"

"You seem upset. Is it about the gift?" Kyuhyun asks, his hand now on Sungmin's shoulder. "It's just a gift, You'll receive it later."

"It's not about the gift," Sungmin looks away, hoping Kyuhyun won't see him blushing. "And I am not even upset."

Kyuhyun pats his head. "Liar."

"You just showed up," Sungmin finallly confesses. "You didn't even contact me for the last three days. How would I know if you're still dead or alive?"

Kyuhyun laughs. "You're such a worrier."

"I thought you're..." Sungmin's voice gets softer as he continues, "...you're just using me."

Kyuhyun's eyebrows meet. "Using you? Since when did that happen?"

Sungmin sighs. "Never mind." He walks away leavng Kyuhyun. For about half a minute, he follows Sungmin.

***

"Three, two, one! Happy new year!"

Everyone claps and pops their party poopers. Mr. Lee and Mrs. Lee hug each other. Sungmin sighs, Kyuhyun notices it so he grabs Sungmin's wrist and hugs him. Sungmin blushes as he realizes that his parents are there, and Sungjin too - they might misunderstand. But even so, he hugs Kyuhyun back, as tightly as he can.

"Happy new year and happy birthday, Sungmin," Kyuhyun greets. He is the first one who pulls away. Kyuhyun gives Sungmin an assuring smile. Sungmin smiles awkwardly, then he looks at his parents and Sungjin, watching both of them. He feels embarrassed as he looks away.

"There's nothing wrong with us hugging, right?" Kyuhyun asks and it makes Sungmin look at him unbelievably. Sungmin feels that his embarrassment becomes double.

Mr. Lee crosses his arms in front of his chest. "Of course, there is. But then, since it's Sungmin's birthday, I'll allow you."

Kyuhyun bows. "Thanks Mr. Lee."

"T-This is embarrassing," Sungmin comments and goes inside the house.

After a while, others go inside the house as well, joining Sungmin who was alone in the dining table. Kyuhyun sits beside Sungmin, of course, as he holds Sungmin's hand that is on his lap. Sungmin looks at Kyuhyun with a questioning look.

When everyone is already sitting, Kyuhyun speaks. "Thank you again for inviting me here to celebrate new year with you. Actually, I have something to tell you all, and instead of telling Sungmin first, I would like to ask for your permission as well."

"What is it, Kyuhyun?" Mrs. Lee asks Kyuhyun, then she looks at Sungmin who is still staring at Kyuhyun.

"I found the person I've been looking for to complete me. I've been restricting myself because I haven't found my brother yet, but now that I find him, I am not going to stop myself anymore. I also know that you already know that I love Sungmin and I want to be his lover."

Sungmin drops his jaw because Kyuhyun has never been so direct. He can't believe Kyuhyun's telling everyone about how he loves him.

Mrs. Lee sighs. "I knew it would come to this, but I am still shocked," she says as she giggles. "Oh well, Sungmin is the person who can answer it, though, Kyuhyun. I'm okay with you as a person and as a lover to Sungmin, but please consider his feelings too."

"I do," Kyuhyun gives her an assuring smile. "That is why I want him to think about it."

"You know that I would not accept that immediately, right? You've won my trust, Cho Kyuhyun, but I am still considering the fact that you would accept the scholarship before I agree for you to be together," Mr. Lee comments. "I guess, it's what you promised me to do right?"

"Dad! Kyuhyun won't accept the scholarship just because he-"

Kyuhyun cuts in, "This is why, Sir, I am going to Harvard to pursue the law studies. Mr. Lee, I will accept your offer."

"No, Kyuhyun," Sungmin stands and faces Kyuhyun. "Don't... D-Don't do this."

Kyuhyun raises his chin and looks up at Sungmin. "I have decided, Sungmin."

Sungmin shakes his head and runs upstairs to his room. He jumps into the bed, facing down as he tucks his face on the pillow. He feels really betrayed. He thought Kyuhyun wouldn't go because he wouldn't want to leave him, but he's wrong. "What the are you doing, Cho Kyuhyun? Why are you going to leave? Why!?"

He doesn't ask for Kyuhyun to leave just for his father to accept Kyuhyun as Sungmin's lover. He just wants Kyuhyun to be with him - it's enough for him. He wipes his tears that just fall contiuously without warning.

Sungmin's phone rings after a while. Sungmin hesitates to answer, but he still does. He learns that it is Ryeowook who is in the other line.

"Hello, Sungmin. This is me Ryeowook. Happy new year and happy birthday," Ryeowook greets, but his voice is a bit soft. It's as if he just cried. "I'm sorry if I haven't contacted you for a while."

"Happy new year, Ryeowook. And thanks," Sungmin tries to act and talk casually, but his voice is a bit softer than usual.

"I... I am going to study overseas."

Sungmin feels more down than earlier. Kyuhyun is leaving, so is Ryeowook? "W-Why?" It's the only word that he can utter.

"My mother had applied for an scholarship in Harvard. I actually took the test during or last day of exam. I didn't tell you because I thought I would not pass, but I did," Ryeowook explains. "You know  that it has been my dream since I went to high school, right? Although I don't want to leave you guys... I... I thought it would be alright. Please... please take care of Kyuhyun for me."

"H-He's... going to Harvard as well," Sungmin tells Ryeowook who is speechless. "He accepted a scholarship that my father gave him."

"R-Really? Then that's good! I'll be able to be with him! Maybe in the university, I would be able to win his heart! Wow!" Ryeowook suddenly becomes happy. Sungmin sighs and Ryeowook hears it. "Why, aren't you happy that we're going to study together?"

"O-Of course, I am," Sungmin lies. Now that he learns that Ryeowook is also going to the sae university as Kyuhyun, he feels more insecure. Why am I even this stupid?

"Although I am happy, I will still miss you and Donghae, and the others," Ryeowook says. "I hope you're enjoying your day well. I'm going to hang up. I have to wake up early tomorrow because I will go back to Seoul. Bye and see you!"

Ryeowook hangs up. Sungmin's tears fall again as he lies back to his bed.

***

Sungmin fell asleep while crying. He then wakes up the next morning.

He can't believe Kyuhyun didn't even go upstairs to explain to him. He could have explained to him better.

His body is still heavy. He still feels really sick and he knows it's twice as much as yesterday. He can't even stand because he is feeling dizzy. But he still manages to sit on his bed.

His phone rings and it shows Kyuhyun's name. He snorts. "I still hate you." But he answers it anyway. "Hello?"

"Are you feeling well now?" Kyuhyun asks. "I heard from Sungjin that you were sick yesterday so... I didn't go up to disturb you."

"I am okay now," he lies. "You can hang up now. I-"

"I know you're upset about my decision but I love you and I want to be a better man for you," Kyuhyun explains. "I accepted the offer because I wanted your dad to accept my feelings for you. If I don't go to Harvard, I would miss an opportunity to become your boyfriend."

"Exactly. You're doing it just because you love me not because you want it. I don't need you to go that extent just to become my lover," Sungmin says. "If you want to really go to Harvard to become a lawyer then do so. I am not that important to hold you back."

"S-Sungmin," Kyuhyun murmurs his name.

"Oh, and yes. Ryeowook is going to study there as well. It would be an advantage for me, because you'll get closer by then. I would not have a problem to pair you together." He hangs up. He turns his phone off just in case Kyuhyun would call again.

Sungmin gets his coat and leaves the house. He needs to wind up and breathe some air to calm himself even if he feels really sick.

***

Sungmin strolls at the city square, particularly doing nothing. He feels more feverish compared to this morning but he decides to continue.

"Sungmin!" Someone calls him so he turns around.

"Ryeowook!" Sungmin smiles and meets the running Ryeowook half-way. "You're already home! Why are you here?"

"Yes! I need to go to the embassy to fix my papers. The deadline is today so I need to go back here and submit my papers," Ryeowook explains. "I called Kyuhyun then told him that I learned from you that he would be enrolling at Harvard too so I told him to go to the embassy with me. He said he'd meet me here."

Sungmin just mouths an 'oh' sound. "I'll go then."

"You're not going to wait for him?" Ryeowook asks. "Any minute, he's here now."

"I am still going to look for new accessories," Sungmin lies once again. "I'll be going-"

Sungmin is about to go but he sees Kyuhyun walking towards them. He stops as he looks at Kyuhyun walking towards them. Ryeowook sees Kyuhyun and grins. "Kyuhyun!"

Kyuhyun has his eyes fixed on Sungmin as he walks near.

"You're here!" Ryeowook excitedly says. Then he turns to Sungmin. "Since you're here, do you want to go with us? I will treat you something because I am already starving."

"No, it's okay. Just go together. I need to go to the..." Sungmin walks far from both of them but he suddenly loses his balance so he falls on the ground.

"Sungmin!" Ryeowook screams as he and Kyuhyun attend to him. "W-what happened?" Ryeowook assists him to stand up so does Kyuhyun.

Sungmin smiles weakly and faces Ryeowook. "I am fine. I-I..." he falls again, this time he loses his consciousness.

"Kyuhyun! What should we do? We need to call the am-"

Before Ryeowook could finish his sentence, Kyuhyun has already lifted Sungmin. "I will take him to the hospital."

"We can just call the ambulance! You need to go to the embassy this morning to-"

"Sungmin is far more important than that!" Kyuhyun angrily yells. Ryeowook gets shocked because he has never seen Kyuhyun that angry. His eyes are flaming then when he looks at Sungmin, the expression changes from anger to care. He then runs away while lifting Sungmin.

"Kyuhyun!" Ryeowook tries to follow but Kyuhyun is extra faster. He stops, and just stares at Kyuhyun's back until he disappears completely. His heart just beats abnormally has he remembers the expression that Kyuhyun had in his eyes. "W-Why... why am I feeling nervous?"

***

Sungmin wakes up lying in a hospital bed. He blinks as he tries to get up, but he feels that someone is holding his hand. "K-Kyuhyun."

Kyuhyun moves and wakes up. He sits straight and looks at Sungmin. "Are you feeling well now?"

"What time is it... What!? It's already four in the afternoon?" Sungmin sits on the bed. "Why didn't you..."

"I won't leave you until I am sure you're already feeling well," Kyuhyun answers as he tightens his grasp with Sungmin's hand. Sungmin blushes as he tries to remove Kyuhyun's hand but he doesn't move.

"But... your Harvard application-"

"I called the embassy and told them that I had an emergency so they would let me pass it tomorrow," Kyuhyun smiles. "You're actually letting me?"

Sungmin looks away. "No. I just asked." SIlence. When Sungmin realizes that Kyuhyun is never letting go of this hand, he says, "You can leave me now."

In Sungmin's shock, Kyuhyun stands, leans on the bed and kisses him. "You made me worried," he whispers as he ends the kiss. "I told you to stop making me worried."

Sungmin, as always, feels giddy with those words of Kyuhyun.

***

"You know, son, I am so convinced that you have changed," Mr. Lee says. "Is it because of Kyuhyun?"

Kyuhyun has already left. When Sungmin's parents and Sungjin arrive, he was asked to take a rest. At first, he insisted to stay but when Sungmin asked him to take a rest, he obeyed.

"No!" He becomes so defensive, but he tries to be casual. "I-I mean... I think it's my own doing. Kyuhyun's a friend so..."

"Well, I know he has confessed to you, and you kissed-"

"What!?" Mr. Lee exclaims. "That Kyuhyun-"

"Ya! Sungjin!" Sungmin almost jumps to cover his younger brother's mouth. "You blabber mouth! Who even told-"

"Dad, it's normal," Mrs. Lee says. "Sungmin, you're old enough."

"Hyung!" Sungjin tries to break free and he successfully does then he faces his hyung. "I saw you. And Kyuhyun admitted it already. I don't know why you keep on hiding it to yourself. You obviously love that guy."

"You don't understand, Sungjin. Ryeowook is in love with him so-"

"At least have the courage to say to him what's on your heart, rather than you try to keep it in until he's finally gone," Sungjin clenches his fist and catches his breath. "He is decided to go to Harvard whether you like it or not. Although he is feeling conflicted now because he still cares about what you feel about him leaving. If you don't have the courage to tell him, then you would need to let him go."

"S-Sungjin..." Sungmin whispers. Then he looks at his father then to his mother. "I... I will tell him that I love him too at least before he leaves for Harvard. And I have an assurance now. Thank you."

***

Sungmin is finally out of the hospital. There is nothing serious. He is just stressed, plus the weather.

And as expected, Kyuhyun becomes his visitor the next day. "I brought you food! I know your appetite is still so..."

"I hate you!" Sungmin throws the pillow at Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun easily dodges.

"Missed me?" Kyuhyun asks as he jumps on Sungmin's bed. Sungmin blushes. "Oh you did." Kyuhyun pinches his cheek. "Cute."

"What the hell? Do you want me to kick you out of my room!?" Sungmin yells. Kyuhyun just laughs loudly. Sungmin then cuts in. "Have you passed the application already?"

Kyuhyun slowly stops from laughing then he turns away, letting his feet touch the ground. "Yes," Kyuhyun answers. After a while, he smiles and faces Sungmin again. "You know Sungmin? I-"

"My answer is yes," Sungmin seriously stares at Kyuhyun who stares back, not absorbing what he just said. "Yes. I will be your boyfriend."

Kyuhyun's jaw drops. He is literally speechless.

"Y-Yah! Aren't you going to say something? I thought you'd-"

Kyuhyun hugs him tightly, more tight than the hugs that they shared before. "I am so freaking happy, Lee Sungmin! You don't know how much I feel happy!" Kyuhyun then holds Sungmin's shoulder. "I-I... I can't believe it! Does this mean you're already mine?"

Sungmin smiles as he nods.

"Does this mean you love me too?" Kyuhyun asks again, still not believing what's happening.

Sungmin holds Kyuhyun's face then nods again. "I'm... I am also letting you go to Harvard. I am sorry for being so selfish because to be honest, I can't... I can't let you go. Three days of not seeing you almost made me crazy, what more if I don't see you for four years or so? I can't last long without you, Cho Kyuhyun. I really can't. But if it's for your own good, then I will accept the fact that you need to go and that I can't see you for four years. I also promise that I would be the greatest lawyer here in Seoul. And I also want you to be the greatest lawyer in the entire world. Or else, I'll-"

Kyuhyun cuts his sentence as he kisses Sungmin passionately. Sungmin's hands travel on Kyuhyun's back as he answers Kyuhyun's kiss. When Sungmin pulls away, Kyuhyun tries to chase his lips and captures them once more. Sungmin gives in even though needs more air. After few more seconds, he lands on the bed, back colliding with the surface and Kyuhyun above him. Kyuhyun leaves Sungmin's lips temporarily as he observes Sungmin then he carresses his face as he looks at Sungmin's eyes. "You're so beautiful."

Sungmin blushes at the remark. "It feels a lot more different now."

"I know," Kyuhyun kisses his nose then his lips again, then he whispers, "I love you."

Sungmin smiles and kisses Kyuhyun back.

***

《Again, sorry for very long update lmao something happened sooooo... HAHA Last 6 chapters.》