Chp 133

Kyuhyun... It's been hard on you.

I just laid there, trying to decide what had just happened when the intern came back inside.

"What happened?" he asked with a frown.

"I - I don't know," I said, still confused.

He looked at the state I was in, then he quickly took a towel and started drying my arms. When he'd finished, he got me back into a fresh hospital shirt.

"We're just waiting for the new room to get ready," he said without looking at me. His tone of voice was distant, and scared, I looked up at him.

"D - doctor, are you mad at me?" I whispered. I felt my eyes well up while the intern looked at me, surprised.

"No, no, of course not," he said quickly. "I'm so sorry, Kyuhyun. I should really be more sincere as I'm doing this. I just had some other things on my mind. I'm so sorry."

"I'm sorry, I know you wanted me to forgive him, and I really tried, I really did, but he just - left, and I didn't try to keep him in here, but - I just - "

He bit his lip and buttoned the gown while I let the tears flow. As I cried, he looked in my eyes and gave my hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Kyuhyun, are you saying you forgave him just for me?"

Flustered, I looked up at him and shook my head violently. "No - no, I didn't do it - for you, I - "

As my words trailed away, the intern put his hand on my shoulder.

"You don't have to do anything for me, Kyuhyun," he said gently. "I'm here for you, not anyone else. I'm on your side, no matter what choices you make. I'll always be on your side."

I nodded and let him wipe my tears with a towel that he had been using. And then as he finished, I smiled a little. "I'm sorry."

"Don't say you're sorry," he said with a small sigh.

And at this, I froze again. He looked so fed up with me, he was probably just holding back how frustrated he was at me, and -

"Sorry," I whispered again, and then I realized that I'd apologized again.

I expected the intern to scold me again, but he didn't. Instead, he just smiled warmly.

"It's okay, Kyuhyun. We'll work on it together."

I stared at him.

"Work on what together?" I whispered.

He looked away and frowned, as if he were holding back tears. And then he looked back into my face and forced a smile. "Getting you better. We'll work on getting you better together."

I still wasn't sure what he meant, but I just nodded as he got up from the stool and left the room.

He returned a short while after though, with a bottle of water and a straw. My eyes widened in excitement as soon as I saw him.

Was he finally going to let me drink?

I looked at him expectantly as he set everything down on the table. It was only then that I noticed that he straw that he had brought into the room was the thinnest straw I'd ever seen.

"That is such a wimpy straw," I whispered with a tiny smile, feeling my lips cracking dry at the sight of the water bottle.

He sat down on the stool and pulled on a pair of examination gloves. And then he spoke.

"You know that old story, about the water and the willow leaves?" he asked.

It was such a vague, out-of-the-blue prompt, but it being such a famous story, I understood right away. I nodded as he pushed a button, which raised the head of the bed a few degrees. As it raised, I felt a bit of pressure on my hips and pain followed, and in that, I gripped the sides of the bed as hard as I could and started talking, just to get my mind off the pain.

"Emperor Taejo was g - going through a village when he st - stopped and asked a girl for a drink of water from a well. She g - gave him a bowl of water with a few willow leaves floating on t - top so that he would have to drink it slowly, while b - blowing on the leaves. He was impressed b - by her thought and so he eventually m - married her."

The bed had stopped raising halfway through my story, but I finished the story anyway. I still wasn't sitting up, far from that, to be honest. But I was - just about halfway there, maybe I could sit up on my own someday soon. As I let go of the sides of the bed, the intern nodded and smiled.

"Quite the historian, aren't you?"

"Not - not really," I said, taking deep breaths. I looked up and into his eyes. "Everyone should know that if they re - remember history from elementary school, or if they watched that - that historical drama from a few years back. D - did you watch it?"

The intern stared at me for a little, then he shook his head. "Uh, no. I was in med school when that aired, and it was hard. I didn't have time to watch dramas."

I smiled a little. "I was in middle school and - and I still watched it."

He laughed. "Anyway, Kyuhyun, what was the moral of the story?" he asked.

I stared at him, still unable to see what he was trying to do. "Nothing. It was - was supposed to show how wise she was and why she was his favourite wife."

The intern smiled.

"I learned an important lesson from that story. If you drink water too fast when you're thirsty, you'll get sick. Now open," he said, holding the wooden stick close to my mouth.

I laughed a little before grimacing in pain at my sides. I squeezed my eyes shut and looked up at him. "You sh - shouldn't make me laugh, it hurts."

"Sorry, Kyuhyun," he said with a smile of his own. "Open, please."

I opened my mouth and he put the stick in my mouth, further and further down my throat until I gagged. As I did, he quickly drew the stick out of my mouth and took me by the back of my head to support it up.

"Perfect," he said with a smile, then he picked up the bottle of water and poured some of it into a plastic cup. And then he peeled off the wrapping on the small straw and put it in the water. I stared at him and he nodded with encouragement. "Let's try this out."

He started moving the water closer to my face, and I instinctively reached out for it with my hands when he shook his head and drew it away.

"Don't touch, I've got it," he said, then when I dropped my hands down to my side again, he held out the cup and the straw to my mouth. When I looked at him uncertainly, he smiled. "Go ahead."

I hastily opened my mouth and took the straw in my mouth, but it took me several tries to get any water into my mouth; my lips were so dry that they didn't make a tight enough seal around the straw. Only after I'd finally gotten enough water through the straw to wet my lips did I start drinking.

It was almost frustrating how slowly the straw dictated that the water came up, but I stayed at it persistently until I finished the half-filled glass of water.

"How does it feel?" asked the intern, pulling the straw out of my mouth as I emptied the glass.

I swallowed the rest of what was in my mouth and frowned a little. "It feels good in my mouth and my throat, but - "

"Not so good in your stomach?"

I grimaced. "No, it feels - "

"Uncomfortable, I bet."

"I almost feel hungrier," I said, wincing at the burning feeling. "And it's almost like... Like I can feel my stomach."

The intern laughed as I smiled back.

"It tastes so sweet though," I clarified. I had been so thirsty that even the water tasted so, so good. The intern smiled.

"One more glass?" he asked.

I nodded enthusiastically as he poured me another half a glass of water. I drank that too, as fast as the straw would allow, and when I finished, I was left still unsatiated and uncomfortable, and definitely even more aware of my hunger.

"One more?" I asked expectantly.

"Later. Let's make sure that you can keep it down first," he said with a smile.

I nodded and settled my head back onto the bed, which he kept raised. I watched as he adjusted the IV flow, then I fiddled with my fingers before looking up at him.

"When do I get more?" I asked.

"In a few hours," he said, taking the chart off the foot of my bed and scribbling on it.

"After I've moved to the new room?"

At the moment, the door opened, revealing a few nurses who had been taking care of me in the ICU. The intern greeted them with a smile and put the chart back down.

"We're actually going to move you now. So yes."

Soon, the bed was lowered again and the nurses were gathered around my bed with a moving board like the time I was moved for surgery. This time, though, my heart was pounding with excitement as opposed to fear, and that was an infinitely better feeling.

When I was transported onto the gurney, the intern strapped me securely to it and spoke. "Thank you, I can take him from here."

"Sounds good," said one of the nurses, and then she looked at me. "Are you ready to leave us?"

I chuckled and looked into each of their eyes. "Thank you," I said genuinely. "Thank you for everything."

"Good luck on the rest of your recovery, Kyuhyun. It was a pleasure having you here."

The nurses smiled and slid the door open for me while the intern finally wheeled me out of my ICU room and into the hallway. We stopped in front of the elevator, and as we waited, I turned my head to look at the intern.

"It feels so weird," I murmured.

"What does?"

"Leaving the ICU." I paused as the elevator dinged and he wheeled me into the emptly elevator. And then I spoke while staring at one of the walls. "I should be happy leaving it, because I know that means I'm getting better," I said. "But I'm sad to leave everyone - everything behind."

"Don't think about what you'll be leaving behind," he said. "You'll be so much happier in your new room."

I thought for a second, then nodded. "You're right. I mean, everything from more than one visitor to the window, to real flowers instead of articifial ones, I'm sure I'll - "

The elevator dinged again. It apparently wasn't our floor though, and it had stopped to let in a few more people. I stopped talking and closed my eyes instead to avoid having to look at anyone else until the elevator dinged.

I opened my eyes a slit before realizing that I was going through a hallway with warm, lights and even more people bustling. I groaned a little and closed my eyes shut tighter. It wasn't until the door to my new room slid open and the intern had wheeled me into it that I opened my eyes.

The first thing I saw was the ceiling. White, of course. I then saw the TV, heard it too, faintly. It was on, and - oh god, I saw Super Junior playing on it, it must have been a rerun, or maybe whoever my roommate was a fan and was watching us on video, I was pretty sure that everyone had stopped activities for a while...

And then my gaze move to the side, to the window. It still wasn't that huge, but it was definitely an improvement to that tiny one from the ICU, and -

"Kyuhyun!"

A familiar voice. No, not just familiar; it was a voice I knew so well and one I missed so much, a voice I'd so wanted to hear before I lost consciousness, before my surgery -

My head turned, so fast that it took my eyes a while to focus. And when it did, I just stared at him for so long without saying anything.

"Seunghwan hyung!"

He was in a hospital gown, sitting up on his bed and watching me being brought in.

"Hey - hey, hey," he said. The corners of his mouth turned upwards and he smiled. "Hey."

"Hyung - hyung - "

I stared at him, wide-eyed for a few seconds, and then I started sobbing.

I didn't understand why I was crying, but the intern had placed the gurney close enough to Seunghwan hyung's bed that he could reach out and hold my hand.

"Hyung - "

The intern lowered the gurney until Seunghwan hyung and I were at the same eye level, and then he put his hand on my shoulder before whispering in my ear.

"Are you okay with this room?"

I nodded and looked up at him. "Thank you," I said, tears still streaming down my face. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, Kyuhyun," said the intern with a warm smile. "I'll be back in a few minutes with a team to move you into the bed, okay?"

I nodded, but my attention wasn't on him anymore as he left the room. I was just looking into Seunghwan hyung's smiling face, trying to decide what I was supposed to say, what I was supposed to do. But Seunghwan hyung spoke first.

"Kyuhyun, how're you feeling?" he asked gently.

"Good, hyung, how about you?" I whispered.

"Just - so happy that you're here," he said. He smiled. "I know - I know you were so hurt, so I'm so happy that you were able to make it here."

"I'm just so happy that I got to see you again," I managed.

I squeezed his hand.

"Has the team been to see you?" I asked.

He nodded. "I've seen everyone except Ryeowook," he said. "Have you?"

I stared at him. He hadn't understood.

"I meant your other team, hyung."

He paused.

"No," he said finally. "I mean - they're really busy getting ready for their debut."

I nodded uncertainly.

"And - hyung - "

It was so strange. I'd wanted to wish him luck in love and work before anything could happen, but now that we were both here, it felt so awkward to suddenly tell him...

As I was hesitating, the door opened and the intern stepped inside with a team of nurses. I breathed a sigh of relief that they'd saved me from the awkwardness while they gathered around the gurney.

"Okay, Kyuhyun, we're going to move you to your new bed," he said. I nodded and folded my arms across my chest as I was lifted into the new, freshly-made bed.

"Does that feel okay?" asked the intern.

"I think so," I said, then I cringed. "There's just - a crease in the sheets - "

I was about the continue and tell him where the crease was, but then I realized that Seunghwan hyung was watching with eyes as if to say, "You can't even reposition yourself to straighten the sheets under you?" And at that, I stopped talking. Thankfully though, the intern picked up on it.

"Where?" he asked quietly.

"Just - at my back," I whispered.

I felt the sheets being pulled straight, and then the intern adjusted the pillow under my head.

"Tell me if you need anything else, Kyuhyun."

I nodded and thanked him before he left the room again.

I almost closed my eyes, being so tired and so spent, but then I opened them again when I remembered that I had company now. I turned my head to look at Seunghwan hyung when he smiled.

"You've worked so hard for so long now, Kyuhyun," he said with a warm smile. "At least while you're here - get as much rest as you can, okay?"

I nodded, and taking this as permission to go to sleep, I closed my eyes again and drifted off to sleep.

 

 

I woke up to the sound of the door sliding open again. I opened my eyes and looked to the door to realize that a nurse was in the room, delivering dinner for Seunghwan hyung. I watched enviously as he placed the tray on the table. I looked at the nurse expectantly as well, but she left the room without saying anything to me.

I set my head back down on the pillow, ignoring my growling stomach, as Seunghwan hyung looked at me.

"Why aren't you eating?"

"I'm not allowed yet," I said, trying to sound as strong as possible. I turned my head to look at him and realized that he wasn't eating. I forced out a smile as he put down his chopsticks. "That doesn't mean you're not either, though, hyung. Pretend I'm not here."

I closed my eyes and tried to go back to sleep just as the door opened a second time. The intern had come back into the room with a nurse and a bottle of what looked like -

"Do you like apple juice?"

I smiled with appreciation nodded enthusiastically as the intern laughed and tilted up the bed. He had that tiny straw in half a glass of juice again, and I drank as fast as I could, as much as I possibly could. It was the first thing even close to food as I'd had in so long, and I felt like I could take in more apple juice than there was apple juice in the world, and -

"Slow down, Kyuhyun, you're going too fast," said the intern in a warning tone. He tried to pull the cup away from my mouth but before he could and before I even understood what I was doing, I reached up with my hands and took a hold of his wrists so that he couldn't move the cup away, exerting more strength than I had for a long time.

I didn't even stop to take a breath. It just tasted so good. Only after I'd finished the glass did I let go.

"Kyuhyun," sighed the intern.

I felt the apple juice going down and settling uncomfortably in my stomach. I looked up into his eyes as I felt my insides churning.

"I'm so sorry, I couldn't - "

And then I felt everything come back up.

I instinctively craned my neck over the side of the bed and threw up everything I'd just drank. It felt more terrible than ever. My entire chest was in pain; everything hurt so much, yet I couldn't stop retching. My eyes teared up from both pain and throwing up, and as I gasped for a breath in between the retches, I couldn't hold back a loud grunt of pain. When the bout of retches stopped, I lifted my head up and realized that Seunghwan hyung was staring at me with his eyes widened. And in the middle of my ordeals, I looked up at the nurse through my glassy eyes.

"C - can you p - please draw the curtains?" I managed, then I retched again to throw up the last bit of apple juice that was left in my stomach before Seunghwan hyung's horrified face disappeared behind the curtains.

 

 

 

*Author's note: I updated bonus scenes a few days ago. This is the last heads-up I'm going to give to you guys on here about an update the bonus scenes. Thank you :)

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Comments

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secretanimelover #1
I might actually cry. This fic has always been so special to me and I used to come back and read my fave chapters regularly. I am so grateful that you are letting us all have access to it again. Thank you so much!
ferris_wheel
#2
Chapter 151: Thank you, i always go back to this whenever i need something to read. So thank you
mykyunie #3
Chapter 150: Love it very much
kyunniebiased4life
#4
I AM SO HAPPY TO SEE THIS UP AGAIN! I had to get a web archive from this to be able to read it. Thank you so much for allowing us to revisit this amazing story of our beloved maknae. Its a little bittersweet reading about Jonghyun, but I still love this so much.
bananajun
#5
hey, thank you so much for bringing this back.
mikaella_suju #6
Wahh I didn't know you republished this again. I literally searched the whole web just so I can re read
this again. I remembered messaging someone on Twitter asking for the link for this on wayback machine (webarchive.org). I really love this, its been years since I've read this but I still remember how good this was. Thank you for writing such an amazing fic!❤
Maymayz #7
Chapter 150: Oh my god you opened it again!!!!! I'm tearing up😭😭😭
Thank you so much for your hard work💙💙
mykyunie #8
Chapter 151: I do not understand why you are not satisfied with this job. I am not a writer, I only dedicate myself to reading the works of others, and believe me I have read many, many fics. and I must tell you that this fic is wonderful.
You cannot imagine how infinitely grateful I am that you allowed us to read it again since you stated that you did not intend to republish it.
This was the first fic I had the opportunity to read here at AFF and although I have read it many times each time I have done it, I end up in a sea of ​​tears because of the emotional roller coaster that Kyu had to go through to win the love of his hyungs and also about living the accident and recovering to achieve success.
thank you very much.
Henry9599 #9
Chapter 151: hello, i was wondering if there was sequel for "kyuhyun its been hard on you" ? I really really love that story. I really hope you can consider about sequel or one shot about suju if you are avialable. Really thank you for your amazing and lovely stories
Fridel2
#10
Chapter 151: I remember being blown away by the concept and the talent you showed. I'll keep an eye out for your AO3 ~