I put the receiver down and stared at the ceiling for a while. Then when I turned my head to look at Seunghwan hyung, I saw through the dimly lit light that he was looking at me, smiling. I stared back.

"What's so funny?" I whispered.

"Nothing," he said mildly, but he continued smiling.

I sighed, turned my attention back to the ceiling for a short moment, then I looked at him again.

"Hyung, why are you so hard on Jungsu hyung?"

He hesitated for a long while before speaking.

"Because he has a lot of responsibilities. He has to lead by example. And he's right. He really needs to be strong for all of you."

I tilted my head to the side, not understanding. Then I spoke meaningfully and quietly.

"I wonder how much better he could do without all the pressure on him."

I heard Seunghwan hyung chuckle before speaking again. "Why, are you asking me to lay off?"

I looked into his eyes, which were sparkling in the moonlight.

"Yeah."

Seunghwan hyung laughed.

"I'll keep that in mind for when I return to work."

I felt a smile at my lips, then it faded as I remembered.

"Hyung, I - I'm so sorry about - "

He stared at me as if he didn't know what I was talking about, and I bit my lip.

"You know, about - you having to leave that - that girl group, hyung."

He smiled sadly.

"It's okay," he said, shaking his head. "They're going to debut in just over two months or so, and they need an able-bodied manager more than ever."

I bit my lip and looked at him.

"Hyung, I know I'm being really, really selfish," I whispered, "but I'm - I'm so happy you're going to be back with us."

Seunghwan hyung laughed in the next bed.

"Well, I'm honoured, Kyuhyun."

I pulled my blanket up higher. "I'm really sorry for thinking this way."

"Don't say that."

"But I feel better knowing that once I get out of here, you're going to be there."

Seunghwan hyung chuckled again, and I finally closed my eyes to sleep.

I awoke the next morning to Seunghwan hyung's breakfast tray already being taken away, and the nurse adjusting my IV lines.

"Good morning, Kyuhyun," she said kindly.

"Good morning," I said groggily.

"Are you ready for breakfast?"

I nodded eagerly and sat up quickly in my bed.

It didn't really hurt much to sit up anymore. I felt comfortable sitting up. And when my tray table was placed in front of me, I dug in hungrily.

I heard Seunghwan hyung chuckle, but I ignored him and continued eating. Halfway through my breakfast, I heard Seunghwan hyung pick up the phone next to his bed and dial. I wondered if he was calling Leeteuk to scold him more or perhaps even apologize for last night, but in the way he exchanged the informal greeting, I knew that he hadn't called Leeteuk.

I turned my head, still chewing, to watch him take his call.

"Jinsoo, do you think you could do me a favour?" he said into his phone with a sigh. "I think I'll have to move my things out of my place and into the dorm again."

He listened for a little while before shaking his head.

"No. Ours. I mean, yours. I mean, the one you're at right now. It seems I'll be returning to Super Junior. I know."

He chuckled a little, then he bit his lip.

"No, there was no contract for my apartment. I just paid monthly rent on no contract, so it shouldn't be a problem. So I'm just going to speak with the landlord over the phone, and then - "

He waited, then smiled.

"Okay. Thank you so much. I know I'm asking for a lot."

He paused again, then for whatever reason, he hesitated while glancing at me. "Um - "

I looked away quickly and scooped up a spoonful of soup instead as Seunghwan hyung spoke quietly. "I think I'll be back at the dorm to stay within a few days. A week at the most."

I almost choked on my food.

A few days?

"Okay. See you soon. Thanks again," said Seunghwan hyung. And as soon as he hung up, I finally put my spoon down and looked at him.

"Hyung, you're - you're leaving the hospital in a few days?" I asked, pained.

Seunghwan hyung laughed. "I can't afford to stay here for much longer, Kyuhyun," he said. "I'm supposed to start rehab in a few days, and I can rehab at home."

"But - " I said, feeling my face scrunch up.

I didn't know how I could cope with being here alone. It would be so lonely... and he'd been so much silent strength to me all this time.

"It'll be okay," he said, smiling. "I have faith that you'll do well on your own."

I returned his smile with a forced smile of my own.

"Yeah," I said sadly.

And then I looked up and smiled again.

"Look, I'm being selfish again," I said. I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. "You're right. I can do well on my own, too."

Seunghwan hyung smiled and nodded. "And I'll be there when you get out."

"Yeah," I managed.

I turned back to my food, suddenly no longer feeling hungry, and I spent the next hour doing nothing but picking at the food.

Only two days later, Seunghwan hyung was getting ready to leave the ward, and I was left feeling so anxious that I couldn't stay still; my stomach twisted up into such a tight knot that I felt like I might implode if I didn't move continuously.

It was so strange to see Seunghwan hyung finally out of his hospital gown and in regular clothes again.

"So if you come in next week for an hour or two, we'll start on a new exercise," said the doctor.

Seunghwan hyung nodded, smiled, and took the doctor's hand to shake it. "Thank you so much, doctor. For everything during my stay here."

"You're very welcome. I'll see you next week."

After they exchanged their final greetings and the doctor left the room, Seunghwan hyung began packing up the things on his bedside table into his bag, at which I began to feel even more nervous.

"Maybe I should go back to the dorm for rehab, too," I said, shuffling in my bed uncomfortably.

"Don't be ridiculous. You need all the care you can get for this," said Seunghwan hyung sharply.

I sighed, frustrated. "But hyung, you do too!"

He shook his head. "No one's going to notice a limp on me even if things don't go well. You have to dance, Kyuhyun. You have to recover perfectly."

I was about to retort that he had to be stronger than we were since he always had to carry heavy loads for the rest of us, but then the door to the room opened, revealing Jinsoo hyung, closely followed by Heechul.

"Hyung, congratulations!" shouted Heechul at the doorway with a wide smile.

"Thank you," said Seunghwan hyung, almost shyly. I pouted without even realizing it as Jinsoo hyung and Heechul both rushed to Seunghwan hyung's side to help him into the wheelchair.

Jinsoo hyung pushed the wheelchair to the door and paused a little, as I clenched my fists and chewed on my lip. Seunghwan hyung turned his head to look at me for a second, then he laughed.

"Kyuhyun, you look like you're about to cry."

I shook my head vigorously. "No, I'm not," I said, then I took a deep breath. If I can't stop this, I might as well make it as happy as I can make it for both of us. I forced a smile, unclenched my fists and waved at him. "Bye," I managed. "You'll call me, right?"

"Right," confirmed Seunghwan hyung. "And you'll join us again soon. I promise."

I smiled and nodded. "Good luck, hyung," I said bravely, but felt a tear of regret and disappointment, and even worry fell from my eye.

And seeing this, Seunghwan hyung chuckled again. "Aw, Kyuhyun."

God, what happened to making it a happy good-bye?

I hung my head, trying to hide my tears, and soon, Seunghwan hyung's wheelchair was next to my bed. I kept my head down, but he took my hands with one hand and wiped the tear with the other. "See you again soon. Eat lots, listen to your doctors and work hard on getting better, okay?" he said.

"Okay," I whispered.

Seunghwan hyung smiled and squeezed my hands as I sniffled. "The sooner you get better, the sooner you can get out of here."

He patted the top of my head. "I love you, Kyuhyun."

"Love you too," I managed.

We both reached over towards each other to give each other a long hug, and finally, Seunghwan hyung left the room with Jinsoo hyung with a final wave good-bye.

As soon as he left, I laid back down on the bed with a huge sigh when Heechul came to my side.

"Hey, don't feel too bad."

I nodded. "I know. I just - " I sighed again. "He was really good company."

Heechul smiled. "I'll have the guys visit more often so that you're not lonely here."

I shook my head. "You'll be busy preparing for promotions," I said, trying not to sound bitter.

Heechul shook his head. "Then we'll call you all the time. Even in the middle of the night."

I laughed. I never knew Heechul would be so good at lifting the mood.

I finally looked up at him, then reached up for Heechul's hair. "I like your new hair," I said, running my fingers through it.

He shook his head and brushed my hand off of his head. "It's too damn short," he said, clearly unhappy.

"I think it looks good," I insisted.

Heechul smoothed the sides of his hair, then smiled ruefully.

"It's supposed to be for the second album," he said, clearly absent-mindedly, covering the top of his head.

I froze.

There was a long, awkward silence, then I cleared my throat.

"Oh," I said quietly.

I clamped my mouth shut and began fiddling with my fingers when he ran his hand over the top of my head.

"Hey, I know how you must feel," he said quietly. "I was in the same position as you last year when I was at the hospital."

I shook my head. "It eventually worked out for you last year," I whispered.

"I know I got lucky." Heechul smiled faintly. "But you might get lucky too."

"I don't know," I sighed. Heechul smiled again.

"Now it's really important that you get better soon, okay? Maybe they'll change their mind if you get better sooner."

I nodded to promise him that I would get better soon.

"Have hope, Kyuhyun. And stay happy. Okay?"

I nodded again, and forced a smile. "Okay, hyung."

"Get well soon, Kyuhyun," said Heechul, then he kissed my forehead as I closed my eyes.

I only stayed in the bed for about a week, during which I spent all of my day just watching the TV shows that our members were on and playing computer games, just trying to calm down my nervous heart, after which I finally began rehab. I was in a rush. I wanted to get better soon so that I would have at least a fighting chance at joining them for the second album, but it seemed impossible in the current state.

When I was still just struggling to stand with support a week later, I was almost in tears of frustration by the end of the day.

"You just need to be patient," the intern had said, "trying to rush yourself won't get you anywhere," but the words weren't soothing as they should be. And when they put me to bed, I was in it, still discouraged.

I couldn't sleep for a long time, having so many thoughts in my head. There were too many "What if"s, and so many things that I didn't want happening. As these thoughts filled my head, I grabbed at my hair, then sat up in my bed.

I wanted out of this room, at least.

I got into the wheelchair that was sitting beside my bed with much difficulty, then finally wheeled myself to the door. I hesitated a little before opening the door quietly and peeked out. No one was there in the hallway. It was completely empty and completely silent. It was also somewhat dark; most of the lights were turned off, and the lights in the hallway had also been dimmed. Everything was a shade of grey. I continued rolling my wheelchair down the completely deserted hall aimlessly when I came across a set of elevators. I pushed the button that would take me upstairs, and when the elevator dinged, I got on it.

Maneuvering the wheelchair on the elevator was difficult. I still wasn't really used to it, and there wasn't enough space for me to move the wheelchair around as I wanted; it was therefore not until a few seconds after the door closed that I finally got close enough to the buttons. I contemplated, then I decided to just choose a random floor. The 9th.

The elevator took me there in no time, and soon, it had dinged open, I struggled out of the elevator, then I rolled it out into the hall.

I was just slowly rolling the wheelchair down it when I saw something at the end of the hall. It seemed like - oh god, it was a ghost -

My heart began to race, but my arms were frozen in place, too scared to move the wheelchair away. And in that time, the ghost moved closer towards me. I was almost about to scream when the figure got close enough for me to see her face.

It was just a little girl of 6 or 7 in a hospital gown just like mine, and she was skipping happily towards me.

"Hello," she said with a wide smile.

"Gosh, you scared me!" I said, panting.

She laughed, amused, then she cocked her head. "Are you sick too?"

"I guess," I said, stating the the obvious, but she just seemed confused.

"You don't look sick," said the girl, staring at me. "You look good to me."

I smiled a little. "That's good to hear."

"What's wrong with you?" she asked.

I hesitated a little before speaking.

"Got in an accident," I said quietly. I looked up into her round, shocked eyes. "How about you?"

"My heart doesn't beat right."

She looked at me proudly.

"But I'm going to get better. The doctors said I could be well enough to go to school next year."

I felt my eyes going wet. God, what did she know? What did she do to deserve anything?

"Are you going to get better, too?" she asked.

I nodded at her. "I hope so."

She looked at me a bit pitifully. "Well, me too."

She then looked at my wheelchair and started playing with the spokes. I quickly grabbed her wrist pulled her hand away.

"Don't, you're going to get hurt," I said. I didn't want her fingers to get caught in the spokes when the wheels were moving.

She pouted and looked at me angrily for a second, but her eyes were soon smiling again.

"Yeah. I have to listen to adults to get better."

I felt tears come again, but I held them back and nodded at her and her head.

"Stay strong," I managed.

"Okay," she said, but she wasn't paying attention; she was staring at the wheels again. A small smile came to my lips, then I spoke.

"Well, get better soon," I said, turning my wheelchair around.

She didn't say anything. I sighed and started rolling the wheelchair down the hallway again when I heard small footsteps from behind me.

I frowned and turned my head to see that the little girl was following me. My eyes widened as I stopped my wheelchair.

"Hey, you have to go back to your own room!" I said.

She ignored me, came close to the chair and held on to the arm of the chair. "Where do you live?"

"What?" I said, flustered.

"Which floor do you live on? I live on this one."

I almost burst out laughing; she thought we lived at the hospital. And then I realized painfully that she probably thought everyone lived here because she'd spent such a long time here.

"I - I - " I bit my lip. I was afraid that she'd risk her health to find me sometime. Maybe I was being delusional. Maybe she didn't like me as much as I thought she might, but it was still fun to think that I still had fans. "It's a secret."

She widened her eyes. "Why?" she asked.

I shook my head. "Because - I don't know," I said, admonishing myself internally for being so irresponsible with the answer. But she didn't seem to mind as much.

"But I want see you again," she said with a pout.

I held back a smile. So she was planning on trying to find me after all.

"You like me, don't you?" I asked jokingly.

She smiled shyly. "Yeah."

Taken aback by her frank response, I just laughed for a few seconds before finally coming to.

But she's not healthy enough to be running around all over the hospital...

I decided on a compromise.

"I'll come here again tomorrow at this time."

"Really?" she asked, her wide eyes staring into mine.

I nodded. "Yeah. I'll come here again tomorrow. But you don't have to come out if you're feeling sick, okay?"

"Okay," she said, her eyes sparkling. I patted the top of her head.

"Now go to bed," I said sternly, but she wasn't fazed. She gave a shout of glee, then she ran down the hall in the opposite direction towards her room. I chuckled at her innocence, then I rolled my wheelchair to the elevators to finally return to my room.

The next day was just as difficult as the day before. I went through the painful exercises, and I was still struggling just to stand, holding onto the support. And although it was such a difficult, tiring day, when it got to be around 3am, I found myself getting into my wheelchair to meet up with the girl. It was only then that I realized that maybe this wasn't the best idea, and maybe I should have thought about the little girl's health. It probably wasn't healthy for her to be out and about, let alone not sleeping at night, and I'd encouraged that. But a promise was a promise, and holding on to my nervous chest, I made my way back to the elevators.

I pushed the 9th floor button again, a bit better with the wheelchair this time. When I finally arrived on the 9th floor, I looked out of the elevator nervously. I almost hoped that the little girl wouldn't be here and was getting her rest, but almost as soon as I got out of the elevator, I heard a shout, as if a continuation of the shout that I'd heard as I parted with her yesterday.

"Oppa!"

I heard footsteps running closer in the darkness, and before I knew it, the little girl was in my arms.

"Shh. Hello, there," I said with a laugh, worried that we might be waking other patients in the ward. She quieted down instantly and began whispering.

"Oppa, I brought something for you, so that you can get better," she said, quickly climbing off of my lap and hiding something behind her back. Not having caught what was in her hand when she had hugged me, I was overcome with genuine curiosity.

"What is it?" I asked.

She widened her eyes with a wide smile, then she held it out.

I took it from her, curious as to what it was.

It was a packaged ice cream cone, the kind you can get at any grocery store.

But it wasn't cold anymore, and it felt mushy beneath the packaging. I looked at her, confused, when she began the explanation.

"The nurse unnie gave it to me after I had the bitter type of medicine after dinner," she said, her face scrunching up as if she could still taste it in . "But I wanted to give it to you, so I didn't eat it and hid it under my bed until now. Because I think it will help you get better."

She looked up at me with her sparkling eyes, and I felt my hand going to my chest, being so touched. Because I knew that for her, the ice cream cone must have meant a lot to give away.

And because she really showed me that she wanted me to get better.

"Wow, thank - thank you," I managed.

"You're welcome," she said easily with a smile. "But you have to get better, okay?"

I forced a smile and nodded.

"Okay," I whispered, then I kissed the top of her head. "I promise, I promise I'll get better."

*Author's note: Sorry for trolling you earlier... haha