We were all back in the waiting room, clapping each other on the back to celebrate the trouble-free comeback stage.

"Guys, monitor, monitor," said the manager hyung, pointing at the TVs. Although the performance was "live", it wasn't completely real-time. No live music program ever was; there was always about a 5-minute delay between the performance and the broadcast so that if there was a huge accident or unexpected non-broadcastable material on stage, it wouldn't air. As far as I knew, they had never had to use the five minutes, but the leeway was there as a safety net. As a result, we were able to catch the entire performance as it aired. Although I was part of the performance, I couldn't help but marvel at the synchronicity of the 13 members. Unlike after the dry run, the members were relaxed and commented on the performances with carefree laughs.

In a few moments, we all watched as the cheers from the audience went down to greet my solo with silence. My face flushed while the members also became silent. Then, as Yesung's solo began, the cheers started up again.

"You sound really good though. I'm not sure why they reacted that way," said Ryeowook. I didn't look at him.

"Well, it was kind of awkward. He looks a bit flustered," said the manager hyung, making me wonder who wouldn't be flustered in my situation.

"It's okay. We can work on the awkward," said Eunhyuk looking into my eyes with a small laugh. "It was a good debut performance."

I nodded and looked back at the screen, but I was worried. Sungmin said that the fans had wanted to judge me on this performance, and I wondered if I did well enough to convince the fans. When the performance was over on the TV, we all looked around at the manager hyung.

"Can we go out for dinner to celebrate?" asked Kangin. When the rest of us nodded and said words of support of this statement, the manager hyung held up his hands and smiled.

"Okay," he said. When we cheered, he held up his hands again. "But remember that promotions aren't over for another six weeks, so we still need to watch your body. I'll choose the restaurant carefully. Is everyone okay with that?" We agreed. "I'll let the bus know we're ready while you guys change," said the manager hyung, and he left the waiting room.

We were led into the largest room of the traditional Korean restaurant where we ordered our food. I took a seat at the far end of the table next to Sungmin. After the waitress took our orders and had left the table, Kangin turned to look at the manager hyung.

"We can order drinks, right?" asked Kangin.

"Why do you even ask anymore?" said the manager hyung with a smile, and everyone laughed.

Soon, the waitress returned with the side dishes, and Kangin looked around. "Can we get - maybe twenty beers and ten sojus to start?"

I gawked at him for a second, but then realized that the amount of drinks he wanted was more than appropriate for the number of people at the table.

She looked at us for a second, but her gaze lingered on me. "Are all of you of age?" she asked, but I was sure she knew the answer already.

"Kyuhyun's not 20 yet, right?" asked Kangin, looking at me.

I nodded. "I'm 19," I said.

"But Kyuhyun won't be drinking," said the manager hyung, looking at the waitress.

"I'm sorry, but we can't serve alcohol if not everyone at the table is of age," said the waitress. My eyes widened. What kind of policy was this?

"What?" asked Kangin, clearly also surprised. "Why not?"

"We've been in trouble in the past with underage drinking so we have a new policy now. There's nothing I can really do," she said apologetically.

There was a buzz as the members each said what we should be doing.

"Let's go to a different restaurant," said Donghae, halfway up from his chair.

"We can't, they already started on our order," said the manager hyung, waving him back down.

"Whatever, we can have a good time without drinking," said Eunhyuk. Everyone ignored him.

"This is ridiculous. There's one guy that's underage by a few months at the table and that means none of us can drink?" said Kangin hotly.

"As much as I'd like to serve it to you, like I said, there's nothing I can really do," said the waitress. The buzz had grown to something closer to a commotion. I saw the uneasy face of the waitress and the upset faces of the members, and sighed. I couldn't stand it anymore. I got up from my chair.

"Hyung, I'm actually feeling really anxious being here anyway," I said, looking at the manager hyung. "I have a test at school next week, and I haven't even started preparing for it. Can you drive me to the library?"

There was finally silence at the table, and everyone stared at me.

"We already ordered your food," said the manager hyung carefully.

"I'm sure you can take care of it between the 13 of you," I said, slinging my bag over my shoulder. Everyone was still silent, and I was worried that I was wrecking the atmosphere, so I smiled. "I really have to go anyway. It makes sense for me to do what I need to and you guys to have fun."

I could see a few of them feeling more comfortable with the idea, but I saw Ryeowook shift in his seat. "I can come and study with you, I'm in school too," he said, also getting up from his chair.

"No, no, that makes no sense," I said quickly, waving him down. "You're not the one with a test next week. I really, really shouldn't be here anyway. Please stay. Hyung, can we - " I pleaded, looking at the manager hyung.

"Okay," said the manager hyung, getting up from his chair. He looked at the waitress. "Can we get the twenty beers and ten sojus?"

The waitress nodded and looked at me apprehensively. I shook my head and smiled at her, trying to put her at ease. None of this was really her fault. I was still aware of the uncomfortable atmosphere at the table, and so spoke again.

"I'm really sorry that I have to leave. I should have started studying for this test earlier and joined you here, but I really don't think I should stay. Is it okay with you if I leave?" I asked. There was general agreement, and I forced another smile. "Thanks," I said.

"At least take the food to go," said Sungmin. I was about to refuse, but then thought that the mood might lighten more if I agreed.

"Okay," I said, nodding. I looked at the waitress. "Should I wait for it at the counter?"

"Sure, I'm going to let the kitchen know," she said, and she went out of the room. I bowed to the team and smiled again before following her and the manager hyung out of the room. I stepped out of the room and closed the door, then finally stopped smiling as I made my way to the exit.

"Kyuhyun, your food," said the manager hyung at the counter.

I turned my head to look at him.

"I don't want it," I said, and I pushed the door out of the restaurant. The manager hyung looked troubled for a second, then ran to catch up to me.

When we reached the van, I got into the passenger seat without saying anything. I threw my bag on the back seat and I looked straight in front of me with a small frown. I bit my lower lip while the manager hyung got in the driver's seat.

There was silence for a moment while I just stared out the windshield.

"Are you okay?" asked the manager hyung cautiously.

I just chewed on my lip and didn't say anything.

"I'm really sorry it worked out this way. I didn't realize the restaurant would have this policy when I chose it," he said. I remained silent and looked into my lap. "If you want, we can - "

"No one told me I should stay," I said finally. I felt my eyes fill with disappointed tears.

The manager hyung seemed to be lost for words. We sat there in silence for a few minutes while I wiped my tears on my sleeves. When the tears stopped, I stared into my lap and let out a long breath.

"Kyuhyun, if you want, we could go somewhere else for dinner. Just the two of us."

I shook my head. "You can't leave the team alone in that restaurant. You don't know what they'll do."

There was another silence, then the manager hyung sighed.

"Well... I know you said the library, but I can't really take you somewhere so public," he said.

"I don't want to go to the library either. I don't actually have a test next week." I bit my lips again.

"Where do you want to go? The dorm?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Kyuhyun, I'm really sorry," he said, looking at me. I avoided his gaze.

"It's not your fault, hyung. You didn't know," I said, looking up and out the windshield. "The office is fine."

"Are you sure?" he asked. I finally looked at him.

"It's really funny, because... I really don't have anywhere else to go," I said with a small laugh. I turned my head to face front again, and there was another momentary silence as the manager hyung sighed.

"At least let me buy you dinner," he said. I shook my head.

"Not today, hyung. I'll take you up on the offer some other time though," I said. I put my seatbelt on. "Can we go now?"

The manager hyung sighed and eyed me again, but then put on his own seatbelt.

We didn't exchange a single word for the 10-minute drive to the office. When we reached it, I clicked my seatbelt off.

"Next time, we'll just order the food to our dorm and celebrate there," he said apologetically. I nodded and grabbed my bag from the back seat.

"They'd better be having a good freaking time right now," I said as I opened the door. "Can you make sure they do?"

The manager hyung nodded. "Don't worry," he said. I stepped out of the van.

"You'll come pick me up when you're done over there, right?" I asked. The manager hyung nodded. "Okay," I said, and after a tiny bow, I went inside the SM building with a heavy heart.