"Ryeo - Ryeowook," I stuttered.

"Doc - doctor, is he really sick?" he whispered in horror.

There was complete silence and stasis in the room for a few seconds, then everyone burst into a flurry of movements and talks.

"Here, let me just - " said the intern, flustered, then he quickly shoved the towel in my hand before realizing what he did and snatching it up again, and Seunghwan hyung shouted, "Ryeowook!" at the same time that Ryeowook rushed closer to my bed, yelling, "Kyuhyun, you look - "

"I - "

"I'm going to give you some time alone," said the intern, then he wiped my face one last time with the dry towel before getting up quickly from the stool. He hurried out of the room before any of us could say anything, and closed the door hurriedly behind himself. As soon as he left, Ryeowook came closer to my bed and bit his lip.

"Kyuhyun, you were never this thin! You're half the size that you were before, why are you so thin?"

I shook my head. "I - I'm not, I - "

I opened my mouth to tell him I was doing okay and that he shouldn't worry when I remembered why I'd so wanted to see Ryeowook on that night while I was lying on the side of the road and during my stay at the hospital.

The scene played in my head, and I shook my head to clear it. I didn't even want to think about what I'd said to him. I had to tell him what an amazing friend he was, that he was the best friend I'd ever had.

I was about to reach out for his hand from where I was when Ryeowook curled up his hands into tight fists and put them to his chest.

"You look like a skeleton!" he shouted, shaking his head.

I took a deep breath and tried to hold my hand out for him to take when -

"Ryeowook, come here."

Ryeowok looked up at the same time that I turned my head to look at who was speaking, then I realized that it was Seunghwan hyung, who was now sitting upright in his bed.

"Come here," he said, opening his arms.

Ryeowook hesitated for a second before finally taking his eyes off me and going over to Seunghwan hyung's bed and buried himself in Seunghwan hyung's embrace.

"Hyung, I'm really sorry for not coming to visit. I was just - so - "

"It's okay. You must have been busy," said Seunghwan hyung with a small laugh and patting Ryeowook's back. "Kyuhyun's really tired right now, so let's give him some peace and quiet, okay?"

Ryeowook nodded. "Sorry," he whispered.

I saw Seunghwan hyung slide over on his bed to make room for Ryeowook to sit on, and Ryeowook sat down next to him reluctantly.

"What took you so long?" asked Seunghwan hyung.

Ryeowook didn't respond for a long time but spoke quietly. "I just - I wasn't going to - come, but - but the hyungs made me. Because I - I wasn't - doing well during the movie."

And hearing that, I felt my eyes well up again. He wasn't here because he wanted to see me, but because the hyungs told him to be here? Tears of disappointment and worry that he wasn't going to forgive me filled my eyes again.

"Ryeowook, you don't look too good," he sighed.

"I'm - I'm okay," he whispered. "I'm much better than I should be."

"You've lost so much weight. I didn't think it would be possible. And you just - you just look terrible."

At the words, Ryeowook hung his head and Seunghwan hyung sighed again.

"You haven't been eating."

"I - I have been," whispered Ryeowook, but Seunghwan hyung shook his head.

"Don't lie to me," he said, and Ryeowook hung his head lower.

There was a long silence, and I saw Ryeowook chewing on him lip. And then a few minutes later, I heard sniffling, and then a chuckle.

"Our maknaes have too many tears," said Seunghwan hyung, wrapping his arm around Ryeowook and wiping the tears on Ryeowook's face. Ryeowook remained silent, but Seunghwan hyung chuckled again. "It's okay. It's because you're both so softhearted."

As Ryeowook cried his tears, I took a deep breath. Here he was. My best friend.

The face I so wanted to see when I was faced with death.

I shuddered at the thought, then worked up my courage and called him softly.

Even if he didn't forgive me, I'd at least have apologized.

"Ryeowook," I whispered.

 But Ryeowook didn't say anything and stayed where he was with his head still down. And seeing him ignore me, I felt tears come to my eyes again.

"Ryeowook," I pleaded again.

He still didn't say anything. I drew in another breath to tell him I was sorry and to beg for forgiveness when he finally spoke.

"Wait," he whispered. "Let - let me just do it myself."

I was so confused that I just stared at him as he got up from Seunghwan hyung's bed. Seunghwan hyung's arm that had been around Ryeowook's shoulders fell, and Ryeowook walked closer to my bed. And then he stood by my bed, wringing his hands together and biting his lip. Another tear fell from his eye.

"Ryeo - Ryeowook," I said.

I held out my hand for him to take, but he didn't see it; he was staring only at his feet. I saw a few tears fall from his eyes, and I dropped my hand.

"H - hey," I croaked, and then I reached out and grabbed his hand. "I - I'm really sorry f - for what I said. You - you're actually a really - really good friend."

"But Kyu - Kyu - " whimpered Ryeowook, then he sank to his knees beside my bed.

Flustered, I tugged on his hand to get him to stand. "Wait, don't - don't kneel there, I - I threw up there a few days ago," I said, but Ryeowook didn't budge and kept his head down.

"No, you were right, I'm such a terrible friend," he said through his tears. "I did this to you. It's only because of me that you're sick." He sniffled, then he hung his head again. "It's all my fault. I did this."

"You didn't," I croaked. "No one d - did this. Ac - accidents happen. B - but I - what I said - wasn't - wasn't an accident. And I - I'm so sorry," I whispered.

Ryeowook shook his head and after a little while, then finally lifted his head.

"Kyuhyun, are you really hurt?" asked Ryeowook, wiping his tears.

I shook my head as hard as I could. "N - no, I'm not. I ac - actually feel really - really good now that you're here."

"But you don't look so good," he managed. "You're so thin."

"You too," I said, feeling Ryeowook's bony hand in mine. Then suddenly, Ryeowook got up and let go of my hand. I saw him make his way to the door. Flustered, I tried calling him again.

"Wait, wait, Ryeowook, I didn't mean - "

But Ryeowook had gone to the doorway for the plastic bag he had in his hand. He was soon back on the stool and had opened up the plastic bag.

"I just - brought this for you, because - because - I'm - I'm so sorry," said Ryeowook tearfully, then he opened the small container. He opened the container to reveal a container full of what looked like meatballs.

"I wanted to make - something better, but - but Heechul hyung said you couldn't eat very well yet, so - "

I stared for a second. I knew that I should tell him that all I'd eaten for the  last three and a half weeks was apple juice and thin porridge, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I wanted to show him that I forgave him, and if I told him that I wasn't going to eat his food, I knew I'd hurt my best friend.

"Thank you so much," I said genuinely, then I picked up a meatball with my hand. I was about to put it in my mouth when I heard Seunghwan hyung speak.

"Kyuhyun," said Seunghwan hyung in a warning tone. I looked up at him and stared at him. Oh god, he was going to stop me.

My eyes widened and filled with tears.

Please let me just eat it. This is more important to me than my body right now.

I felt the hand that was holding the meatball shaking. He opened his mouth to say something when I felt the tears fall out of my eyes. Seunghwan hyung bit his lip as I still stared. I waited for him to speak while another tear fell. Seunghwan hyung bit his lip as I stared, and he sighed and looked away from me.

And at having the manager hyung's wordless approval, I began stuffing my mouth full with Ryeowook's food.

I knew it was a mistake as soon as I swallowed. My body wasn't ready for this yet. I felt it come back up, but I grabbed another meatball with my shaking hand and forced it into my mouth before it could come up.

I kept the food down for only a few more minutes before I threw up, to my horror, all over my covers. My eyes watered as I retched and Ryeowook stood up from the stool so fast that he dropped the container from his lap.

"Oh my god!" cried Ryeowook. "I've made you sick! Kyuhyun, I've made you sick!"

"Ryeowook, I'm sorry!" I said through my tears. I kept my mouth covered with my hand, but I didn't know what to do about what I'd already thrown up. "I'm really sorry!"

"Ryeowook, go get the nurse or - " began Seunghwan hyung, but the door opened, cutting him off. The intern had clearly heard the yelling and had run inside. He saw that I'd thrown up, and he quickly began cleaning me up.

"Doctor, I'm so sorry, I think - I think I made him sick, but - but I didn't do anything weird to it, I promise," said Ryeowook tearfully.

The intern smiled. "It's not your fault. Kyuhyun isn't strong enough to eat solid food yet. I guess he didn't tell you."

Ryeowook widened his eyes and shook his head as the intern.

"Doctor, I - I'm really sorry," I said once I'd been put in a fresh shirt and clean, new covers had been placed over me.

"Kyuhyun, you know you're not allowed to eat everything yet," sighed the intern.

"I know, d - doctor," I muttered. "I - I shouldn't have t - tried. I'm sorry."

"So why did you eat it?" demanded Ryeowook.

"Because I wanted to eat what you gave me, and I just - "

"Okay," said the intern hastily. "It's okay. Don't cry. Don't cry anymore."

"I won't let him cry anymore," said Ryeowook through his own tears.

"Both of you, take care of yourselves," sighed the intern. "Can I leave you alone?"

The two of us looked at the intern, our eyes round, and nodded. And the intern sighed.

"Please behave. You're making it so hard on me."

"Sorry," Ryeowook and I said at the same time, and with a tired smile, the intern left the room. Ryeowook inched closer to my bed again.

"Ryeowook," I said, a smile forming on my face.

I held out both of my hands, and Ryeowook took them both in his own bony hands. We held on tightly, and Ryeowook sat down on my bed beside me with a small smile. I squeezed his hands.

"Who's doing - my chores around the dorm? And yours?"

"The hyungs are taking turns doing all of them."

"Are you still practicing singing a lot?"

"I haven't been singing for a while, but I think I'll be able to again now."

We continued the small conversations, and beside us, Seunghwan hyung smiled a fatherly smile as he watched the two of us exchange such small talk while holding each other's hands tightly.

*Author's note: I have a new fic: Change :D