Hankyung just stared at me for a few seconds, then he finally opened his mouth.

And then I think he said something in Chinese.

"Um - what?" I asked, flustered.

He rubbed his eyes and shook his head. "How are you here?" he asked in Korean, sitting up halfway.

I smiled shyly. "I just - needed help with my Chinese," I said.

Hankyung just stared at me, then he laid back down.

"Two hours," he said groggily.

"Two hours?" I asked, confused.

"I'll sleep two more hours, then I can help," he said, then he pulled his blanket up over his head without even reacting any more to my presence.

I wasn't sure what to do for the two hours, but being so tired, I didn't know what to do except sleep.

I walked into the living room. The living room clearly hadn't been cleaned in a while.

"Why didn't Heechul hyung make Kibum clean...?" I asked myself, shaking his head. I tried to lie down on the floor, but it was so dirty that I couldn't bring myelf to do it.

I sighed, then put my bag down on the two-person couch. I opened the closet door, took out the broom, and started sweeping.

I started out just sweeping a place on the floor of the living room just big enough for me to lie down in, but once I started, I felt like I had to finish. I ended up sweeping the entire living room, the hallway, and the kitchen.

When I finished, I shook my head. "I can't believe I just did that," I muttered. I had just voluntarily done extra chores. I sighed, then I finally lied down in the living room, closed my eyes, and fell asleep.

Hankyung was the one to wake me up a few hours later.

"It's mid-afternoon, why are you sleeping?"

I opened my eyes, and it took me a while to remember where I was. I opened my eyes to see Hankyung with his arms crossed, standing over me.

I looked at the clock; it was already 4pm. Wow, how much had I slept? Almost five hours?

I quickly stood up and gave him a bow.

"Hi," I said quickly. "Sorry."

Hankyung looked around for a second, and no doubt saw the cleaned living room, and I was instantly glad that I'd cleaned.

I wasn't sure if he was going to scold me, but when he next spoke, it was in such a friendly tone.

"Did you eat?" he asked.

I stared at him. "Since I got here? No, of course not," I said.

"Let's - um... let's - do Chinese after we eat?" asked Hankyung in his broken Korean.

"Okay," I said, then I paused. I didn't think Hankyung had ever tasted my cooking, and I wasn't sure what he was expecting.

However, I needn't have worried.

"Do you like fried rice?" he asked.

I looked up at him, surprised. "You're going to cook?"

Hankyung shrugged. "Sure," he said, then he walked into the kitchen.

Flustered, I followed him there. I just watched as Hankyung opened the rice cooker, and scooped out the cold rice sitting in it.

I just watched him cook for a moment, then I spoke.

"Do you always do the cooking?" I asked. "How come you don't make Kibum do it?"

"Kibum's always busy," said Hankyung. "And he's so tired."

I smiled a little. "And Heechul hyung's okay with that?"

"Heechul really likes Kibum," said Hankyung with a nod. "Heechul would sometimes do the cleaning so Kibum can rest."

My eyes widened. "Heechul hyung would?" I asked in disbelief.

Hankyung laughed. "Heechul is a good friend, when you know him," said Hankyung.

I shook my head. "I don't know, but whatever I do is never good enough for him."

"It's because - " Hankyung paused, evidently searching for words, or maybe formulating a sentence in his head. "He thinks importantly about the - hyung - dongsaeng - "

I nodded. I interpreted this sentence to mean that Heechul put emphasis on seniority.

"I know," I said. "I know. But even when I do respect him - "

"He doesn't like newcomers," said Hankyung.

"No one likes newcomers," I said quietly. "I'm also not really a newcomer anymore."

"He thinks you're rude," said Hankyung.

I sighed. I guessed that much.

"He told me you yelled at him yesterday so you won't get hit," he said.

I stared at him. Heechul already told Hankyung?

"If you don't get hit this time, he will stay mad," said Hankyung.

I sighed. "Then I guess I have no choice."

Hankyung cracked an egg into the frying pan expertly, then started mixing it in with the rice. Then he finally spoke.

"That is the other problem he has about you," said Hankyung. "You don't think - think beatings seriously."

I looked up, surprised. "What are you talking about? I can't stand being beaten," I said. Hankyung shook his head.

"Not that. I'm sure he wants you to say sorry, and say to stop and then promise you'll never do it again. He wants to know that you learned something," said Hankyung. "But when you get hit, you just get hit then you go to your room."

"I know I'm young, but I still have pride," I said quietly. "I don't feel the need to grovel at his feet. Or anyone's feet. At least if I don't feel like I did anything wrong."

Hankyung simply shrugged, then he turned over the rice in the pan once more and declared it finished.

Hankyung's cooking was almost unbelievably delicious, and I volunteered to do the dishes from the meal as well as whatever was left in the sink from days before. After I finished, we finally sat down on the floor of the living room and started studying.

I think it would have been lying to say that Hankyung was too much help. He totally forgot that I had just started learning to speak Mandarin two days ago; he started speaking to me in Mandarin excitedly throughout the lesson, but it was some of the most fun I'd had since being with the team.

Believe it or not, he felt comfortable, and although he was one of the oldest hyungs, he was playful. And I felt like I was being taken care of.

It felt like having someone to lean on again, and in that short time, I found myself telling bits and pieces about myself that I hadn't told anyone else before, and he told me stories about China and his decision to come to Korea. We shared laughs and held back tears in our conversation, and I had probably what was one of the first heart-to-heart conversations that felt truly comforting with someone on the team.

And before I knew it, the three hours were up and the manager was back to pick us up for practice.

"Ready to go?" he asked.

Hankyung and I stood up, but I didn't think I was ready. I wasn't ready to leave Hankyung's care. But I nodded and followed Hankyung to the front door.

"By the way, Christmas schedules are out," said the new manager. I looked up excitedly. Would I finally get to spend a night at home?

"All of us, including the managers, were given Christmas eve and Christmas day off," he said. I smiled widely. This was too good to be true. "We still have to work through New Year's Day and the days surrounding it. I told everyone else already. Everyone's going home, and you two are free to do whatever you like as well."

I bit my lip to conceal the too-wide smile that appeared on my face. I was excited to go home; I hadn't been home in a long time. I looked up at Hankyung, expecting an equally happy face, but he looked almost sullen.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Hankyung didn't say anything for a second, then I realized how insensitive I was being. Of course... "You can't go home for Christmas."

Hankyung smiled. "Because I can't go home and be back in one day."

"Right," I said uncertainly.

I knew how hard it was to be alone.

I considered inviting Hankyung over to my house to spend Christmas with, but I wasn't sure whether my relationship with my parents was stable enough.

I suppressed a sigh, then looked at Hankyung. "I can't go home for Christmas, either. My parents are away on vacation."

Hankyung widened his eyes. "Really?" he asked.

"Yeah," I smiled and nodded. "Do you want to spend Christmas at the bigger dorm with me?"

Hankyung looked away for a second, then he smiled and nodded. "That would be nice," he said.

Then we met each other's eyes and smiled.

It was another long night of practice and another Mandarin lesson, and I finally stepped inside the dorm tiredly. I hadn't been here for just two days, but it already felt like such, such a long time. And strangely enough, I'd missed it.

I was halfway in Donghae and Sungmin's room, and then realized that this wasn't my room anymore. I shook my head and headed into Leeteuk and Ryeowook's room. It didn't feel like my room yet, but I guessed I'd have to get used to it.

I opened the door, and I was surprised with the presence of Leeteuk already in the room. He had his back to the door, and I stopped dead in my tracks awkwardly.

"Hi, sunbaenim," I said, but then I saw him jump for some reason as he turned around.

I frowned with confusion. Why was he so surprised to see me?

I just watched him looking at me, then I realized...

In his hand was the letter from the manager hyung, barely even readable because of the tape covering the entire thing...

"DON'T TOUCH IT!" I shouted. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

I took quick, large strides towards Leeteuk and snatched the letter out of his hand.

I glared at him, unable to say the words that were on my mind, but trying to get them across by just looking at him.

"Oh god, Kyuhyun," whispered Leeteuk. "What is it that he did for you?"

I glared at him. "That's between me and him," I said with contempt.

"You ripped it," he said, looking at the letter in my hand.

I quickly folded it back up and shoved it into the envelope.

"I was angry," I said.

"And then you put it back together again?"

I didn't say anything.

"And now you keep it under your mattress?"

"I had nowhere else to put it," I said.

"Kyuhyun," started Leeteuk quietly, but he was interrupted by a scream from the living room.

"CHO KYUHYUN! COME OUT HERE!"

I bit my lip, and I quickly stowed the envelope under the mattress again. As I was doing so, there was another yell.

"CHO KYUHYUN!"

I looked into Leeteuk's eyes one last time, then I ran out of my room into the living room, where everyone was relaxing.

Heechul was waiting for me there, and he already had the broom in his hand. I chewed on my lip for a second, then I stood in front of him.

"Yes, sunbaenim," I said, then gave him a deep bow.

"Are you deaf? Why do I need to call you twice?" asked Heechul, clearly displeased.

"I'm sorry," I said quietly, looking at my feet.

Heechul just glared at me while I kept my head bowed, then he spoke.

"Let's talk about what happened a few days ago," he said.

I lowered my head even more.

"Do you or do you not deserve a beating?" he asked.

I didn't say anything.

Heechul snorted at my nonresponse.

"Get down," he said.

I felt my face flush, and looking up at him, I got on my knees.

"Wait," I pleaded. "I can't do it. Please. I promise I'll never be rude again."

"GET DOWN!" shouted Heechul, then he prodded me with the broom, and before I knew it, I hit the broom away with my hand and jumped up to my feet.

"Don't - don't touch me!" I shouted in informal speech. "D - don't you lay a finger on me, or - "

There were shocked faces all around the room and a silence, then Heechul spoke.

"Or what?" asked Heechul, a leering smile on his face.

"Or I'll - I'll kill you."

The words had escaped my mouth before I had time to think them through, but even if I did think them through, I'm fairly sure I'd have said the same thing.

I had to protect myself.

The smile slid off Heechul's face.

"You're one scary kid, Cho Kyuhyun," said Heechul quietly.

I didn't say anything and just stood my ground.

"Cho Kyu - "

"Don't touch me," I repeated, cutting him off, but my voice was still shaking.

"Kyuhyun."

I looked up to see Leeteuk walking towards me. He put his hand on my shoulder, and I flinched at this as well. He looked flustered for a second, but then gripped my arm firmly, much to my panic.

"Let - let go!" I shouted. I pulled my arm away, feeling tears of fear welling up in my eyes.

Seeing me panicked, Leeteuk let go quickly and held up both his hands. "Okay. Okay, Kyuhyun," said Leeteuk. "I let go. Get a grip and go to your room."

"No, Park Jungsu, what are you doing?" said Heechul, enraged.

Leeteuk just looked at Heechul for a few seconds, then he spoke quietly. "Heechul, I don't want to have this argument with you again, but I think - I think he's been really upset for the last week or so. Don't hit him anymore."

"If he did something wrong, then he needs to accept the consequences!" yelled Heechul.

Leeteuk ignored him and looked at me. "Kyuhyun, go to your room," said Leeteuk.

But despite my will, I couldn't move; I was frozen into place with my hands over my chest. Then Leeteuk looked to the rest of them.

"Someone help him to his room. Maybe you, Ryeowook," said Leeteuk.

Ryeowook rushed to my side and grabbed my arm, but I drew away sharply without meaning to.

I was horrified at myself for a second, then I justified it in my mind.

I couldn't let anyone touch me.

And then I started shaking.

Seeing this, Leeteuk totally turned his back on Heechul and looked at me.

"Kyuhyun, who do you want to help you?" asked Leeteuk, dismayed.

I looked up at him.

He's not here.

I felt the tears fall out of my eyes. "I - I can take care of myself," I whispered.

Leeteuk clenched his fists like he was going to punch me, and I felt myself stiffen up again. However, Leeteuk just nodded. "Okay, then go to your room."

I took a deep breath and walked down the hallway, and just as I did, I heard Leeteuk say to Heechul, "I'll keep Kyuhyun away from you, so just stay away from him."

I ignored it all as I walked into Ryeowook and Leeteuk's bedroom and closed the door. I got into the bed and covered myself with the blanket from head to toe. Then I just let the tears flow from my eyes silently until I stopped shaking.